Dream come true?

by Storm Shine

First published

HiE fic. A rather average brony known as John has been kidnapped and injected with odd powers, before being launched into Equestria. What will he do now that he's in the land of ponies? (Somewhat inspired by the 'Power Lottery')

Alrighty... I'm not sure what your stance on HiE fics is, but know I enjoy them. This story was also inspired by the Power Lottery to some extent. To make a long story short, I was reading some fanfics on the site when I came across one that mentioned the power lottery. I got curious and looked it up before attempting the Ex(perimental) Tier, since I'm lazy and wanted to re-roll as little as possible. Each of the powers mentioned in this fanfic are the one's that I actually rolled, believe it or not. :derpytongue2: :pinkiesmile: :twilightsmile:

Disclaimer: I do not own My Little Pony or any of it's characters and ideas. I only own my insanity, though if you want it... Please take it off my hands(Hooves? Brain?)... :pinkiecrazy:

A rather average brony known as John has been kidnapped and injected with odd powers before being launched into the land of Equestria. What will he do now that he's in the land of ponies?

Rated Teen for light swearing and some suggestive content, I may need to change the rating as the story progresses.

Saw the story in the feature box thing here on 2/3/2019.. (AKA today for me as of writing this.) - Did not expect this, but I feel pretty happy about it :pinkiesmile: - Thanks to everyone who enjoys my fic :pinkiehappy:

Ch 1: The Beginning

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Well isn't this great...

Hi there, my name is John and right now I'm sitting in the back of a vehicle with a bag over my head. I guess I'm being kidnapped, though I don't know who's doing this or why. I'm also not sure why I'm so calm about this, generally when someone's kidnapped you'd think they'd freak out or something. But I guess I should back up a bit and explain how I got myself kidnapped in the first place, huh? It's not a very long story, and I'm surprised it even happened at all.

I'm just your average human with a simple job and a simple home. I had just finished walking home from work and was planning to go inside to spend the rest of the day chatting on my usual forums and watching a few of my favorite episodes of My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic before bed.

Unfortunately that plan was smashed to pieces since when I went to open the door to my house; someone came up behind me and smashed a piece of wood over the back of my head. Naturally I was surprised and in pain but thankfully I have a pretty hard head, so I managed to stay conscious. I turned to confront the guy who had done that, ready to punch his lights out.

I might've succeeded too, if he didn't have a partner. Especially since that partner had a taser. Electrified metal prongs? Not fun, not fun at all.

So by now we've left the vehicle and they've been walking me to who knows where for the past few minutes. I'm curious as to where we're going, yet I'm not sure I really want to know. Especially since I have no idea what the heck they want with me. Though if it's a ransom they want, they're going to be severely disappointed.

Finally after what seems like forever we stop and they make me lie down on some sort of metal bed or table or something before strapping me in.

The bag was then taken off my head, allowing me to see that I'm lying in what looks like futuristic lab... And there's some guy in a lab coat standing in front of me.

"Hello there John." He greets me, smiling widely.

"Who are you? Where am I? How do you know my name?" I ask, feeling more than a bit helpless. I think I'm going to call the guy 'Labcoat', I know it's a bit generic and vague but it seems to fit him.

Labcoat chuckled at me, "That's not really important John, or at least not important to you." He says, freeing my right arm before strapping it into some weird device. "What's really important is what is going to happen to you next."

Well if that wasn't ominous as hell...

"You see, my boss has selected you for a very special privilege!" Labcoat informs me, clapping his hands together in glee. "You are going to receive three powers, and then we'll be launching you into a brand new world! What you choose to do with these powers is completely up to you though we'll be keeping tabs on you. We need to monitor how they develop after all."

Yeah, by now I'm pretty convinced that Labcoat over there is crazy. I mean come on, powers? A new world? Can someone say Cuckoo? "Why- AAGGHHH!!!"

My question was cut off before I could really begin as a wave of agony surged through my right arm. It felt like someone had dipped it in molten metal, and unfortunately that feeling was quickly spreading to the rest of my body.

"Yes the process does hurt quite a bit, sorry about that." Labcoat tells me, not sounding sorry at all.

My vision was beginning to go dark, but I heard before succumbing to the darkness attempting to swallow my sight.

"When you wake up, check your pockets for a piece of paper. It will give you an idea of your new capabilities."


"GAH!" I woke up with a jolt. Was that just a dream? No it couldn't have been... Well, regardless I roll over on the grass and attempt to- wait.... Grass?

I stood up and looked around, taking stock of my surroundings. I seemed to be in a forest clearing, the only other thing in the clearing at the moment was a small shrub that almost reached my waist.

Though that's not very impressive given my height, I'm only about 5 feet and 8 inches after all. I'm a skinny Caucasian male with a fair amount of muscle, a swimmer's build I guess... Oh and I have dirty blonde hair, somewhat shaggy but still fairly neat. The bangs would cover my forehead if it wasn't for the cowlick at their base. My eyes have always been a bit odd though, with blue, green, brown, and gold all present in the iris. a ring of green, followed by a ring of blue, with splotches of brown, and webs of gold running all over the place.

Okay getting off track here... I wonder where I am. Maybe I could walk around to see if I could find a town or city. I had to abandon my musings as a voice called through the trees with a distinctly country accent.

"Hello? Anypony there?" It called.

The voice sounded very young, like a child... Maybe I'm in someone's yard?

"Yeah!" I called back, deciding it probably wouldn't hurt anything. "Can you help me out here? I'm a little lost!" I just hope whoever it is isn't lost too. That would suck, though I guess it would be nice to have some company at the very least.

A few of the bushes at the end of the clearing began to rustle before a yellow... pony? A small pony with a yellow coat and red mane walked into the clearing. I was somewhat confused, until it opened its mouth and began to talk.

"Huh, I coulda sworn ah heard somepony calling out from here..." She said, apparently talking to herself.

Many things were racing through my mind at that moment, but a few were the most prevalent. Mostly things like 'Labcoat wasn't crazy...', 'I'm in a new world', and 'holy crap this is Equestria!'

This is awesome! I'm in Equestria! So I guess that must be Apple Bloom. I should introduce myself. Though I'd better avoid using her name right off the bat, that would probably lead to some awkward questions that could make me seem like a stalker or something.

The filly looked around the clearing before turning around, obviously intending to leave.

"Wait!" I called, hoping she would stop and let me ask a few questions. Apple Bloom indeed stopped and turned back to look at me. At least, I thought she was looking at me.

"W-who's there?" she asked nervously, her eyes darting around the clearing.

Okay, now I'm seriously confused. Why can't she see me? I'm standing at least twice as tall as the shrub in front of me... I walked around the shrub and stopped a few feet away from the little earth pony, hoping that would draw her attention to me. "Hello." I greet the filly.

Apple Bloom looks at me with wide eyes, "W-what are you!? And where'd you come from!? You weren't there just a minute ago!" she asked nervously, taking a few steps back and seeming to shiver slightly.

"I've been standing behind that bush since you walked into the clearing..." I told her softly. I slowly kneeled down, hoping to ease some of Apple Bloom's obvious discomfort by making myself seem a bit smaller. I've made myself easier to hit at the very least.

"My name is John and I'm a human, nice to meet you." I introduce, holding out my hand to shake.

You know... I probably would've thought that all of this was a dream if it wasn't for the fact that I haven't actually had one in years.

The filly carefully reaches out her hoof and puts it in my hand, performing a hoof-shake.

"Your name sounds silly Mr. John." The pony replied with a small giggle, visibly relaxing. "Ah'm Apple Bloom." she introduced as the hand- er... Hoof-shake ended. "Wait a minute... There's no way that you could've been standing behind that bush, you're way too big!" Bloom realized, animatedly indicating the bush that's about half my height.

I simply shrugged and walked to stand behind the shrub again, causing Apple Bloom's mouth to drop open. "Mr. John?" she asked, "Where'd ya go?" I chuckled, causing her to jump before walking to stand in front of her again. "I was standing behind the bush." I told her "And you can just call me John, no 'Mr.' needed."

The filly picked her jaw off the ground before tackling me to the ground, "that was awesome John!" she cheered excitedly. "How'd ya disappear like that!?" she asked.

I scratched my head, "I don't know..." I told her, because to be completely honest, I didn't know. Heck I didn't even know that I had disappeared in the first place. Wait... Labcoat said something about giving me powers. So I guess I have superpowers or something now? I also remember that he told me to check my pockets too, something about an explanation.

But before I could check, Apple Bloom began pulling me along by the legs of my pants. "Well maybe Twilight can help ya figure it out!" she exclaimed, leading me through the trees. "She's really smart!"

I followed the earth filly with a friendly smile, "I'm sure she is." I agreed. Being a Brony, I already knew that she was indeed a very smart pony. Though I can only hope that she could help me figure something out for this. Though I think I'll just ask for help with controlling my new powers, since I honestly don't care much about going back to my world; I am living just about every brony's dream after all.

As we walked I reached a hand into my left pocket. Nothing. I reached into my right pocket and pulled out a crumpled piece of paper. Straightening it out, I began to read while following Apple Bloom.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Dear John,

If you are reading this, then you've awoken in the alternate dimension that you were sent to. On this piece of paper are the names of your new powers and a few suggestions as to how you can use them, as well as a couple of their weaknesses.

1. Hide-Behind Physiology:

You can use traits of a creature called the 'Hide-behind'. This allows you to become either invisible or unnoticeable when hiding behind an object or creature, regardless of size or shape. Your physical strength will also be enhanced by this ability.

One 'weakness' is that you will likely develop an aversion to alcohol. The other is that you can only become invisible or unnoticeable when actually behind an object or creature of some sort. You cannot 'Hide-Behind' what isn't there, after all.

2. Cheshire Cat Physiology:

I'm sure you've seen the Cheshire Cat from Alice in wonderland.

This power allows you much the same things: Healing, Evaporation, Shape-shifting, invisibility, intangibility, the ability to walk/float on air. This also gives you some aspects of feline physiology meaning you'll probably receive night vision, retractable claws, predator Instinct, stealth tactics, and enhanced physical attributes such as: agility, balance, jaw strength, flexibility, jump, senses, speed, and strength.

This ability may also change your personality slightly, making you more prone to mischievous thoughts and actions.

3. Absolute Thievery:

I was quite surprised to find that you had received this one. With this ability you will be able to fit into spaces you would usually be unable to physically fit into. You are also able to hide in the shadows, or possibly even in plain sight. You can quite literally steal anything: Objects whether they be tangible or intangible, concepts, landmarks, ideas, powers, rules, laws, physics, time, space, and even yourself; Just about anything and everything is yours for the taking with this power.

Anti-theft wards or powers have no effect on you. You can even steal something without having to actually be present at the location The only true limitation for this power is that you cannot steal from an individual who possesses the abilities of 'Omni-lock' or 'Omniscience'. You may also be susceptible to meta-power manipulation but I doubt any being in your current dimension has a powerful enough version of that ability to actually affect this power.

Side Note: As a side effect of having and/or using this power, you will likely find yourself becoming greedier and greedier over time. This is due to the power making you a literal embodiment of Greed. I'm sure you could control it if you try, but please do be careful either way. After all, I would simply hate for our Boss's investments to go to waste.

I hope you enjoy your newfound powers,
Doctor Labcoat.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I never thought his name would actually be Labcoat...

"John!" Bloom interrupted my thoughts, knocking a hoof to my forehead after having somehow climbed onto my shoulders while I was thinking. "We're here!" she told me, jumping to the ground and knocking on the door to the library.

The door opened relatively quickly, which makes sense. Twilight always seemed very punctual on the show after all. "Hello Apple Bloom, how can I help you?" she asked, not noticing me standing behind the filly.

I quickly shoved the piece of paper back into my right pocket after ripping off the part about 'Absolute Thievery' and putting that into the one on my left. I doubt a power like that would help me gain any trust in this new world, even if the ability was forced on me... Here's hoping I don't have to worry too much about it acting up or anything.

"Actually I don't really need any help, my friend here does," Apple Bloom replied, pointing at me.

Twilight looks behind the filly, seeming to look right through me. "Um," — her ears pull back and she raises a brow. — "Your, uh... Imaginary friend?" Twilight asked skeptically.

"He's not imaginary!" Apple Bloom exclaimed, stamping a hoof. "His name is John and he's standing right behind me, how can you not see him!?" The purple unicorn smiles patiently at the filly.

"I'm sure that John is a very nice pony Apple Bloom. In fact, why don't I just say hello?" Twilight told Apple Bloom, obviously not believing her. She then looks above her head, directly at me and asks, "Hello John, how are you today?"

"I'm doing well Twilight, if a bit disoriented. How are you doing?" I replied politely, causing Twilight to jump as if struck by lightning.

"AAH~!" she screamed, looking around frantically "Who said that!?"

Bloom grinned, "Ah already told ya, his name's John. Ah found him when I was walkin' through the orchard. We were hoping you could help him out a bit."

Twilight looked at the filly again, raising a brow. "Sooo..." -The unicorn began, stretching the word out.-"Where is he?" the unicorn asked.

"Ah told you he's right there!" Apple Bloom responded, pointing at me again.

"I don't see him..." Twilight replied, sounding a little annoyed.

I shook my head and spoke up, stepping to the side of Apple Bloom, "Hello Twilight, my name is John. I'm hoping you can help me with a small problem..."

Twilight's jaw dropped upon seeing me. She quickly recovered and pulled me and Apple Bloom into the library with her magic, closing the door behind us.

While she was dragging us along, I felt something odd. It felt like I was eating something, but not physically. Weird...

Twilight set me down in a chair, sitting on another one across from me. "What are you?" she asked seriously, already making observations and inferences in her head.

I chuckled a bit since I had seen this kind of situation in fanfiction so many times, but never imagined I'd find myself in it. "I'm known as a human Twilight; my kind isn't exactly native to Equestria." I tell her, seeing no real reason to hide the truth.

Twilight nods as she takes noted with her magic. "So how did you get to Equestria? And why couldn't I see you behind Apple Bloom?" she questioned, motioning towards the filly who had followed us into the library.

"That's kinda... complicated." I answer, scratching my neck. "How can I put this... I'm from another dimension. I was kidnapped by someone and sent to this dimension."

Twilight raised a brow, seeming a bit suspicious of the reasons behind that, "Why?"

I shrugged, "No idea"

She shook her head, not sure what to make of it. "Alright so that explains how you got here I suppose... But why couldn't I see you behind Apple Bloom?" Twilight asked, waving a hoof to indicate the earth filly.

I sighed, "Do you know what a Hide-behind is?" I asked.

"Yes I do, I think there's a few in the Everfree forest... What does that have to do with anything?" she replied, a bit puzzled by the sudden question.

I handed Twilight the piece of the paper that explained about the hide-behind and Cheshire cat physiologies.... "These are some of the powers that were forcefully injected into me" I explained as she read the note.

Twilight's muzzle scrunched up adorably as she read the paper. She hummed in thought for a second, before suddenly chucking several books at me. Caught off-guard I yelped and threw my arms up, hoping that the books wouldn't hurt me. As I thought that, I felt an odd sensation spread through my body before hearing several thuds behind me.

Carefully I opened my eyes and looked around, noticing that the books had impacted the wall behind me. "What was that for!?" I cried out, feeling alarmed at her sudden attack and wondering why exactly Twilight had decided to throw books at me.

Instead of responding to the question she simply took her quill the paper and made a mark, "Intangibility, Check!" she narrated happily.

I face-palmed at that, of course she would begin experimenting right away; she is Twilight Sparkle after all...

Ch 2: The Cutie Mark Demon

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Ch 2: The Cutie Mark Demon

I yawned and stretched as I began to wake up. Twilight was nice enough to set me up in a guest bed last night, especially since she kept trying to figure out my different powers.

Though I can't say she didn't make progress, we managed to figure out quite a few of them. For example, I found out that I have claws now. If I flex my hand a certain way, claws pop out of my fingertips.

Another thing we figured out was my shape-shifting. I can do it now but... For some reason I have to spin a bit to change shape. It's a little odd, but still better than nothing. Oh! I also figured out how to-

"John!"

I guess I'd better go see what Twilight wants...

After getting re-dressed, I headed downstairs to find Twilight looking through her notes. "Did you need something?" I asked, startling her into dropping the paper she was reading.

"Oh! Uh... yes, perfect timing," Twilight responded, looking up at me. "Could you run an errand for me? Spike is currently a bit... Occupied, helping my friend Rarity." She explained, looking a bit annoyed that her assistant had already bolted for the boutique.

I shrugged, "Sure thing Twilight, what do you need?" I asked, figuring that helping out a bit was the least I could do after she let me stay over for the night and helped me with my new abilities.

"Could you take this to my friend Fluttershy?" Twilight levitated a medium-sized book over to me, dissipating the magical field as I grabbed hold of it. "She checked that out the last time she was here, but forgot it on the table. Her cottage is in that"- Twilight pointed in the direction of Fluttershy's cottage "-direction. It's the only house in the area, and it's on a hill. You should be able to find it pretty easily."

I nodded, already walking towards the door. "No problem Twilight, consider it done." I called over my shoulder. Unfortunately, I was stopped from walking further by the purple aura of her magic.

"Ahem..." Twilight coughed, "If you could maybe change into a pony or something before you go, that'd be great. I don't want anypony to panic thinking you came from the Everfree Forest or something." She 'suggested', though it was really more of a demand.

I shrugged and quickly turned on my heel, becoming a whirl of color. When the living twister slowed down, there was a blue Pegasus stallion with a blonde mane standing there. "Better?" I asked.

"Yes, much better." Twilight replied, sounding pleased.

I then turned and walked out of the library, heading towards Fluttershy's cottage. I decided not to fly though, feeling like it would be a good idea to actually learn how to use my wings before trying them out. I don't want to end up making a ditch with my face like season 4 Twilight did while practicing for the Sun Celebration ceremony after all.

Once I reached the cottage, I stopped at the door. Raising a hoof to knock, I hesitated. Fluttershy is always shy around new ponies, what if she's too scared to talk to me?

Then I grinned as an idea came to me. With a small spin and a little tornado, I became a small cat. A Cheshire cat to be exact. I slowly faded from view, my smile being the last thing to disappear.

After walking through the wall with my intangibility, I found Fluttershy in the kitchen. Grinning again, I walked up behind her. I managed to quickly compose my face into a neutral cat expression before becoming visible again. I put the book Twilight had given me earlier under my left paw, before gently tapping my right paw against her leg with a small meow.

Looking down, Fluttershy noticed me almost immediately. "Hmm? Who are you little one?" She asked softly, bending down to examine me.

I said nothing and simply patted the book under my paw. "Oh? Is that for me?" She asked, noticing the book. I gave a little nod, still staying in my character of a 'normal cat'. Fluttershy then pat me gently upon the head before picking up the book, setting it onto the counter-top nearest to us. "Equestria's top 15 salad recipes? Oh this is the library book I checked out, I've been looking everywhere for it!" Fluttershy said excitedly, which is to say that she was speaking in what would be a normal indoor voice for anypony else.

"Oh thank you, I thought I'd left this behind at the library and Angel was a bit upset by it... Did Twilight send you?" Fluttershy asked.

Here it is, the moment I've been hoping for... I allowed a grin to practically split my face before letting out a somewhat deep, "Eeyup!"

Fluttershy let out a little "eep!" and froze, staring at me with wide disbelieving eyes. I happily used this attention to pull my little disappearing trick again, allowing my grin to fade last.

Fluttershy blinked twice before falling over. To be honest, I kinda expected her to faint and used my literally cat-like reflexes and speed to catch her head with a pillow before it could hit the floor.

"Well now that the chore's are done, it's time to play!" I thought to myself, grinning widely as I walked out, or rather through, the door.

As I walked around the edges of Ponyville, I heard what sounded like laughter in the Apple orchard to my right. Apple Bloom maybe? I decided it couldn't hurt to drop in and check it out.

After a bit of a walk through the trees I came across the 'Cutie Mark Crusaders' Club. "At least now I definitely know that the timeline is past the Show Stoppers episode." I mumbled, looking at the fixed up clubhouse. Apple Bloom would make a great carpenter...

"Hey!"

I looked around after hearing the agitated exclamation and saw the three crusading fillies standing in a clearing, staring down Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon. Joy... Wait! Maybe I could use this to my advantage? With that in mind, I allowed my 'Cheshire Grin' to stretch my face as I walked towards the three.

"Blank Flank, Blank Flank!" I could hear the two bullies chanting as I finally reached the group, standing right next to Apple Bloom. Perfect.

Diamond Tiara noticed me first, bumping an elbow into Silver Spoon to get her attention. "Hey, whose cat is that?" she asked, pointing at me. The Cutie Mark Crusaders, whom I shall begin to simply call the CMC for the sake of a smaller mouthful, looked at me as well.

"That's not my cat..." Sweetie Belle replied, confused "After all it's definitely not Opal, she's white. I don't think I've ever heard of a cat that has blue stripes and blonde fur..."

"And it's definitely not mine; I don't have a pet" Scootaloo added.

"And Applejack has Winona, so cats are a big 'no go'..." Apple Bloom finished.

"Well it's not like that mangy thing belongs to either of us, it definitely looks like something a Blank Flank would own though!" Diamond Tiara laughed.

"Mangy? Excuse you but I happen to be very well groomed, thank you very much!" I replied indignantly, speaking in a very fake and stereotypical British accent. "Now what's all this about Blanks and Flanks?" I asked, acting like I didn't know what they were talking about.

"Did that cat just...?" Sweetie Belle asked. The other two crusaders could only nod their heads, surprise written all over their muzzles.

"Er..." Diamond Tiara began intelligently, seeming at a loss of words. "T-they don't have any cutie marks..." She managed to explain, trailing off at the end.

I raised a brow, acting surprised. "Is that all?" I asked, padding over to stand next to Diamond Tiara. Thinking of the Absolute Thievery ability, I had an idea. I just hope I can reverse this later if need be... Reaching over with my paw, I touched the Tiara shaped picture on her rump before making a grabbing motion and pulling my paw away.

In front of their disbelieving eyes, the Cutie Mark came away with my paw as if it was a simple sticker. I allowed my Cheshire grin to stretch my face once more, looking at the two spoiled fillies.

"There, now your Flanks match..." I commented before pulling my disappearing trick once more. This caused both of them to run away from the clearing, screaming about 'Cutie Mark Demons'

Once the two spoiled fillies disappeared from sight I broke down laughing, letting myself fade back into visibility once more. "T-their faces, oh man the look on their faces!" I gasped out.

Managing to calm down a bit, I turned back to the CMC who back away quickly. Sensing the tension in the air, I raised a paw. "Hey Apple Bloom, how're you doing?" I asked, smiling slightly. I didn't allow this grin to split my face like the others though, since that probably would've seemed pretty creepy.

