Quizzical Greystone And The Basements Of Doom
Chapter 1 Into The Deep, Dark Forest
“Alright, children, let’s see if I can find the handsome fella who lives here.”
The foals watched the khaki colored pegasus wade up to his barrel into the small pond. He seemed utterly indifferent to the water and the mud, and he continued a cheerful monologue as got deeper and deeper into the pond.
The foals crowded along the bank, as near the water as they dared (it had been made very clear that there was at least one crocodile here). None of them took their eyes off the stallion for a second.
They all watched him closely, not because he was obviously mad and needed to be kept under observation, but because he was Shady Stalker, the most famous naturalist in Equestria.
“Ah, here we go,” cried Dr. Stalker, suddenly standing up on his hind legs. In his fore legs he held a crocodile pinned against his barrel. Including its tail it was as long as he was. “Behold, children, the rare Everfree crocodile. Isn’t he a beauty? Let me bring him out where you all can have a better look at this little guy.”
He sloshed back to shore, the reptile in his grasp putting up surprising little fight. Once back on land, Shady set the crocodile down in the middle of clear spot, holding it only by the tip of its tail. The crocodile twisted and made one experimental snap at its captor. When Shady easily danced out of the way the crocodile seemed to give up; though as it lay still it gaped and groaned, as if to indicate that while it would put up with this for the moment it was not happy. “Form a circle, children. No closer than his length, or he can reach you. And please, none of you smile. For most crocs it’s an old mare’s tale, but never smile at an Everfree crocodile. They really don’t like it. No one knows why. Now, can any of you tell me what’s special about this animal?”
“Oooh, is it because he’s not the scariest thing in the forest?” answered Snips, without waiting to be called on. “There’s monsters out here that can eat him whole!”
“Well, yes, but that wasn’t what I was looking for. It’s true the Everfree is probably the only place where a crocodile isn’t the apex predator. But once he reaches his full length at about four to six pony lengths most of the Forest’s denizens are likely to leave him alone. But we’ll get back to that. How about you, Dear?” Shady pointed to a small grey unicorn filly. “What do you think makes the Everfree croc unique?”
“Um, well, um,” began Quizzical Greystone. “Is it that they are cold weather adapted, Dr. Stalker?”
At the beginning of their field trip that morning Quiz had brought Shady her copies of three of his books and shyly asked him to sign them (Quiz actually owned all 16 of his books, but most of them were in the family library back home in Canterlot). Ever since then, Quiz had become Shady’s ‘go to girl’ when he wanted to call on somepony. He thought that, since she was a fan, he was doing her a favor.
It was almost too much for Quiz. She had made a great deal of progress since moving to Ponyville; her social anxiety was no longer crippling, most of the time. But it had taken all her courage just to ask for an autograph. The constant attention from the celebrity scientist taxed the very limits of Quiz’s resolve not to slip away and hide.
“Spot on, young Miss. But did I not ask you all to please call me Shady?”
“Yes, you did, Dr. Stalker.”
“Well, then?”
“Er… well, then what, Dr. Stalker?”
“Never mind. Anyway, the Everfree croc is the only crocodilian that doesn’t live at or near the tropics. This little guy will burrow down into the mud and sleep through the winter freeze. Step back, children, I’m going to let him get back to the hard work of stuffing himself to prepare for the winter.” Sandy pointed the crocodile’s snout towards the water and let go of his tail. The croc needed no prompting, and dashed back into his pond.
“Oh, oh!” called Snails. “Are there fresh water squid in this pond? Will we get to see them fight?”
Shady sighed. “No, Sonny, we aren’t going to see a fight. Can anypony tell us…where’d she go?” Since he couldn’t see Quiz, who was hiding behind Snails, he answered his own question. “This pond is much too shallow for fresh water squid. Also, we aren’t here to see animals fight. You should remember that not all of nature is red of tooth and claw, even in the Everfree Forest. We need to move on, but I can show you what I mean as we walk.”
#
Despite Shady making her uncomfortable, Quiz was enjoying the field trip. She always enjoyed school field trips, and some ponies would say that the duller they were the better Quiz liked them. None of Quiz’s friends would ever say such a thing, but even they might think it.
