I Broke Down... · 3:31am Oct 8th, 2013
Guys, I've had some seriously shit days lately, to the point that I actually considered some bad things...
I've been rather drunk the entire time so that actually helped.
But I've done what no one should ever do. I gave into peer pressure.
I was viewing the newest upload of the wonderful musician Dan Bull (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_C748j9mgJk watch it you cowards!) and it made me think:
Brain: "Why have I not watched this? Everyone is flipping out because she apparently flaunts her breasts-"
Penis: "WATCH IT WATCH IT WATCH IT WATCH IT WATCH IT WATCH IT WATCH IT WATCH IT WATCH IT-"
Heart: "Maybe we shouldn't... We've been through alot with the wedding and what Dad did-"
Brain: "We're watching it."
4 minutes later...
Penis: "GODS ABOVE! WHO THE FUCK AUTHORIZED THIS?!?!"
Brain: "I don't understand... She wants to be taken seriously... So she strips down and acts like a hooker on camera while singing some random drivel about some guy she isn't with anymore because she couldn't change him enough to stay with him?"
Heart: "Anyone feel even slightly sympathetic for how that poor girl is going to feel once she figures out that she just destroyed her career as anything but a pornstar?"
Penis: "I WILL NEVER ALLOW US TO WATCH THAT MONSTROSITY PERFORM ANYTHING REMOTELY SIMILAR TO THE SACRED ART OF PORNOGRAPHY!"
Brain: "I'm serious... Dafuq Miley?"
Mouth: "Um... Guys? Penis has been making me scream everything out loud and our roommates aren't happy..."
Brain: "We'll make them watch it... They'll understand."
Seriously... NEVER give into social trends or peer pressure of any sort. I've never once seen it lead to a positive long-term personal development.
Penis: "SERIOUSLY! KILL IT WITH FIRE!"
Brain: "Penis, we're done with the blog post about the whole wrecking ball fiasco."
Penis: "NO WE ARE NOT! SOMEONE NEEDS TO GIVE US BRAIN BLEACH!"
Brain: "...Excuse me?"
Penis: -poker face-
Penis: "So we all agree to never speak of this again?"
Brain: "You mean similar to how Rarity forced her friends to ignore her sexual arousal to a rock she named Tom?"
Rarity: "Darling, I do hope you didn't just slander my noble personage with such a crass and unfounded accusation..."
-Dead silence-
Penis: "Did Rarity just..."
Brain: "Yep."
Penis: "And she's threatening..."
Brain: "Yep."
Penis: "Closet?"
Brain: "Closet."
End.
So now Rarity is part of your inner monologue? Welcome to my life...
pulls up YouTube vid
What the fuck am I listening too?
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That would depend on which video you pulled up...
Penis: "WE SWORE TO NEV-"
We are all aware of this fact Penis.
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Incidentally, if even Penis hates it, I'm out.
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Penis: "HATE WOULD REQUIRE A POSSIBILITY OF A POLAR OPPOSITE EMOTION EXISTING! ENGLISH HATH NO WORD CAPABLE OF EXPRESSING HOW WROTH ME BE AT THIS MONSTROSITY!"
Brain: "Guys, powwow time."
-Group huddle while Penis continues screaming-
Brain: "Anyone aware of WHY he's so upset by this that he turned into Luna?"
Luna: "Thou should surely stop drinking at this point."
Penis: "WE SWORE! THOU HAST FORSAKEN THY OATH BRAIN! NOW WE MUST KUNG FU FIGHT!"