2014b: The Bruce Boxleitnering · 9:34am Jan 12th, 2014
This is your brain on Skirts...
So I did a blargh the other day, unabashedly demanding marsupials' words of syrupy comfort ideas on what they'd like to see from SS&E in the year 2014. After perusing the humble comments, I compiled a list of the shiet that stood out the most to me. It is, more or less, as follows:
-Dark Comedy
-Octavia
-More blog posts
-Appledash
-Long form narrative
-Sprawling epic
-Dark Fics
-Something with Fluttershy
-More comedy
-Bon^12
-Long, mind bending, serious, comedic
-Soldier pony's letters to mother
-Horror stories
-Appledash
-End of Ponies Appendices (?)
-Beachtavia, Pony In Hell, Twistclops
-Bullshiet pic blogs
-Less defeatist shiet
-Pony in Hell
-Tron crossover
-Teen Titans crossover
-Thought provoking shiet
-"Retail" satire
-Unnecessary sequels
-Tron ponies
-Deep horror
-Appledash
-Background Pony sized epic / Pony in Hell
-Eldritch Twilight
-marine mammal sperm
-classic horror
-Disney Princesses
-Saros shiet
-Dark Comedy
-DEEP stories
-World Building
-Mindless violence / Frozen and Tangled Crossover
-Couchtavia Sequel (?)
-Appledash / slice of life / Dark Comedy
-More dayum blog posts
-non sequitur comedies
-dark tragedies
-long form / noir / blogs / appledash
-cracktastic fic
-introspective / sad stuff
-dark, meaningful
Gathering all of this into a cute little pile on my bed and then proceeding to roll my hairy body all over them, I've determined a few key things that marsupials appear to be drooling the most for. Please correct me if I am wrong:
-Dark shiet
-Comedic shiet
-Deep shiet
-Long form shiet
-Crazy shiet
-Horror shiet
-Appledash shiet
-Blargh shiet
In addition to that, I seem to have received quite a remarkably large number of requests for continuing "I Met a Pony in Hell," which kind of struck me by surprise.
I suppose a much more pertinent question would be what fanfics of SS&E would you like to see sequels to in 2014? Feel free to answer that one if you like.
But back to the subject at tentacle. Allow me to comment on each of them.
Dark Shiet
Don't I do enough of these? Even when I'm trying to make shiet funny, there's blood, death, and abominable horrors involved. F'naaaaa.
Still, what about dark for being dark's sake? I feel as if that's a bit old-hat when it comes to ponyfiction. Truth is, I've got a lot of stupidly dark ideas in mind. I simply haven't tackled them because I feel like they have very little depth. Rather, I think stories that explore darkness and then attempt to bring the reader (and the story's protagonist, collectively) to the light are a great deal more worth tackling... or even stumbling upon.
I think when I started writing stuff like EoP and Last Tears in Tartarus, I patted myself on the back, because I felt like I was being intensely edgy by having ponies mixed with torture and apocalyptic desolation. That's no longer quite the drive. I'd rather see ponies happy and achieving their dreams. I told myself this after finishing Background Pony, and I attempted--or so I thought--to write more stories in 2013 that had ponies experiencing happy endings (shush, u).
However, when I wrote "There Is Love Beyond What Lingers" a month ago (a story that I'm personally very proud of), I felt as though I was "returning" to a place of great comfort and familiarity, as horrible as that sounds. I don't mind delving into dark areas if it means utilizing the whole experience as some sort of uplifting means to a catharsis.
That in mind, I've had a few ideas (since the beginning of time) that can work, such as "Turn" (time travel, romantic angst, collapse of reality), "In the Darkness Where I Seek You" (death, loss, and more death), "Doorwalkers" (the story that inspired Chromosome's Bezithan), and "Ponymonium" (an idea literally as old as EoP, and almost three times as obsolete).
Thing is, most of them are supremely epic in scope, and I've a terribly lazy lemur as of late. But more on that later...