Quiz liked how the Forest’s terrain rolled and rambled, and there were many rock outcrops rising among the trees. Geology was Quiz’s favorite science, and she found it pleasing to see how the sedimentary layers differed from those in nearby Ponyville. As she walked Quiz had her notebook hovering just ahead of her nose, her quill darting across the pages. Quiz rarely forgot anything, but she still compulsively wrote everything down.
Quiz was very good at multi-tasking; but taking in the scenery, and attending to Shady’s every word, and examining the layers of strata in every outcrop, and keeping up her notes, and watching where she was going spread her attention a bit too far. Something had to suffer, and the lapse came in the thing that held Quiz’s attention the least.
Quiz wasn’t watching where she was going and walked head first into a tree.
#
“Quiz, are you Ok?” Since Sweetie Belle first met Quiz not a single day had gone by without her at least once looking down at her friend, who was for some reason lying on the ground, and asking that question. Frustratingly, Quiz always answered the same way.
“I will be fine,” said Quiz. She squinted at the forest of pony legs now surrounding her. “However, I seem to be having trouble with my vision… oh. Could somepony help me find my glasses?”
Apple Bloom moved to stand next to Quiz and asked, “Can you manage on your own or do you need help up, Quiz?” Of Quiz’s friends Apple Bloom took the most pragmatic view Quiz’s aptitude for accident. ‘She hasn’t killed herself yet, so she probably never will,’ Apple Bloom was fond of saying.
“I can manage,” answered Quiz. “It was a very slow collision.”
Once Quiz was standing Sweetie Belle stepped up to her and began brushing dead leaves from Quiz’s coat. “I really wish you’d stop doing stuff like that this!” she whined. Sweetie Belle did not take a pragmatic view of Quiz’s many accidents. Each minor mishap triggered a flashback to much scarier close calls.
One of the two class chaperones came and took charge at this point. “Please hold still, Quiz, and let me look you over,” said Fluttershy. Quiz suffered her tender ministrations stoically. “You’re going to have a tender spot and it’s going to raise a welt, but it shouldn’t hurt too very much if you just don’t touch it.” Fluttershy fished a jar of salve out of her saddle bag and gently placed a small dollop on Quiz’s forehead. “There. How does that feel, Quiz?”
“That feels quite nice, thank you Miss Fluttershy.”
Pipsqueak ran up to them, waving Quiz’s notebook. “I found this in the bushes, Miss Quizzical. It flew a long way! But I didn’t see your quill anywhere.”
“Thank you very much, Pip,” said Quiz, reaching for the notebook. “And I have several spare quills…”
Fluttershy reached out to stop her from taking the notebook. “Now, Quiz, I know Twilight has spoken to you about this. What did she tell you?”
“’Do not take notes while crossing streets,’” recited Quiz. “That is not what I was doing, Miss Fluttershy.”
“Don’t be picky, Quiz,” said Fluttershy, gently. “I think the same lesson applies here.” She frowned at Quiz. It was a frown that could break your heart. “Am I going to have to take it away from you?”
“No, Miss Fluttershy.” Quiz took the notebook and slipped it away in her saddle bag.
Satisfied that Quiz could probably get through the rest of the trip unharmed, Fluttershy trotted off and began to have a quiet word with Cheerilee.
“Here, Miss, I found these for you,” said a young colt, holding Quiz’s glasses.
Shadow Seeker was Shady’s number one assistant, and his son. Shadow was a couple of years older than the foals in Cheerilee’s class. He was very handsome, with a charcoal coat and a dark red mane and tail. He had not said very much, leaving all the talking to his father, but when he did speak Shadow came across as charming and witty. Half of the class had been preening for and fawning over him through the field trip.
Quiz had not been part of that half.
Shadow reached out to put the glasses on Quiz’s face but she recoiled and backed away from him. After a moment Shadow just handed Quiz the glasses and let her put them on herself. “You really shook the leaves off that tree,” he said. “Of course, it serves him right, after the way he jumped in front of you.”
Quiz stared at him. “Are you making a joke?”
“Yeah.” Shadow was grinning from ear to ear. “But I understand why you have to ask. You can never tell, not with the trees or anything else. Not in the Everfree.”
