this story made me hnnnnnnnnnng

it also reminded me of this rap song

But yes sir, i like it very much, can I have another slice ? Please.

Can we have a end like this for your other fic "Progress". No, I'm just kidding

I can't way for another chapter of your TwiDash challenge.

Cédric

wow, i read that like 5 hours ago, really takes a while to pass que queue.

not need to tell, a great work, a nice reference with surprise.

and congratulations to the first complete story of the challenge, 19 more to go

darkho off and as always, nicely done

I have the "It's Over 9000" soundbite from DBZ on my iTunes, mostly for shits and giggles.

My songs are always on shuffle, so what are the odds that that soundbite plays as I click on this story?

THE WORDCOUNT IS OVER NINE-THOUSAND!

I am so sorry.

The only bad part about being your editor is the excitement I get when I see a new TwiDash, and that feeling getting immediately crushed when I realize I've already read it.

I really wish I knew how to embed youtube videos. Oh well.

In any case the title reminded me of this song.

I'll read this later.

Can't wait to read this. Looks cute

This was just wonderful. Thank you for writing.

It wasn't written like I had expected it to, but damn...

Definetly one of the best romance stories I have read. The Pinkie & Fluttershy ordeal was the first thing that brought me to tears, the second was Dash proposing.

An absolutely beautiful story that deserves to be read by everypony on this site.

Don't stop writing, you have an amazing amount of talent, and it would be a shame to let it go to waste.

>>14984531498453

You'd be doing yourself a dis-service if you didn't read it.

>>14983581498358

Here in the Add comment thinger hit the You-Tube Button and type in the URL or the web address. Pretty much the same one you put in your add link one there.

>>14987171498717Thanks. I can't wait to read it now! Here, have a musical present. I love sharing my music preferances with the world, and have an amazing day, good sir or madam.

>>14987391498739

Why thank you Sir/Madam I as well like to spread my musical interests. So by judging the song you sent me I avoided my metal and found this. Please do enjoy.

Music

>>14987721498772Ha, that song was pretty sweet. Kinda Coldplay-like, to be honest. I luv Coldplay! And I liked that song you gave me, so I'll give you softer Rock song by one of my all time favorite bands ever.

>>14988241498824

I've heard there stuff before. Not bad. While not entirely my style I am not some idiot that will go and bash it just because it's not my exact style.

The song you sent me in a way reminded me of a song on the edge of my style. This one.

I will end our back and forth on this comment board here so as to not annoy the author with a bunch of comments not pertaining to their story.

If you wish to continue this musical sharing just send a PM.

If not then have a good day and good life.

-

YourBronyGod

*BLAM!!* Right in the feels!!

>>14984441498444

Heh, you and I had the same idea.

>>14991981499198 That we did

It's just.....so ungodly amazing. Really. This has literally just knocked at least 1o different fics out the window and is sitting as one of the absolute best pieces I've read. There are so many feels in this fic, all of them good. All of them so well developed and realistic. There isn't any needless tragedy to create tension, everything is completely possible due to time. Even her end thoughts are something that I can see any person feeling and the dynamic of Rainbow helping Twi realize how much more there is in life to enjoy just....ahhhhh it's too amazing. I don't care what you ever think of yourself, after this there is no doubt that you are in fact The Wizard of Words.

heart warming, sweet and beautiful the best combo for a good fanfic i like it how it goes over everything as a long friendship report and a one at that i believe it could make a man with a heart of stone share a tear or two.

A man once said: a great love is like a good memory, if fores it or push it, it will seem fur fer away but if you sit wait and if your patient then maybe just maybe it will come to you.

Rating: READ THIS FIC

im the ponyfic critic and i read so you don't have to

First off, because I'm just a nitpicky person, a few errors here and there. Nothing that couldn't be glossed over, so no big deal. And this story is complete, right? So that thing saying the story is incomplete is false?

Now, for the most important part.

Wizard of Words, you brilliant, brilliant man.

This story made me smile like a goofy bastard. Thank you for taking my shitty day and spitting in it's face.

This story shall be re-read in my future. This story has the ability to make me happy no matter what happens in my life. Thank you for just being so awesome.

This story starts great, but there's one little thing I want to say, if that's ok with you. Could you please slow things just a little bit down. Twighlights other feeling and the development of the relationships of the mane 6 could be depicted more detailed.And somehow Twighlight was easier to convince to a marriage than to an one night stand in other stories. I know that she was thinking about this a long time ago, because Twighlight nearly never does something without long thinking, but you can let her tell us more about this feelings. That would be nice, if you don't mind.

Oh wow.

That was adorable.

EQD. now.

OH CELESTIA THAT WAS THE MOST SADDEST STORY AND HEART WARMING STORY I HAVE EVER READ!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!       OMG SO MUCH LOVE!!!

NEVER EVER HAVE I FELT LIKE THIS BEFORE

You sir are a master!!!

>>14979851497985>>14984441498444>>14991981499198

All your songs are belonging to me.

>>14982551498255

Yeah, one down, 19 to go...