All three of them blinked before Apple Bloom looked a little closer at me, scrutinizing the blonde fur. "John?" She asked.

I allowed my grin to stretch just a tad bit wider, "The one and only!" I replied, standing on two legs and making an exaggerated bow. That statement is technically true. I doubt I'll ever run into another 'John' in Equestria after all.

"What happened to ya? Why do you look like that? And how'd you do that!?" Apple Bloom fired off rapidly, wanting to find out what she could.

"I can shape-shift, and it's a secret respectively." I replied, turning on my heel and ending up looking like a pegasus colt with a blonde mane and a blue coat.

"Wow, ah didn't know he-yoo-muns could do stuff like that!" Apple Bloom exclaimed.

I smiled sheepishly, rubbing the back of my neck with a fore-hoof "Well... Normally they can't. I'm sort of an oddball, I guess." I replied before pointing at the two fillies behind her. "Now then, are you going to introduce me to your friends?" I asked curiously.

"Oh, yeah! Girls, this here's John! I found him in the orchard yesterday, apparently he got lost." She told the two girls, jerking a hoof towards me. It took a conscious effort to keep the powers of the 'Hide-behind from activating as the young Earth Pony stepped in front of me. Turning to me, she continued the introductions. "John, this is Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo." Apple Bloom informed me, pointing at the Unicorn and Pegasus fillies respectively.

"What's a he-yoo-mun?" Sweetie Belle asked curiously.

"Well, we look a bit like tailless and mostly hairless monkeys. The only hair we have is on our head, and occasionally a bit of it will grow on our bodies."

"But you look like a pony to me..." Scootaloo piped up.

Looking at her, I smiled. "I also looked like a cat just a few minutes ago." I reminded her. She looked a bit sheepish after that. "Like I said just a bit ago, I can shape-shift." I demonstrated this power by spinning and first turning into Apple Bloom, then Sweetie Belle, followed by Scootaloo, after which I looked like Twilight, and I finally ended it by turning into a Blank-Flanked Diamond Tiara before changing back into my blue-and-yellow colt self.

"Wow!" Scootaloo exclaimed, "That's so awesome! Almost as awesome Rainbow Dash..." She finished, her little wings buzzing slightly with excitement.

I smirked slightly before spinning again, "I'm pretty sure I'm about 20% cooler, actually..." I stated in the likeness of Rainbow Dash, smug grin and all. Changing myself back I chuckled slightly, "It was nice to meet you, but I'm gonna head out now. I'm sure you've got some crusading to do anyways..." I said, walking back towards Ponyville.

I'm sure that there's plenty more fun to be had where that came from after all. Maybe I could try and find Lyra? If she really is obsessed with hands, I could probably use my Cheshire abilities to make floating hands appear in front of her now and then... I couldn't help it, I laughed at the mental image of Lyra chasing after floating hands. This is going to be fun.

Ch 3: Obsessive Unicorns and Crazy Humans

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Lyra carefully snuck closer and closer towards her prey, she could practically smell victory at hoof... Tensing her powerful pony muscles she quickly pounced with a loud battle-cry, "HAAANNNDDSSS~!!!"

Chuckling quietly, I jerked my hands away from the windowsill they had been resting on, allowing the mint green unicorn to land herself a face full of pie. I brought my hands up to my mouth, attempting to stifle the laughter that was shaking the rest of my currently invisible body.

Lyra quickly stood back up, turning to face her prey with a glare. "Why won't you just stand still!?" She yelled at me.

The hilarity of the situation was too much for me, and I broke down. Clutching my sides I laughed hysterically, slowly fading into view as I stopped consciously maintaining my invisibility.

Lyra's jaw dropped as she watched me fade into view, before a large grin grew upon her muzzle. "I knew it!" She cried out joyfully, bouncing around my laughing form. "I knew it, I knew it, I knew it! Humans are real!"

Hearing that last sentence helped me get a hold on myself, reeling my laughter back in. I glanced down at myself and sure enough, I was visible. "Darn it..." I muttered. I quickly began to fade from view again.

Noticing what I was doing, Lyra quickly launched herself at my disappearing body. "Where so you think you're going?" She demanded, attaching herself to my torso "You are coming with me to prove to Bon-Bon that I'm NOT crazy!"

I simply gave her a wide grin and went intangible, allowing her to drop to the floor. The unicorn quickly shook the metaphorical cobwebs from her head before turning towards the sky, "I WILL FIND YYOOOUUU~!!!" She screamed.

"Lyra, what are you doing now?" Her friend Bon-Bon asked, exasperated.

"I found a human, but he escaped!" Lyra explained excitedly, "You've gotta help me find him!"

Bon-Bon simply shook her head, "Oh Lyra, everypony knows humans are a myth. Just accept it and move on... Preferably towards the candy shop." - The earth pony narrowed her eyes - "Where you're supposed to be working the register."

"Fine..." Lyra said before walking towards the candy shop, lest she incur the wrath of her best friend. Though the green pony took a glance back at where she saw the human, narrowing her eyes. "This isn't over..." She thought with determination.

I looked around for something to do now that my little game of 'cat and mouse', or 'Lyra and Hands' in this case, was interrupted. Just then I noticed a prismatic blur flying over the fields of Ponyville. A mischievous smile spread itself onto my face as I realized that the next target for my pranks would be the one and only Rainbow Dash...


Arriving at the field where I last saw the blur, I noticed tank sitting on a hill watching his owner. He wasn't even wearing his helicopter stuff, which was odd. Though now I also know that the timeline is also past the 'May the Best Pet win' episode, so that's good.

I quickly snuck up next to Tank and examined the tortoise to check for anything that might make him more unique. As far as I could tell, the flight goggles he wore were the only things truly differentiating him from any other tortoise.

I couldn't help but grin as an idea popped into my head. I've noticed that I have been grinning a lot lately... I'll chalk it up to the Cheshire in me. I quickly spun on my heel, discreetly turning into an almost exact copy of Tank before becoming visible again.

Rainbow landed not even a minute later, her eyes closed as she began to boast. "So whaddya think Tank, it's pretty awesome right? I'm sure to get into the Wonderbolts soon!" Then she opened her eyes to look at her pet...

Rainbow ended up doing a double take, seeing two Tanks. "What? Tank do you have like, a twin brother or something?" She asked, though I wasn't sure which of us she was directing the question towards.

I decided to mess with her a bit more, and began to walk forward. But instead of Tank's crawl, I moved more along the speed of Opal which caused Rainbow's eyes to bulge. Taking it a step further, I began utilizing another of my Cheshire abilities to begin walking onto the air.

"Okay am I dreaming, or is there a tortoise walking in the air?" Rainbow asked, seeming very shocked and confused.

"Not a dream, I can tell you that much!" I chirped once I managed to reach a point where I was about face level.

The Prismatic Pegasus's eyes narrowed, "What are you?"

"Why, I'm not surprised you don't know..." I answered, whirling into the shape of my pegasus form. "Discord and the Changelings are likely some of the only other beings in Equestria who can change shape after all..." I mused.

"So if you're not Discord... And you aren't a Changeling... What exactly ARE you?" Rainbow demanded, poking her hoof into my chest.

I waved a hoof to indicate myself, making my eyes widen in false disbelief, "Me? Why, I'm just your average pegasus pony..." I replied to the rainbow-maned mare, who just responded with a deadpan stare.

I shrugged, "Okay, so I'm not a pegasus... Well, I am right now... But... Oh, you know what I mean!" I exclaimed, exasperated by my own inability to explain myself. "I'm a..." Here I paused in thought. After all, I didn't really need to tell the truth to her. Heck, I didn't even have a reason to say anything...

"I'm the Pony of Shadows!" I lied, making some ghostly noises while rearing up on my back legs and moving my forelegs around.

Rainbow raised a brow before hovering above the ground and crossing her arms, "Oh yeah?" She asked, "Prove it."

I allowed myself to land on all four hooves again, smirking. "Alright," I replied confidently, "Try to touch me." I challenged, activating my intangibility.

The flying pony looked at me skeptically before landing. She then walked over to stand next to me before attempting to slug me in the shoulder.

I couldn't help but laugh as she lost her balance due to a lack of the resistance that had been expected and fell flat on her face. "You're hilarious Rainbow Dash!" I told the pegasus, still chuckling as she stood up and brushed herself off.

The mare glared at me, but didn't attack. Smart choice since she would've just went through me again... Raising a hoof, I waved at her. "Well, it's been fun but I've got places to go and ponies to prank!" I said, evaporating into a mist that floated back towards Ponyville. I've got an idea that I'm just dying to try out next...


I had changed back into my original human form a few minutes ago, but continued to walk through the skies above Ponyville. Looking around, I noticed something glinting near the Everfree Forest. Bored as I was, I didn't think twice before making my way towards the area.

I made it to the Everfree a few minutes later with my enhanced speed. Stepping back onto the ground, I looked around for the object that had caught my attention and spotted it near a tree.

Walking over, I picked up the object for examination. It appeared to be some sort of crystal... But why would there be a- I had to abandon the crystal, and my musings, to dodge the objects I heard whizzing through the air. The Cheshire Cat's abilities are proving to be invaluable so far...

Looking around the area, I noticed a black silhouette walking towards me. Whatever it was, it was definitely bipedal. It almost looked like a human but that couldn't be true, right...?

"Well done, well done!" The figure called jovially, clapping his hands as he walked into the light. It was a human, a human male with wild black hair and a pair of steam-punk goggles hanging around his neck. He was also wearing a Victorian era suit, so he must really like steampunk...

"What the hell! Are you trying to kill me!?" I yelled at the guy, shaking my fist. You can't tell me you wouldn't be mad too, the guy just tried to impale me... With... Crystals... Oh no, don't tell me. "You... Doctor Labcoat guy gave you some kind of powers too? Why try to kill me with them!?"

The man laughed, "Oh of course I have powers, Tier 5 to be exact." He replied easily. "As to why I'd kill you" - He shrugged - "I felt like it. You may call me Baron Umbra, not that it'll matter for long. Though before I kill you, would you give me the pleasure of telling me your name and Tier?"

"Umbra? So you do something with the shadows or something? And my Tier? What the heck does that mean!?" I shouted at the guy, completely confused by his babbling.

Umbra sighed, "I suppose I can do the mercy of explaining it to you before you die..." He replied, "There are 6 tiers. Tier 1 allows you three random powers. Tier 2 allows you 3 random powers and the choice to remove one for a potentially better, but still random, power. Tier 3 would allow you five powers. Tier 4 also allows for five but also allows you to choose up to three that you don't like and wish to re-roll, so to speak. Tier 5 allows for five, followed by the chance for up to three 're-rolls', followed by one last chance for a single 're-roll'." He explained before allowing a slightly crazed smile to cross his face.

"And the final Tier... Tier Ex, also known as the Experimental Tier, allows for much the same as Tier 1 with a few major differences... In any of the previous Tiers, you are not allowed an 'Omni' power nor does it allow any power that is the ultimate version of it's kind... But with the Ex Tier you are allowed any power, anything at all, except for three: Omnipotence, Omnicide, and Omniscience." Umbra finished his explanation with a look of longing.

"I do wish I could've gotten something like that, but oh well... I got my five powers, though for some reason one does seems to be in its ultimate form! Darkness Manipulation!" He laughed maniacally for a few minutes before calming himself. "I suppose it was a simple oversight on their part, though perhaps not. Either way, that ability along with my Blood Constructs, Crystal Manipulation, as well as my Lunar and Solar Embodiments pretty much ensures my victory. Now that I have explained the Tier System, tell me the information that I have requested."

I looked at the guy like he was a complete idiot, which he kind of was. I mean I could understand him telling me about the Tier system I guess. But then he seriously went on and just told me all of his powers? What an idiot, kinda like one of those stereotypical one-off or 'doomed-to-fail' villains from some morning cartoon... I guess I'll humor the guy a bit though.

"My name is John, and if I had to pick a title for myself..." I thought about that for a second. "Well, I suppose I'll have to think about that for a few day-"

"Think about it?" Umbra laughed, "I doubt you'll live long enough to care. Now hurry up and tell me the Tier you received so I can kill you!"

I have that 'Absolute' Thievery, so I must be... Oh this is too good... I smiled at him, allowing my grin to quite literally split my face. "Experimental Tier." I replied simply, reveling in his reaction.

The supposed Baron stumbled a bit in shock before regaining his composure. "You're bluffing!" He shouted, "I don't believe you, and you can just die with your lies!" Having said that, Umbra brought his arms up and began to launch crystals at me from his palms.

I simply became intangible as my tail began to flick from side to side. Wait... When did my tail get there? Oh well, I guess it doesn't really matter.

I began to slowly stalk towards Umbra with a predatory grin, watching as he continued shooting crystals through me. Eventually, once I was about 20 feet away and closing in, he seemed to realize that his crystals weren't doing anything and switched tactics.

Lowering his arms, Umbra attempted to blend into the shadows. Once he was far enough into the shadows, they appeared to come to life. I could still see him though since he was obscured by darkness, but didn't merge with it. I wonder why... Maybe he couldn't? Maybe he was new to his powers as well?

My feline-enhanced eyes pierced through the darkness of the shadows easily. It's too bad he's so weak, I was expecting much more than this...

The shadow-whips attacked, crashing through me ineffectually. I know it's a bit cheap when you can turn intangible, but in a life-or-death battle... I wasn't going to play fair, especially not with my food.

That gave me pause. When did I start thinking of Umbra as food? Was this the Cheshire part of me or the Greed embodiment of the Absolute Thievery talking...?

"Ack!" I grunted as a shadow dug into my shoulder before retreating, my lapse in concentration causing me to become tangible again. It doesn't matter; I can worry about my abilities affecting my thoughts after this is over. I quickly forced myself to become intangible again as the whips renewed their attack.

"You see! It's only a matter of time before I kill you!" Umbra gloated, having caused a rather large gash to my left arm. "Your arm is heavily injured, and soon you will die!"

I'm starting to get annoyed by this guy... Feeling like it would be best to finish this quickly, rather than play with my food some more- ...Yeah; I've really got to sort out my thoughts after this. Anyways, I quickly rushed the guy and turned my hands tangible enough to grab his shoulders.

"No! Hey, get off of me!" Umbra shouted in panic, struggling in my grip. I don't know why he didn't use his powers, and I didn't care. In fact, I hardly even noticed.

The second I grabbed the guy, I lost focus on the world around me. Then I heard something, a voice. The feeling I got from it was the weirdest thing too... It felt very sinister and malevolent, but only to the world around us. To me it felt like the presence was welcoming me home kindly, giving off an aura of benevolence that it seemed to reserve for me and only me. Whatever it was... It whispered to me, speaking brokenly. Mostly conveying intents and ideas, with only a few words, "Eat... steal... take... mine... yours... ours... keep..."

Absently following a sense of direction from the voice, I felt myself raise my still clenched hands away from Umbra, an odd vapor following my movements. The second that it all appeared to have left the still struggling Baron, he collapsed. He was still alive though, I could hear him breathing.

I watched as the oddly solid smoky substance condensed into a ball, fascinated by it. I turned it this way and that, examining it like a child would a new toy. "Eat... yours... ours... use... keep..."

Following my instincts, I raised the ball up to my mouth and popped it inside. I chewed for a few moments, sampling the odd texture and flavor. It tasted like copper, which was odd... The texture was weird too: dry and slimy with something crunchy, something similar to salt, here and there. Half of the substance was cold, and the other was hot. I quickly swallowed, scared that I might burn my tongue.

"Ours." The voice said once more, a rush of images flying in front of my eyes. They were a bit fragmented and broken, with some other information filling my brain. It seemed to be mostly about the powers that 'Umbra' had used...


I walked absently through Ponyville, processing what had just happened. A lot of ponies were off to the side, staring, pointing, and chatting. I didn't really think about why they were until Lyra jumped in front of me. Glancing down, I noticed I was still in my natural form...

"I've got you now!" Lyra shouted, "You and your hands will be mine!" The green unicorn yelled, launching herself at me.

I jumped, easily clearing the unicorn, and landed on the air above her.

Lyra landed and turned around, looking around confused until she spotted me lounging around on the air. She stomped a hoof, "Get back down here!" The mare demanded, glaring at you.

Raising an eyebrow at the angry pony, I stayed still just long enough to give her my thoughts on that particular request - "How about... No." - before running quickly towards Twilight's library. As I ran, I allowed myself to get closer and closer to the ground until I hit it and kept running.

Risking a glance behind me, I saw that Lyra was hot on my heels. I turned back, spotting the library in front of me and making a beeline for the door. Lyra followed, of course.

As I neared the door, Lyra must have thought she had me. I based this assumption off the fact that she yelled, "I HAVE YOU NOW!" At me. But the unicorn didn't know one important fact. Knowledge of this important fact would've saved her a lot of pain and trouble, as well as the health of her nose.

I quickly used my intangibility to dive through the door, stopping for a moment as a somewhat satisfying *THUD!* came from the other side. I faded out of sight, just in case she decided to try and open the door to continue her pursuit.

Twilight trotted towards the door, probably assuming somepony had simply knocked on it rather than ran into it at full speed. She opened the door with a polite, "Yes?" to find Lyra sitting on her plot- heh... plot- and rubbing her nose with a hoof.

"Where is he?" She asked furiously. Uh-oh...

"Where is who?" Twilight replied, raising a brow in confusion.

"The Human! I saw him run in here!" The mint-green mare responded.

Twilight began to sweat a bit, nervously tapping her hooves together. "Human? What human?" She said, glancing every which way other than at Lyra. I silently face palmed at Twilight's horrible lying abilities. "There's no human here!"

"Oh yeah? Why are you so nervous then?" Lyra asked, squinting suspiciously at the Element of Magic.

Deciding to help Twilight out a bit, especially seeing as I caused this in the first place, I walked up the stairs. Once out of Lyra's line of sight, I removed my invisibility. After a quick spin, I was a pony once again though with a few obvious differences from my usual pony form. Well... One major difference. I was a unicorn this time, I figured it would be a good idea to try to pass myself off as having been here studying with Twilight. Seems believable.

Trotting back down the stairs, I walked up to the two unicorn mares. "Hey Twilight, what's going on? I thought we were going to study a bit more theory next?" I said, hoping that she would understand what I was trying to do

Twilight glanced at me in confusion, apparently the fact that I was a unicorn made me look that much different...

"Oh, I see why you're so nervous now..." Lyra commented with a smirk, nudging Twilight in the ribs. "Way to go Twilight, I guess I'd better leave you two alone." She quickly trotted off.

"What! Wait, Lyra it's not like that!" Twilight yelled after the human-obsessed unicorn, seeming very embarrassed if the blush on her cheeks was anything to go by. Lyra was already out of earshot though...

"Well that went pretty well, I think." I commented, watching Lyra's retreating form.

"Ugh!" Twilight huffed, stomping a hoof and slamming the door shut with her magic. "Who are you exactly?" she asked, turning to me with a frown.

"Aww... You don't recognize me? I didn't think I would look quite that different as a unicorn than I did as a pegasus..." I replied, sounding disappointed. I even laid my ears back and looked at the floor before scuffing it slightly with a hoof, mentally patting myself on the back for the performance.

"John?" Twilight asked, a bit hesitantly.

I grinned and, in a quick movement that caught her off guard, pulled her into a big hug. "You do remember me!" I said, acting over-dramatically relieved. "I was so worried!" Twilight blushed as she pushed against my embrace before finally giving up and simply teleporting her way out.

She was still blushing slightly from the unexpected contact, though now she had a frown on her face. Unfortunately for her, the blush made it much less intimidating than she might have wanted.

I couldn't help but tease her about that though and commented, "You look adorable when you blush, Twilight." Her face lit up like a Christmas tree and the spell she had begun to charge dissipated, guess that must have thrown her for a loop...

*Knock Knock* "H-hello..? Um... Twilight? Are you there? If you're not, that's okay. I just..." That must be Fluttershy, based on what I'm hearing.

Twilight quickly ran over and opened the door for her friend, desperate to distract herself from having to deal with me. "Hi Fluttershy, can I help you with something?" She asked.

"O-oh, um... Yes, if it's not to much trouble that is..." The pegasus pony glanced behind Twilight and shrunk into herself upon seeing me, an unfamiliar pony, in the background.

You know... The Cheshire cat was able to take his head off, I wonder if I can too? Worth a try at least.

I sat down before taking two hooves to my head and attempting to lift. My head came off pretty easily actually, so I turned it around in my hooves to look at the rest of me. Ah! Idea....

I rolled my head over towards the two ponies at the door, my body sprawling across the ground while my head came to a stop in front of Twilight's legs. "Eep!" Fluttershy cried before fainting at the sight of a 'beheaded' pony.

Twilight looked at my head in shock, which was quickly followed by an annoyed deadpan once I began to laugh. She did a face-hoof as I collected my head, putting it back onto my body.

"Really John? Really....?" She asked me with a raised eyebrow.

I shrugged, "Sorry Twilight, just experimenting with my powers a bit..." Having said my excuse, I turned towards a shadow in the corner and began to concentrate on it. "Come on, come on..." Success! A small tendril of shadow was now waving at me.

Well, I think that's enough for one day! I headed up to the guest bed, falling asleep as soon as my head hit the pillow.

Ch 4: I bug Royalty, or In which I annoy Sunbutt

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I groaned as the sun began to glare into my face. Lifting an arm, I waved it in a dismissive gesture, "I'm too tired for it to be day, so just go away Sunlight..." I moaned in annoyance. Surprisingly, I no longer felt the Sun shining on my eyelids...

Opening my eyes and sitting up, I saw that it was night outside. "Man, I can see all of the stars... Night in Equestria is awesome." I mumbled to myself, staring at the night sky which had stars twinkling like many diamonds.

Unfortunately, the big gaseous ball of light ruined this a minute later as it rose over the horizon. I glared at the large fiery object and wished it would just leave so that I could look at the night sky in peace, and to my shock... The Sun actually began to quickly backtrack as if scared.

Wide-eyed, I attempted to will the Sun back up. Once again, it began to rise into the sky.

-Flashback-

"... As well as my Lunar and Solar Embodiments..."

-Flashback End-

Solar and Lunar Embodiments? So... I have control over the Sun and Moon? Oh I know at least two or three ponies who wouldn't be thrilled over this. The two princesses especially! After all, technically I might have more control over the two objects than they do...

I mean, thinking back to hearths warming eve... The story stated that the unicorns used to swap the moon and the sun all the time! Albeit, it took like ten of them to do it... But while Sunbutt and Luna might raise and lower them as their special talent, that doesn't necessarily mean they have an actual connection to them. And as an 'Embodiment' of the Solar and Lunar variety, I might've just beat them in controlling their own elements!