Quiz responded with a modest smile. For her, this was the equivalent to laughing out loud.
Shady called his name, and Shadow said “Well, back to work. Glad you’re okay, Miss.” Then he ran to see what his father needed.
“Well!” huffed Diamond Tiara. “Some fillies will do anything for attention!”
“Oh, shut up, Diamond,” snapped Apple Bloom. “You know full well Quiz would do anything to avoid attention.”
Sweetie Belle caught Quiz’s eye and began making scribbling motions in the air, signaling that she wanted Quiz to send her a ‘Note.’
Quiz had created a variation of her Magic Blackboard spell which she called ‘Notes.’ Quite simply, the spell allowed one pony to send a magic note to another. Sweetie Belle couldn’t cast the spell herself; but she could respond if Quiz sent her a Note, and she didn’t have to sing to activate the magic, she merely had to hum.
Sweetie Belle wanted to use the spell to pass notes in class. This was an application Quiz had never intended, and she couldn’t convince Sweetie Belle that Miss Cheerilee would not be fooled by glowing magic notes hovering under the desks. Also, Sweetie Belle wanted Quiz to send her a Note every night after they got home from school. Quiz found that if she did then Sweetie Belle would want to chat all evening.
However, Quiz was curious about what Sweetie Belle wanted, so she sent the Note.
“?”
Soon, there was a little leaf of note paper, glowing a pretty blue, hovering in front of Quiz.
“Isn’t he dreamy?”
It took Quiz a moment to work out a response.
“Do you mean Shadow? Yes, I suppose he is quite handsome.”
Sweetie Belle was grinning maniacally as she composed her response.
“I think Shadow likes you!”
Quiz ended the conversation by not responding.
#
“Are you still angry?” asked Cheerilee.
“A little bit,” admitted Fluttershy. In fact, she had been fuming through the entire field trip, but this being Fluttershy nopony noticed. “It really isn’t fair. This was supposed to be my year.”
Fluttershy had been trying to organize a school field trip to White Tail Wood for years. The Parent – Teacher Association had dragged their feet and found excuses to put off the excursion again and again, but this year Fluttershy had been certain that it was finally going to happen.
There were so many wonderful things in the Wood, and Fluttershy had been just dying to show them to the children. The beavers had expanded their dam, and it really was a marvelous construction. This had increased the size of Willow Lake, and water fowl were nesting on the lake in record numbers. Fluttershy had also set out a salt lick in a wide clearing, and you could almost always find yearling fawn frolicking in that meadow. It would have been, and should have been, wonderful.
Then celebrity naturalist Shady Stalker had swooped into a town meeting and turned everypony’s head.
Shady was eager to promote his survey of the Everfree Forest. He swore up and down that he had mapped out a section of the Forest that was safe to visit, and he offered to take anypony who wanted on a tour. Before Fluttershy knew what was happening everypony had forgotten all about Whitetail Wood.
Fluttershy was actually in favor of Shady’s natural survey. It was long overdue and still ridiculously underfunded and staffed only by Shady and Shadow. She just didn’t want it promoted at her expense.
What was most irritating was that the Mayor had jumped on this idea because the Everfree Forest promised exciting possibilities for tourism. Whitetail Wood offered some of the finest nature hiking in Equestria, but it wasn’t exciting. It was just safe.
Fluttershy didn’t believe anything could ever make the Everfree Forest safe.
The Mayor even asked for ideas for a tourism motto. Fluttershy had suggested, “Come to the Everfree Forest. You might accidentally get killed.” It was the last time she would get called on during that meeting.
Fluttershy stomped her hoof at the memory. This disturbed a dead leaf.
“There, there,” said Cheerilee in her best soothing voice. She had worries of her own. There were two conventions in Ponyville that day and all but two of the volunteer chaperones had dropped out. Cheerilee needed to keep Fluttershy focused. “At least it’s been an entertaining excursion. Shady is quite the showman.”
“Show off is more like it,” grumbled Fluttershy, who immediately thought better of it. “Oh, dear, was that too harsh? I don’t mean to be too harsh.”
In fact, Fluttershy had to admit to a growing admiration for Shady’s skills. He was the best animal handler she had ever seen, and he had a wealth of knowledge that he presented engagingly.
