1. Member Since 11th Dec, 2011
  2. offline for 14m, 32s

Be excellent to each other, and PARTY ON, DUDES! ~ Abraham Lincoln

Who the Hell is THIS Guy?

Heya, folks! I'm Jake The Army Guy! I call myself that because my name is Jake, I'm in the US Army, and... well, I think you can figure out the rest. :ajsmug:

I'm a Public Affairs Broadcast Journalist, meaning I make radio and TV news for the Army, in addition to handling public relations. I like to play drums, video games, and occasionally write about ponies. I also do fan fiction reviews and a bunch of other stuff for FOB Equestria, Home of the Military Brony, and mod a few groups over on Facebook. Ain't I interesting?

Flame Fuel(shamelessly ripped off from Bad_Seed_72):

Politics: Independent Conservative

Religion: Christian Universalist

Best Character: Spike

Best Pony: Applejack

Best filly: Babs Seed

Preferred Ships: MacDash, SoarinJack, SweetieSpike

People Who Make Me Not Suck:

Golden Vision


Piquo Pie

I also do pre-reading/editing for people who I feel need it/ask me nicely. By all means, drop me a line if you want my advice, but I may be too busy.

Random Shite:

Favorite Movie: Die Hard

Favorite TV Show: Doctor Who

Favorite Video Game: Resident Evil 4

Favorite Band: Metallica


Howdy howdy, everyone! First and foremost, as always, adorable Applejack:

Now with bonus Adorable Twilight!

Now then. As it says, tomorrow there will be yet another installment of what I hope to be a monthly drunk livestream. Returning this month will be Captain Unstoppable, Archonix, and Professor Plum. Sadly, Aquaman will not be joining us due to being a lil beeyotch having a prior engagement. However, we have added bonuses this time! Joining us will be the adorable The Masked Ferret, playing the role of Drunk Wrangler since she doesn't drink, and Megapone/Golden Vision, who will be playing the part of Distracted by XCOM2 and Giant Horse Dongs. Expect drunken shenanigans, miniature horse discussion, and expletives as Geeves gets his tender butthole raped by aliens.

This stream also marks a special occasion, as tomorrow is my... ugh, 31st birthday. Fuck, I'm getting old. But anywho! Link will be posted to a new blog when the stream starts, around 8:00 PM Eastern time tomorrow. As per last time, please leave any questions or topics you would like discussed below. Thanks, and hope to see you there!

Until then stay safe, stay free, and stay metal! Jake The Army Guy out!

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#742 · 1w, 3d ago · 1 · ·

Because Judas-Fucking-Priest cover, that's why.

#741 · 1w, 4d ago · · ·

>>2180304 This... This has brought me to enlightenment. Truly, That Which Must Not Be Named ... Ah, who the fuck am I kidding?


#738 · 2w, 1d ago · · ·


Um... C-Cool story, bro?

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My Stuff(if you care to read)

  • Under A Luminous Sky Twilight and an investigator from Canterlot must catch a killer by Jake The Army Guy 99,866 words · 6,247 views · 525 likes · 22 dislikes
  • Finding Your Place Spike is no longer the chubby baby dragon he was, and he no longer has to go through his hundred-year wyrm sleep. But as he and Twilight move back to Canterlot, Spike finds that his new larger body means the end of his old life. by Jake The Army Guy 84,727 words · 4,088 views · 376 likes · 17 dislikes
  • Button Thrash Button Mash gets caught in a mosh. by Jake The Army Guy 2,128 words · 807 views · 81 likes · 11 dislikes