Her Forest

by AliziaRoElier

Applegate

“No fucking way. No. FUCKING. Way.” Day said deadpan. He was staring at a wooden ring. It was made of some kind of organic substance, but it wasn’t any kind he could recognize. It was bright red, the color of a fire engine, and it had no grain. He would not have been able to identify it had he not been specifically told what it was by the Apple family’s eldest and most genius son.

That was another thing that was bothering him. Day could not believe anything that had happened in the last hours of daylight of his sixth day in this world.

When they’d arrived at the farm he hadn’t expected much more than the hasty descriptions the ponies he followed gave him. It was an apple orchard, the Apple family ran it, they sold apple products to half of Equestria. It seemed fairly normal, all things considered. So after an explanation by Luna and Twilight about what was going on, what had happened in the last two days, and their offer to Applejack and her sister Applebloom of a spot in their group he expected a fairly quiet evening getting ready for the adventure.

What he’d actually received was a crash course in trans-dimensional warp fields and and nth planar temporal displacement. His new friends had forgotten to inform him that the Apple family’s eldest son was a mathematical and scientific prodigy. Who’d built a portal. With Pinkie’s help.

And he wanted to come along.

The red stallion remained silent at his side and chewed his stalk of hay thoughtfully. On his other side, Spike nonchalantly chewed on an emerald. Day wasn’t exactly sure where he’d gotten it but he wasn’t about to ask.

“So... you built a Stargate. Out of wood. And you need me to move it into the forest so we can gather enough power to turn it on.” Day said flatly. “Are you insane?”

“Eenope.”

“Great.”

~^~

“So that’s what Luna’s attempting, Applejack. We’d really like it if you could come along. We know it’s just the start of the growing season, but with time travel, that won’t really matter anyway...” Twilight finished.

Applejack rubbed her chin thoughtfully with a hoof. She looked at her family in the room. Granny Smith was sleeping soundly in her rocker - no help from her in decision making. Applebloom was giving her puppy dog eyes.

“No offense, Princess, but is bringing along three fillies an’ a baby dragon really a good idea?” Applejack questioned. She didn’t want to bring her little sister along. Unfortunately, she could tell without even looking that she wouldn’t have Big Mac’s agreement for this adventure.

“We...” Luna paused. Pinkie was incessantly poking the base of her wings, “Yes, Pinkie Pie?”

“The fillies need to come with us! Applebloom has a highway to find, Sweetie Belle needs to meet some aliens, and Scootaloo... is a ninja... You wouldn’t stop three fillies from meeting their destiny would you?!”

Pinkie Pie finished with a flourish and gathered the three fillies in question to make a quadruply-strong puppy dog face.

Day couldn’t help but note that it was a bit more threatening and disturbing than it was cute.

Luna seemed to be at a loss, “No?”

Applejack shook her head and sighed, “Does nopony see how this is a bad idea?”

The rest of the group shuffled their hoofs, claws, or feet and refused to make eye contact with anyone else. Day could see the cogs in her head making connections.

“Fine... fine... me an’ Applebloom with with y’all. Somepony’s got ta keep you all level-like.”

“Ah’m coming too...” The deep bass voice from the side startled the group, well, the group minus Luna. The red stallion leaned forward and looked everyone in the eye. “Y’all are going to be traveling through time and space and that’s always been ma dream. Now, I won’t claim to understand everything that’s goin’ on but if ya need a way to move through time, I got it.”

Luna didn’t look at all surprised to hear that a farmpony had access to a time machine. Day narrowed his eyes and resolved to ask her later if this had been originally part of her plan.

“Uh... right... just how exactly did you come across this time machine?” Day asked carefully.

“Ah built it a’course.” The stallion replied.

Applejack was shaking her head, “Big Mac... your fancy mathematics can’t help us here. This is pure magical stuff.”

Day snorted. If this stallion really had built a time machine, it wasn’t merely “fancy” it was miraculous.

“Alright, let’s hear it then. How’d you build it, Mr. Big Mac.”

“Well, it’s like this...”

~^~

After an hour of non-stop scientific and mathematical jargon, Day couldn’t take it anymore.

“Alright, alright. Good enough for me. Luna? Are we using his gate... time machine... thing or not?” He looked at the demi-goddess desperately.

“Yes.”

And so, he found himself before a fusion of mathematics, science, magic, and Pinkie’s insanity. He wondered just how exactly he was supposed to cope with everything.

The ring looked exactly like the kind he’d seen in Stargate. It had a ring of symbols around the edges and chevrons that ran on a track around the sides. He could recognize the red symbols as letters and numbers of the Equestria written language, but beyond that, he couldn’t really understand what it said. The ring was attached to a dais with a ramp that led to its top. The entire assembly was on a rolling platform.

“So... we’re moving this? Tonight?”

“Eeyup.” Big Mac moved his stalk to the other side of his mouth.

“Day... I have to say this before we go on this crazy adventure. You are honestly the weirdest thing Ponyville’s ever seen. I don’t think Discord managed to make this much chaos and randomness.”

“I...” Day didn’t really know how to respond to that, “Is that supposed to be an insult?”

“Nah, I just figured you should know.” Spike tossed the rest of his gem into his mouth.

“Right... let’s just get this to the forest edge... it should be far enough into the forest that it will be powered up tomorrow morning.”

---

“Congratulations! Applejack has joined your party! All members gain a +20% resistance to stupidity! (Protip: You started out with two points in this skill.)

“Congratulations! Applebloom has joined your party! Access to the Machine unlocked!”

“Congratulations! Big Macintosh has joined your party! All robotic and cybernetic party members gain Repair aura!”

Author's Note:

And yes, there are/will be robots in the group.

Shit's about to get weird, mares and gentlecolts.

Comments

[tia brony]

denver.mylittlefacewhen.com/media/f/img/mlfw299_1298776425927.jpg
do i need to say anything more?

[AliziaRoElier]

2320520

Ha. Yeah, that's pretty much what I'm going for.

[TheTownCrier]

You just broke my brain.

[AliziaRoElier]

2321797

As opposed to the 16.5 times I have before?

[justsomerandompony]

Well then we shall see where this goes

[AliziaRoElier]

2573792

I would like to refer you to the Comedy Tag. Also, the Random tag.

The point of this story is to be silly and random and over the top. If I wanted to write a more serious story, I wouldn't have put it in this category now would I.

[DisgruntledBrony]

2290432 Look at me, replying to this ancient post!
Two things. One, I don't see how Twilight knowing about Celestia's suicide will ruin Luna's plan. Did I miss something? Or was that planned for a later chapter?

Which brings me to topic numero dos: Is this fic dead? Or are you planning on continuing it?

[AliziaRoElier]

2734293

For now, I'm moving it to Hiatus. Freaking Drexel sucks up my time like a sponge. Until I go back out on co-op my writing time is, like, zero.