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- The CMC and friends are on the hunt for candy one Nightmare Night, but get a lot more than they bargained for.Featherflutter · 2.6k words · 13 0 · 509 views
- After the trip to Vanhoover, Pipsqueak wants to come out to his parents with Featherweight, but Featherweight is having concernsFeatherflutter · 12k words · 18 3 · 552 views
- While getting ready for a major concert, Octave realizes that Noteworthy has caught hay fever. It is up to him to get him better.Featherflutter · 7k words · 490 views
- A struggling Time Turner works to push himself past his lost love for DitzyFeatherflutter · 3.2k words · 504 views
- After being given the news of being able to go on the student council trip to Vanhoover, Featherweight and Pipsqueak plan and scheme on ways to make this the best trip ever. Though something seems off with Featherweight.Featherflutter · 17k words · 16 3 · 421 views
- Featherweight and Pip have a pleasant lunch at Sugar Cube CornerFeatherflutter · 1.9k words · 532 views
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2584148
Thank you! Really, I wish I got more criticism like that. Seriously. I would totally agree with everything you said. This was a real early work of mine and I hope to fix some of this stuff in Bonding Experience.
Really, thanks! And I hope you enjoy the sequel if you want to read it.
-Milo
2583874
I enjoyed the fic. The dialogue between the two main characters was metered well, being boisterous when applicable and timid when needed. There were times when I was a bit confused on how much time had passed, but it was minor confusion. There were some noticeable errors, grammatical and otherwise, but other than that I enjoyed it. For some reason though, I couldn't place the body of Retto with the dialogue and personality of him. What he looks like doesn't show up to me when I try to imagine him from text alone. I think that is just me, though. Overall, I really enjoyed the adventure. It was a nice day read.
Hey! Thanks for the fave, it really means a lot and if you have any comments I would love to hear them!!
-Milo
I saw the story you edited here. I have only one very important question for you-Do you edit for anyone and if so, how good are you?