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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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I'm that first downvote
Didn't like the story- deal with it
2117279 It's fine, I can't please ever-pony.
Yea that's true
it's okay, you earned a fave and a like
Not bad I have read a few stories like this but I will see how this turns out.
looks pretty good for a first time
Ok, human just appeared aaaaaaaaaand AJ's a bitch
I would like to point out that anthro isn't really considered humanized. Whatever the case, I'm not really a fan of anthro but I'm willing to give this a chance.
But for that to come to pass; a question:
I noticed the "Romance" and "Sex" tags. My point: will this be the typical HiE where everything go ridiculously easy for the protagonist and he makes the mane six fall in love with him in an instant - and/or worse, all of them? Because if that's the case I'm out.
Anyway, without further ado; let's read. Be right back with a review.
I like the fact that Spike was the one to knock out the protagonist. In 99% cases it's always Applejack or Rainbow Dash, which is becoming a bore.
Isaac seems like a likable guy and a good enough character, though the fact that he takes the whole "being ripped from my own world to a land of colourful, talking equine creatures" really well bugs me. Mental break-downs, people - you would have had one had it happened to you.
Well, things seem to go pretty easy for him if you overlook the fact that he got locked in a cage like some animal. Other than that I don't really see anything that may turn out to be a problem in the fut- wait; the mane six don't trust him? And Applejack's and Dash's attitude (and some for Twilight) makes me want to hate them in this story?
...
I love it! This contradicts my previous statement that things will go easy for Issac, which is a good thing! Make him work for his well-being, make him deserve their trust!
So far, so good.
Just one thing:
media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lw9nfgfg4z1qjokxe.gif
Capitalize 'belong' in the title.
I WANNA HEAL I WANNA FEEL WHAT I THOUGHT WAS NEVER REAL I WANNA LET GO ON THE PAIN I FEL TO LONG! erase all the pain it has come I WANNA HEAL I WANNA FEEL LIKE IM CLOSE TO SOMETHING REAL I WANNA LET GO GO TGE PAIN I FELT SO LONG!
SOMEWHERE I BELONG
This seems rather standard. I'll wait to pass judgement after something actually happens.
2117744 Oh trust me a break down is coming it will appear later on.
2118155 haha
I think I may have picked up on another mistake earlier, but I'm not absolutely sure.
Out with the bad, on with the good as it were, I can't say I dislike it.
It's sort of interesting to think of the ponies as anthro, especially since the cover art has me seeing them as human.
Well, I'll follow it with a favorite and a like, please,do write on, I suppose I would like to see more.
Good day gentlemen.
2118317 I just chose the pic because it looked cool and I'll fix the spelling error. Thanks for pointing it out.
2118326
Welcome.
Here to help, I'll be a little off-side proof reader.
2118313 And the relationship(s) between the protagonist and the pony of romantic interest? Will it be built or just "Hey, I like you - let's have sex!"?
im like it :D
Ok the story is going steady, lets see how it turns out.
Not bad, I will see how this will go
"Steve looked ahead"
"Steve hopped down into a white 20 x 20 room."
Thought I should point those out.
you seriously need to proofread stuff before you post it. there are typos all over this hunk of dog shit.
2117744
meh Ive read better soup cans so 4 out of 5 celistias
Okay, hold on...he just "accidentally" walked into a den of wolves? Then just "happened" to get teleported right before impending death? Call me cynical, but that seems just a bit too convenient.
2122729 Would you rather he just MAGICALLY FALL OUT OF THE SKY into Equestria? Or die and wake up in Equestria? I find it a bit more original than others could come up with.
Isaac is best James Bond.
HiEs are a bit overdone, but good job nonetheless
I have a few questions:
What does the human have anything to do with discord!?
What kind of a sick hospital doesn't have widows!?
Why were the mane six playing spin the bottle/ truth or dare!?
How did issac check to see if the door is locked and still have the I.V. in his wrist!?
What is with you and the number 80!?
Why is applejack such a bitch!?
What did issac eat in the mess hall!? Hay!?
Why is issac's sweater so eye catching when rainbow dash is wearing a similar design!?
And most importantly...
Where is the clop !?
Down vote dude... You did nothing but confuse and bore me.
I'm gonna keep reading though cause I'm cool like that and I just can't resist anamorphic clop.
You misspelled "knob" and "acquainted."