Comedic Shiet
To be honest, I really-really feel like I should be putting comedy to a rest. According to an elect group of intelligent Internet do-gooders, my attempt at making marsupials laugh is really just an exercise in random absurdity and blatant crack!ficcage. Thing is, I enjoy that shiet, but it doesn't mean that my readers to. And I think, in the year 2013 especially, I tried to do funny/light-hearted/slice of life a little too much. I got used to the ease of it. And, as a result, I got lazier. I mean, two of my three unfinished things are comedies, for Nietzsche's sake (BDO and that fic with the Gingering).
This isn't to say I don't have comedic ideas. "Blood and Nuts" would see a return to psychotic-militant-squirrels-in-Equestria. "Pinbonbon" is an experiment that I think would rock, but I'm not ready at this point in my life to attempt a 100,000+ single chapter real time fanfic. And then there's "Bon Bon and Lyra Do Equestria," which is a fic with a title that just begs to be made.
I suppose the closest thing that I could tackle--and calling it "comedic" is a bit of a stretch--is "Beachtavia." There are certain zebras who attest to this thing being a good idea. I guess what holds me back is that it's ever-so-slightly a remake of a story arc I did back in my TT days, and it sort of mirrors "Couchtavia" much like Home Alone 2 emulated Home Alone 1. Meh. Moving right along.
Deep Shiet
Marsupials say that I'm good at this shiet. In truth, I've simply gotten lucky at it. Most of my stories are idiotic, inept, inane, and other adjectives beginning with the alphabet's least sexy vowel. Being deep is hard, no matter how pornographic that may sound. But, for cereal, it takes a great deal of poise, balance, research, and commitment to make words jump out and do things that are even snazzier than exploding. Again, I've got a lot to work on my laziness.
I promised a certain someone ages ago that I'd put a fic on my itinerary--and I think we all know what happened to that. But basically it was a story called DJ-P0N4, and it was gonna take a Vinyl Scratch indicative of the cameo from Background Pony--an uber popular but substance-addicted celebrity unicorn--and have her suddenly kick all her life's habits while transforming her anguish into creative juices, introducing an Equestrian version of "electroswing" to the poni poni poni masses. It would have ripped off a lot of shiet from the Tony Stark persona of Iron Man and projected some of the feelings I've had about being a self-deprecating fanficcer... lulz. That could still have the potential to be something, but at this rate, I dunno.
There's also "It's a Mare's World," which I've brought up to Candlestick Head on many occasions. It'd be an attempt to portray feminist ideas through a sort of ironic, inverted scenario, set in Ponyville. I'm sure it sounds like something other lemurs have produced, only this story isn't a comedy and Big Mac's not in it.
Long form Shiet
This sort of resonates with me the most out of all of them, mostly because I can see how 2013 was like "the year of the one-shot," and it didn't really get me anywhere. Sure, we had stuff like "Scale" and "Funeral of Derpy Hooves," but none of them breached 100,000 words.
I have at least two stories in mind that have the potential of hitting that mark, and I feel strongly about them. One is "In the Darkness Where I Seek You," the Octavia fic. I actually started writing it nearly twelve months ago, and I got to about 50,000 words in before I slacked off. And that was when the fic was only 1/3 done. I didn't really have an excuse to stop writing it, but I'm a bit glad I did, because it can definitely use some restructuring--both thematically and structurally. Let's say it's not easy to write a story about death, romance, the afterlife, and put it all into an Orpheus-style epic narrative with copious amounts of paranormal world-building. But dayum if it's not fun.
The other one is Bon^12, but the less said about that the better.
The biggest obstacle at the moment is that I am already involved--more or less--with two completely separate long-form fics that are being written one chapter everyday. One of them is "Austraeoh," the work of my good friend Imploding Colon. The other one is... well... it's best that we not reveal it until the author has a chance to prove her or himself.
The ironic thing is that I've known a person or two who'll swear left and right that SS&E SUCKS at long form. My fics start out with a sexy-as-fuck premise, but then mutate into something tumorous, aimless, self-indulgent, meandering, and pedantic. I think the reason for this is that I see stories as an experience, and oftentimes I write them so that the scenes/individual moments outweight the endgame of the journey... if that makes any goddayum sense.