...Nah! They've got way more experience on their side after all. But it'll still be fun to mess with them! Quickly I began to test the limits of my new found power. Though I wonder whether Celestia or Twilight would be more annoyed by my control of the Sun...?


Twilight yawned as she woke up, "That was a good sleep..." She muttered, stretching out before heading to the mirror to brush her mane.

Once her normal morning activities had been completed, Twilight decided to check on John. "Hopefully he doesn't cause a big mess today..." The unicorn thought with a severe amount of exasperation, remembering the two incidents she was actually involved in yesterday.

Poking her head into the guest room, she observed as I stared intently out the window. "Hi John... What are you doing?" She asked, walking into the room. Maybe it was a human thing...?

"Juggling." I replied shortly, still staring at the sky.

"Juggling? Juggling what?" Twilight asked in confusion, not seeing how he could possibly be juggling by sitting on a bed and staring out the window.

"Take a look." I told the curious purple pony, not wanting to break my concentration to explain it.

Twilight trotted over to the window and glanced up to where my head was facing before quickly stumbling back in shock. "W-w-what! You- I- but- it just... WHAT!" The mare managed to get out as her brain began to overload.

I paid little attention to the thump behind me, stopping just long enough to snicker lightly before continuing to play cat and mouse with the large space objects.


By the time Twilight woke up, I was gone. I'd gotten bored and simply let the Sun and Moon sit side by side before leaving the Library in my cat form. A few minutes after I dropped my control, the Moon retreated over the horizon.

Oh, now what do we have here? I'm currently looking at the home of one of the few members of the Mane Six I haven't messed with... Rarity!

I quickly spun, changing my form only slightly. Now I was wearing a cat-tuxedo, which was interesting. I expected that to be much more uncomfortable than it is... I began to run through the list of the ponies I've messed with, and those that I planned to mess with as I walked into the Boutique.

Let's see... I've messed with: Fluttershy, Diamond Tiara, Silver Spoon, Rainbow Dash, Lyra, Twilight, Fluttershy again, Luna, and Sunbutt. I still plan to mess with Applejack, and I'm currently about to mess with Rarity. I think I'll leave Pinkie alone, since she's my favorite pony...

I heard a meow to my right and looked over to see Opal rubbing her head against my side. Yeah... I'm just gonna 'Nnope!' my way outta this situation. Walking away quickly, I began to look for Rarity.


Finally! I found Rarity in the very last place I looked, though admittedly I should've checked here first, which was her 'Inspiration Room'. I was a bit annoyed, and it didn't help that Opal was following me around like some stalker fan-girl...

I began to look around at the 'Organized Disaster' as I padded into the room, though I had to look quickly since Opal was making me a bit uncomfortable. About a minute after I walked in, Rarity noticed Opal and grabbed her in a magical grip.

"Oh my darling Opal, whatever are you doing in here? Did you come to help me with my latest design?" The unicorn asked with a smile before noticing me. "Hm? A tuxedo on a cat...?" She mumbled. Suddenly she reared up with a large smile, "Idea~!" She practically sang.

As she was doing that, I grabbed a gem off the ground. It happened to be a sapphire, which is pretty awesome for a couple reasons. For example: it's not only my birth stone, but it's also my favorite color!

Rarity noticed me holding the stone and stopped to observe me, no doubt wondering why a cat would be holding a gem. But this sapphire is way too small to be the birth stone of someone as awesome as I am... Wait! I probably have that Crystal control thing from Umbra-guy, maybe I could make it bigger?

Looking at the gem in my paw, I began to attempt to assert my will over it. Annoyingly, nothing seemed to happen... And then Rarity seemed to have decided that I didn't need the crystal anymore and took her sapphire back. I glared at her as she gazed back at me with amusement before turning away to work a bit more.

I want my sapphire back, darn it! It's shiny! Wishing I had a large sapphire, I watched in shock as one seemed to drop out of my palm. I looked at the stone, and the stone did nothing. I tilted my head in slight confusion at the sapphire before trying to making it grow. Then it did what I wanted, it actually grew! The little sapphire went from about the size of a button to the size of a throw pillow in the span of five seconds.

Now that is more deserving of being my birthstone! I decided to name my creation a Sky Gem, since it's definitely much bigger and better than any other sapphire I've ever seen.

My moment of triumph was short lived however, as Rarity quickly snatched the gem from me to begin examining it. I glared at her while she studied my Sky Gem.

"I-I don't believe it! This Sapphire is the biggest I've ever seen... But where did it come from, I know I never dug this up..." The unicorn said to herself, checking for any flaws in the stone.

I glared at her before sighing and rolling a different sapphire over to myself, deciding that it wouldn't be worth blowing my cover to take back the Sky Gem. I could always make more after all, and I still have to find a way to prank her. Wet her mane? Nah, too simple...

Absentmindedly, I began to make a chess set out of Sapphire. I rolled over some small sapphires and a couple of emeralds before reshaping them for my purposes; I was soon left with everything but the board. Growing a small shard of diamond out of my paw, I plucked it out before expanding and shaping it into a chessboard.

I began to play against myself while thinking about how to prank the prissy pony, not realizing that Ms. Marshmallow had watched me make the whole thing. That... Was a mistake.

She didn't even need to try and piece things together either, since she watched me performing my little geomancy stunt. I shouldn't have been so careless, nor should I have experimented with this power in front of somepony... Especially not this pony.

I was shocked out of my thoughts of pranking as Rarity picked me up and spun me around in a hug, nuzzling her cheek against mine. "You can make gems!" She cried out happily. "Oh this is amazing! A gem-making cat with a sense of style, simply wonderful!"

She dropped me onto a pillow before running off to grab something out of a chest. Trotting back to the pillow, Rarity put a ruby in front of me, "Can you make more of these, please~?" She requested, batting her eyelashes at me.

Rolling my eyes, I decided to humor her. I held out a paw as a Ruby began to grow out of it before dropping to the floor as it reached a similar size to the one in front of me. I repeated the process a few more times to get used to it; the feeling of a gem growing from your paw is really weird...

I don't know why she looked so surprised though, it's just a ruby...

"I don't believe it, four perfectly formed Fire Rubies..." She mumbled to herself, examining the copies I had made.

My ears perked up a bit at what she said though... Fire rubies? Were those rare? Wait! Okay, now I know where I recognize the term, that was the gem that Spike gave to Rarity in 'Secret of my Excess'... So yeah, I guess it must be kinda rare.

Okay, now Rarity is looking at me in a way that's kinda scary... I don't want to jump to conclusions, but she definitely seems to be thinking of something other than just fashion... Okay she's probably thinking of fashion, but I have a sinking feeling it involves me.

I started walking towards the door and to my chagrin, the unicorn followed me. "Where are you going darling? Are you hungry, perhaps? Maybe you could stay here..." The Fashionista suggested.

I paused and looked back at the pony and her pet. I glanced at Opal, who was looking at me with her tail flicking back and forth before turning my gaze to Rarity, who seemed slightly desperate for me to answer in the positive. I glanced between the two for a minute, until Opal seemed to give me a small smile...

I bolted. I was scared, and I'm not going to deny it. That cat scared the hay outta me. As I ran from the Boutique, I could hear Rarity's calls for me to come back and some hoof-steps as she tried to follow.


I came to a stop in a familiar environment, finding myself back in the orchard where I woke up. By now I was feeling a bit hungry and considering I was surrounded by apples, it was pretty easy to tell why my stomach began to growl at me.

I quickly turned myself into an earth pony and wandered for a bit, trying to ignore my growling stomach. I may be tricky and a bit mischievous, but I'd feel really guilty if I ate the Apples apples without paying... Now somepony I don't know anything about? But I don't think I'd be comfortable cheating Applejack and, more importantly, Apple Bloom.

Just the thought of the adorable little filly catching me stealing apples, her eyes big as she asked what I was doing, caused my eyes to widen and my stomach to stop growling. I couldn't do that to an innocent filly like Applebloom. I wouldn't do something like that. Exposing Apple Bloom, or any other foal for that matter, to crime would be.... Really bucking bad.

As I wandered around, I heard what was likely to be the sound of somepony bucking the apple tree. I began to head towards the sound, and it began to grow louder. Eventually, I broke the tree line to see a shower of apples cascading into the buckets.

"'Scuse me partner, but is there something ah could help ya with?" I heard Applejack ask. "'Cause I have a lot of work to do, and while I don't want to be rude, this here is private property."

"Oh, uh..." I thought about it for a second before realizing something... I don't have any bits! No bits means no apples! "I guess I'm just looking around for a job. I just arrived in Ponyville recently and don't really have any money."

Applejack raised a brow before walking around me, examining me carefully. "Ya look fit enough... Do ya know how ta buck an apple tree?" She asked. I guess she must've learned her lesson about allowing others to help from the whole 'Applebuck season' and 'Super Speedy Cider Squeezy' incidents.

"No, but I'd be willing to learn." I replied easily, deciding to attempt to seize this opportunity. Mentally, I crossed Applejack from my 'Prank list'. Never a good idea to prank your boss after all... Unless it's Rainbow Dash or Pinkie, since they seemed like they wouldn't mind too much... Mostly Pinkie.

Applejack nodded before prodding my leg and then squeezing it. I yelped, backpedalling slightly in surprise. "What the hay are you doing!?" I asked with a voice slightly louder than I meant to use. I'm going to go ahead and chalk it up to shock.

"Ahm just making sure ya got the leg muscles for the job." The orange mare replied simply. "Follow me an' ah'll show ya how to buck an apple tree."

I quickly followed the country pony, watching as she demonstrated the proper technique before she brought me to another tree to try my hoof at applebucking.

My potential boss suggested that I strike with everything I could. I looked at the tree, brought my legs back while balancing on my fore-hooves, and struck as hard as I could.

There was the sound of many apples falling before a large *Crack* resounded through the area. Slowly the tree began to fall over, uprooting itself along the way.

Applejack and I stared in shock, "Did I do that?"

The country mare shook herself out of her stupor and turned to me, "If ya can pull your kicks back a bit, then yall can consider yerself hired." The orange mare told me.

I nodded before turning towards another tree and bringing up a single fore-hoof I smacked it against the tree with most of my strength, causing apples to rain down into the buckets and leaving the tree devoid of fruit.

"Yep, yer hired." Applejack decided, nodding her head. "You can start in about 4 days, come 'round the farm bright 'n early. I want ya to try an' be there 'round the time the sun comes up." I nodded and told her my name before I trotted back towards Ponyville.

"Mighty odd name that feller has..." The farm pony commented, trotting to another tree and continuing to work.


As I trotted back towards the library, I pondered on a few things. Things like my surprising amount of strength, as well as Rarity's apparently crazy gem insanity. Gem-sanity? In-gem-sanity? Meh, doesn't matter... The point is that she's really crazy for gems.

I wonder what else I'll be surprised by today. Noticing Twilight was standing outside the library, I did a quick spin into my original form before jogging towards her and calling out a greeting. Though I wonder why she's just standing outside?

Once Twilight saw me, her eyes widened in surprise and... Relief? I found myself quickly teleported next to her, wondering just what the buck was going on. As I re-oriented my senses to my new positioning, I noticed two things I probably shouldn't have been able to miss. Two things that made me kinda want to run for my bucking life. And unfortunately one thing stopped me from getting away... Magic.

Bucking magic, it just has to be a force of energy that has this really annoying ability to trap me even when I'm intangible. I should really look into a way to counter it or something...

"Is this the creature that you wrote about Twilight?" A large white pony with wings and a horn asked. Yep, that's right. It's Celestia, and I'm hoping to hay that I'm not screwed.

Twilight nodded and opened her mouth, but before she could begin to explain, she was interrupted.

"THOU DAREST TO CONTROL OUR MOON!? WHO IS THEE TO BELIEVE THEMSELVES WORTHY OF SUCH A THING?" Luna bellowed.

You know, even though she's probably going to blow out my eardrums soon... Actually that's okay, I can heal them. I'm okay. In fact I'm feeling awesome! My favorite princess is standing right in front of me! Albeit she's angry, but still!

After making sure I could hear properly again, I attempted to formulate a response. Noticing that Twilight dropped the magical field that prevented me from moving, probably due to a sudden loss of hearing, I set about doing what I felt was the best response. Well, the best response for me anyways...

I hugged her, which probably took the princess severely off guard. Fortunately, or unfortunately depending on your point of view, my mouth decided to move before I could think. "Luna! You are my favorite Princess, this is awesome and I can't believe I'm meeting you! I love your night, it's so amazing to see all the stars twinkling in the sky, not to mention the moon which always helps me feel so calm and peaceful!" I managed to get just about all that out in a single breath, after which I backed off a bit.

Yeah... I totally went into a fan-boy mode for a minute, definitely not one of the prouder moments of my life. I half expect her to attempt to have me thrown into the dungeons for something like this... Wait, I can't go to the dungeons! I still haven't met Pinkie Pie, I haven't tried to be a griffon yet, I haven't even attempted to turn into a dragon yet, not to mention tha- "Thank you." -at I...

"What?"

Luna seemed to compose herself for a moment, "We said thank you. Most do not seem to enjoy our night sky, and you are the first to have sought to complement us for it."

Well... Definitely better than the dungeons! Way better! "Well it is beautiful..." I replied, looking at the ground with a small amount of embarrassment and kind of wishing that I'd never opened my big mouth. "I'm sure you put a lot of work into it. The stars are always enjoyable to see and often times when I look at the Moon, I feel much calmer and more at peace." It wasn't necessarily the same Moon, but I don't think that detail matters much... "Not to mention the near silence of the night, the peaceful sense that everything is right with the world."

I looked up towards the two Alicorns to see two sights that I would never have expected. Luna was blushing, which was unexpected. It's always interesting to see a pony blush, since it's actually really, really visible through their coat. Though looking back on fanfictions I've read, I'm almost more surprised that I honestly didn't expect that to happen...

Celestia's reaction was the best though; it took all I had to keep a straight face. I didn't want Luna to think that what I told her was a joke or something after all. It was the truth, plain and simple.

Anyways, Bright-Bottom's jaw had dropped at some point, and I'm not sure when she planned to pick it back up. I coughed a bit to get their attention, allowing the Solar Princess a bit of time to dig her jaw back out of the ground.

"Sorry... I didn't mean to be so informal towards you, but it just kinda spilled out." I apologized, looking away from the night princess for a moment.

"'Tis not a problem er.... John, was it?" I nodded my head to the inquiry about my name. Luna nodded in affirmation, "'Tis not a problem John. We are glad to hear that thou dost appreciate our night to such a degree."

"But there is still the issue of why the Sun and Moon were flying around the sky earlier..." Sunbutt cut in, looking at me with a raised brow. "Twilight seems to suspect that you had something to do with this."

"Um... Yeah... sorry about that Princess, I was testing the extent of my abilities..." Darn it Light-Bottom, you pretty much ooze some kind of royal authority aura thingy! Do you know how hard it is to not tell you what's going on with that hovering over someone!? Ugh, now I've got to figure out a way around that too...

"Testing your abilities? You mean to say that you have enough magic to freely control the two celestial bodies to such an extent?" Luna asked, sounding shocked.

I will not laugh. I will not laugh. Heh, celestial bodies... DARN IT!

"Actually, I'm pretty sure I don't have any magic." I responded carefully, though that's probably for the best. Hopefully the lack of magic will make it harder for anypony, or changelings and draconequus for that matter, to counter.

"What? But you do have magic! I cast a Magic-sensing spell last night, and it told me you have at least half as much as Princess Celestia!" Twilight cried out, shocked at my response. A lot of shock going around lately... "How could you blatantly lie to the Princess like that?!" She shouted at me.

I was shocked too, wait... I really need to find another word to describe this, there's way to much shock going on around here... Flabbergasted. I was flabbergasted at the revelation that I have magic.

"Well excuse me Sparkles, but I've never used any of it!" I yelled back.

Princess Shining-Behind seemed to have an idea though, "Would you mind demonstrating your control over the Sun and Moon?" She requested.

I sighed and, rolling my eyes, willing the Moon to move up beside the Sun in the sky and pushing the Sun below the horizon and out of sight.

"Sister, did thy notice that as well?" Luna asked the taller Alicorn.

Solar Plot nodded, "Yes, I did. A complete lack of magic, just as he said..."

Heh, Solar Plot... Yeah, I don't have anything against Celestia, but it's just so much fun to mess with these little names. I can't call Luna anything like that, even in my head, since she's my favorite princess and all. So sorry Plot-Light, but you get the long end of the nickname stick. A long, long list shall be made! Or not; I'm feeling a bit too lazy to find some parchment, ink, and a quill just to write a nickname list...

There was a silence as the Two Princesses appeared to silently deliberate over things. "Uh... Is there anything else you needed?" I asked curiously, hoping that was all I had to worry about.

Celestia eyed me wearily but shook her head, "That is all for now, though we will be keeping an eye on you..." She seemed to want to say more, but instead simply flew off. I think she was annoyed to find out that someone could completely blow her off in favor of talking to her sister. I don't think she's had a lot of experience with being completely ignored by some seemingly random pony or creature...

Luna lingered a moment longer, eyeing me curiously. "Fare thee well John, we hope that thou shalt remain in good health." With her goodbyes said, she too flew off towards Canterlot.

Well... If that wasn't an eventful day, I'm not sure what is at this point. Unfortunately I have a feeling it's going to get a whole lot more eventful in the near future... But right now I want to get to bed, worrying about offending Princess Luna takes a lot out of a guy.

I walked past the still flabbergasted unicorn, stopping long enough to help her pick up her jaw. Afterwards I walked into the Library and entered the guest room, allowing myself to fall both onto the bed and into the land of dreams...

Ch 5: Unexpected Advances and Provoked Ponies

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I got up a bit earlier than usual this morning, hoping to avoid any dispute from Twilight. I get the feeling she isn't too keen about the lack of 'respect' I showed Princess Shiny-Plot the other day...

All that aside, I decided to walk around as a Griffon today since I'm curious as to what that'd be like. Besides... If I don't do it soon, I might not get a chance to do it! I almost got thrown into a dungeon or something yesterday after all! Well... Maybe not, but that doesn't mean I can't try out a new species! Great, now I'm arguing with myself...

I woke up pretty early though, even had plenty of time to admire my new form in the mirror before booking it away from Twilight's books.

Bad puns aside, I don't think I looked half-bad. My fur and wings were a sort of dark-red, while my head-feathers were black. My beak, eyes, and... Claws? Talons? Hands? Whatever, those were all a golden color. I think I'll refer to my claws as hands though, for the sake of simplicity and to avoid confusing myself...

The coloration of my fur and feathers definitely took me by surprise though, since most of the time my transformations are blue and blonde or vice versa...

Unfortunately, until I started walking through Ponyville... I'd forgotten that the last Griffon to come through here had left a pretty bad impression. Though considering that none of them were chasing me with pitchforks, I guess it doesn't really matter too much.

Though, what if Pinkie Pie is- wait... I suddenly had a large urge to slap myself. That's stupid; Pinkie Pie wouldn't be biased like that. I can't believe I actually thought she might end up disliking me for being a Griffon... Well, looking like a Griffon anyway.

Unfortunately I can't say I'm so confident about the feelings of everypony else around me, seeing as they're hiding at the sight of me. Oh well, I decided to try being a Griffon and this is a problem that's apparently going to come with this form. Live and learn, live and learn...

Though something I didn't realize, due to being caught up in my thoughts, was that I was being watched by a pair of eyes that were decidedly not scared and definitely didn't belong to a pony... These eyes were studying my unaware form with a hawk-like intensity from slightly above the rooftops of Ponyville.

Oh look, there it is! Sugarcube Corner... I hope Pinkie's there. Maybe I'll even get a Welcome to Ponyville Par- "Ack!"

A brown and white blur tackled me, causing me and whoever tackled me to get sent rolling.


Once I had stopped rolling, I stood attempting to shake off the dizziness and get my bearings back. Looking around, I noticed I wasn't in Ponyville anymore...

A quick check of my surroundings later, and I noted that Ponyville was off in the distance. That must've been one heck of a tackle to roll me all the way out here, or maybe I was on a hill?

Hearing a groan behind me, I turned around to see a creature that caused me to freeze.

"Ugh, I pounced way too hard..." Gilda said to herself, cradling her head in her one of her hands as she sat up. Noticing me staring at her, she raised an eyebrow. "What're you looking at Dweeb?" She asked aggressively.

One thing I'm going to say is that I'm not really all that aggressive or anything normally. But I'm not passive either. While I might not go looking for trouble... If someone decides to pick a fight with me, I'm almost definitely going to fight back.

"I dunno, maybe the clumsy Griffon that crashed into me?" I responded, rolling my eyes.

"Yeah well, you- I... Maybe I wouldn't have crashed into you if... if..."

I cut her off, "If what? If you were looking where you were going?" I asked sarcastically.

Looking back at Gilda, I had to do a quick double-take. She. Was. Blushing. No bucking way... I guess she must have learnt a little humility after all, Right? Heck, maybe she might even apologize?

Unfortunately, the exact bucking opposite happened!

Gilda quickly leapt at me with her talons out and ready to shred before she began to swipe at me with her wings flared out, which I'm guessing was for intimidation. Yeah, this is not a scenario I want to be in!

Leaning away from her claw strikes I attempted to reason with her, "Hey, there's no need to get al-" until she actually got a hit in. It was a scratch, nothing more than a line on my shoulder really... But it was enough to make me take the offensive.

After leaning away from her next two claw strikes, I used the opening she presented to grab her wrists and spin us both around before pinning her wrists to the ground. Then glare she had began to soften and she was looking at me with a... A blush? She was blushing again? Why the hay was... She... Blushing...?

Oh no. Oh BUCK no. I know Griffons are supposed to be some sort of warrior species or something, but please... Please tell me this isn't what I'm starting to suspect. Seriously, I'm praying to whatever higher power or entity that may exist to tell me I'm wrong. Send me a sign? PLEASE!?

Suddenly Gilda's head darted forward, her beak connecting with mine. Shocked by her sudden action, I let go and stumbled backwards.

THAT WAS NOT ONE OF THE BUCKING SIGNS I WAS HOPING FOR!! Stupid higher power or entity thing, why do you hate me? First it was Rarity's creepy cat and now this? Really? Ugh... Though her beak had felt surprisingly soft.... NO! No, stop thinking that right now!

Once I managed to shake myself out of my thoughts, the first things I saw were Gilda's eyes. She was standing there staring into my eyes from less than two feet away. Buck that freaked me out.