However, Fluttershy thought it was a shame he was so clownish.
#
“When you think of the Everfree Forest you tend to think of monsters,” lectured Shady. “And perhaps that is a healthy attitude. But the Everfree is a very lively and varied ecosystem. It is filled with wonderful animals, and only a small percentage of them will actually try to eat you.”
Faster than the eye could follow Shady snapped up something off a tree branch. He turned and held up for everypony’s inspection a bright green frog that was almost as big as his head. “There’s this pretty little girl, for instance. She’s a giant flying tree toad.”
The frog jumped from Shady’s hooves and took a perch atop his head. Its membranous wings draped over the sides of his face, making it look as if Shady was wearing a lime colored bathing cap – with eyes.
Shady lowered his head and stepped closer to the foals forming a half circle in front of him. “Go ahead and touch her, she doesn’t bite. That’s unlike her close relative, the giant flying vampire frog. You can tell them apart only from her cousin’s protruding fangs. Oh, and also from the fact that she’s not trying to get at my throat for some dinner. Shadow, could you please get her off me before she marks her territory in my mane?”
Shadow rushed forward to remove the frog from his father’s hair and return her to her tree.
Shady called on Snails. “You, Sonny. You look like a fella who knows his creeping mollusks. Did you know the largest slug in Equestria lives in this forest?”
“Sure,” said Snails. “Limax caddis rex, the stone gatherer slug.” Snails could surprise you with his knowledge, but only if you asked him about gastropods.
“Right,” said Shady. “So named because they build shells by gluing together stones they pick up. Would you like to see one?”
“Boy, would I, Shady!”
“Good, because your friend is leaning on one.”
Snips shrieked and jumped away from the pile of rocks he was resting against. The rocks rose slightly off the ground and began to glide slowly off the path and into the undergrowth. The slug made a noise that sound like an indignant “Harumph!”
“The Everfree isn’t as dangerous as you have been told, children,” said Shady. “But it’s still a good idea to be careful what you touch.”
Shady noticed a pegasus mare whispering to a little purple unicorn, she seemed to be urging the little one to put her hoof up. He heard the girl’s harsh whisper, “Mom! I’ll look stupid if I ask that!”
Shady called on them. “Do you two have a question?”
Dinky shook her head stubbornly, so Derpy sighed and asked for her. “Shady, have you ever seen a galumpalump?”
Silver Spoon laughed and Diamond Tiara snorted derisively, but there was a chorus of agreement from the rest of the class. Clearly, they were all grateful someone had dared ask.
“Sorry, guys. I haven’t seen, heard, or found any signs left by the legendary galumpalump. That doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist, or has been misidentified. The Forest is filled with undiscovered species. But I no one outside of Ponyville has ever heard of the galumpalump. I think it’s just a local legend.”
“But, Shady,” Fluttershy politely interjected. “Everypony who lives near the Forest’s edge has heard the galumpalump call at least once. I’ve heard it three times. Those were very scary nights.”
At the mention of the galumpalump’s call many of the children responded with their best imitation. “Oogie, oogie, oogie!”
“Yes, but the galumpalump is most often heard near Nightmare Night,” Shady pointed out. “And I couldn’t help noticing the Ponyville Joke Shoppe sells a galumpalump call. However, if you are all keen to see a real Everfree Forest monster then follow me. I’ll introduce you to her. We call her Martha.”
#
“Shadow, what sort of tree is this?”
“Shadow, what’s this flower called?”
“Is my tiara on straight, Shadow?”
“Do you like working in the Forest, Shadow?”
“Do you visit Ponyville often, Shadow?”
Apple Bloom rolled her eyes. “Just look at those two, makin’ a spectacle of themselves.”
“It’s what Diamond and Silver do best,” noted Sweetie Belle.
Scootaloo laughed. “You’re just mad because you want to make a spectacle of yourself!”
“He is really cute,” admitted Sweetie Belle, dreamily. “Don’t you think so, Quiz?”
“He is very clever,” said Quiz. “Has anypony else notice that Shadow seems to be the only one who knows where we are going?”