That said, I vaguely promised Ponky that by the time he came back, I would have nearly 80 fanfics under my monicker. As the months go by and I get lazier and more worthless, I'm starting to doubt such will ever happen. Maybe it's better that I focus on lesser fics, but just worked on them being bigger and more epic. I dunno. Panties.
Crazy Shiet
Bon^12. Enough said.
Or maybe not. I also have an idea in my head caled "6s & 7s." I almost spontaneously wrote it and uploaded it back in November, but I had the good grace to hold back, cuz I probably would have lost several hundred subscribers from the sheer wyrdness.
Let's just say that the itch to experiment is always there, but I kinda wanna be poignant with said wyrdness, like in "Turn" where the use of second-person and first-person narrative becomes so blurred amidst the streams of consciousness plotline that all sense of reality and time is completely lost--which would be the point, seeing as the fanfic deals with an FF8ish style "Time Crunch."
And then there's "Sugarcube Seven," which would look, feel, and sound like Cloverfield in textual form. Yeah. It already sounds like a bad idea, doesn't it?
Horror Shiet
So yeah, "Sugarcube Seven." Imagine crossing House of Leaves with Cloverfield with The Exorcist with V/H/S with... I dunno... A Serbian Film? This would be my obligatory "Hey! I wanna do a Cupcakes/Rainbow Factory of my own!" fic... which might explain why I haven't bothered doing it. Not that I'm against writing violence for violence's sake. Look at "Fake-Takers" for crying out loud.
Still, it's a story I look forward to, if only for the audacious attempt at experimental narration that it would employ. If I ever went through with it, though, there is a very high chance that'd it bomb. Still, no major loss, I presume.
I've also wanted to adapt an original story idea, "Patchwork," into ponydom. But I dunno. Just thinking about what happens in that story makes me wanna barf.
I wanna be good at horror stuff, but I always go way too overboard. I think my best horror moments happen in fanfics that weren't meaning to have them from the get-go. So maybe I should tackle comedy. F'naaa.
Appledash Shiet
No duh I wanna do this. I just can't figure out a way to tackle the subject without coming across as too silly or gratuitous. I like to think I've found outlets for this, but f'naaa.
I actually have one good (extremely good) Appledash story in mind, but I've almost killed it by putting it off on more than one occasion. In fact, I was so ready to do it in October that I commissioned the cover art. It was actually finished, and it sits on my HD, waiting for a story to be written out. Why did I never tackle it? I dunno. I think Appledash is such a selfish topic to me. That is, I know that I would enjoy writing it--I don't know if the marsupial alumni would. Perhaps this means it's something I'd rather read than write, so that someone else with greater talent and gumption could make the fantas(ies) come true for me. This has happened with Candlestick head, after all, and he made a masterpiece out of it.
So... uh... how about it? Will write fanfics for Appledash? @_@
Who am I kidding. I'd rather write fanfics for fanart.
Blargh Shiet
Yeah. I don't do enough of these, do I?
Somewhere in early 2013, the frequency and intensity of blogs dropped like an anvil. Part of this can be blamed on Ponky withdrawal. Another part on laziness.
The rest? Well, I'm not exactly the most cheerful person. Or--at least--I'm not quite as ecstatic and bouncy as I was back when the Background Pony adulation was rolling in by the truckload. Here I am in early 2014, and I'm looking back on what was--quite frankly--a year of failure and disappointment. I no longer have the impetus to go on manic ramblings of pretentious drivel and arrogant self-importance. Also, I've been fasting Dr. Pepper for about five months now, so... I'm a lot more mellow.
I often wonder if marsupials really give a flying fetus over blarghs. Whether they be the sickeningly in-depth ones, the words of a raving lunatic, the cryptic bullshiet bits, or the moments of pastel fetish exhibitionism. I still feel as though the person who reveals the most about himself is the lamest (I'll be regretting this dayum blargh in the morning), and I think that--on top of lack of inspiration--is an excuse for why I haven't slathered my words across these nubile boards quite so often lately. After all, I haven't written a whole lot these past months, so why ramble incessantly about nothing?
...only I've done just that right now. Someone euthanize me.