>>14992961499296>>14986401498640>>15027371502737>>15005541500554>>15011381501138

I'm glad you liked it. And it is complete now, so no worries.

>>15027671502767

Submitted... Waiting...

>>15025561502556

I understand where you are coming from, and I did try to do that at first, but I guess the reason why I didn't was because Twilight was trying to explain how these big things happen over time, and I gave them an unspoken relationship between Applejack, Rarity, Pinkie, and Fluttershy's incidents. If I had spent longer on her thought process it most likely would have altered the pacing of the story compared to the rest of the fic, which would have been damaging.

Some more thoughts from me...

I liked that Twilight started to freak out. It's exactly like her to overthink and rile herself up over little things like this. Good characterization there.

I didn't like how rushed the TwiDash was. Twilight kinda went into blow-by-blow description storytelling in that part. As it was the narrator recounting her own love tale, I would have liked to see that part expanded upon. Maybe mention how Twilight had felt something for Rainbow, maybe have her realize that she and Rainbow had shared feelings for one another prior to the Wonderbolts letter, and they were clearer in hindsight. It was such an important part of the story, and it kinda feels as though you glossed over it.

>>15036731503673 Then I'll set us up the bomb

YEAAHHHH feature bar or box, i rly dont know, nethertheless congrats,

ps. i still think the feature bar ( or box) sucks

You wonderful person, my heart melted.

Awww This feels me with such warm fuzzy feelings

Great damn story, only have one question, what about Spike?

A story that rends the very barriers that one has set around their heart and soul, singing beautiful symphonies of wondrous emotion that cascade through our heart, nay, our very manifestation of ourselves, enticing us with it's teases of true love and care, as well as it's true content, the lesson that the best has truly been saved for the future. It is a manifestation of wonder, and I hereby classify it as one of the Great works of TwiDash, if not as one of the greater works in the entirety of fictionalized stories under the romance genre on FIMfiction.

Long story short, loved it to atomic pieces. Thank you fully for the brilliant and truly wonderful work!

Good story. Very good story.

Very good I liked it a lot

That was a beautiful emotional roller coaster

Uh.. Muffin's confused here..

this. this is beyond beautiful. i loved reading this.

But... Rainbow... how did she... how did Twilight... what? What sorcery is this!

Anyway, i think you just destroyed my heart with all the d'aww this story contains. I applaud you good sir! you have earned yourself a stalker.

...I'm at a loss for words. Just take all my likes and be proud of this masterpiece.

i cant explain this in words so i will post this

Image: http://i.imgur.com/U10A6.jpg

so good but so feel

And then it was an Unicorn colt and RD was like "D'aaaaaaaaaaaawww... time to make another baby. This time eat lots of bananas, i heard that will make sure the baby becomes a pegasi."

Well, I thought that this story will be a kind of epic prologue for a "RD and Twighlight become parents" story

Nicely done! I loved it all (sucker for a good TwiDash), except for the two marriage proposals, which seemed to come completely out of nowhere. Just two extra paragraphs giving some background to set them up would've at least made them plausible.

Dude... that was deep.  Bravo *slow clap*

sir that was beautiful. This story is the reason I love this site. You are truly an excellent writer. I cried. Twice.

10/5 stars

Normally i detest past tense but his made the past tense worth it, the turn to the future at the end was lovely. Bravo Sir. Bravo

>>15240231524023

I can't help but agree.

The perfect juxtaposition of the bittersweet, loss and gain, tempered trials and tribulations...

I just...

I don't.

My heart is heavy, yet filled with joy. I cry tears of sadness, yet the corners of my mouth are pained by the goofy grin it sports. My hands shake with mourning as my chest heaves with laughter. I feel full. I feel empty.

I'm following you, Author, because I have a sneaking suspicion.

The best is yet to come.

>>15392761539276

I must resist making a pun...

I loved this story, from start to finish.  I started crying when I finished it last night: it made me stop, look at how I was living my life, see an ugly truth for what it was and make me want to change it.  Not that I have a bad life: far from it, but I can see now how I can do so much better.  I'm still in the rough stages of change: the last few weeks have been particularly tough, and it's been a long time coming anyway, but this has been the perfect catalyst for setting me on the right track.

From someone on the way to changing their life for the better: thank you for writing such a beautifully optimistic and inspiring story.

>>15399861539986

Don't pun-ish me for my feels, there might be pun-itive damages.

WOW.

okay, although this line:

“Twilight?” The angel’s voice called me, drawing me from the edge of a bright brilliant dream. “Will you marry me?” How could I deny my angel?

almost ruined the story for me because of how unrealistic it was, it was quickly balanced out by how emotional the ending was. This is a perfect portrayal of what life is, and it's one of the best fics I've read. Amazing.

So many feels...SO MANY FEEEELS!!!

>>15150331515033

........

.....

..

God freaking dammit.

After reading your "Progress" story, this was a good change. It still had a similar feeling though. Not sure how to describe it, I guess it's just the way you write.

>>16421801642180

Good to know! thanks man!

Hello, I'm back after actually reading the story. Not what I expected, but that's not a bad thing.

