Oh shit oh shit oh shit oh shiiiiiiiiiii-
“Get in the closet. Get. Get. Get. Go. Closet!” You practically order.
“What? Why? Hey! Quit pushing me!” Dash fires back.
“Just get in the closet.”
“Fine! Just stop pushing me.”
You watch, and try not to snicker, as she stumbles back into the closet. You close the door most of the way, leaving it slightly open. Just in time, too, as the voice calls again as it comes up the stairs.
“Bro! Get up!” It yells.
“I’m up! I’m up! Jesus, quit yelling!” You respond as the source comes into your room.
“You’re up? Pfft. This early? No way man. And why are you so stiff? Relax. I’ve walked in on you doing worse things dude.”
“SHUT UP!”
“No.”
“Dammit. Why are you so annoying?”
“Because it’s my job?”
Have I ever told you that I like your brother?
Fuck off, brain.
We could rule the world.
Fuck. Off. Brain.
Oh fine. Spoil my fun, why don’t you.
“What are you hiding bro?”
Your face flushes. “W-what?”
“You’re hiding something. You’re NEVER up and dressed this early. EVER.”
“I’m not hiding anything. Heh.” You smile awkwardly.
You hear a shuffle come from your closet, and glance over. At least your brother didn’t hear anything.
“Ha. Right. And I’m a fuckin’ fairy,” he quips, sarcastic.
“Oh? You finally admit it?” You smirk.
“Shut up.”
He looks over to your closet and asks, raising an eyebrow, “So, whatcha hidin’?”
“Nothing man. Now what’ll it take for you to leave?”
You look around the room, trying to find something to make him get lost. He already knows you’re hiding something, and he never gives up on finding shit out. You notice your Xbox, and instantly shut that idea down. That is the last thing you would give to him. Unfortunately, he follows your eyes around the room.
“I’ll leave if you give me your 360.” He smirks.
“Oh no. No no no no no. You’re not getting that.” You respond.
“Alright, I guess I’ll just start searching your room.”
You sigh, “One week. You can have it for one week. Now go.”
He smiles a bit, and nods. As you go to pull all the wires and some games together, you hear louder rustling in the closet. You both look over and then back at each other. With a thud, Rainbow falls forward out of the closet.
“Ow.” She grunts.
Your brother’s mouth falls open, and slowly turns into a shit eating grin. He turns to you, smirking.
“So... you were hiding something.”
“Damn. Fine, what’ll it take now?” You respond.
“Your Xbox for the rest of the month, and fifteen minutes with her.” He smirks once more.
“Don’t make me put my fist through your kidney.” You hiss, glaring.
“Alright, alright. Gimme your Xbox for a month, and your car for the next two weeks.”
“MY CAR?! ARE YOU INSANE?!”
“Alright...I guess I’ll just tell mom you snuck in some chick for a quickie.”
“And I should worry why? I’m an adult.”
“But it’s not your house, and she’ll still kill you.”
“Touche."
"So... gimme the keys."
"No."
"Suit yourself. Hey mom!"
You put your younger brother in a headlock, and cover his mouth. You sit him down, and keep his mouth covered.
"Don't tell mom. You’ve got it all wrong. We didn’t do anything.” You say, taking away your hand.
"Then why is she half naked and in your shirt? Riddle me that, Batman." He responds.
"If I could trust you to keep a secret, I'd tell you."
"I'm trustworthy!" He argues.
"Sure. And what happened with your girlfriend?"
"How'd you know about that?"
"I have my sources."
Now he looks scared. It looks to you like he's been keeping that secret somehow. Odd, considering that you wouldn't trust him half as far as you could throw him with a secret that big. You smirk as the tables take a sudden turn in your favor. You release your hold on his neck, and notice that Rainbow has been intently watching the back and forth with your brother.
“H-how much more do you know?” He asks.
“Lots.” You say, a devious smile growing on your face.
"You wouldn't say anything, right?" He asks, shaking a bit.
"You won't tell mom?"
"No! I Promise."
"Then I'll stay quiet."
You look over to the girl on her knees. She’s staring at both of you. She has an absolutely adorable look on her face which also clearly expresses confusion.
D'aaaaawwwww
Did you really just do that?
Yes I did, brain.
I really hate you right now.
Awwww, I love you too my grey matter friend!
Fuck you. Human.
Rainbow blinks, “Um, hi again.”
“Dude...why’d she dye her hair like that?” Your brother asks.
“Huh? I didn’t dye my mane!”
“Mane? What are you, a horse?” Your bro turns to you, “You have weird taste in chicks.”
“And you’re a virgin. Now shut up, and get the hell out.” With that, you get up and push him out the door.
"Hey! I'm not a-." You slam the door in his face, and laugh a bit.