End Thoughts
Keep in mind, a lot of the titles and fics I've spouted out may not be worked on for a while... if ever.
Regardless, I'm very jazzed about picking "In the Darkness Where I Seek You" back up. It's long form, dark, deep, and full of world-building. I think it's the closest we'll get to "classic skirts" without... y'know... resurrecting the elephant.
When it comes to Appledash, I have what I think is a very, very good story that's both deep, dark, and at the same time emotionally positive and cathartic. Also, fans of Scootaloo would likely dig it, so there's killing two cats (and a chiken?) with one stone.
As for crazy and cracktastic, I may not be very warm to comedies, but I think Bon^12 will fit the groove. But even if I wrote that magically overnight, I wouldn't go up until months from now at the earliest, for reasons that are complicated... but could end up proving really sexy if a whole bunch of planning falls through.
Beachtavia is a great idea, and though I've lost enthusiasm for it at the moment, I happen to know marsupials of great intelligence and wisdom who wanna see it reach the light of day, so I'll have it on the immediate backburner.
I'm still a bit wyrded out by how many marsupials mentioned "I Met a Pony In Hell (and We Kicked Ass Together," at least in spirit. I have a sequel in mind, but I gotta hammer out the plot, while at the same time plotting out a third fic (It's supposed to be a trilogy). There are a lot of challenges, though, namely the fact that I'd likely go back and convert the first fic to rated M in order to match the shiet I have planned. Also, I've got ideas that border (more like assault) the boundaries of political incorrectness, so I gotta see if I'm ready to go through with that or not.
But, as for now, I think I need to set my priorities straight, fast Youtube, do push-ups, go on walks--whatever. I need to get my head in the game, because once I get rolling, then I'll stop letting myself down (and you marsupials in turn).
And the first idea on the agenda is a medium sized fic that--if done right--could probably be tackled during a week or two of solid writing. For the time being, I'm calling (more like stealing) it "Person Mare," but... y'know... abandon hope all ye who... hope.
-SS&E
P.S: Aw Hell, one more for the road:
Well, looking at the like count on the comments on your previous blog post.
You have three choices.
A. Do more blog posts - With a count of 7 Likes
B. Do a story about a Pony stuck under a rock - With a count of 7 Likes
C. The Beginning of Ponies - With a whopping 10 Likes
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Does this blog count as "blog shiet"?
If so, then way to go! You've already knocked one item off the list!
Keep up the pace and you could be done by the end of the week.
And people say writing is hard.
But for real, I can't believe I forgot to mention I Met A Pony In Hell. I, too, would totally love to see that fic get sequel'd all over the place.
The story was silly fun, sometimes all you need is silly fun to enjoy and remember a story.
Just combine them all!
Some long Appledash horror story that tackles deep subjects, while having dark comedy sprinkled throughout the story. Having the characters yell "Blargh!" at random times would be good, too.
You are in a very Disney mood aren't you Skirts... and how could you fast the Dr. Pepper???
this year sounds like it'll bevery busy for you. Let's see where you'll go with it though... 
It's good to see you're getting back on track - not just for the selfish reason of more stories for us to read, but also because it seems to be something that would satisfy you. A lot of your blogs have been kinda depressing lately, and not in the enjoyable way of ponies suffering existential crises. I've said it before and I'll no doubt say it again: happy author is best author.
Overall, happy tidings. Octavia epic? Check. Appledash? Check. And (though I failed to mention it in the other blog) IMAPIHAWKAT sequel? Maybe check. Et cetera.
I have to agree concerning your comedies. Make no mistake: I really dig your sense of humor, and I tend to enjoy your comedies in all their lobotomizing glory. But you have written quite a lot of them lately, and often at the expense of the more substantial stories that first allured my cursor of your follow button.
In summary: Glad to see you motivated again, and here's hoping you join us on the short-bus to Contentmentville.
I would be remiss if I didn't point you here:
http://www.fimfiction.net/blog/274081/beyond-ponies
Not to imply that there is a life worth living outside ponies, but if you choose to accept that faulty premise, it might as well be for the glory of ponies.
Amen to that.