I just thought this would be another TwiDash story, but everything that happened in the story just all collected into one gigantic ball of feels.

This one is definitely one of my favorites. Good Show.

When it came to Cloudsdale, I had to have Loyalty by AcoustiMandoBrony playing.

Mmm, I'm gonna feel like a jerk for saying this, but I think it needs to be addressed regardless.

You tried to do way too much with this story, and I believe it suffered because of it.

It moves so fast, flying from significant event to significant event, touching on them only briefly before flying off again, wildly landing at another moment in time.  Now, I'm not saying I didn't enjoy it -- the writing was good, really no problem with grammar, and I definitely felt some feels -- but a lot of what I did feel was lessened because most of it was only a glimpse, and a good portion of them came completely out of left field.  For example, the bit when Pinkie ask's Fluttershy to be the mother?  I didn't necessarily feel my heart being warmed, I think it was more something like this:  "Wha?".  There was near to no build up, nothing alluding to their feelings for one another, it just sort of happened.  One shot, it happens then its done, moving on to the next scene.  The emotion you had there felt cheapened by it, because it honestly felt a little forced.

Anyway, another example would be the TwiDash moment, when Rainbow proposes.  Again, right out of left field, it just happened, and Twilight just says "yes".  She does go on to admit that it was fast, yes, but that sounds like a cop out, a quick escape.  I really wouldn't be near as miffed about it as I am, had we been shown some relationship build up to it, but that sadly didn't occur, so I am.  The TwiDash in general was heart warming and fluffy, but that brings me to another point.

I think this fiction was really just a bunch of fluffy frosting, without the nice, delicious layered cake underneath.  It's a gathering of fun and important scenes from their lives, and that's it, really.  There's not much driving motivation for anyone, or a consistent conflict, and because of that there really isn't much to become drawn in by (also, not every story needs to end with the ridiculously happy "they had a baby" deal... no offense ^^;)

I did like the little internal conflict Twilight had about her life, and what's going to come after this moment.  Although, I don't really think Dash's explanation solves it very well.  The reason Twi is worried that disappointment is all she has to look forward to now is because she already has everything she could ever want, When Rainbow essentially says "We can always continue to dream, to wish for things to come", that doesn't solve anything.  Twi already had all she wished for, there's nothing else she wants, that's why she's worried; Dash, you're not helping >_>

Overall, it's pretty good for what it was.  A kind of feel good fic that highlights all the great moments in their life.  The writing is good, and the feels are there, but I just don't think it stacks up to all your other stories.

It has a lot of potential, but you tried to cram so much in, you ended up taking out what was important, and that's depth.

>>17632851763285

Fair response. I admit, I felt myself that it was rushed in a few parts, but I didn't know how else to add depth without making it into another massive epic, you know like the other three I have going. Hopefully I'll be able to fix that issue in some updates, but I do appreciate the honesty.

>>17633281763328

No sense in making another epic if you don't have to, especially if have three going already.  Besides, this would be one long story, and I'm more interested in what you already have, honestly.

On that note, I do believe either Progress or Slender awaits.

>>17633751763375

Slender is unfinished, though I hope to have that done before the year's end. Progress. I'm happy with it until the ending, only because I don't know how believable it is, personally. I'll leave it for you to judge.

>>15036731503673 Sir, i freaking love you!

I love Twidash more than  love my games (and thats a lot) and your stories makes my feels fly over the intire galaxy, finds a huge fucking rock, and then come all the way back and creates 2012 with my head.

And now im just gonna go sit in a corner and cry

This was the biggest turn around from your other story that I read that had me thinking creepypasta (in a good, somewhat morbid kinda way) And I'm glad you wrote it. Very, very good job.

DAWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

I never asked for this.

I never asked for all these feels: all this happiness and all these sad feels.

But then everything changed when the fire nation attacked.

On a serious note, you have an impressive amount of writing talent. I hope to see you furthering your skills and your selection. I love TwiDash ships (without clop, mind you), and after reading A Bluebird's Song (which every single person here needs to go read), I have become very picky on which stories are good. The bar has been raised to a level I have never seen before with A Bluebird's Song. However, you have succeeded in creating a story that I enjoy. Kudos.

>>20873072087307

Well, I'm complimented you enjoyed my story, very much so. Kinda shocked you compared it to Bluebird's Song, only because this is one of the most spontaneous things I've ever written. I'd like to say I have better stuff on my page, but then again, to each his own.

Still I'm glad you liked it, really.

But, then the Equalists began their revolt.

>>20873172087317 I didn't compare it. I told you that the bar had been set high by A Bluebird's Song.

Still enjoyed it, still say you are a good author.

This was beautiful, nothing more, nothing less. This is a story that does not need praise or adulation. It is simply what it is and what it is, is simply beautiful.

The second story to only ever make me tear up.

Image: http://img.pandawhale.com/32342-Troy-Community-why-are-you-mak-Pz4v.gif

This story was absolutely amazing. I honestly started to tear up more than once while reading this. You are one heck of an author. I am glad bats linked to you in his blog post.

Amazing story, thanks for making me cry like a little bitch.