Gilda coughed into a clenched hand. "So, uh..." She seemed at a loss as to what to say next.

I raised a brow at her, watching as she attempted to compose herself. After about a minute of that, I turned and began walking back towards Ponyville.

"H-hey! Where are you going?" Gilda asked, hurrying over to walk beside me.

"Ponyville. I'm living there for now, 'till I can get a few things sorted." I responded, keeping my eyes firmly on the direction of the town. I have a feeling that's not going to be the end of it though...

"Oh, uh that's cool... My name is Gilda by the way, what's yours?" She inquired before blinking and shaking her head, recomposing her face into a mask of nonchalance. "I mean uh... Not like I care or anything." Like I thought, that wasn't the end of it.

I sighed, seeing her take glances at me out of the corner of my eyes. This is not something I ever could have expected when I woke up in Equestria. Then again, it's not like I expected to wake up in Equestria in the first place. I guess that everything I don't expect seems to be becoming the norm for me, joy...

"My name's Jet-Claw." I told her, making up a sort of Griffon-sounding name on the spot though I paused in my strides as I heard a... Purr? "Did you just...?" I asked, turning towards the female Griffon.

"No!" Gilda denied, shaking her head frantically. "Don't be stupid, Dwe- er... Jet-Claw!"

"So I've been promoted from 'dweeb' huh?" I asked rhetorically, raising a brow at her before turning back towards Ponyville. "Whatever... Just call me Jet." I told the brown-feathered female. Beginning my trek towards Ponyville once again, I found myself wishing I knew how to teleport...

I didn't really talk to Gilda, since I wasn't really sure what to say... But I guess she talked enough for the both of us, telling me about this and that. Eventually my walking company started to talk about a topic that interested me... Pranks.

"And then it exploded all over him, you should've seen his face!" Gilda laughed.

"Sounds like it was pretty funny..." I agreed, nodding my feathery head. "Almost as good as a few of the Pranks I've pulled in Ponyville the last couple days."

Gilda shook her head, "Heh, I doubt you could've done better than my explosive pie prank Jet." She disputed.

I shook my head with a smirk, "Tch, amateur work that required a purchased gimmick. I prefer using my own natural talents to get a job done; it's much more satisfying that way." I replied. "Anyways, this has been fun Gilda. You know, when I first met you... I thought you were a bit weird." I informed her, watching as she looked away with a frown.

"But after hanging out with you for a while... Well, you're pretty cool Gilda. Look me up in Ponyville sometime for a prank spree or something. Just ask the purple egghead at the library for Jet-Claw, since I'm staying in her guest room for now." I informed her.

Mentally, I raised an eyebrow at myself. Since when did I start calling Twilight an Egghead? For that matter, when did I start acting like this? I think my Griffon form is messing with my head.

"Great! Er, I mean... Yeah, cool." Gilda replied, trying to act nonchalant again.

"You know... You don't have to wear a mask around me." I told the female Griffon. "Anyways... I'll talk at ya later Gilda. Right now, I gotta Jet." I finished, spreading my wings and taking flight, zooming towards Ponyville as a large black blur.


This Griffon form is definitely messing with me, I mean... Gotta Jet? Seriously? But then again it did sound kinda cool so I'm not sure if I really care all that much... Besides, who cares if I show off a little? It's not like I- "Gah!"

I had to abandon my thoughts again, this time to make sure I could stay airborne after some sort of missile hit me. Can't I ever just finish my thoughts without being attacked!? Jeeze!

"Oopsies, sorry!" A chipper voice chirped in my ears. Or whatever passed for ears on a Griffon... "I didn't mean to crash into you Mr. Griffon guy! Wait... I've never seen you around before, so you must be new to Ponyville since I know everypony in Ponyville and-"

I knew that voice sounded familiar, it's Pinkie Pie! Who would've thought that I'd accidentally run into her while flying... Or that she would run into me I guess. Wait, speaking of thinking and flying... How did I know how to fly?

...Oh well, gift horse and all that. Gift pony? No... Whatever, it doesn't really matter, the point is-

"So what's your name Mr. Griffon?" Pinkie asked curiously.

Once again, my thoughts are interrupted. Maybe I'm just thinking too much?

"I'm Jet-Claw, but I prefer to be called Jet." I replied, doing a spin and catching the pink pony in my hands before she could fall to the ground. I landed soon after that, attempting to slow down so that I wouldn't hurt Pinkie or anything.

"Thanks for the ride Jet! And don't worry, I know I said I'm a bit busy right now, but I'm sure I'll be able to get a party together for you soon!" Pinkie told me before zipping off towards Sugarcube Corner. I wonder what could possibly make Pinkie too busy for a party? Oh well, I'm sure it's fine. Maybe I should ask Twilight though, just in case...


Walking up to the library, I heard shouting coming from the open second floor window. "I know Spike, but it's just so frustrating!" I paused as Twilight's voice made it to my ears, a grin spreading across my beak as I decided to eavesdrop a bit.

Quickly spinning myself into something small to go somewhat unnoticed, I found myself in the form of a yellow Parasprite with blue eyes. I shuddered even as I turned invisible and flew through the window, I quietly hoped that I wouldn't start throwing up Parasprites. Throwing up was bad enough, but upchucking a living ball of vomit? No thanks.

I snuck my way into Twilight's mane, figuring that would be a good enough place as any to hide. It certainly made things easier for me since I wouldn't have to follow her around, or search for hiding spots as she turned around or something...

"I mean, I would've thought he could at least told me himself! Ride the train to pick me up, or tell me, or something!" Twilight stomped her hoof angrily.

"Come on Twilight, I'm sure he's just busy... He is captain of the guard after all..." Spike replied, apparently attempting to justify somepony's actions.

My eyes widened at what Spike said, Captain of the guard? Does that mean that the whole Ca-

"Well he's also my BBBFF, so I'm pretty sure that he could've made time to tell his own sister that he's getting married!"

Tuning out their argument, I grinned. Oh this is too perfect! The Canterlot Wedding event, I have a feeling that I'm going to have fun with this. I can't wait to ruin Blueblood's suit and mane! Maybe throw some Ice-Cream at him? No, that's a waste of perfectly good Ice-Cream...

"-nd besides that, where's John?" Twilight asked the tiny dragon.

Spike shrugged, "I dunno... Probably out in Ponyville somewhere."

The purple unicorn huffed in annoyance, "Great. Perfect. Now we need to go find him before I can even go lecture my brother, because the Princesses decided it would be a good idea to invite him." She face-hooved with a growl of frustration.

My eyes widened once again at the unexpected way in, the Princesses actually wanted me to come along? That's great! Much better than my idea of hiding away in Twilight's mane as a Parasprite when she leaves for Canterlot...

I turned invisible and intangible before flying out to hover in front of the library door, turning myself back into a Griffon before I released the invisibility. Opening the door, I announced my return with a loud, "I'm back!" before walking in and closing the door behind me.

Twilight trotted towards me, looking upset for reasons I already knew. Not that I could tell her that, of course... "What's wrong Twilight? Somepony spill juice on another book?" I actually feel really bad for the filly that did that, she ran out of the library crying once Twilight finished lecturing the poor foal about 'Book Safety'.

"No." Purple-Bright responded with gritted teeth, "My brother is getting married. Apparently, you're invited." She used her magic to ram an envelope into my face. Thankfully it didn't get pierced by my beak, would've been hard to read or use after something like that...

"Cool." I responded with a small smirk, which seemed to make her more upset. "By the way, If anyone" - Not going to say pony, since I'm talking about Gilda and the word 'anygriffon' would be pushing it... - "comes around asking for 'Jet' or 'Jet-Claw'... Let me know, yeah?" I told Purple, watching as her angry look morphed into an inquisitive one.

"Why would-"

"Because that's what I've decided on going by while in Griffon form. Though I've still gotta think of a pony name for when I look like a pony..." I explained, having expected her to ask. "I'll be going to the wedding like this too, so if you could tell Celestia..."

"Fine." Twilight deadpanned before trotting back upstairs to prepare. "Spike, take a letter." Was the last thing I heard before back outside, intent on enacting a small plan to get her a bit more riled up...


"Do you really have to do that?" Twilight asked with annoyed as I scared away yet another group of ponies who had been glaring at my feathery face.

"No... But it makes me laugh, so I'm doing it anyways." I shot back, smirking again in a way that I knew she hated.

"Ugh, well stop it! I don't care if it makes you laugh, it's scaring everypony else."

I shrugged dismissively, "Whatever Twilight."

Twilight facehooved before looking up as somepony called her name, and her face visibly brightened. "Hey girls! You don't know how nice it is to see a friendly face right now...." Sparkles said, greeting her friends and shooting a glare at me.

"Is this guy givin' you trouble or something Twilight?" Rainbow Dash asked, pounding her hooves together in an attempt to be intimidating.

I've seen rabbits more intimidating than her. Wait, what? Wow, I'd better reign myself in... That sounded like something I would've imagined from Gilda after watching 'Griffon the Brush-Off'.

Speaking of which... "Hey Jet!" Gilda called, landing next to me. "What's up?" She asked, giving me a fist-bump.

"What's she doing here?" Paint Splatte- er... Rainbow Dash asked, glaring at the Griffon she used to be friends with.

"Jo- Jet." I hope nobody else noticed Twilight's little slip... "You do know that you were the only one here, aside from the six of us, that was invited right? You can't bring anypony else.

Anypony. That term is so subjective! I mean come on, what about Griffons? Or Dragons? Zebras? Seriously...

"Actually... According to the invite, I am allowed to bring one guest of my own. So I invited my newest friend to come along, I hope there isn't a problem with that?" I challenged the Know-It-All unicorn, looking at her with a challenging smirk upon my beak.

Twilight knew I had her beat and simply looked away, trotting towards the train with a quick prompt of "Come on girls..."

Gilda grinned, "Normally I'm not one for weddings, but this is already looking like fun." She told me, looking back towards the group of six ponies.

I chuckled, "Half the reason I invited you was to annoy them..." I Informed my fellow Griffon as we walked onto the train, casually flashing my ticket to the conductor as we passed.

Wait, fellow Griffon? when did I start thinking of myself as a Griffon!?

"And the other half?" Gilda prompted curiously.

"To have a friend to talk to. I know you'll be better company than those six, most of them barely know what a prank is after all. Let alone a good prank like some of the ones you've told me about."

Gilda was oddly quiet after that and didn't really speak until sometime after we'd found some good seats.


"Thanks."

"What?" I asked, looking over at the brown Griffon.

Gilda continued to stare out the window, which is what we've both been doing for the past couple hours of the train ride.

"I said thanks."

I walked over, sitting next to the Tom-boy. Tom-Griffin? Tom-Colt? Anyways, I took a seat next to her. "Thanks for what?" I prompted curiously, raising a brow at Gilda.

"Thanks for inviting me along Jet." She responded with a small frown, sighing slightly. "And thanks for being my friend..."

I was a bit sad that she felt the need to add that last part, I suppose I really shouldn't have judged her based on the show...

I wrapped a wing around the half-bird, pulling her in for a wing-hug while I stared out the window. "It's no problem Gilda, like I said before... You're cool." This time I paid no attention to the blush she was sporting, I was just glad to see that she was smiling again.


Gilda had fallen asleep long before the train arrived at the barrier. She was actually kind of cute, the way she snored and how she would snuggle into my side every now and then... Wait. When di- No. Screw it, I don't even care when I started thinking of the Griffon at my side as cute. I'll deal with it later.

Anyways, I nudged her awake as we passed through the barrier. "Gilda," I said, "we're here."

Gilda yawned and picked her head up from my shoulder, "Already?" She asked sleepily.

I chuckled, "Yeah, you slept through most of the ride. Feeling better?" I can't quite put my claw on it, but something about her seemed to change once I asked that question...

"Yeah... Ye-" My feathered friend was cut off by another yawn "-eah I feel much better, thanks Jet." Gilda assured me, flashing a smile.

We both got up and started following the assorted candy-colored ponies off the train. While walking towards the palace I noticed Rainbow Dash shooting small glares at Gilda,and the guards watching the both of us suspiciously. Great, problems already...

If those looks were just cast towards me, I'd be fine. But they were also aimed at my newest friend, so I was slightly annoyed. Call me protective if you want, but I do like to make sure my friends are comfortable and happy.

I watched as Twilight ran up to the guards, smirking a bit. Nudging the Griffon next to me, I flashed her a smile. "Hey, I'm going to go congratulate the groom and his soon-to-be wife, wanna join me?"

Gilda shook her head, "Nah, I think I'll follow these losers for a bit. I want to know where I'm sleeping after all..."

I shrugged,"Alright suit yourself Gilda, catch ya later."

By the time I landed near the brightly named siblings, Twilight had just finished performing the 'ladybug shake'. I snickered as 'Cadence passed by with a deadpanned 'uh-huh'.

Once she'd finished talking to Shield-Butt, I stepped into view to greet them. "Hello Shining Armor, 'Cadence'... Congratulations on deciding to get married, I hope you both get what you want out of the union."

"Who are you!?" Shining Armor asked, already pointing his horn at me with a charging spell. "And how did you get past the barrier, Griffon?"

Chuckling, I answered his last question, "Because I was invited, of course..."

Shining Armor glared at me, "Right like I'm going to believe that, I don't even know you! So tell me the truth, wh-"

"He is telling the truth Shiny..." Twilight said with a sigh, cutting off her brother's line of questioning. "The Princesses invited him."

Shining let his spell dissipate, but continued to glare at me. "Twily, Cadence. Please excuse me for a moment..." He commented before trotting into the palace, Twilight quickly following.

'Cadence' was about to follow as well, but I stepped in front of her. "Hello Chrysalis, it's nice to meet you." I greeted her with a smirk, using her real name now that Shining Armor and Sparkles had run off.

'Cadence' looked shocked as she looked at me, "W-what? I thought you knew my name? I'm Princess Mi Am- "

I shook my head, cutting her off quickly, "Drop the act Chrysalis, I know you aren't Cadence."

Her shocked look quickly morphed into a more cold and calculative one, "How would you know? Who are you?"

I acted shocked, "Oh, where are my manners? Right now, I'm known as Jet-Claw..." I informed her, giving a mock bow. "But then again..." I continued, tapping a claw to my chin. "I suppose I could be Sun-Butt too."

A quick spin revealed Celestia in my place. "Or maybe even you?" Another spin revealed a look-alike of Chryssy's true form. "But no, this-" I began to spin once again, "-is me." I finished my sentence as I stopped, allowing her to see my true human self.

"Obviously not a Changeling, and Discord's still imprisoned..." The Queen deduced. I guess it must be pretty easy to see that I wasn't using changeling magic. "So what are you?" Chrysalis demanded, glaring at me.

"Well since you asked soo~ nicely..." I responded sarcastically, rolling my eyes, "I'm a Human, Chryssy."

"Don't call me that!" Chrysalis roared, sending a bolt of green magic at me.

Thankfully intangibility works pretty well against magical bolts, which makes me wonder why it never seems to work against magical telekinesis... Different mechanics or intents, maybe?

Twisting myself back into a Griffon, I looked at the small crater in the castle wall "Geeze, Somebody certainly doesn't like nicknames..." I commented, giving a small whistle in appreciation. I am really glad that didn't hit me.

"But I guess you must be oh so busy, what with replacing a bride and stealing the love of her groom and all. So I should probably go, though I'll give you two warnings first... "

"One: Touch the other Griffon that came to Canterlot with me, and you die." I think the shadows that began crawling around my form helped the intimidation a bit, it certainly seemed to make her a bit nervous.

"And two... Don't be a hypocrite and end up underestimating two specific ponies if you want to be victorious." Nervousness to confusion, remind me to invite you to 'Poker Night' Chrysalis... I have a feeling your poker face is awful.

Having given my warnings, I flew off to look for Gilda and the Mane Six.


I am so lost... Why did I have to leave the others to taunt Chrysalis? I probably would've been in my room by now if I hadn't done that. Ugh... I've been walking through hallways for the better part of an hour, and I still haven't found jack sq-

"WE SHALL NOT FORCE HIM AWAY, HE HAS ALREADY BEEN INVITED AND SO HE WILL STAY!"

Oh boy, that sounds interesting! Walking towards the yelling, I found the two Princesses and Shining Armor in what seemed to be the Throne Room.

"So what if he was invited, I want him out!" Shining declared, stomping his hoof like some bratty child.

"Thou darest to question our decisions?" Luna asked in a way that was oddly quiet. Oh boy, straight from yelling to bubbling silent fury. Shining, you should really watch your ste-

"Yes, I do!" Turning from the steaming Moon-Goddess towards Sun-Light, he attempted to plead with her instead, "Please Celestia! You know about my history with Griffons!"

Trollestia looked about two steps from laughing. "He's not a Griffon." She told the Captain.

The aforementioned Captain looked dumbfounded. Heh, emphasis on dumb.

"What? How can he not be a Griffon? Have you gone insa- Er..." Wow, Shining almost called one of Equestria's Rulers crazy... That's gotta be some new level of stupidity. Or maybe he's just suicidal?

"He is a shapeshifter, hailing from a species known as 'Humans'." Celestia informed him, a patient smile on her muzzle. Remind me to never invite Celestia to a 'Poker-Night', I'd lose all my money...

"Fine, so he stays... But what about his friend? Is she some kind of shapeshifter too, or is she a dirty Griffon?" Somehow, I never imagined that Shining Armor would be racist towards Griffons.

"She is a Griffon, but should thee attempt to harm or oust John's Guest... We shall see to it that thou shalt be punished most severely.

*Ding* Well, that was the sound of my 'Luna is Best Princess' loyalty counter going up by one. Tallying the scoreboards... Celestia: 1, Luna: 100, Shining: -50.

Shining's just getting himself in trouble with everyone today, huh?

Stepping into the room, I added my own threat. "And if I find out that you've done anything to make Gilda uncomfortable while she's here, there won't be much left to punish..."

Once again, I'm protective of my friends. Well that, and I might be developing some feelings for Gilda... But for the sake of my current sanity I'll be leaning more towards my first reason.

Shining didn't say anything, but I could tell that he knew that he wouldn't get his way. Once he was gone, I asked Luna and Celestia a very, very, very important question... "So... Mind telling me where I'll be sleeping?"


Well this is awkward... Apparently I'm sharing a room with Gilda, since they didn't expect me to bring a guest. Or maybe it's just because Celestia is embracing a new role in life, next thing you know she'll announce an official name-change to 'Trollestia'.

I set about making myself a small bed on the floor with some of the spare blankets and pillows, deciding to be a gentle-Griffon and let Gilda have the bed. One small problem with that though...

"Hey, what're you doing? I said that you're gonna sleep on the bed."

Gilda refused to accept the offer.

"And I told you that I'm not going to let you sleep on the floor." I retorted, not willing to allow her to give up the bed. What can I say, I'm stubborn like that...

"Fine!" I sighed, feeling relieved that she'd given up. Unfortunately since I thought she'd just decided to give up and take the bed, I also let my guard down which allowed her to grab hold of me. "H-hey!?"

Gilda yanked me onto the bed, "I told you that you're sleeping on the bed tonight. But don't get any funny ideas, alright Jet?"

To be honest, I'm much more worried that she'd get some kind of idea in her feathery head seeing as she's the one who kissed me earlier...

Nonetheless, I could tell there wasn't any other way to make her accept the cushiony offering of the room's bed. "Alright, whatever makes you happy..." Why did I say that!?

The female Griffon nodded, "Good. Though... Uh..." She looked away for a moment, mumbling something.

"What?"

"I said I tend to cuddle things in my sleep, alright!?" Gilda snapped, obviously embarrassed.

I gave a slow blink at that tidbit. Why is it that everything in this world seems to surprise me? I've watched the entire show up to the end of season 4 for crying out loud! Than again, this isn't the show... This is life now. My life, apparently.

After about a minute of processing the new information, I shrugged and laid down. Too tired to argue, I just mumbled an "Alright..." as she laid down next to me.

Falling asleep, I wondered what tomorrow would bring, and whether or not I'd wake up to find myself being cuddled by the Griffon next to me...

Ch 6: Love and Hate... And Love again.

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When I woke up, I found my thoughts from last night were confirmed... I have become a teddy bear. I can't say I was afraid of this, because honestly I can't say it's bad to be cuddled by the Griffon next to me... But I can't say I hoped for it either, since I'm still working out my feelings on the idea of Gilda taking up space in my heart.

Nothing against her, but I guess I just never expected to even think of getting into any kind of relationship with a Griffon. I also never expected to think that she would look so cute and peaceful when she sleeps. The messy bed-head look her feathers took on somehow enhanced that image...

Somepony knocked on the door, *Knock Knock*

"Come in." I called softly, trying not to wake Gilda.

A mare with a silver coat and blue mane opened the door, dressed in a maid's outfit. "I was sent to escort you to breakfast..." She stated nervously, probably intimidated by the two Griffons. Especially me, since I was probably a good two feet taller than Gilda in this form. Plus the darker colors do a really good job of adding to that menacing look whenever I don't smile...

I sighed because I really didn't want to wake Gilda but my stomach growled, forcing me to agree. "Gilda..." I said, shaking her shoulder. "Gilda, it's time to wake up."

The female Griffin simply buried her head into my chest, letting out a muffled. "Don't wanna." I'm going to guess that she thought it was her blanket or something that she was burrowing into...

"Well, I guess you don't want breakfast then..."

Her head shot up, the previous drowsiness gone in record time. "Breakfast!?"

I laughed, getting up from the bed now that she'd relinquished her hold on me. "Yes, breakfast. We've even got a maid here to show the way."

"Oh, uh... Wait outside. I'll be there in a couple minutes."

I raised a brow, but shrugged and left the room to wait in the hall. I guess she felt the need to preen her feathers or something...

True to her word, she was out of the room about 3 minutes later with much straighter feathers and we followed the maid as she led us through the halls.

"How are your feathers still so straight?" Gilda asked curiously, wondering how my head had escaped any sort of ruffling.

I shrugged, "Just naturally resilient I guess..." Not sure if that's true, but it's the best I could come up with on the spot.


Once we'd arrived at what must have been the dining room, the maid retreated to the kitchens. The only ponies seated at the table at the moment were Luna, Sun Plot, Applejack, and Sparkles

Let's see... Celestia needs to be up early to raise the Sun, Applejack is likely used to getting up early due to living on the Apple Farm, and Twilight probably just read books all night long with the help of some sort of magic coffee spell or something...

But shouldn't Luna be asleep? Oh well, it's her choice I guess. For all I know, she sleeps a normal cycle just like anyone else and falls asleep after raising the moon. Maybe she checks on dreams when she sleeps? Either way, it's not really my problem.