I guess positivity is out of the question then?
Whatever. Write sea ponies.
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Sequels I'd like to see...
Pick one of your unfinished stories that will likely never ever be finished and write out a sequel where everypony constantly references insanely awesome non-canon things that you never actually wrote. Be sure to include OC life partners for everypony that you also never explain.
You have no idea how much I approve of this phrase
Don't do more blogs... Please god don't do more blogs.
Not that I don't mind them at all, just... You don't need to do that at all.
As for sequels... Why not do one for Scale?
I absolutely loved that one and would love to see how she adapts to her new life.
~Skeeter The Lurker
Ah, whatever, I'll just read whatever you post because I think you're cool like that. Though, my favorite story of yours is still Scale.
Love you skirtsy!
In the darkness where I seek you was one of the fics I was looking forward to when you first announced it. Yes I do think finishing that one out would be good.
As for 6's and 7's -- I don't think you will lose followers by posting something too off-the-wall. If you are that afraid of posting it under skirts, post it elsewhere.
Personally I do like weird, but I like weird and deep more than weird and shallow.
The other is long form/epic. It doesn't have to be a 500,000+ word behemoth to not be a 50,000 fic. There is a whole world of writing between the two. Something in the 200-300k range would combine the best of both.
While I am looking for something deep, the vinyl thing doesn't pique my interest unfortunately.
As for actual sequel sequels, I would be more for new than rehash.
They might be giants...
Eldritch Twilight caught my attention. Also, someone needs to write a sequel to Hello, Sedna.
I just want to say "Don't please your reader, write what you want to write."
I dunno but it feels like you're trying so hard to please us ever since that blog of yours that talking how shitty as a writer you are. But honestly, I follow you and read your stories because the way you write and how you have an amazing ideas of plotline.
So, just write like you always do and we (the loyal marsupials) will read it.
The summary seems to be "I suck at everything I attempt, and that which doesn't suck is blatant self-indulgence. Why are you people following me?"
I respectfully disagree.
Also, I for one would eagerly read your stories of orange horse and rainbow horse in wuv.
This should be part of a series. Other stories might include "Particle Mare," "Triangle Mare," and "Universe Mare."
1710659
If there were any fic he wrote that is complete but feels like it needs more it is that one -- BUT I have a hard time picturing just what he would do to improve Hello, Sedna. I mean there is always the space opera kind of thing with last survivor twilight running around the universe, but that seems a bit detracting.
It is fitting and apt in my headcanon that Celestia tends to give up at the end of Equestria, but Twilight always seems to find a way to forge on.
You need nothing else.
Someone find every story on the site that updates once a day and let's see if we can pinpoint Skirts.
DJ-P0N4... Vinyl Scratch as a Tony Stark-like figure emerging from a cycle of self-destruction?
I think I would read that.
Welp, SS&E 2014 seems pretty promising. So long as you keep enjoying it, can't wait to read whatever you publish.
Oh. My. Go--
Well, damn it.
Though if you ever write it, be sure that you'll have me amongst many lining up to read it.
Sheit. Pass a couple of those titles my way, I suck at naming things, especially fics.
I'm pretty sure that if bunches of people are asking for Appledash, its not selfish to write. Or not totally selfish, anyway. Anyway, writing should be selfish. If it makes you feel good to write, people can usually sense that extra effort, and if they can't or it just isn't for them, at least you care about it and enjoyed the process. And if you do make other people happy in the process, well, you've got yourself a double whammy. The good kind. Not the bad kind from that game show.
What I'm trying to say is: write what you like, we're all just along for the ride (and I'm totally not just saying that because you apparently would really like to write Appledash that I would really like to read...)
Keep being you and we'll keep being us, and everything will fall into place somewhere along the way.
Any stories you wish to write will be fine in the End.
I like most all the ideas you have been speaking Of.
What really matters is that you keep writing Ponies.
Personally Skirts, I want to see a upbeat scifi adventure horror from you.( I know you could do it too)
Sequels? Hello Sedna, Pony in Hell.
Something your friend Mr Colon would be suited for? A Schlock Mercenary crossover.