You turn and face Rainbow, who still has an adorable look of confusion on her face.
"Who was that?" She wonders.
"The devil. Also known as my little brother." You reply.
She blinks, “Was that supposed to be funny?”
BURN!
Shut up, Kelso.
You sigh, “A little bit, but it’s true either way. Sorry you had to see that.”
She laughs now. She probably found that quarrel funny. “What did he mean by fifteen minutes with me?”
When the question comes, your face flushes. “Nevermind that. You don’t wanna know.”
He'd only need ten seconds anyway. Heuhuehehe.
Don't insult my future apprentice, human.
Both of you cringe as you hear a deafening shriek from below you. Then some very fast and harsh footsteps coming up the stairs. The door practically flies off its hinges as your mother barges into your room. She looks directly at you, and her expression is one of anger. The fires of Hell itself are in that glare. Her head turns, and she gasps at the sight of Rainbow in nothing but your shirt. You’re staring at her face, and she mouths “what the fuuu.” That asshole behind her has his grin back, and mom’s exchanging glances with both of you again.
"You little shit." You growl, stepping towards your brother.
"Hold it right there." Your mother orders. “What is the meaning of this? Who is she?”
You sigh, “It’s not what you think, and it’s entirely out of context.”
You'd better have a clever story. I'm not going to the loony bin because of you, human.
I'm thinking I need to be there anyway. My brain has a mind of its own!
Quiet, human.
“Then what is it?” she yells.
“I honestly don’t know either. She’s just a friend here...”
"A friend with benefits. Am I right?" Your sibling smirks.
"Shut up Mark." You and your mom say in unison.
"Who is she and what is she doing here? I want an answer, now!" Your furious mother exclaims.
“A friend. And I don’t know!”
“What do you mean you ‘don’t know’?”
“Stop!” Rainbow screams. “Please, just stop.” The two of you blink, and look at Rainbow. She looks fed up, and stares straight at you.
“I’m not from here. I’m not a human."
You look at your mother. She blinks, and looks confused. She turns to you with an expression that says, "Which asylum did she escape from?"
"If you can't explain what's going on, I'm calling the police." Your mom says.
"I can explain. It's just a really long story." You reply.
“All ears.”
“She’s a pony. From another dimension."
"A pony?"
"Yes. A pegasus named Rainbow Dash."
“A pegasus?”
"Yes. A pegasus."
And so, the next hour consists of reliving the events of the last two months in Equestria. You tell them just about everything. Becoming a pony. Learning to fly. The few adventures you had gone on, and the mishaps you had gotten into with Rainbow.
“Two months? But you were at dinner last night."
"I know. I don't get it either. I guess there's some crazy time thing between here and there."
“You’re just insane. That couldn’t have happened. Dress her up and send her home.”
"I'm serious, mom. If we had done anything, why would I make up a lie that elaborate? Plus, do you even see any women's clothing?”
"I... well... no. But you could be hiding it! Besides, I don't see any evidence of how you could have gotten back from this 'Other dimension'."
"Skittles, is that portal still open?" You ask Rainbow.
"It was a few minutes ago. You can check."
You look at your mom once more, "You want proof? I'll show you proof."
You step over to the closet door, and throw it open. As hoped, the flowing and spiraling orange oval is still there.
Mark and your mother gasp.
"How's that for proof?"
They just stand there, stunned. Both your mother and brother mouth, “the fuuu...” You shut your closet door and their attention turns to Dash, and then you.
Shrugging, you say, “Welp. Told you. I have no explanation.”
"But how'd she get here?" Your mom asks.
"I, uh, fell through! Yeah, that's it. Fell through."
Your mother crosses her arms, and gets a sort of cocky look on her face as she looks straight at Dash. It's a look that says "You're lying and I know you're lying."
“N-no no no. I really fell through it.”
"Suuuuure. But...since I really have no choice but to believe my son, I'll try to help you fit in."
You blink, surprised at how quickly your mother... accepted the fact. You honestly expected her to question it more. But then again the evidence is pretty solid. There is a portal in the closet after all. Before you can say anything, your mother and Dash are gone.
"I think I'll go...help them." Your brother says.
"Shut up Mark."
Hilarious
that was so awesome my brain could not comprehend it
more please
Ok one what rainhoe songs comment was adorable two that was bucking hilarious and thee awsome job
For some reason I was uninformed that this story had updated despite adding it to favorites.
God damnit now I'm paranoid.
Wait typo. Rainbow song wooops
2340870 it updated about 15 minutes ago.
i.imgur.com/HgOezIB.jpg
NOOOOOOOOOOO WHY DID THE CHAPTER HAVE TO END!?
IT WAS GETTING SUPER DUPER AMAZING AND THEN IT JUST STOPS.
sighs* I guess i have to wait for an update
PLEASE continue writing
/)*(\
2341602
Did I ever say I would give up? No, dammit! Writing is my only talent.