"Morning!" I said cheerfully, grinning as Twilight winced at the excessive volume I used. She was definitely up reading all night... She's going to want some aspirin once Pinkie gets in here.

"Good morning Jet, Gilda." Celestia greeted. Luna seemed to grunt something with her head down on the table. She must be really tired...

"So, where's breakfast?" My stomach rumbled in agreement. Speaking of which, what is breakfast? If it's hay, I may end up looking around a few farms for a pig. Or maybe find a river with fish, which seems to be a sort of grey area... Though I was never a fan of seafood, maybe the Griffon taste-buds will make it taste better? Both cats and birds eat fish after all.

Celestia gestured to a piece of paper on the table. "You should look through and decide what you want." She explained.

So it's like a restaurant, huh? Alrighty, let's see here... Ugh, almost everything is vegetarian. Oh wait, here we go! Fish, hay-bacon... No real bacon? Blegh. Fish it is!

A butler came by to take everyone's order. I asked for deep fried fish with hay-fries and some bacon, just to try it. Gilda decided to do the same, but with a double serving of bacon.

Once we'd gotten our food, everyone dug in. At the beginning I was distracted from my food by the ravenous way Gilda ate her fish, it was oddly mesmerizing... If nothing else, at least now I know that she won't be disgusted by a lack of table manners.

After breakfast, Gilda and I decided to prank the castle employees and residents, starting with Blueblood.


"A little to the left..." Gilda called from where she was observing to make sure everything fit just right for the prank. "Stop! Perfect..."

"You remember the rest of the Plan?" She asked, grinning evilly.

Can I just say that I love her evil grin? "Yeah, don't worry." I shook my head, "If this works, we could be hailed as the best Pranksters of all time..."

Gilda laughed, "Yeah, I can't wait to see his fac-" Then the sound of hooves reached our sound-holes.

Hey, it's not like Griffons really have ears. I had to come up with something to call what we hear things with...

"Shh! Right on time, hide!" We both flew up and behind a tapestry, peeking out from behind it to see Blueblood walking down the hall. Guess the guards must really dislike Blueblood, considering they were willing to spill his schedule so easily.

"What in Equestria is this red 'X' mark doing on the floor? Have the servants been slacking yet again?" Blueblood complained, standing on the 'X' just as we'd planned.

Suddenly Blueblood heard an odd whirring sound from behind him. Turning to confront it, he got a face full of cake frosting. "Aahh~! I just had myself groomed!" The stallion shrieked.

He was unable to see due to the frosting all over his face and took a step back, tripping on a small and conveniently placed marble. "whoa!" He fell backwards, a shirt was pulled over is head and his hair landed in a small mixture of chemicals I had whipped up.

Standing up and attempting to wipe the frosting from his eyes, Blueblood was then assaulted by the swinging 'Boot-on-a-stick' that I'd set up earlier. The kick to his rump sent him flying, right into a set of pre-prepared pants.

Flashes that he couldn't see went off as we took pictures, attempting and nearly failing to keep ourselves from laughing.

Getting annoyed that he couldn't wipe the frosting off Blueblood, shook himself and sent frosting everywhere. Once his eyes were free, he looked around for the culprits though he couldn't find us.

Unable to see us, Blueblood ran off to tattle to his aunts. Of course, Gilda and I had to follow... Their reactions would be fun to watch.


"Aunt Celestia! I've been assaulted, we need to find the culprits and arrest them for attacking royalty!" Blueblood yelled, bursting into the throne-room.

Celestia and the guards turned to look at Blueblood and did a double-take. The Royal Guard who were some of the most composed ponies in Equestria - well, when on duty anyway - then fell over, laughing hysterically. Even Celestia couldn't help but giggle at her nephew's predicament.

Of course, being who he is, Blueblood didn't take that very well...

"What's so funny!?" He demanded, the angry contortions of his face serving to send the guards into further hysterics.

"You are!" I called from above, laughing as Gilda and I high-foured. Blueblood turned towards us, steaming mad.

I should probably explain why everyone was laughing. Blueblood was currently dressed up like a clown: His mane had been died and frizzed up into a large blue afro, he was wearing a clown's attire - Yellow pants and button up shirt with red polka-dots - and one thing I forgot to mention is that he was currently scratching his butt. Yeah, I put itching powder in the pants and I'm darn proud of it!

"You! YOU! YOU WOULD DARE DO THIS TO ME?!" He asked, his whole face turning red.

"Yeah. What's wrong, can't take a joke Pansy-Blood?" I asked, taunting the pretty-boy unicorn.

"Get down here!"

"Yyyeeaaa- No. "

"You arrogant Peasant!"

"Ponified Peacock."


"I'll have both of your heads for this!" Blueblood yelled after having apparently run dry of insults, I think that was literally the only one he had. Well that, or all his other insults were pony-related...

The air in the room grew cold and dark as the shadows began to writhe around, seeping up the walls and across the floor.

I glared at Blueblood, "Did you just threaten Gilda?" I asked quietly, though it was heard by the whole room.

I have to give the stallion a little credit, either he's braver than I thought or he's just too arrogant and stupid for his own good. I'm leaning more towards the later...

"Y-yes! I am! And if you don't want her starving in a dungeon, or dead, you'd best do as I say!" Blueblood seemed to grow more confident with every word of that threat... So yeah, he's definitely more arrogant and stupid.

The shadows grew longer and dark crystals began jabbing out of the ground around Blueblood, a result of my crystalline-based powers mixing with the darkness I had begun to radiate.

"Tell me Blueblood..." I began coldly, "Do you want to keep that pitiful life of yours? Because threatening my friend is a surefire sign that you're suicidal."

Celestia stood, her horn beginning to shine as she prepared a spell. "Jet that is enough, If you hurt Blueblood I will be forced to take action!"

I glanced at her, "Tch, fine. I'll just teach him a little lesson then..."

The shadows rushed forward, engulfing Blueblood before disappearing.

"AGH! THIS IS DISGUSTING!!!"

Celestia looked at me with a raised brow, a look of curiosity adorning her face as her spell dissipated.

"Don't worry; I just dropped him off in the middle of a large compost pile that I noticed earlier." I assured her dryly, still annoyed by the royal pain-in-the-plot.

"It's probably a good idea for him to stay away from Gilda or I from now on, otherwise I might end up doing something that I'm honestly not sure I'd regret." I suggested before turning and walking out of the room.


"Hey, you okay Jet?" Gilda asked, following me out of the room.

I paused in the middle of the hall as Gilda put her hand on my shoulder before turning to face her. "Yeah I'm fine Gilda, just a bit... Annoyed by that arrogant idiot. Sorry that you had to see me lose my cool like that."

Gilda shifted slightly as a nervous and somewhat embarrassed grin on her face. "Um, yeah... Actually..." She shifted again before looking away with a red blush showing in a stark contrast to her white feathers. "It was kinda... Hot...?"

I began to blush as well and was thankful that it didn't show very well through my black feathers.

Of course... I should have figured something like this would happen. I actually thought that she would be more scared or upset, in fact I half-expected her to yell at me about how she 'could take care of herself' or something. I'm actually not sure whether or not this reaction is better...

"Oh... Uh... Thanks." I replied, turning to continue my walk down the hall. I wasn't really sure what else to say in this situation... But I also didn't want to walk away without saying anything.

Gilda continued to follow through the hall, still blushing. I wonder where I'm going... I wonder if she wonders where I'm going...

"Soo... Where are we going?"

Yeah, she's definitely curious. "I don't know... I'm just walking for now, I guess."

"Alright, I'm going to get some grub then... Catch you later Jet!" She replied, flying down another hall. Nice to know that she knows where she's going at least, I still haven't figured out which way is up and which is down...

"See you later!" I called back, watching as her lithe form disappeared down the hall.


It was probably an hour later when found myself standing in an odd, nearly empty room. The only other thing I could see in the room was a table with an open book lying upon it. Getting closer to the book and flipping through it, I saw nothing but blank pages.

"Heheehhahahahaha~!" I turned around quickly, seeing 'Cadence' standing there. "You've fallen right into my trap!"

"This is a trap?" I asked, gesturing to the mostly empty room. "I only wandered in here by accident. Besides, if it was a trap... It's pretty bad. Well, unless you're fishing for Twilight that is."

"Inconsequential!" Chrysalis shouted at me, "Regardless of whether or not it is a 'good' trap, you have still fallen prey to it." She smirked, "You are an unknown and one that I cannot allow to roam around, especially since you know my true identity. But I won't kill you... You might make a good pet later."

The floor around me lit up in emerald fire, and I slowly began to sink into it. Chrysalis smiled darkly at me, until she noticed one little detail... I was smirking back at her.

Since I was actually sinking pretty slowly, I decided to talk to Chryssie a bit. "You know... I was going to be content to let things play out the way they were meant to." The Insect Queen looked confused at my declaration.

"Oh yes, I know what's going to happen. Or rather, what would've happened if you hadn't done this..." I gave her an evil smile, "But now I'm a bit annoyed. A bit grateful too I guess, since I did want to see the Crystal Caverns." Chuckling, I finished one last sentence. "But the next time I see you, be prepared to die."

I barely managed to catch sight of her shocked face before my head sank through the floor.


I woke up to the surroundings of the Crystal Caverns, it seems as though her spell knocked me out while transporting me here. "Ugh, my head..." And gave me a headache. Yeah, she's gonna die next time I see her... Or at least get a severe beating.

"H-hello?" A feminine voice called. "Is anypony there?"

If I hadn't watched the wedding episode then I would've thought it was Chrysalis calling out but I have seen it, so I knew it was really Cadence.

"Yea- er... Well... Yes and no, I guess." I replied, holding my head with a claw.

"Oh thank Celestia, I thought I'd been hearing things! Can you find me? I need help!"

I turned my head towards the sound of the voice or rather, the best approximation that I could get with the echoes distorting it... "Uh, yeah... Gimme a moment!" I turned intangible before beginning to walk through the crystals, looking for the pink Alicorn.


Something was wrong with Cadence; she wasn't anything like Twilight remembered... And this last event proved it; Cadence had Shining Armor under mind-control! Maybe that's why Shining had almost attacked John? Sadly, there wasn't much of anything Twilight could do at the moment. But maybe somepony - or rather someone- else could...

A crazed grin spread across the face of Celestia's student, "Cadence, I hope you're ready to have a meet and greet with my impossibly annoying friend..." She muttered to herself, trotting towards John and Gilda's room. "Because he owes me a favor, and I'm going to make sure that he pays up..."


Jeeze, how big are these caverns? I've been walking for what feels like hours! Then again, it's probably only been about half an hour.

"Hello? Are you still there?" She sounded really weak, almost like she was giving up...

Like hay I'm going to let her give up! She's way too selfless in the show to let her have her spirit broken like this! "Yeah, I'm here! Sorry, it's just a bit hard to tell if I'm going the right way. The echoes from the crystals... are...

That's it! I can use the crystals! "Try calling out again!" I requested, using my crystal-manipulation powers to prevent the crystals from vibrating and muddying up the sound.

"Okay..." There! I swiveled my head towards the sound and ran towards it, soon coming to a stop in a small crystal room.

Unfortunately, in the time it had taken me to arrive... Cadence had begun crying, obviously distraught. "I'm doomed... I'm doomed to stay down here until I die. I'm already going insane, there's no way anypony was really coming for me. Almost nopony even knows about this place after all..." She was telling herself, obviously sinking into a depression.

For a moment, I debated on changing forms before confronting her... But then I dismissed the idea, there was no real need unless she was afraid of griffons or something. Besides, if she sees that then she might mistake me for a changeling.

Walking over, I carefully tapped her on the shoulder. "Princess Cadence?


"What do you mean he's not here!?" Twilight shouted at the Griffon, "Where else would he be!?"

Gilda scowled, "How should I know?" She snapped, "Jet went for a walk an hour or two ago to clear his head, and I haven't seen him back yet."

"Arrgghh! I need him for my plan!" Twilight growled, angry that she would have to either go looking for John or figure out a new plan.

"Wait... What kind of plan?" Gilda asked curiously, raising a brow.

The Element of Magic blinked before grinning; maybe she wouldn't need to change her plans too much after all....


Cadence blinked away her tears as she felt a somewhat scaly appendage on her shoulder. Whirling around to face whoever had touched her, the Princess looked up in shock at one of the most intimidating Griffons she'd ever seen.

Normally Griffons weren't all that intimidating anymore... Sure they were a warrior race, but most of them had lost the darker and more intimidating colors. Though Cadence was always thankful for that when she went to a meeting with their kind, she never realized just how much she had taken that fact for granted until now...

Staring at her with golden eyes as well as razor sharp claws and a beak to match, was a larger than average griffon with dark-red fur/wing coloring and pure jet-black feathers covering its head. The sudden appearance of the Griffon had actually caused her to give an 'Eep!' and scramble backwards in surprise.


Wow Cadence is jumpy, "It's alright, I'm not going to hurt you..." I said, laying down on my stomach in a hopefully peaceful gesture. "Chrysalis sent me down here just a little while ago. She says it's because I'm an 'unknown'" - I made little quotation marks with my claws as I spoke - "But I think she's just mad that I scared her..."

Cadence looked at me with a strange expression, kind of like a mixture of surprise and understanding. "Well you do look a little... Intimidating..." She responded, looking to the side.

I couldn't help but laugh, "That's not why she'd be afraid. She's afraid of how much I know, of what I can do, as well as how easily I could kill her."

Upon Cadence's questioning look I rolled my eyes and flicked a talon upwards, causing a small spike of crystal to erupt out of the ground in front of her. I chuckled as she yelped and leapt backwards.


Cadence was a bit annoyed when the Griffon began to laugh at her jumpiness. "So that's why she's scared? You can control crystals?" She asked curiously, watching for a response from the large creature.

The Griffon seemed to pause before... Erupting into hysterical laughter. Cadence was getting a bit angry now, her eye twitching. "S-sorry, but no... I didn't mean to laugh at you, but that's barely even scratching the surface of my powers..." He informed the Love Princess. "By the way, sorry for not introducing myself earlier... You can call me Jet."


I couldn't wipe the smirk off my face at the look of surprise plastered on hers. Cadence was way too easy to surprise...

Then again, the smirk was wiped off my face completely when I noticed how malnourished she looked. Thinking for a moment how to fix this, I wished I had an apple from the kitchen... She could really use one right now.

Imagine my surprise when an apple materialized into my hand- er... Claw! I held it out towards Cadence, "Are you hungry?"

I didn't even see her move before the apple was gone and the Alicorn was giving a cute little burp. "Thank you..." She murmured, looking towards the ground.

I took several more apples from 'thin-air', setting them beside me. "Eat up, Tomorrow I'll take you back up to the surface.." I told the princess of Love.

"What! Why can't we go now?!" She asked, obviously upset by the idea of staying down here longer.

"Because you need some food and rest, and I'm a bit drowsy. I'll take you back up and 'deal' with Chrysalis tomorrow."

Cadence looked ready to protest again, but her stomach growled and she gave in. Snatching a few more apples, she ate her fill before falling asleep. I shook my head, wondering if she'd meant to use me as a pillow before allowing myself to fall asleep as well. I probably would've pushed her off first, but after what was likely several days of sleeping on hard crystal floors... I think she deserved something a little softer to sleep on.

Ch 7: 'Pest Control' and other developments

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I awoke to the sound of a chainsaw echoing through the caverns. Wait... No, that's just the sound of a snoring Cadence... Never took her for a snore-er.

Anyways, she's still snoring against my side and I'm feeling a bit hungry... Hmm... Aha, there's an idea!

I began to concentrate, focusing on some of the shadows in the area around us before bringing them together into a large inky blob in front of me. I've been wanting to try this for a while now... Soon the blob of darkness began to take shape, forming into something similar to a basic Shadow Heartless from Kingdom Hearts.

The newly created shadow-creature blinked before focusing on me with bright large yellow eyes that seemed to shine with some sort of inner light. Deciding this wasn't enough, I quickly created three more. "I need you four to go up into the kitchens and get us some food." I told them, "Get some fish for me, and maybe a salad with some apples for Cadence here." I elaborated, indicating the snoozing Alicorn.

I probably could have used my theft powers to get some food, but I think it's a good idea to start learning more about some of my somewhat newly acquired powers too.

The four creatures nodded at me before turning to the nearest shadow and diving into it, disappearing from sight.

Being as bored as I was, I decided to entertain myself by creating some Griffons out of crystal and having them put on a little Circus. I even made some Shadow-lions for the lion-taming act... Can't have a circus without the lion taming after all.


It was about twenty minutes into the circus acts when Cadence finally woke up, by which time the food had already been delivered by my little Shades. Heh, 'my little Shades' sounds like it could be some sort of mlp parody... Technically it kinda is, I guess. I'm like their ruler, and Celestia calls everypony 'my little ponies' so this could be considered some sorta weird parody thing. Oh well.

Cadence began to stretch like a cat with her eyes closed, yawning as she showed off her wonderfully toned flan-... Nevermind, let's NOT go there right now... Or possibly ever.

Anywho, her jaw fell open as she witnessed my crystal circus. I couldn't help but laugh at her expression of shock.

"W-what!?" She exclaimed, "There's been Crystal Griffons living down here!?"

I broke down at that, "N-no, there's not..." I managed to wheeze out, before finally reigning in my laughter. "I was just entertaining myself while you slept." I told Cadence, passing her the bowl of salad my little Shades had 'acquired' from the kitchens. "Go ahead and eat before we head to the surface, the lion taming act is about to start."

Cadence shook her head in disbelief, eating her food as she watched one of the Crystal Griffons begin trying to tame a shadow-lion with a crystal stool and a shadow whip as it roared at him and occasionally swiped a large paw in his direction.


Twilight glared at 'Cadence' from her spot as 'Best Mare' of Shining Armor, completely ignoring the large crowd of ponies waiting for the start of the wedding.

"How could Cadence have changed so much?" She wondered silently to herself, "What could've caused my favorite foalsitter to become like... THIS!?" Twilight thought, remembering her terrible attitude towards herself and her friends. "I don't know... But I'm going to find out somehow." She decided, watching 'Cadence' warily.

She'd be finding out sooner than she thought...


After Cadence had eaten her food, I snapped my claws and focused, causing the crystal constructs to crumble into piles of fine crystal dust and the Shades and Shadow-Lion to return to the Darkness.

"Ready to head up to the surface?" I asked the pink pony princess.

"Please." She replied with a nod, "I don't want to stay down here a minute longer."

I grinned as a potentially funny idea came to mind. Grabbing her, I began to quickly fly up to the ceiling which caused Cadence to scream at the rapidly approaching crystal and cover her eyes. Turning on my intangibility, we passed through the ceiling though Cadence continued to scream.

"You can stop screaming now." I told her with amusement lacing my tone, my grin widening just a bit as she hesitantly took her hooves away from her eyes and stared in shock at the rapidly moving earth that passed by... Or rather, the earth we were passing through.

"Jerk." Cadence said, slapping my arm with a huff and a cute little pout. The slap actually connected, which was interesting... Guess it was because we were both intangible? I'd better remember that for later.


Soon I found myself landing just outside a pair of large, too large if you ask me, doors. from behind the doors, just in time to catch the end of some distinctly wedding themed music... "Oh no, we're too late!" Cadence cried out in distress, having heard the ending of the tune 'here comes the bride' emanating from the room.

'Are there any here today who would object to this union?' wafted out from behind the doors.

"Not yet." I told Cadence with a genuine smile, "Follow my lead."

I pushed the doors with a decent amount of strength, causing them to open before impacting the walls with a large *Bang!* sound. "I object!" I called loudly, striding into the room.

Every creature in the room seemed very surprised by my interruption, but non moreso than three very specific ones.

"John?" Twilight thought, confused by my appearance.

"Jet, where the HAY have you been!?" Gilda demanded, not really shocked by my action but more by my sudden presence in the room. And probably a bit upset that she didn't have her over-sized feathery plushie last night.

And finally... "You!" 'Cadence' hissed quietly before resuming her act. "Why would you interrupt my special day like this!?" She asked tearfully, probably trying to rally the ponies with her fake sadness routine.

I smirked at her, "Nice try Chrysalis..." I told the disguised changeling, " But it's not your wedding..."

"It's mine!" Cadence finished, walking out from behind me.

Chrysalis sneered, "How did you escape!?" She demanded.

"I helped her get out of there, not hard for someone like me Chryssie." I replied, still smirking at her.

"I TOLD YOU NOT TO CALL ME THAT!" the bug roared at me, dropping her disguise before shooting a strong bolt of magic at me. It harmlessly impacted the wall behind me due to my quickly activated intangibility. Well... Harmless for me, not so much for the wall.

I whistled as I appraised the damage, ignoring the crowd fleeing around me "somebuggy got an upgrade." I commented, looking at the hole in the wall.

Turning back, I noticed that Celestia was down and the mane six, plus Gilda, were looking at the changeling queen in fear. "Seriously?" I deadpanned, "I turned around for like... two minutes!" Sighing, I began to walk towards the hysterically laughing Queen.

Noticing me, she turned and her horn glowed a sickly green. "Oh Shining Dear~" She practically purred, "Would you take out the trash?"

Shining Armor turned towards me, his eyes practically imitating his first name with the amount of magic they seemed to be saturated with. "Of course." He droned, his horn beginning to glow.

Huh... I just noticed the barrier is gone. Wonder why I didn't notice before... Maybe it only went down just now? oh well I g-

I cut off my train of thought as I felt another bolt of magic pass through me. Looking towards the source, I noticed Shining Armor standing there between me and Chrysalis with his horn glowing.

"Jeeze, somepony woke up on the wrong side of the bed." I joked, "Now kindly get out of my way so I can swat a fly."

Shining simply shot another bolt of magic in response, a bolt that ALSO passed through me. "Some ponies just don't get the memo..." I said, shaking my head at him. "If it didn't work the first time, it probably won't work the second time either."

And another bolt... Now I'm annoyed. I quickly formed a crystal cage around Shining Armor, using the shadows of the cage to create a small Shade, which hopped onto his back and grabbed his horn to prevent him from casting any more spells.

"Now than... On to you Chrysalis." I said, turning my head towards her just in time to receive a face full of green. I am SO bucking glad that I trained to make myself able to activate my intangibility as a reflex.

"That's just rude Chryssie..." I said, walking towards her with a grin. "But understandable I guess... So I hope you understand that I've gotta beat your face in now."

The terrified Changeling monarch began scrambling away from me in fear, apparently she finally understood that she could do little to nothing against me... Good.

I then glanced around at all the terrified ponies around me before sighing, I'm too nice sometimes...