#
“Not that way, Dad,” called Shadow. “Martha’s clearing is to the left.”
“What’s this way?”
“The giant spiders, Dad.”
“Oh. Well, let’s save that for later, maybe…”
“Giant spiders!” gasped Pipsqueak. “Cool!”
Half the class heartily agreed and the other half went “Eww!”
“Yes, there’s a colony of big top spiders this way. They get the name from the huge tent like webs they build, and their colorful markings, which remind some ponies of circus clowns. It’s really most impressive, with at least 100 individuals in the colony and a ‘tent’ anchored by five ancient trees. But we need to hurry if we want to catch Martha in a good mood.”
Shady looked up to check the sun’s position. He could barely see it through the canopy. “Martha is a manticore with a litter of four kittens. We have been slowly gaining her trust, but we still need to approach her carefully. She has a clearing with a big, flat rock in it. This time of day the sun strikes it just right; and Martha likes to sun herself and rest while the kits play in the grass. If we’re all very, very quiet she’ll let us watch until she’s finished her afternoon lie down.”
Shady led them, dramatically creeping slowly forward, exaggerating every careful step, until they rounded a bend and were in the clearing.
It was empty.
There was the clearing. There was the high grass, much off it flattened as if large animals had been frolicking there. There was the flat rock, catching the afternoon sun perfectly.
There were no manticores.
“I did warn you, Dad,” said Shadow. “She’s been acting all skittish lately. I think she’s moved her den and found a new hiding place for the kits.”
“I should have seen it,” muttered Shady. “The whole Forest is on edge, you can sense it. Something’s been stirring things up.”
“Oh, well,” said Cheerilee, trying her best not to sound disappointed. “At least this looks like a lovely spot to have lunch.”
#
The children sat on and around the big flat rock and ate from the brown bags their parents had prepared for them. Some ate slowly, as it had been a long walk and they were tired. Other ponies ate quickly, eager to get back to the tour. They had missed out on the manticores, but there were still giant spiders to see.
Silver Spoon, Diamond Tiara, and some of the other fillies tried to chat up Shadow.
Sweetie Belle noticed Quiz staring off into the distance, her ears scanning the air. “What is it, Quiz?”
“It should not be so quiet,” said Quiz. “There should be bird song, and insects…”
She did not finish. The ground began to shake.
The boulder disappeared into the ground and the whole clearing began to slide in after it. Somepony screamed “Run!” but it was much too late for that. They were all soon tumbling down a deep, dark pit.
Hooray! She is back. I wish Shady spoke in more an Australian accent though. Make him drink a Foster's.
Glad to see more of Quiz. Great chapter, I'm looking forward to more.
Yay!
I frigging love Quizzical, and this story is looking to be good. It will be interesting to see if sliding into the ground causes any flashbacks to the diamond dogs.
Buck yeah... reading now!
...
We need a snowflake emotocon
"Come to the Everfree. You might get killed." Hey, it's the perfect motto. It beat out "The Everfree Forest is perfectly sa--- Yeaaaahhhh!!!!!! Arrrrhgg!! Get it off me!! Help!!! gurgleleleblug....." by at least three votes....
2032546 It's a reference. Do a search on YouTube for "Come To Australia, You Might Accidentally Get Killed."
Got crock hunter referance quick...
stingrays still make me sad.
I'm halfway tempted to ship Fluttershy and Shady...
Could be interesting, assuming he doesn't get stabbed in the chest by the manticore.
2032734
Quizical Greystone, lost in the woods?
Yup.
This is going to end in equations isn't it.
Most likely.
Bring it on.
Emperor's New Groove references aside, want.
2032734
Accidently?
I think Australia is the last bastion of the worshippers of Gaia, and the massive number of poisonous and deadly creatures (and plant life) are defensive in nature, and are completely and totally designed to be deadly by gaia herself.
Now as to what they're guarding, I have no idea. But if you want something to stay hidden, stick it in the middle of the most unpleasant, painful, poisonous, malicious, just-plain-evil continent on the world and watch as the puny mortals (except a few) avoid it like a plague.
Yay, new Quiz story! And Silver Spoon is one of the tagged characters? Hooray! (I hope she's not a villain in this one... she seemed nicer in Thweet Geniuth than previously.)