Or is it just my special talent?
I dunno. All I know is that if I were a pony, my CM would be a quill or some shit.
Butt cereal, the next chapter will come. Don't panic. Panic is bad.
2341714
Takes a deep breath*
ok, I have waited this long... I guess I could wait until the next chapter is released. :D
Keep up the great writing, I REALLY like the story so far.
/)*(\
2341733
Good.
weknowmemes.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/kelso-burn.jpg
At first i was like: i.chzbgr.com/maxW500/1586482432/h0AA56135/
And then i was like: weknowmemes.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/kelso-burn.jpg
2345606
All those pictures. Holy shit.
But then Kelso appeared. Thank you for Kelso.
You know I do absolutely nothing on Sundays.
So portals. Endless fun for all. Except interdimensional monsters. From space. They like to eat worlds and such.
Boop.
Uhm... if the portal was still open why didn't Rainbow Dash step inside there and then?
2348746
Then there wouldn't be a story, would there?
2348766 I guess. And, like stated in the second(?) chapter, Rainbow Dash is the adventurous type. I bet if the protagonist's brain heard that he would probably make a witty joke, something all pointless inner conflicts always does in fics. I'm a coconut though, so I groan at everything but my inner, soft side laughs at it because he likes everything.
If this were really me, and I really had a brother like that...
*a bit of searching later...*
...I can't even find a suitable image for that shit.
Seriously, I already hate that fucker.
Keep going with this, man.
The 'enter' key is my friend.
Anyway:
i.imgur.com/BuzT6zz.gif
All of my yes.
Enter.
Enter.
Enter.
Enter.
ohgodwhy.jpg
Chapter was quite a bit weaker than the others, honestly. This "Mark" character seems like a tool and Rainbow just blurting out everything is beyond ridiculous. Even she would know how to keep her tongue on something like that.
2355182 Yeah, it was weak. But in my defense, my co author is addicted to League of Legends and wasn't much help.
Oh, and we were shooting for "absolute tool" with Mark. Looks like we...hit the mark! *rim shot*
...
Please don't hate me for that joke.
I think this message sums up everyone's response.
Next chapter plz .
Very good.
More please.
Give me more... NOW!
Send your co-writer to rehab and get back to writing! I WANT MORE BRAIN, DAGNABBIT
And By the way, maybe a prequel is a good idea for a story?
2383266 maybe.
2383266 maybe
2385604 (not actually insulting you)
British swera: shut up ya drunken wanker! I'll come over there and shove that invinsable blade so far up your ass, you'd vomit out a tin can!
American swear: Fuck off dickhead!
Please continue.
2385625 No, no, you're giving the American too much credit. Trust me, I live with quite a few Americans. They'll mostly just say "Fuck off!" or use a racially derogatory slur. Me? I'd rather soil my cummerbund with year-old dairy products than say such terrible words.
2355182 Ok...
"Yeah, it was weak. But in my defense, my co author is addicted to League of Legends and wasn't much help."
KIND OF. A LITTLE BIT.
Either way it shouldn't matter because we both like how Mark turned out. Pfft hahaha he's supposed to be the idiotic asshole that doesn't understand his surroundings.
Idea- maybe he can befriend Trixie?
2383263 Rehab?
Why?
You no leik meh?
Me no good enough?
[REDACTED]--- USER BANISHED TO MOON.
2383266 That MAY happen. Eventually.
Will happen? Someday.
Uncertainty sucks. Don't it?
2385604 Dude. You've got no idea how fun it is in Russian.
Not only does it sound ridiculous, but it is.
Infinite laughter cycle.
WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
Also- ass + silk = yes.
2395233 That's why it's better in a different... accent?
Meh... Try a different language. That's where the fun starts.
2402736 Oh, totally. Ever swear someone out in Korean? If you do it right, you sound as if you're wishing them well.
2402826
I think that's the only good thing about learning new languages.
The cussing.
2402847 Seriously. Our Spanish teacher taught us how to say "go fuck yourself" in Spanish. I don't remember how to write it, though... Here's one I do remember:
ir al infierno! Go to Hell!
2402987 Ha. What a teacher.
Lucky you.
2402995 Eh, he knew we'd look it up anyways, so he was just saving us the trouble.
>> Creesic I just wanted more chapters, plz don't hate me!
>> Creesic I just wanted more chapters, plz don't hate me!
Don't really like the inner monologue
2404703 Hate you? Pfft. Why would I hate you?
>>Creesic Cause i said they must send you to rehab!
2415092 That's alright. Sorry to say that we're not going to get rid of it. It's funny to us.
2416212 Pah. I'm too good for that.
Not really.
They kicked me out.