Always with the wolves getting the bad press. There are barely any documented wolf attacks to begin with and the only ones there are were done by desperate loners who saw an oppurtunity in a passing human that was blatantly displaying injury or sickness. Coyotes are where the finger should be pointing at!
this isnt so bad so far, one or two mistakes and a little sprucing up and this can turn out for the better, shame about all those dislikes, its like HIE stories are the bane of this site or something? anywho this is good all the sames
Hmm, despite some typos, this seems like a stable read. Now I am curious myself as to how much the clop extends, and how's life gonna be for our engineer() here. I will hold my vote until I read a few more chapters, but things are leaning towards a fav.
I would just like to point out that while he seems absolutely baffled that they think they are unicorns or pegasi (mythical creatures that do not exist) he doesn't even acknowledge the fact that they call themselves ponies (large quadrupedal beasts that most people are at least vaguely familiar with.)
Also, you can't pick a lock with a needle (or at least with a single unbent needle. Maybe with several, bent specifically for the task, and something flat and stiff to turn the lock you could)
You can't crawl through air vents. They are typically tiny, have lots of sharp edges and screws inside, and can't support any weight.
Oh, and you can't walk around in a hospital room without removing the heart monitor, which would cause it to flat-line.
All in all, this felt very rushed.
Alright, why did Rainbow and Applejack randomly assault him? Seriously, they aren't that violent.
“Oh so they’re like a P-pod and P-phone.” Twilight said. He started to chuckle at the statement.
I'm going to do the expression
*pulls out a loaded gun and points it to his foot and fires*
That line makes me want to do this
PRESSURE POINT!!!
2393080 TOTALLY
ctrl f to find dem errors
"dark purplr blouse with a brown skirt the twent to her knees." I do this a lot too :P
(ctrl + f to find if you didn't know)
I written not amazing but not average. His initial reaction of "oh this must be punk'd or something" was kinda stereotypical though.
oh and imagining all this as anthro is new, in a good way :P
Not bad for your first HiE. I dont know why the hate for picking wolves as a menace. Humans are a definite threat to wolves and one popping up in their den area is a clear threat to the cubs so they will go ballistic for that. Although if you leave the den out altogether, I would recommend Coydogs. I've been attacked by those before *shudder* All the aloof feralness of a coyote, and the muscle, size, and lack of fear dogs have...
If you write more anthrofics with humans, I hope for more descriptions on how the ponies differ from humans. Say their large, expressive eyes... pert, elegant muzzles about 4 inches or so, or 6-8 for Celestia and Luna, ears that follow him as he moves around them... Are their legs human-like? do they have legs more like their full-pony FiM counterparts? You get the point.
who is disliking this story is a hater this is the best HIE and anthro fic i ever read
this reminds me of The scent: lust of mares this and that are both amazing fics
The beginning appears to me as something Meghan Mccarthy would come up with... if it was a slow day for her
But seriously, if it branches out into something interesting, the story might just be worth reading.
PS: Personally I came here to read this for the sake of anthro pony boobies! LOL
2685408
I disliked this.
This is one of the worst stories I have ever read.
Why?
With improper grammar, and spelling for one. EVERYONE is out of character. The pacing sucks, the dialogue sucks. The main character seems like a colossal imbecile who has no rhyme or reason to what he does.
Do you know what a knife would do to a bunch of wolves and bears?
Nothing.
It would do absolutely nothing because he would be mauled to death.
And I could list every individual little thing about this piece of writing that is horrible, but I don't have two hours right now.
Also, I wouldn't be so critical if this didn't have the loads of views it has that could have been better spent somewhere else.
Where did the cage come from?
3311717
Well, having a knife is better than having nothing, and I don't think a 21 year old would be able to afford a gun and ammunition. And sure, the grammar and pacing isn't the best, but it's a shit ton better than what some people can do. By the way, everyone can't be out of character. An example of this is the main character. How can someone completely made up be out of character in the first chapter. I can understand the fifth, because the character had time to develop, but not the first. Besides, they seem in character to me.
You, know, I don't think I have ever seen James Bond pick a lock, he usually blows the lock up or shoots it.
And on a tangentially related subject, I believe that James Bond is really a timelord (it fit's doesn't it)
*sigh* im sorry but this happens way to often. Your not going about this in the right way. You don't just pop up, go to the royal hospital, eat dinner with the princess and blam everything's fine. Dat ain't how it works. I know it gets better later but still. Come on bro.