Never change, Quiz.
Shady reminds me of Steve Irwin.
Black coar, red mane, names Shadow....
What you did there. I SEE it.
2032845
Houses in Australia have their door handle raised up high, so that little kids won't be able to go outside without supervision. Though it's dangerous enough inside your home. It's the freakin' real world equivalent of a video game last level. Oh, and Australians hate pickles on their hamgurgers. Would rather have beets. Or so I have been told.
2033629
I love pickles...
Oh, so you mean it's That One Level.
Considering how dangerous Australia is, it should be no wonder that whenever I play Pandemic I choose Australia as the starting point.
Oh, Fluttershy
Since several of you have picked up on it, I think I should say a few words about accents. I'll admit that, when I first imagined him, Dr. Shady Stalker seemed a lot like Steve Irwin. But as the outline progressed and I got a better picture of him I realized that Shady isn't Steve Irwin. He's part Jack Hanna and part Jeff Corwin (the frog on his head scene is pure Jack Hanna). So I never came right out and gave him a Canterberra accent. Yet I still hear it in my head as I write Shady's dialogue. So I leave it to you, readers. Enjoy the voice in your head as you read.
Also, it's bucking difficult to express an Australian accent in print.
Sweet baby Luna in her cradle, call in the professionals... we have a Mary Sue.
Well, not yet. The makings of a Mary Sue. Whether or not he saves the day using nothing but the power of his left hoof is a decent indicator.
Come to think of it, is Shadow a Pegasus, Earth, or Unicorn? I don't think that was answered.
2044611 Now, that's not entirely fair. If I had wanted to write a Mary Sue I would have done it with Quiz....oh. You don't think she's...awww, Gee. I'm going to pout now.
2044611
Pegasus...
2045789 Actually, he's an alicorn, didn't I mention that?
But seriously, onyxjew is right, I never mentioned that Shadow is a pegasus. I only implied it by saying that his dad is one.
A bit of a typo there.
Awesome reference.
Well, I think it's about time I finally read the rest of Quiz' stories!
Nice start! We got Fluttershy, the Everfree, romantic drama, and Quiz! Yay!
*takes out some popcorn and sugery treats*
Ok ponies, time for another dive.
Gotta send out some Quiz notes too.
derpyhoovesnews.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/it_begins.png
I've never quite understood why these "field trips" have been so important. I mean I guess I can understand Fluttershy finding joy out of showing other ponies stuff that she finds interest in but doesn't it seem a bit extreme to arrange a field trip with the school in order for her to fulfill her desire at self-gratification?
If she thinks that somehow this will enrich the students lives all I have to ask is how? Most of these ponies already have their cutie marks and as a result should know what kind of jobs they want to get when they grow up. I'm really having trouble seeing how learning about crocodiles and beaver dams are going to help a student who say, has a cutie mark in accounting. Short of a cutie mark in taking care of animals, or becoming a scientist that studies animals and flora, I don't think this field trip will help them in any way.
5444971
Humans have special talents too, even if we don't have cutie marks denoting them, and we still believe in studying a wide range of topics because you never know what will come in handy, and frankly it really IS enriching to learn about various kinds of things. These ponies are in elementary school, learning the basics, and anyone who knows kids knows that they like seeing the real thing more than just seeing pictures. Oh, let's not forget that these ponies live near both the forests discussed as field trip spots, and it NEVER hurts to know more about the wild places and creatures near your homes.
5649794 Maybe. But what I'm just confused about is the age group. I'd say that ponies of all ages would benefit from this type of experience, but Fluttershy remains adamant about only having the elementary school doing it? How come people are more interested in showing this type of stuff to children when they're less likely to understand than to older ponies who will understand the importance of it? Couldn't Fluttershy also advocate for the high school and college to go on these field trips as well?
When I heard "giant spiders" I thought "It's the Hobbit!"
I'm shipping FluttershyXShady...
I wonder who Shadow's mom is... and if he and/or his dad are relatives of Fluttershy, well, my ship'll be sunk...
Oh, and rereading! It's still good!
Typo:
"notice" -> "noticed"
A very promising start, consider my attention grabbed.