Exiled to Equestria by the Time Lords to 'keep him out of trouble', the Doctor, now in his 22nd incarnation, finds himself forced to stay in one place, with the same ponies, forever and ever and ever. Socially, however, the Doctor is a dead loss; the inevitable result of locking yourself in a small box for hundreds of years at a time. This occasionally results in amusing scenarios. This is a collection of such, and will be updated as and when and if I feel like it.

Technically, this is a follow-up to my earlier Doctor Whooves stories, but as they're rubbish, I shouldn't bother if I were you. The premise here is fairly self-explanatory, and you shouldn't need more than a cursory knowledge of Doctor Who to be able to see what's going on.

Chuckles tells us why, despite everything, he's still a clown. It has to do with meeting Fluttershy when she was just a filly. It's fairly cute, in its way.

An instantly regretted bet with Luna leads to Celestia doing one of the most ill-advised things it's possible for anypony to ever do, ever.

This story is a sequel to Somepony Tries to Sell Twilight Insurance

Ponies were very surprised when Jackpot Enterprises' managing director, Crystal Jackpot himself, started allowing Ponyville's richest residents to insure their properties with his company - not least because the last thing anypony ever expected was that Jackpot Enterprises would do something enterprising. However, they were even more surprised when a crippling blow was dealt the idea by none other than Princess Twilight Sparkle.
Not only did she not have her castle insured: she also urged every single one of her friends - her rich, powerful friends - not to take insurance out either. Nopony would suggest that Jackpot was a resentful stallion - nopony who didn't want to find himself homeless within the week, anyway - but it was, all the same, surprising for Twilight when just about everypony she knew took out insurance against, er, her.

After his little... er... misunderstanding with Tirek, Discord seemed eager to attone for his crimes. That's why Princess Celestia decided that perhaps it wouldn't be such a terrible idea to give him a little job. Well, never mind. Now that he's figured out that the job wasn't really all it seemed, what's the worst the all-powerful Master of Chaos could do?

Ballpoint Smudge has one job. It's not an easy one, but it's one he's determined to do to the best of his ability. The only problem is that as soon as he meets Twilight Sparkle, everything he's ever learned about princesses goes flying out of the window. He was expecting her to be regal, haughty and bossy. Instead she's warm, friendly and welcoming. Perhaps she's genuinely a nice pony? Nah. It's got to be a test.

Based on an idea by Ambrose Bierce, from his excellent Devil's Dictionary. Just look up 'Insurance'.

Featured at 12.30 GMT on 15/06/2016. I am very pleased indeed about that.

This story is a sequel to Doctor Whooves and the Auton Invasion of Equestria

Doctor Whooves 1.2
Written as part of my Doctor Whooves series. Can be read on its own, at a pinch.
A story of love, and of friendship. A story of growing up, of growing old. Read it. Read it now. If that hasn't captured your interest, here's a message from the Doctor himself:

"Attention, readers! This is the Doctor speaking. I'm in a spot of bother. Having foiled an invasion attempt by the Autons, I was just trying to relax for the first time in about a century when someting else cropped up. It seems that another pony in this town has been going around for years pretending to be me. I am not best pleased at this. Who he is and why he's doing it I don't know... yet. It looks as though it's down to me to solve this little problem myself. Typical. And to think that the Timelords sent me here to keep me out of trouble. Chance would be a fine thing. All I know so far is that he's friends with the local mailmare, so all I have to do is track her down and talk to her. That should be no problem at all. Although oddly, some of the ponies in this town are remarkably difficult to talk to. Miss Sparkle seems to think it's my fault in some way. How she ever became a princess I'll never know."

Note: as before, this story takes place during the season 5 hiatus.
The Galgonquans, one of my favourite alien races, are taken from Aliens in the Family, a charming book my Margaret Mahy, later adapted into a TV series for the BBC. I have taken shameless liberties with the background of their species. I'm like that.

Doctor Whooves 1.1
Something is happening in the skies of Ponyville. Something that has been waiting a long time to return is about to make its move. This time, it's not just world domination it has in mind. There could be a chance of some revenge as well...
The Doctor is old. So old that he's begun to make mistakes, and, being who he is, these mistakes are usually not of the 'oh dear, where did I leave my keys?' sort, but more often of the 'press this button and the Cyberponies' spaceship will be eradicated... oh dear, I've destroyed the planet' sort. This sort of incompetance hasn't gone down very well with the High Council of Time Lords, who have exiled him to his favourite place: Equestria. Unfortunately, they've picked a time a few decades after the one he's used to.
Recovering, in the care of the kindly Fluttershy, from the regeneration through which the Time Lords forced him, the Doctor discovers that an old enemy has come back to haunt him. The Nestene Intelligence has returned to Equestria once more. He is determined, however, to defeat it by enlisting the help of the legendary Bearers of the Elements of Harmony. There are only two small but daunting problems with this proposal:
1. He can't walk in a straight line without falling over;
2. Everypony is convinced he's a lunatic, and is going to take a fair bit of unconvincing.
Meanwhile, Princess Luna, with the help of Professor Crater Mass, her scientific advisor, is making her own enquiries, but what are her true motives? As the death toll mounts, the Doctor begins to realise that he may be out of his depth.

Set during the season 5 hiatus, for some reason.
My first story, already a mess of elipses and clichés. For anyone who's interested, the Doctor involved is the 22nd, so your 'headcanon' should already be in tatters. Read this anyway. Read it and like it. You know you ought to. I'll try and make it fit with MLP's canon, anyway. I thought that since the Autons have already been used to introduce two great Doctors, why not make it three?
This is not a 'Doctor travels into the Ponyverse' type crossover, more just a 'The Doctor, who is already there, bumbles into our favourite characters for the first time' sort of thing. It's loosely based on the TV story 'Spearhead from Space', but it's not a retelling. I did say 'loosely'. The title will only seem anything other than ridiculous if you're familiar with the Target novelisations, which I'd imagine roughly none of you are. Ah, well...
Rated teen for violence, but nothing gory. Nothing you wouldn't see in Doctor Who, in fact. If you've read this far, you probably ought to read the story.
For listening, some saint has uploaded a Spearhead from Space suite, which I heartily recommend to any Doc 'True nuts out there: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dx7-oCOOX_I