"I'll show you mercy today Chrysalis." I said, causing her to blink in surprise before grinning, probably thinking that she was going to get away scot-free. "I'm going to throw you, and every other changeling in the city, out of Canterlot. If I ever find out that you've come back... I'll kill you." I threatened, glaring at her as nearby shadows began to writhe around my form.

Without further ado I used my shades to toss her, and every other Changeling in Canterlot, through a shadow portal and into some random area near the border of Equestria.

I walked to the group of ponies with a disappointed sigh, "Didn't even get revenge for the headache..." I mumbled dejectedly, "Stupid ponies, and their stupid innocent pony eyes..." I'm not really angry at them, but I REALLY wanted to get her back for that big bucking headache I had when I woke up in the caverns. Oh well, life doesn't always go the way we want it.

I probably could have beaten her up... but then the ponies would probably call ME a monster. Such is life.

"Well, that takes care of Canterlot's major pest problem." I joked, helping Celestia to her hooves.

"Yes... Thank you Jet." Celestia said gratefully, "This was a dark time for my little ponies, and I fear what would've happened had you not been here to help after I was defeated."

"Aaww~... I didn't even get to use Twilight as a magical Gatling Gun!" Pinkie pouted, causing me to look at her in shock and everybody else to look at her with confusion evident in their eyes.

"How-.. You know what? Never mind, you're you Pinkie. I'm not even going to try to think about how you know about that." I told the bubbly pink mare, shaking my head resignedly.

"That was pretty cool Jet." Gilda congratulated me, patting my shoulder as she came over to my side. "Really Ho- er... Really strong display." She said, glancing around at the ponies as she corrected herself.


Later that night, after the real wedding and the party, Cadence and Shining were standing in front of me. "I can't thank you enough for helping me get out of those caverns." Cadence was telling me. "If you hadn't, who knows what could've happened?"

Shining nodded, "Yeah, Thanks. I can't believe I didn't even realize that those headaches were from the barrier, that Changeling mind magic was some powerful stuff."

"No problem." I told the two, "There's just one thing I want to ask of you."

"Name it." They replied.

"Can you try to let go of your little Griffon prejudice Shining?" I requested, "Not all Griffons are bad, some just might seem a bit rough because they don't quite understand ponies." I told him, glancing at Gilda for a moment as she talked with Rainbow Dash.

Shining sighed, "I... Yeah. I guess I could try that." He told me before holding out a hoof, which I bumped.

"Cool. See you around." I said, walking back towards Gilda.


"Exciting Day." Gilda commented as we got into the bed in the Canterlot. "In more than one way..." The last part was a mumble, that I barely picked up.

"What was that?" I asked curiously.

"I said it was exciting in more than one way, okay!" She snapped.

"Oh... Okay." I said, rolling over.

"H-hey Jet...?" Gilda said hesitantly.

"Yeah?"

"Wanna go out?

"...." I thought about it for a minute, Do I really want to try a relationship with Gilda? Do I really want to try to find romantic happiness with somebody not of my original species? "...Sure." I responded, deciding that I'd give it a try.

Hey, I'm a shapeshifting Human/Hide-Behind/Cheshire Cat hybrid thing in a world with little to no other humans around and I'm getting comfortable in my Griffon form. Don't judge me.

Ch 8: Heading home and Crazy workplaces.

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The next day saw Gilda and I on the train back to Ponyville along with the Mane Six. Gilda and Rainbow Dash were chatting off to the side, apparently they made up at some point during our stay in Canterlot... Good for them.

As for me, I was staring out the window and watching the scenery pass by as Purple-Smart jabbered on endlessly about the powers she saw me use. Ugh... I think it was a list of questions or something, maybe some exclamations of surprise about powers she didn't know I had and why the list didn't say anything. Can't say I'm sure about that though, I tuned her out a while ago.


"Finally!" I exclaimed joyfully, walking off the train. "Free from interrogation!" I finished, glancing over at Sparkles.

Gilda gave a small chuckle at that, along with Rainbow Dash, "Yeah... You learn to tune her out." Rainbow told me with a small smirk.

Ignoring Twilight's protests I grinned back, "Tune what out?" I asked playfully, "I stopped listening after the first ten seconds."

Rainbow flopped onto a cloud as she laughed, soon joined by Gilda. "You know what, I can kinda see why Gilda likes you.. You're pretty cool Jet." The multi-colored mare told me. "Not as cool as me of course, but still cool."

"Thanks." I began, "But I think I'm at least twenty percent cooler than you." I told her with a smirk.

"Hey, that's my line!" She cried out before her ears flopped back onto her head as she glared at Gilda, Pinkie, and Twilight, all of whom were laughing. "Wow, no support here..." She muttered with a pout, though she would almost definitely deny pouting if asked.

"So Jet..." Gilda began, "When are you gonna tell us about your powers and stuff?" She asked curiously, "How'd you get abilities like that?"

I began to mentally sweat at that question and glanced over at Twilight, who shook her head as if to say 'You're on your own.'. I glared at her slightly, and she gave me a sheepish smile and a shrug. Dash was right, no support at all....

"Well... Let's just say I was... Forcefully taken to a lab, and injected with them." I told her, not wanting to disclose everything. I know I might have to give her the full truth eventually, but I don't feel like doing it right now... Especially when we're in a large and very public area like this one.

Gilda frowned, "Yikes... That's terrible dude." She told me, looking like she kinda wished she hadn't asked.

I shrugged, "Yeah, but what's past is past." I told her. "Besides, I definitely wouldn't have met you if they hadn't done it." I finished with a grin.

Twilight looked between us, "I hope you don't expect to live together in my library." She deadpanned.

I blinked in shock, I never even thought about that living situation being a problem...

Gilda shrugged, "Jet can come live with me than." She decided, "I've got a cloud-house floating around Ponyville." Gilda than grinned, "Besides, I think he's much better to sleep on than a cloud pillow."

Black feathers are excellent blush-blockers. Which really helps in situations like this, especially since it gave less ammo for any of the ponies to tease me with.

"Why I do believe some-griffon is blushing~.." Rarity teased me with a smirk.

Dammit. Guess it doesn't work as well as I thought, curse you magical blushes that somehow show through dark fur and feathers!

I think I'm just gonna stay a griffon for an indefinite period of time... Though that means that I can't go buck apples for a job, seeing as Applejack hired an earth pony and not a Griffon. "Any of you ponies know where I could get a job?" I asked curiously.

"Oh! Oh! You can come bake at Sugarcube Corner!" Pinkie immediately offered, "Mr. and Mrs. Cake have been wanting to hire another baker for a while!"

Baking huh... Well, I did enjoy baking back on earth. My grandma had some amazing recipes, and home-baked goods always tasted much better than muffins or cakes from a grocery store. "Sure. As long as you've got a recipe book or something I can follow when I start, I'm sure I could bake."

Wonder if I'm getting too trusting and loose... Nah, these are ponies that wield the Elements of Harmony! I doubt I have to worry about them doing something other than pranking me when my back is turned.

"Great, you can start tomorrow morning! Better get a good night's rest Jet, the morning rush is tough!" The pink party pony told me.

I shrugged in response, after all... What's the worst that could happen?


"Two dozen lemon muffins, pronto!" Pinkie called, popping her head into the kitchen.

I glared at her slightly, my form covered in flour, sugar, and various other baking ingredients. "That many!?" I sighed, well... This is more hellish than I though possible. Than again, 'Hell is what you make of it'. "Alright, coming right up!" I told the pink mare, trying to sound positive, "But don't call me pronto!"

She simply giggled, "Okie Dokie Lokie!" She replied, leaving the kitchen to continue watching the register.

"Somepony must be having a get-together or something..." I muttered, working to fill the large order.


"I think I actually prefer the soul-sucking, mind-numbing bore of an office job at this point." I commented idly as I cleaned the kitchen with Pinkie, having closed up Sugarcube Corner a couple hours ago.

"You'll get used to it!" Pinkie chirped, cleaning some egg yolk off the ceiling. How did that get up there... Better yet how did she get on the ceilin-...never mind. It's Pinkie Pie.

"We'll see..." I mumbled, using my intangibility to clean all the baking residue off myself in an instant. Though now I have to mop the floors again...


I went to bed, Gilda snuggling into my side before we slept. "How was work?" She asked.

"...Relentless." I decided, causing her to laugh.

"Good Night Jet."

"Good Night Gilda."

Ch 9: The Crystal Empire... I thought this would be more exciting.

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"Hey Jet!" Gilda yelled excitedly, pouncing on me.

"Oof!" Well... That's one way to wake me up. "Hey Gilda, what's up?" I asked after recovering the air that had escaped from my lungs.

"Apparently there's someplace called the Crystal Empire, and it just reappeared or something." She said, seeming excited, "Dash told me about it."

"The Crystal Empire's appeared already?" I mused aloud, though I didn't realize I was vocalizing my thoughts. "Hmmm... Do you want to see the empire Gilda?"

"Can we!?" She exclaimed, giving me an adorable pleading look.

I smiled at her, "I wouldn't have asked if I wasn't planning on going."


I grinned as I used my powers to sneak us aboard the train to the Crystal Empire. "Now we've just gotta find seats."

Gilda chuckled, "Like the ones right there?" She deadpanned with a smirk.

"Yeah... Smartflank." I responded, taking a seat.

"Don't you mean toned-flank?" She asked mischievously.

"You bet I d-... er..." My face tried to match the color of my body as my mind caught up with my beak and Gilda began laughing at me.

I was saved from further teasing by a door opening and a group of six chatting mares walking inside the compartment. "Betcha can't wait ta see yer brother again." Applejack was saying.

"Yeah, it'll be- Jet!?" Twilight responded, changing from cheer to shock as she noticed me and Gilda lounging around the compartment.

"What am I, invisible?" Gilda asked.

"Nope, I can see you quite well." I replied, looking over at the Griffon. "And you look great."

She turned away with a small blush and the hint of a smile, "You're going soft on me Jet." She said, acting tough.

"Tch, you know you like it when I say sappy stuff." I rebuked, waving a claw at her. Then I turned towards Twilight, "So what's up?"

"What's up? What's up!?" She said, seeming agitated, "How did you get on the train!? Better yet, why!?"

"Because we wanted to see the crystal empire of course." I told the purple unicorn as if it was obvious.

"How did you even hear about the Crystal Empire!?"

Rainbow Dash chuckled nervously, "I might've mentioned something to Gilda."

"Of course." Twilight deadpanned, facehoofing.

"In her defense, I knew about it long before her or Gilda could've told me." I said, raising a claw into the air.

"And you knew that... How, exactly?" Twilight asked, her left eye twitching slightly.

"That's..." Everybody leaned in to hear the answer, "A secret!" I finished cheerfully, causing everyone to face-hoof/claw. Always wanted to do that!

Twilight muttered something angrily under her breath about 'information hording, shape-shifting humans' as she walked over and took a window seat nearby.


Departing the train to be greeted with a severe blizzard, Twilight heard her brother call her name and called out in return. "Shining Armor!?"

aforementioned white unicorn came walking into view with what looked like some sort of Star-wars rip-off snow-gear before taking it off. "Twily, you made it!" He then proceeded to embrace his sister in a hug.

"We'd better get moving." Shining stated after the hug ended, "There are things out here that we really don't want to run into after dark..."


Yeah, sorry to glaze over the panicked questions and stuff but it was pretty boring. To sum it up, Scared questions, vague answers, ponies running from Sombra in shadow form, etc, etc.

Then on the other side of the barrier, Shining armor reveals his horn to have been sorta crystalized and stuff. Sure I could've helped, but things are gonna run the way they will... Probably... Okay, who am I kidding? I'm gonna meddle at the first fun-looking opportunity.


I grinned as the group walked around, looking at all the crystals surrounding us. Yeah this environment is just begging to be messed wit-... That dance. Do they even realize just how provocative that 'Ladybug' dance is? They're shaking their rumps in the air for Cawes sake.

....Yeah, I've been picking up some Griffon lexicon from Gilda. Anyways, moving on... I'm not sure what I want to do here, it's all so... Yeah. I'm just gonna observe for now.


"HAhahahaha~ Hahah... ha... heh... Oh this is hilarious." I laughed, floating around as I observed the Mane 6 trying to get info from the ponies.


"Wait for it... Wait for it..." I murmured to Gilda as Applejack approached Twilight.

"A Library!?" Sparkles sparkled, "Why didn't you say so!?"


"I just can't help but laugh at her..." Gilda managed to say to me, the two of us laughing uproariously at Twilight's reactions to the books. "It's like she's purposely asking to be laughed at!"


"Catchy song." I decided as Applejack looked at the 'Crystal Heart', "But the heart looks like crap."

"Hey!" Twilight protested, "I think it looks great!"

"Keep fooling yourself Purple-Smart." I replied smugly. "Besides, it's crap no matter how well you think you carved it... Just wait 'til you learn the truth about the Heart."

"Truth? What truth?" Sparkles asked.

"You'll find out soon enough."


"I didn't know it was an actual relic!" Twilight cried out worriedly, "The book didn't mention anything about the Crystal Ponies powering up the Heart!" She flipped through the book. "There was a page missing! How did I not notice!?"

I chuckled as they re-raised the blue dome to keep Sombra out. "Yo Shining!" I called as Twilight ran out of the room to find the Crystal heart.

"What is it Jet?" the prince asked curiously.

"I'm gonna go keep your little Shadow infestation busy... Don't try to +tell Twilight though, even if I end up 'disposing' of it." I told him, walking towards the edge of the balcony. "The Empire still needs that Crystal Heart, whether Sombra is around or not... And she needs to pass her little 'Test'." I added.

Gilda made to follow me, but I shook my head. "No, it's not safe for you out there Gilda." I told her, before blinking. "Wait... Actually, you know what.. Nevermind." I laughed at my own forgetfulness, "He's made out of shadows, which means he couldn't hurt you unless I wanted him to.... And that's never gonna happen." Gilda rolled her eyes at my little 'sappy' moment before socking me in the shoulder. "Ow..."

"I'm not scared of a namby-pamby little half-dead prince anyways." She told me, a bit grumpy at the idea of being treated as a damsel in distress. I wonder if she even realizes the reference she almost kind of made... Hehe, Snape was more than just half-dead by the end of that series...

With that silly thought, I flew off towards the border of the barrier, Gilda following close behind. What can I say? I like to meddle, and messing with Sombra might be fun.


Stepping though the barrier, I noticed a large gathering of shadows. "YO SOMBRA!" I shouted out with a grin.

"Grr..." Sombra's large shade-form manifested in front of me. "CrYstALs...."

I laughed, "Wow you're ugly." I taunted.

"GRarRR!!" Sombra dove at me with a roar.

I laughed as his form splashed harmlessly around me before reforming. "Guess what Sombra?!" I called, "You're made of Darkness and Shadows, with limited control over Crystals that you've corrupted!" I grinned, "AND ALL OF THOSE THINGS ARE WITHIN MY DOMAIN!"

I began twisting his shadows into silly shapes, smiling faces and puppies and balloons and the like, as he roared at me. "Awww~, who's a weak little villain?" I asked tauntingly with a grin. "Who's a weak little villain?" Gilda laughed behind me, Sombra's darkness unable to go near her without my say-so. And I definitely was NOT going to give the okay.

"StOP ThIS FOolISHness aT OnCE!" Sombra demanded, as I continued to mess with his shadowy form.

"Hmm... Nah!" I decided, chuckling at his continued exclamation of rage.

"Huh?" I looked towards the failing barrier, "Might as well let you go over there, Twilight's probably nearly at the Crystal Heart by now. Can't keep her from her lesson..." I said, releasing Sombra and his shadows from my control... Mostly. I kept a bit of control, making sure that he couldn't hurt Gilda.


And after that, things played out pretty much the way you'd expect. Twilight and Spike got the heart out, Cadence caught Spike, Empire was saved, Twilight passed her test, etc... But who cares about that? Gilda and I had a blast! The End.







Not really... No, not just yet.


"So Gilda..." I started, looking at her as we lay in bed back in our cloud-house.

"Yeah Jet?" Gilda asked curiously, arching a brow as she looked back.

"What would you say, if I could make it impossible for you to get hurt?" I asked curiously. It's possible, just steal the concept of Gilda getting hurt and bam. Invulnerable.

Gilda frowned, "What brought all that on?"

"Well, if Sombra hadn't been made out of shadows, there's some possibility you could've gotten hurt or something following me, and I just sorta wanna make sure that doesn't happen an-" My rambling was cut off as Gilda pulled me into a kiss.

"Don't worry about it you Doofus, I can take care of myself just fine." She told me as she pulled back from the kiss.

Yeah, that sounds more like the Gilda I first got to know. "Alright, fine. But if you die on me, I'm gonna be pissed."

Gilda grinned, "Good thing I'm not gonna die any time soon than, isn't it?" She asked, just before pouncing on me.

I smiled into the latest kiss, my darkness drawing the curtains shut with a thought as things got heated in the bedroom.

Ch 10: Magic Duel... Eh, why not?

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I laughed as Fluttershy threatened Twilight, "If anything happens to them, so help me..." She was saying, before Spike stepped up to reassure her.

"Ya know, I kinda hope that she fails... Just to see what Buttercup Quiverhooves'll do." Gilda told me, reaching over to grab some popcorn from the bucket in my hands.

"Yeah, that threat was pretty open-ended." I agreed, somewhat hoping to see what Fluttershy would do.

Finally, after what seemed like forever, Twilight stepped up to start her magic thing. "Jeeze, I kinda feel bad for her... She's more tense than the animals." Gilda was obviously referring to Fluttershy, who had already covered her eyes and started shaking. Quiverhooves indeed...

Meh, it's part of her own type of charm I guess. She seems like an adorable little sister, if you ask me. "Getting softer by the day Gilda, what next? Are you planning to hug her and tell her everything's gonna be all ri-Ow!" My little teasing session was quickly cut short via punch to the arm.

"Shut up Jet." Gilda told me with a mock frown, "I just pity her a bit is all, that doesn't make me less tough."

"Yeah," I chuckled "I can feel that." I told my fellow griffin, rubbing the spot she'd hit.

"Aw~, poor baby..." Gilda cooed mockingly at me, fluttering her eyelashes "Now who's getting soft?"

"Yeah, yeah..." I replied, waving a talon dismissively with a small smirk. "I prefer to think that you just hit hard."

And then the show was over, "Jeeze... For somepony who can lift an Ursa Minor, you sure get tired with just a few animals..." I called out to the obviously sweating sparkles.

"Shut up Jet!" She called back, "There's a lot more fine details to work with than lifting an Ursa!"

"Sure, sure... you know what that's called?" I asked rhetorically, "An EXCUSE!"

"Well you know what, if you think it's so easy than-" Twilight's attempted challenge was cut short by the arrival of a multi-colored speedster known as Rainbow Dash.

"Twilight come quick, it's an emergency!" She shouted in the purple unicorn's face, just after crash landing on her.

"Welp, guess it's about time for the Magic Duel... Eh, why not?" As long as Gilda doesn't get hurt in any form, I'm game.


We arrived just as Applejack and Pinkie Pie were hauling Rarity off in a dress that even I could tell was completely hideous... And lemme tell you, I have zero fashion taste. Well, clothing-wise anyways... I think I make a pretty good griffin color scheme, if I do say so myself.

"What's going on here?" Twilight asked, walking over.

"Well, well, well, If it isn't... Twilight Sparkle." Trixie declared dramatically, throwing her hood back and causing all of the ponies to gasp.

"Trixie." Twilight responded seriously, mad-face on.

"What's she doin' here?" Spike wondered, claws clenched.

Gilda yawned, and I verbalized my boredom quite clearly, "Yawn~, boring! Hey, how about some laserbeams?" The ponies might be surprised, but I wasn't and Gilda probably just didn't care.

"You called that 'Great and Powerful?" Rainbow Dash asked, taking to the air.

Trixie grinned before zapping Dash, causing one wing to become incredibly over-sized and made Rainbow completely lose her aerial stability.

The twin idio- I mean the two senseless colts complemented her before getting blasted as well. And then Trixie challenged Twilight, meaningless dialogue, a bit of backstory, an insult from Pinkie Pie, more magical stuff, yadad yadda... Ah, finally! The Magic duel begins.

"Draw!" Trixie shouted, throwing a magic beam at a cart and causing it to go flying at some poor unsuspecting bystanders.

"Woohoo~! Laser beam!" I cheered, eating some more Popcorn with Gilda as we sat watching from a cloud. "Though it really looked more like Electricity than Lasers, so I'll give it a five outta ten."

Twilight levitated the cart, and it's contents, safely to the ground and turned to confront Trixie... Only to Find some pies flying at her face.

"Hah, a nice Classic Prank!" Gilda giggled, just before Twilight conjured a parasprite to eat them and then banished it and the duplicate it'd spit out.

"Eh~... I'll give that counter a 7 for potential riskiness if she'd forgotten to banish it." I graded. "Though I'm surprised to hear you giggling Gilda... Maybe I should call you Giggly Gild-Ow! Gilda's fist met my arm once again in a brilliant... Well I'd say it was a battle, but it was more like a beat-down since both my arm and I know we'd never hit her back. Push her, maybe... But hit her? Nnope.

Snow filled Twilight's vision, just before I watched her become a snowpony parody of herself. "Eh... That sucked." I commented, thoroughly disappointed with the quality of that attack.

Twilight then melted through the snow, which was equally sucky and completely unimaginative. But then... she gave Trixie a mustache! "Nine outta Ten for hilarity!" I managed to get out, Gilda and I leaning against each other for support as we laughed.

"Oh, this part... I gotta say, I feel more pity for Snails than Snips. Being that old must be painful... And now cue a painful drop, ouch..." I gave a running commentary for that part.

And then the banishment... Woo. Cue heartfelt goodbye and yadda yadda, next scene!


"Well... I gotta admit, those are some nice evil banners." I whistled, looking at said banners. "Though red and black is a bit cliche I think... Done to death in just about everything evil."

"Nopony asked you Jet!" Rarity snapped from her sewing machine, obviously angry with the situation.

"That's actually pretty ironic, coming from you Jet..." Gilda said, gesturing towards my entire body.

"Hey! I'm tastefully Black and Red, thank you very much! Besides; I'm not evil, so it's not a cliche." I retorted, causing Gilda to laugh at me.

"Sure, Sure..." She smirked, "You know what that's called? An excuse!"

I could do nothing but simmer in my loss of the verbal battle as my own words from earlier were used against me. "Hoisted by my own petard..." I mumbled dejectedly.

"The hell's a 'petard'?" Gilda asked, confused.

"Don't worry about it."

And then Applejack's personal 'tickle toture' began and ended... Weak~! She broke in less than two seconds, I mean come on! No wonder she wasn't the Element of Loyalty...

"Who would've thought that Applejack was that ticklish?" Gilda wondered aloud, "She seems a bit too tough for that..."

"So do you, but you still laugh hysterically at the smallest poke in th- ow!" And cut off again due to Gilda's punch of verbal cut-off, patent pending.

"Watch it Jet." She warned, "Otherwise I'll sock your arm again."

"Oh no, my poor abused arm~!" I replied in what was probably a seriously over-the-top dramatic voice... This idea was confirmed by yet another punch to my 'poor abused arm'. "Keep this up and ponies might start thinking I'm in an abusive relationship."

"Tch, yeah right..." Gilda waved it off, "They're way too busy with their own problems for that."

"You two! Fetch me some water!" Trixie called, pointing at us.

"Fetch it yourself you whiny and demanding pain-in the flank." My feisty female friend snarled back.

"Why you..." Trixie gritted her teeth before sending a blast of electricity at Gilda, a blast of pink electricity.

"Stop it, that tickled." Gilda deadpanned. Yeah, she's really only ticklish in one or two spots... So meh.

"W-what? That should've shocked you right out of the air!" Trixie declared in disbelief.

"Yeah, it probably would've... if you were still wearing this." I said from right next to the arrogant blue mare, spinning the necklace around my claw. "It's surprising how easy it is for any random nobody to get their claws/hooves/other appendages on a powerful magical artifact nowadays."

"H-huh!? How did you get that!? Only I'm supposed to be able to remove it!" Trixie demanded.

"It's called being overpowered, deal with it. You think you're strong with this little trinket? Hah! I've got more power at the tip of my smallest claw than you've got in your whole body." I told her. Not sure if that's actually true, but what I do know is that I could EASILY lay a serious beat-down on her without even moving.

"Here." I said, tossing the amulet back to her, "Try and harm Gilda again, and I might just have to kill you..." I punctuated my statement by having some darkness float around and radiate ill intent. Just learned to do that last part recently, actually... My darkness can cause a feeling of unease, which I can amplify anywhere from 'prickling the back of your neck' uncomfortable to 'OMG RUN!' scary, to just plain making them pass out in terror. I don't really use that last one though, leaves behind a hell of a mess.

"Of course!" Trixie nodded frantically with a gulp, probably envisioning the different ways I could probably kill her... Or maybe she was thinking about spiders? I dunno. Maybe I should look into getting a pet... Maybe a bat? Nah...


And so the second duel begins and ends all too predictably... Good guys always win in the end, huh? Wonder if I can change that sometime... Nah, I don't feel like stirring this world up too much... Yet.

"Hey Jet?" Gilda said, getting my attention.

"Yeah Gilda?" I responded with a smile, turning towards her.

"What's that over there?" She asked, pointing at a spot behind me.

Craning my head, I looked "What's Wha-Ow!"

"Hah! You totally fell for it Jet!" Gilda crowed, grinning at her prank.

I grinned too... Evilly, as I advanced on her.

"Jet? ...Jet? JET!" She cried out before beginning to laugh hysterically as I pounced, my claws reaching around her neck... to gently tickle either side of it!

"THAT'S RIGHT! I KNOW YOUR WEAKNESS! MUAHHAHAHA!" I laughed, as I tickled her in retaliation. "Tremble before the power of-woah!" I cried out in shock as she managed to flip us over, now grinning down evilly at me as she huffed and puffed. As much as I usually love her evil grin, I have a bad feeling about this...

"Mercy?" I asked in a small voice.

"Hmmm..." Gilda looked as though she was considering it, "Sorry but it's a Monday, I don't have mercy on Mondays." And so she attacked.

"Y-you... You don't have mercy.. on ANY day!" I gasped out.

"I never said that I did... I just said that I don't have mercy on Mondays." She replied, smirking as she continued to tickle me into submission. Well, I can't fault her logic there...

With a heave, I managed to flip us again. "Than don't expect any mercy from-Woah!" And sent us rolling down a hill... The battle continues!

Ch 11: Friendship is Chaos!

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So I've decided to stretch my legs as a human again for a bit, and of course I need somepony to prank... Wonder where Lyra is? Hehehe...


"Get back here!!" Lyra screamed, chasing me through Ponyville. "I will have those HANDS!!! Bon-Bon'll see that I'm not Crazy!"

"Maybe in a million years!" I taunted back, "Besides, you definitely ARE crazy!" Yeah, she has some serious mental issues all right... I mean seriously, just listen to her ranting.

"And then I'll have you and your glorious hands to myself! Maybe I'll share you with Bon-Bon a bit, but you will be MINE!" Yeah... No. Somepony needs to get this mare a mental check... and maybe some therapy. She's getting way too creepy with this stuff now.

"Not Happening!" I replied before using my invisibility and intangibility to disappear, reappearing in front of a nearby shop in pegasi-form.

"LYRA!" Bon-Bon yelled angrily, stomping towards the mint-green unicorn. "You left the counter unattended, AGAIN!"

"B-but Bon-Bon, there was a human! Just ask anypony, they all saw me chasing him through the streets!" Lyra pleaded her case admirably, and it might've even saved her too! ...If I hadn't already stolen the memories of me from everypony in the area.

Even better for me that the first pony Bon-Bon turned to ask was me! MWuahahahaah-keh,*Cough Cough*... Ehem, anyways...

"Have you happened to have seen this supposed 'human' Lyra is talking about?" She asked skeptically, a brow already raised.

"Nope, haven't seen anything strange all day... aside from that unicorn running around and yelling something about 'hands'. Have you gotten her to a mental professional yet, or did she just escape from the crazy-house?" I responded with a grin.

Lyra's eyes widened, "IT WAS YOU!" She shouted, pointing at me. "You're the human! I recognize your voice!"

Now my eyes widened in shock, she recognized my voice!? I thought... Wait, no.. Okay I get it now. My voice is much different in Griffin-form, but I guess my Pony-form voice must sound just like my human voice... I wonder why? Meh, doesn't matter! Not like anypony's gonna believe her.

"So, a Mental Asylum Escapee it is!" I declared cheerfully, watching as an embarrassed Bon-Bon struggled to drag a squirming and cursing Lyra away from the area. "Have a nice Day!" I grinned, doing a spinning flourish with my right hoove before waving it.... Now a hand.

Lyra screamed something incomprehensible from the distance, before redoubling her efforts. Too easy... But hey, my powers are getting better by the day! I never would've been able to change only singular parts of my body before recently...

Quickly shifting back into Griffin-form, I took to the air looking for something else to do. "Hmm... Maybe I can replace all of Rarity's shampoo with green hair-dye?" I wondered, before seeing a sight that brought a menacingly large grin to my beak. "Well looky there! My boredom issues are probably solved now that Discord is here...." I chuckled.


I arrived just as Celestia finished her explanation, laughing as Spike acted the coward with the excuse of fetching the elements of harmony. Discord isn't even free yet, and I'm already having fun!

Now I just have to wait for the last two of six to arrive, and wait for Discord's de-stoning...


Cue motivational speech an- Holy Crap, Celestia's wingspan is about as big as mine!

Anyways... Rainbow lightshow, breaking stone, bada bing, bada boom, and freed chaos! Finally!

"What do you think you're doing!?" Twilight demanded after Discord turned a squirrel into a hulking beastly version of itself... With a heart tattoo! Hah! Wonder if it says 'I love Mom' or something... Maybe 'I eat nuts'? Oh-oh-oh! It probably says 'I love nuts'!

"Ooo~, Why Stretching of course!" Discord stated as if it were obvious, which it really was, as he continued to stretch. "When you're a creature of Chaos, Stone body-suits aren't your typical 'go-to fashion choice'" He added before stretching again, snapping a claw and turning yet another furry woodland creature into a monstrous version of itself.

Pinkie gasped, "Make that bunny cute again! Now!" She demanded.

Discord chuckled, "Oh~, but he's adorable the way he is..." He stated, tickling the monster-rabbit's chin just before it snapped at his paw. Discord stood up in a huff, blowing a raspberry at the creature with his snake-tongue. Turning back to the Mane Six, he looked at them. "You know what else is adorable? You ponies Truly believe that you can reform me..."

"And that you're putting your faith in this one here..." He continued, looking through a magnifying glass at Fluttershy "To make it happen..." He disappeared, reappearing on the other side of Fluttershy while wearing a stereo-typical old-time granny outfit. "Makes me want to pinch your little horsey cheeks!"

"How'd you know about that!?" Twilight demanded.

"Being turned to stone doesn't keep me from hearing every word Celestia says..." Discord deadpanned, "Although it does make rolling my eyes a challenge."

I'd step in to say something or something, but I'm a bit preoccupied laughing my flank off.

Twilight proceeded to threaten the entity of chaos, "Well unless you want us to turn you back to stone, you'll zap those animals back the way they were Pronto!"

I wanna think that Discord should've made a quip about calling him 'pronto' here...

"Oh you wouldn't dare turn me back to stone and risk disappointing your 'Precious Princess'..." Discord spat, using heavy sarcasm on the term 'precious princess'.

"Try us, Dipcord!" Rainbow Dash challenged.

Suspiciously close to dipstick... And actually that's a pretty funny play on his name, hehe.

And cue the Fluttershy lecture, "Bad Discord, don't treat poor defenseless animals like that or else 'The Stare' is coming your way!" Okay so that's not exactly what she said, but I don't feel like thinking about it all; so I think a summary should be good enough there.

Plenty of laughable theatrics about how the stare was 'Affecting' him, I actually fell off my cloud in laughter. "Oh this is great!" I wheezed and leaned on Discord for support as I laughed, and him doing the same.

"JET!" Twilight yelled, "You're not supposed to encourage him!"

"Well he's funnier than you, so too bad Sparklebutt!" I shot back after finishing my bout of hysterical laughter.

"Sparklebutt, oh that's a good one!" Discord laughed, pointing at Twilight with a claw and covering his eyes with the other paw. "I don't think we've been introduced, I'm Discord; Master of Chaos! And you are?" He asked with a grin, holding out a claw.

I shook his claw with a matching grin, "I'm Jet; a master prankster with many skills and abilities."

Discord's grin turned more mischievous, "Oh how wonderful! Always nice to meet a fellow prankster..." He replied, "You know, I think if you stick around me than you might learn a thing or two... I practically invented the art after all!"

"Learning or not, I think I'll be sticking around... It beats sitting around bored, that's for sure!" I replied, releasing the claw-shake we'd initiated.

"Hey! I'm talking over here!" Sparkleflank called angrily, "If it turns out we need to use our Elements Against you, I'm sure we can convince Princess Celestia that it was for a good reason!"

Discord sighed, "I suppose that's correct..." He replied, returning the two woodland creatures back to normal with a snap of his paw. Holding out his arms with an innocent grin, the 'hair' at the end of his tail formed into a hand-shape and snapped. "Oopsie..." He whispered with a grin.

"Well, it looks like I know where I'll be crashing while I'm being 'Re-formed'" He stated, making air quotes. "With you" -He made Fluttershy appear in his grasp- "Fluttershy..." He laughed.


"Huh, what's this?" I wondered, looking at the envelope dancing upon my beak. "A message from Discord?" I tapped the envelope, causing Discord's voice to float from it.

"Hello Jet, you and one guest are hereby chaotically invited to Dinner and a Show at Fluttershy's cottage! I'm sure you'll enjoy it quite thoroughly..." His voice said, mimicking a formal invitation.

"Well, I guess Gilda and I have plans for tonight now..." I chuckled.


"Jet? Gilda? What are you two doing here?" Twilight asked in disbelief.

"Discorded extended an invitation for me and a guest, so we're attending tonight's dinner..." I grinned.

"Great, just great..." Twilight muttered, facehoofing. "Not just one, but two major headaches are here tonight..."

Fluttershy's door opened, allowing Discord to step out garbed in a butler-like outfit. "Oh, our guests!" He uttered before spitting his tongue out, after which it rolled open as a red-carpet, and appearing at the end. "We're so delighted that you've come." He added, doing a low bow. He teleported back inside the doorway, "Please, do come in..."

After we'd all walked inside, Fluttershy began speaking. "See what a beautiful job he did helping? Discord set the entire table himself! I'm so proud!"

"He set more than the table..." I chuckled, remembering how small the cottage had been the last time I'd been inside it.

"May I take your... Ehehem... Hats girls?" He asked the six harmony-bearing ponies.

Twilight ducked away from his grasping paw, holding on to her tiara. "Hang on to your Elements girls, It's gonna be a bumpy night..."


And so here we are at dinner! Blahblahblah, Princess Sunbutt's expectations, yadayada... Oh, gravy!

Discord made the gravy boat come to life, "Ooo~, what a cute little Gravy boat you are! Yes you are, yes you are!" Pinkie cooed, rubbing the object like it was a dog.

"That's one creepy little gravy boat, if you ask me..." Rainbow said with a frown.

"Oh come on now Dashie, you aren't even giving this a chance..." Fluttershy replied.

"Hey!" Dash cried out, flying into the air after the gravy boat poured hot gravy on her. "That's hot!"

"Whoops, I'm so sorry" Discord apologized with a grin.

"He did that on purpose!" She accused.

"Well I don't know about that; I mean, Mistakes happen..."

"Hahhaa! Oh that's hilarious!" I laughed, beckoning the gravy boat over. "You're a funny little gravy boat, huh? Nice sense of humor." I complimented it, earning a nice helping of gravy on my potatoes.

"Oh look everypony, Dancing Candles~!" Discord exclaimed, changing the subject.

Spike looked pretty wowed at them, until Rainbow blew them out and continued to accuse Discord. "I'm not falling for that! Discord's just trying to distract us from- ah, uh, ah, Hey!" She yelled, as the put-out dancing candles began to assault her. "Knock it off! I suppose that's another 'mistake'?" She asked skeptically.

"No, I~ think you just made them mad..." Discord replied.

"There's something fishy going on..." Twilight commented, just to get sprayed by the fish-shaped soup terrine.

"Discord?" Fluttershy asked, looking at said chaos creature.

"Well it's hardly my fault if the soup terrine finds the term 'Something Fishy' to be offensive..." He defended himself, using air quotes.

"Not the dress, NOT THE DRESS!!" Rarity screamed, causing Gilda and I to laugh.

"Oh this is the best dinner show ever!" I said with a grin.

"Yeah, it's pretty funny." Gilda agreed, drinking from her cup.

"That terrine's only doing what yer makin' it do!" Applejack said as she got sprayed.

"Now let's not jump to any conclusions..." Fluttershy said as Discord stifled his laughter, and turned to him. Discord immediately stopped laughing, holding out his arms in a shrug.

"Fluttershy, can't you see what he's doing!? He's playing innocent with you so you'll never agree to use your Element of Harmony against him!" Dash accused, just before getting served by the soup terrine.

"Oh, well... that's a bit harsh, isn't it?" Discord replied with a small frown.

"We'd better finish our dinner before things escalate..." I whispered to Gilda with a grin.


"Hey there Fluttershy, you want a turn? The water's great!" Discord waved from where he was water skiing, pulled by two soup-terrines. "Fluttershy, oh there you are! A sight for sore eyes..."

"As you can see, there's a big mess down here at Sweet apple acres..." Fluttershy told him.

"Oh yes, awful business, that..." He replied, toweling off.

Cue Fluttershy lecture about how this was because of his reckless behavior and such, telling him to fix it. Cue Discord agreeing, as long as she would agree to never use her Element against him... And finally, cue her agreement.

"Excellent!" Discord cried out happily, snapping a claw and freezing the water over. "There! Much better~! I do prefer ice skating to water skiing~, don't you?" He asked, passing by a stand with two Discords, me, and Gilda. He received two tens from the Discords, another from me, and an 8.5 from Gilda.

"What? Oh come on, that was worth more than 8.5..." Discord protested.

"Eh, the last landing was a bit wobbly." Gilda explained with a shrug, the other two Discords making a 'kinda-sorta' motion of semi-agreement with their heads.

"Discord!" Fluttershy cried out angrily, "That's not fixing it!" She began running at him across the ice. "Why I outta-!" And slid right past him.

"Where are you going?" Discord asked with a grin as she passed by. "What's wrong pal?"

"Don't call me your pal!" Fluttershy responded angrily.

"Wow; Buttercup Quiverhooves has a bit of bite to her after all, huh Jet?" Gilda asked rhetorically, elbowing me slightly.


"Oh~... Come skating with me, and we'll let bygones be bygones!" Discord offered, holding out a pair of pony-skates with his tail.

"Here you go Fluttershy!" Spike said, offering Fluttershy her Element of Harmony after a surprisingly skillful skating display. "Game on!"

"He fixes this, or he goes back to being Stone!" Twilight called from the side. Princess Celestia will understand!"

"Oh this is getting good! What do you think she'll do now Jet?" Gilda wondered with a grin.

"Hah, I already know what she's gonna do." I said, whispering what'll happen next to Gilda.

"Really?" She asked skeptically. "I don't think she has the guts to be that assertive on anything..."

"Well, we'll see about that." I replied with a knowing smile.

"I made a promise not to use my Element against him, and I'm going to keep it." Fluttershy decided at last, taking the pony-skates.

I smirked at Gilda, "Fine so you were partially right, big deal. It's not like she has the guts to do the other thing you said." She growled.

"Haha~! You see?" Discord exclaimed, "She wants to have fun with me because we're friends! She can't use the Elements against me because we're friends! I'm free forever!" He laughed.

"Not! Your! Friend!" Fluttershy responded angrily, throwing the skates away.

Gilda grumbled angrily as I smirked smugly at her... "OW!" Heh, she never likes being proved wrong.

"Who cares?" Discord responded, "I can do whatever I want, whenever I want! I'm Discord, the Master of Chaos!" He teleported behind Fluttershy, skating slowly behind her as she angrily walked away. "You think you can boss Discord around? You think I'm just going to turn all this back because you say so? Because if I don't, I'll lose the one best friend I ever had?"

Suddenly a look of realization dawned on him, "Huh..." He looked at the skates abandoned on the ice, "Oh... Well played Fluttershy... Well played." He made his way over to a treetop and sat down, turning everything back to normal.

The ponies all cheered as Discord teleported in, "I like it better my way, but I guess when you're friends... You can't exactly have things your way all the time."

I laughed, "Just wait until you get into a romantic relationship Discord, then you almost never get things your way!" I joked, "Remember, the significant other in your life is always right... even when she's wrong. Ow!" I rubbed my arm. "See? That's what happens when you tell your girlfriend she's wrong. Ow!"

Everypony, and Discord, all laughed at my poor and abused arm's misfortune.

Ch 12: The Summoning

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"Ugh..." Of all the things that could've happened today, waking up on a stone floor covered in symbols was not one of them. The last thing I remember, I had everyone laughing about Gilda punching my arm.. Which doesn't seem all that funny now that I think about it.

"You fools!" A voice shouted, somewhere off to my right, "Who messed up their part of the ritual!? Was it you Runebreaker!?"

"N-no! We did everything exactly like the book said to, sir..." another responded meekly

"Well then, if we did everything exactly right.." The first voice began calmly, "THEN WHY IS THERE A GRYPHON ON THE FLOOR!?" He yelled angrily, "That ritual should have called to us a being of great power, not some random gryphon!"

"Dude, shut the hell up! You're giving me a damn headache!" I snapped at the first voice, opening my eyes somewhat blearily.

"Excuse me?" The first voice, now revealed to be a dark blue unicorn with a red spiky mane, responded angrily. "Do you even realize how you've messed this ritual up?!"

I slowly stood up and began to stretch, rolling my eyes at the guy. "Seriously, tone it down." I looked around, "Where am I?"

The other voice, Runebreaker I think it was, stepped in. "You're in a safehouse near the everfree-" The unicorn -go figure to answered, somewhat somberly. There were other unicorns in the room, but they were really just background for the most part, didn't even try and speak up. Then again, maybe they were afraid of me?

"Don't bother answering his questions Runebreaker, he doesn't need to know anything" The other unicorn cut in angrily, "All that time, wasted! Just to summon a gryphon.. If I'd wanted a gryphon, I'd have hired another one from the Sharpwing Mercenaries!"

Glaring at the rude unicorn, I did a quick swirl and turned into a perfect copy of him, "Oh blah blah blah, I'm angry, listen to me, I'm a total jerkwad, wa wa wa." I mocked him, making derpy (No offence to that lovably cute pony) faces.

"W-what sorcery is this?" The unicorn sputtered, "Gryphons can't shapeshift! They can't even use magic!"

I gave him the slow clap for that one, "Wow, way to go chucklebeak! You figured it out, bravo." I quickly swirled back into my Gryphon form, rolling my eyes. "Well this has been fun but I've got a girlfriend to get back to, and she's probably pretty pissed at me for disappearing, so.. Later!"

I quickly flap my wings, turning intangible and flying through the ceiling despite the protests of the unicorns and their calls to wait. Once I made it through the stone and into the night sky above, I looked around and noted that I actually was near the edge of the everfree. "Alright, so they weren't lying about that at least.. Time to head home."

I was about to fly off, when I noticed something weird.. The ruins of the old Castle in the forest were gone - well... No, they weren't gone, but the castle itself looked new and gleaming.. And it was blue. As much as I like my red and black color scheme - it works for a gryphon, I think - I've always been a sucker for blue stuff. So, being that as it was, I flew over to investigate.


Walking in the doors, I looked around 'ooo'ing and 'ahh'ing at the decorations. "Nice place here, liking the colors." I commented, "Wonder when the sisters decided to renovate this place.. And why I didn't notice."

"Hey! You there, Gryphon!" A night guard called out, pointing at me. "The castle isn't open for visitors! Get out!"

Rolling my eyes, I flipped the guard the bird - heh, a bird flipping the bird. Not like they know what it means anyways. -, "Hey pal, I can go wherever I want. You want me out? Try and stop me."

The guard glared, running at me. "I'm not your pal, scum! The Princess will have your head for this!"

"Princess?" I wondered aloud, allowing the guard to run straight through me, "You act like there's only one princess, and you're a night guard. Get with the times pal, Princess Luna came back - she and Celestia both rule now."

The guard stood up from where they had run headlong into the wall, turning to glare at me. "How dare yo-"

"Enough!" A voice called from across the room, cutting the guard off and causing him to bow in the direction of the voice. Several guards marched out, surrounding me. "Tell me Gryphon, why have you come to my castle? Another doomed assassin sent on a fool's errand?"

Turning, I caught sight of Nightmare Moon of all ponies sitting on a throne. "Nightmare Moon? Uh.." I blinked a few times, "Okay, am I dreaming now or what?"

"This is no dream, though I could easily make it your worst nightmare.." The corrupted Alicorn of Night responded, glaring slightly. "You test my patience Gryphon, why are you here?"

I shrugged, still confused as hell but deciding to go with it. "Wish I knew 'your majesty'." I replied, making air quotes. "Woke up in some sort of ritual room, flew through the roof, and saw a pretty blue castle. The rest is history."

She made a face of mild amusement, "You saw 'A pretty blue castle'.." She chuckled slightly, "You really are a simple-minded creature, aren't you? No matter, to the dungeons with him!"

One of the guard attempted to grab me, his hoof passing right through my arm. "Jeeze, rude!" I exclaimed, smacking the guy's helmet hard enough to spin it on backwards. He began stumbling a bit, trying to right the thing, causing me to laugh. "Hah! Dude, you look ridiculous!"

"Princess, my apologies for not immediately informing you about the intruder.." The guard that first saw me spoke up, "This gryphon appears to be able to make himself intangible at will. I have.. firsthoof experience with it.." He grimaced slightly and rubbed his muzzle, likely remembering his impact with the wall.

"Hey, how do you guys wear this crap?" I asked, having stolen one of the guards helmets and attempted to put it on. "Did I just grab the wrong size?"

"Hmph, very well then. I will simply escort it down there myself." The Princess responded as if that had been her plan all along, ignoring what she conceived to be 'gryphon idiocy'. Her magic, however, released me as quickly as she had used it to grab me. "What are you doing Creature!?" She exclaimed in surprise, "You are obviously not a Gryphon, what are you? I know of no creature that can turn intangible and drain magic." Nightmare Moon eyed me warily at this point.

"Jeeze, can't a guy just get a break around here?" I asked to nobody in particular, "I'm walking around with my girlfriend, then next thing I know I'm waking up on the floor with someone talking about a ritual, and now I've got to worry about Nightmare Moon? Come on!"

"Answer me creature!" The villainess demanded, "What are you?"

"Why, I'm Princess Luna of course!" I exclaimed, whirling into a perfect copy of Luna. "Actually wait, I'm Discord!" I quickly whirled into his form, "Chaos and all that! Mwahaha! Chocolate Milk! Cotton Candy! Fluttershy!" I whirled into my human form, falling over laughing. "Ah~, I've wanted to make that joke for a while... Even if nobody else is going to find it funny."

"What trickery is this!?" She then noticed her subjects staring at her and calmed down, "Leave us, I must speak with this creature alone."

"By your will, Princess." Her subjects chorused, bowing and leaving the room nearly in synch.

"Like a bunch of well trained dogs, nice." I asked with a grin as the last of them stepped from the room.

The 'Princess' stepped down from her throne, moving to circle me with a critical eye. "What are you?" She asked wearily, ignoring the comment about the guards.

"I'm the son of Discord and Chrysalis." I lied, hardly keeping a straight face. "So whatcha up to, wanting to rule Equestria or something?" I laughed.

"Fool!" She drew herself up to her full height, flaring her wings out for effect. "I am Nightmare Moon, I already rule Equestria!" The pony of the night looked out the window, "There have been none who could oppose me ever since I trapped my sister within the celestial body above."

"You put Celestia in moon jail?" I whistled a bit, "Harsh."

"It is no less than the punishment she placed upon me!" The Nightmare snapped before calming down. "Now.. what to do with you."

"Yeah, well, this has been fun and all.. but I've gotta go find my girlfriend." I said, rolling my eyes. I began to whirl into gryphon form so that I could fly through the roof like that last place, but quickly found myself knocked into a wall before I could. "Ugh.. What the heck?"

"Do you really think you're the first creature I've ever fought that could turn itself intangible? I've discovered ways around such a defence." Nightmare said smugly, "You have two choices creature... Join me or Perish."

Ch 13: A Da-err.. Night in Captivity

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"Ugh.." I groaned, regaining my consciousness, "Wha? I'm not dead?" I wondered, my mind struggling to understand what was going on through the fog in my brain. Attempting to rub at my head produced a rattling noise, to which I looked over and noticed that my hands were currently shackled to a wall. "What happened? How long have I been out?"

The last thing I remember was a steel covered hoof colliding with my head..

"Hey, Prisoner!" A pony in light blue plate armor called through the bars of what must be my cell, "Shut up, nopony wants to hear your bitching."

"Good morning!" Another pony, this one in a darker blue plate armor, called cheerfully. He doesn't exactly sound all there.. "How was your nap?"

"Caboose, I swear to Nightmare, I will stab you if you don't shut up!" a pony wearing a light blue plate armor said angrily, looking over at his 'partner'.

"Don't worry, Church is really nice. He's just grumpy." 'Caboose' said. "Someone, and, um.. I'm not naming names~..." The pony looked back and forth slightly, "But someone may have maybe accidentally stabbed him during training."

"Yeah! It was you, you buck!" 'Church' exclaimed angrily.

"Tucker did it!" The darker blue clad pony exclaimed.

"Hey, what the hay man?!" A voice called as a turquoise-green plate-armor clad pony stuck their head into view. "Caboose, you can't just blame me for everything!"


You've got to be shitting me.

No. No. No bucking way.

-------

"Gah!" I woke up with a start, my arms pulling at the manacles attaching them to the walls. Looking around frantically, I didn't see any signs of the ponies. "Phew, just a dream.." I said with some relief. "I really thought there were Red vs. Blue ponies for a bit there..."

"Red vs. Blue?" A familiar voice questioned. Looking up, I saw Nightmare giving me a curious look through the bars of my cell. " Pray tell, what exactly would that be?"

I shrugged, rattling the chains a bit. "Just something from my culture. Absolutely love it, but the real thing would probably drive me nuts."

"I see..." The dark Alicorn eyed me for a moment, contemplating something. "What exactly are thou?"

I rolled my eyes, "This again? Why should I answer you?"

I immediately regretted those words as Nightmare's horn flashed and a searing pain lanced through my entire body, tearing a pained scream from my throat and leaving me panting in exhaustion after what felt like ages.

"It would be wise not to test me creature." The tyrant declared, "For I could very easily make this dreamspace into your worst nightmare, and force thee to endure it time and time again." She looked smug, "I need not actually harm you to break you. So what say thee creature? Will you cooperate?"

I glared at her, "Pick a speech pattern dammit!" I exclaimed, "Either speak modern english or ye olde english, that switching back and forth crap is going to get on my nerves real fast."

"Insolent fool!" Nightmare thundered, causing me another bout of pain. Her gaze softened slightly, a small smirk finding its way onto her muzzle. "I shall leave thee for now. Perhaps thou will be in a more agreeable mood after a bit of isolation." She began to walk away, her hoofsteps echoing on the stone floor. Shortly after, I could hear the sound of a door slamming and then locking.

Perfect. I chuckled slightly as I phased my arms out of the chains, "I can't believe she forgot about that." I got up, stretching slightly and taking a moment to get reacquainted with my original center of gravity. "I really kind of ditched my original body pretty quickly now that I think about it..." I shrugged, "Oh well, is what it is."

Walking through the bars, I - "OW, MOTHERBUCKER!" Crashed right into the bars and nearly broke my nose. "HOLY @#!#@! SON OF A $%# WITH A SIDE OF #@% AND $#%$#%$#% $#%#$ %$#% $#%#$%$#%$#!!" It really didn't hurt all that bad, just surprised and annoyed the heck out of me. That pain thing Nightmare did? That hurt.

"Well crap, I guess she didn't forget after all.." I examined the bars on my cell, attempting to bend them. "Hrrg! HRERGEGREGJRGBURGER! Random exclamations of effort!" Huh, this isolation must be getting to me faster than I thought. It's just so quiet in here..

"Well, this thing isn't bending any time soon..." I looked at the lock, "Maybe if I.." I sprouted a crystal from my palm and inserted it into the lock, willing it to grow into the available space. After a moment or two, I tried turning the crystal and.. "Eureka! Freedom!" I stepped out of my cell, breathing the same stale, non-fresh, not-outdoors air. "Well, sort of."

Walking in the direction the nightmare had gone, I faced my final obstacle... A large wooden door, edged with some sort of metal and runes. "Alright door, it's you or me." I said, "Only one of us is making it through this, and it's gonna be mei- I mean ME." Attempting the same crystal trick, I... Absolutely failed.

"Well... Shit." I said, looking at the broken crystal in my hand. "Uh.." I scratched my head slightly. "How about.." I faded into mist and attempted to slide under the crack in the door, before being repelled by an invisible force. "Ow!" And also being forced back into human form to crash face-first into the unforgiving ground.

"Fine, plan D then!" I closed my eyes and concentrated on the door, imagining the key to the door and then... I imagined myself stealing the key. A weight settled into my hand and I looked down to see the key. "Hell yeah!" I exclaimed, moving to put the key in the... oh..

"SHITAKI MUSHROOMS!" I swore, looking at the crystal filled lock. "Okay, maybe...-Crap!" There were hoofsteps coming back down the hall! I made a mad dash back to my cell, swinging the door closed and phasing back into my manacles.

Nightmare Moon strolled back into the room like she owned the place (Though, to be fair, she kinda did.). She raised a brow as she entered, probably noticing my cell door swinging slightly ajar and my completely innocent whistling. "Creature, thou will find escape from mine prison to be impossible." She said, sounding more amused than anything else. "If thee wishes to leave, 'tis simply a matter of asking."

"So... Can I leave?" I asked hopefully - Maybe she isn't so bad after all.

"Of course!" The dark mare nodded, "Simply swear fealty to me, and you shall be free to explore mine palace."

"Wait..." I raised a brow, "Is that a euphemism? 'Cause I already have a girlfriend... Even if she probably thinks I'm dead or something."

The dreaded Alicorn of the Night, the Mistress of Shadows, the Moon Tyrant... Blushed. "Perverted Fiend!" She boomed.

"Wait a minute, who's the fiend here?" I wondered, "Because I'm pretty sure you're the one who's got me tied up in your freaky little dungeon."

"Tis not a 'freaky' dungeon." The Nightmare insisted.

"Sure~ it's not.." I said sarcastically.

"It is NO- wait, why am I arguing with you?" She shook her head, "You will not distract me with your mind games creature."

"Games? I love games, how about a rousing game of Monopoly? You can be the car!" I said happily, enjoying the sudden control I had over the conversation.

The Nightmare shook her head, "I've attempted to gain your allegiance through persuasion, but I grow tired of this." She charged up some sort of spell with her horn, "Good bye Creature, thou shalt share in Mine sister's fate."

Ch 14: Walking on Sunshine

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"Cool, I've always wanted to go to the moon!" My exclamation caught Nightmare off guard slightly, as her horn stopped glowing for a moment.

"You are a rather simple creature, aren't you?" She asked disdainfully, "To think that one such as you could be considered a threat should be laughable, but I cannot leave anything to chance. My night shall last FOREVER!"

I covered my ears in pain "Gah! Learn some volume control, Jeeze!"

"Don't worry little creature, where you're going will be very quiet." Her horn began glowing again.

"Go ahead, send me to the moon!" I said with a grin, "You may be the night, but I am the moon!"

Nightmare Moon shook her head, "Disregarding that ridiculous statement, I'm not sending you to the moon. I'm sending you into the sun, to give my wretched sister some company." A twisted fanged grin stretched across her muzzle, "Though I'm not sure how much company a roasting corpse will be."

"NOPE!" I yelled suddenly, bolting for the door. I sure as hell don't want to go to the sun - at least with the Moon I could probably just fly back down!

...Okay, stupid thought I know. Several hundred thousand miles or so is still a bit much. I was in panic!

I made it out the door Nightmare foolishly left open, ran through the castle, and continued out into the forest fairly quickly, Nightmare's laughter following me the whole way. "Jeeze.. I can't believe it was that easy.." I wheezed, "Okay, wow, I need to run more often.."

"A pathetic escape attempt, for a pathetic creature." Wait what?

The forest around me melted away, being replaced by the same dungeon I was previously in, with Nightmare Moon looking rather smug. "Wut?!"

"You haven't figured it out? You're asleep, you fool. By the time you wake up, you shall already be in the Sun." She gloated before blasting me with a magic beam.


"Gah!" I woke up in a cold sweat.. No, wait, it's a warm sweat. Really warm, who left the oven o- oh...

"Well I must admit, I am surprised to see another end up here." Celestia commented with a raised brow. "And shocked to find another capable of withstanding the full might of the sun."

"Uh.." I looked around in confusion, noticing nothing but fire around us. "The sun's core is solid? Huh, I thought it was just gas." I stood up, trying to peer into the distance

Celestia inclined a brow elegantly, "Why in Faust's name would the sun be made of gas?" She shook her head, a limp pink mane following her movements. "That is simply ridiculous."

"The only thing ridiculous around here is... uh.." I scratched my head slightly, noting the manacles clanking slightly. "Well I had something clever, but I lost it. So.. These manacles?" I asked, phasing my arms though them and allowing them to clank to the fiery ground. "Seriously, why don't those melt?"

If Celestia was shocked, she hid it very well. "They were made specifically to hold me, meaning that they can resist Sun's heat."

I rolled my eyes, "So.. Moony thought she could chain me up with chains made specifically for you?" I wondered aloud. "That's.. Pretty stupid." Celestia only shrugged.

"So.. How long have you been here?" I asked.

"Oh, a couple of years or so." She replied easily, "It's a little hard to keep track of time from the sun, though I certainly do miss my tea.. And cake."

Thinking about it, I tried to stea- summon a cup of tea for her, but... Well, it evaporated the second it materialized. Not the tea, well the tea too, but the whole damn cup- poof, up in smoke.

"What exactly was that?" Celestia wondered, having seen the slight puff of smoke. Believe it or not, the flames here aren't blinding or obscuring anything in any way. Speaking of ease of sight, I'm just now noticing I was forced into my normal self.. And my clothes aren't fireproof.

I quickly turned away from Celestia with a slight blush and sat down before answering, "Well I was trying to get a cup of tea here, but it evaporated.

"I see.."

Not wanting questions about why I turned away, or if she saw my blush as I realized my nudity, I quickly shifted back into my griffon form. I turned back to Celestia, and a different set of questions. "So you can shapeshift?"

I shrugged, "Yeah, part of my powers." I think I like this Celestia better than the first one I met. Maybe I should grab Gilda and we can live here. Well, obviously not here-here, I don't think she'd like the sun very much. Well, maybe the sun, but not living on the sun. Lots of open space and I'm sure the winter heating is dirt cheap, but there's really not enough trees, grass, clouds, food, water... oh, and the year-round temperature would probably be a problem for her too.

"Do you have anything else that might help us out of this.. Situation?" She questioned curiously.

"Well.. I can probably get you out of those chains and I can control the sun and moon." I answered slowly, thinking things over. I doubt any Celestia would be very understanding about the ability to steal literally anything, and Shadow and Crystal powers are probably useless here. Hide behind and Cheshire powers are basically useless, aside from the intangibility.

Celestia grinned like an internet troll, "I may have an idea."

Ch 15: And the award for best acting goes to...

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It was a beautiful morning, the sun was shining, the birds were chirping, th- wait.. "WHAT IS THE MEANING OF THIS!?" Nightmare Moon screamed furiously, looking out of her window to see her moon lowering out of sight and her wretched sister's Sun rising over the horizon. "Rebels? No, who could possibly.. The methods for moving the sun and moon had long since been lost to all but Celestia and myself, so who..?"

"No matter how big the group, they are no match for an Alicorn." Nightmare murmured, spreading her wings and flaring her power in an attempt to regain control, but for all her magical might, she found herself unable to so much as halt one of the celestial bodies. "impossible.." Nightmare paced as she mulled over the possibilities. "No group of unicorns has enough power to keep us from wrenching away control.. Even our sister wouldn't be able to stop us from moving the moon as we please."

"My sister.." She paused, "But that's impossible. She's chained, her powers gone, there's no way.." Nightmare glared at the sun, still slowly rising into the sky. "But we had best make certain." Her horn glowed with a bright light and a flash lit her chambers, leaving them empty


The first thing Nightmare noticed was her sister, sitting upon the surface of the sun and looking exactly as she left her and, glancing over, she also noticed the empty set of chains nearby. "We see the creature couldn't handle the fires of the sun." Nightmare gloated, a grin splitting her muzzle in amusement. "Tell us Sister, how was it? Listening to its screams as it was cooked alive and burnt to ashes? The first of your company in a very long time."

Much to Nightmare's annoyance, her sister simply looked at her with a raised brow before sighing and shaking her head in... disappointment? "Don't pull the disappointed older sister routine with us Celestia!" Nightmare growled out before shaking her head and calming herself. "We suppose we knew it wouldn't be you who moved our moon and your sun, after all you could never escape those chains." She monologues gleefully.

Nightmare grinned viciously as Celestia looked up in interest, "But not to worry. We'll find whatever little resistance that formed and break them." She studied Celestia's face, expecting despair for her little ponies, finding only... Defiance? "Oh, the fires in your eyes! we see your little visitor must have somehow rekindled your flames." Nightmare laughed maniacally. "We'll be sure to send what's left of this little resistance up later, a nice little gift from us to you. After all, you like incense right?"

Nightmare, now in a much better mood, lit her horn to leave. A flash, muted by how brightly lit the sun already was, appeared briefly.. but Nightmare was still there. "W-What?!"

"Surprised, dear sister?" A voice that she knew all too well whispered... right into her ear.

Nightmare shrieked slightly as she whirled around and backpedaled from.. "CELESTIA!?" She glanced over, seeing that Celestia was still chained up, and yet she was also in front of her. "W-WHAT?! T-two? BUT HOW!!?"

"Oh sister, you didn't think I wouldn't have a backup plan did you?" Celestia tutted, shaking her head. "I'm surprised at you."

Nightmare's fear quickly turned to anger. "I beat you once and I can do so again!"

Celestia tilted her head with a grin, "Oh but you only won by sealing me away.. Besides.." The other Celestia stood up, walking forward. Nightmare watched in muted horror as the chains holding her down strained slightly before snapping and crumbling away. "Can you beat us both?"

"Come sister.." The twin Alicorns spoke, "Let us help you see the light once more." They smiled a horrible wide smile. "Let's get that parasite out of you."

"NEVER!" Nightmare screamed, firing a blast of magic into their faces. She panted slightly at the sheer amount of magic she had poured into the beam, before snapping her head up at the sounds of giggling. She paled in horror as the two Celestia were still standing there, once in pristine condition and the other.. A horrendous rendition of Celestia, a mane like fire and fangs much like her own. Twin eyes burning as fierce as the sun, looking at her as though she was nothing more than a speck of dust before her.

"Come now sister." A warped voice spoke condescendingly from that fanged maw, "Thou shouldst know better than to simply pour magic into thy attack."

"That's Lulu for you, always a battering ram with combat magic." Celestia spoke up, amused. "Perhaps we should re-educate her on proper battle magic.

Nightmare took off, attempting to fly away and lose them in the flames. She needed to get away!

The two Alicorns watched as Nightmare flew away, one giggling and the other laughing maniacally.


"Oh man, that was great!" I laughed, watching as Nightmare disappeared from view. I could still tell exactly where she was though, thanks to my connection with the sun.

"It was very amusing." Celestia continued to giggle daintily for only a moment, before breaking out into great guffaws of laughter. "Oh I haven't played such a great prank in ages!" Her laughter subsided for a moment as she turned to eye me. "So what exactly inspired something like.." She gestured to me. "This?"

I glanced down at myself, taking in the fire curling around my neck and feeling the fangs with my tongue. "To be honest I just tried pulling energy from the sun and gathering it, this kind of happened on its own." It was really strange to have fangs big enough to show with my mouth closed... Then again, it was always a bit weird when I shape-shifted. Walking on four legs, having a muzzle, having a beak, all odd experiences until you get used to them.

"Hmm.." Celestia had a pensive look as she scrutinized my new form. "Interesting. I never thought about pulling energy from my connection with the sun before." She concentrated slightly before, in a flash of fire, her form warped as well. "Interesting indeed.." Celestias warped voice spoke, before she turned back. "I don't think that I like it much, however." the Alicorn of the Sun spoke playfully as she rolled her shoulders slightly, "It feels rather uncomfortable."

I chuckled, "That's fine.. So, you wanna go purify your sister or whatever now?"

Celestia smiled, "Thank you, that would be wonderful." Her horn glowed and we disappeared in a flash.


"Two Celestias?" Nightmare spoke hysterically as she paced back and forth in an empty area of the sun, "That shouldn't be possible! And what was with that other one, she shouldn't have.. she can't have.." Her horn lit up and sputtered out a few times, "And why can't I teleport!?" She stopped moving suddenly, though not by choice.

"Oh dear Lulu.." A warped voice spoke as Nightmare was wrapped in a golden aura of magic. "We've found you~"

"No! NO!" Nightmare struggled, her horn sputtering as she tried and failed to cast any sort of magic. "HOW!? HOW IS THIS HAPPENING!?

"Don't worry dear sister.." Celestia spoke gently as she restrained her sister, "It will all be over soon, and we can go back to the way things should be."

The nightmarish form of the warped Celestia moved closer. "No! STAY AWAY!" Nightmare screamed, panicking as she continued to fail to do anything more than make her horn light up slightly.

"Don't worry.. I'll make this fast." The warped alicorn said, reaching out and pressing a hoof against Nightmare's chest... before reaching further in, her hoof continuing as though intangible. She seemed to rummage around a bit before finally withdrawing her hoof, some sort of squirming darkness drawn out with it as Nightmare went limp.

The dark mass shrieked and squirmed as it tried to get away, Nightmare's form melting away from the unconscious Luna to reveal her normal Alicorn form. "Now to deal with you.." A fanged maw opened, the shrieking darkness struggling as it was deposited within and consumed.

"You are quite the showmare." Celestia teased as she continued to hold her sister in her magical grip, protecting her unconscious form from the environment around them.

I shuddered slightly as I let go of the power from the sun and shifted into the form of a male alicorn, going with white fur, a black mane, and a cutie mark like a Yin-Yang symbol. "I'd prefer showman, showperson, showpony, literally anything other than what you just said."

Celestia raised a brow as she glanced at me, "Interesting choice of form."

I shrugged and ruffled my wings a bit, "I got used to all these extra appendages, what can I say?" To be perfectly honest, I'm just being lazy and made myself more comfortable rather than totally shifting forms "So now what?"

Celestia smiled, "Now we go and clean up my sisters mess."

"We?" I questioned curiously, not having expected to be dragged into it.

"Well, you are using the form of an Alicorn." She gestured around, "Unless you'd rather stay here?"

I rolled my eyes and shrugged, "Alright fine." I chuckled and spoke just before her horn flashed with a teleport spell, "You know, I definitely like you better than the last Celestia I met."