This is not the Equestria you know. This will not be the Mane 6 that you love. Changelings... will be about the same.
Join me in this Cross-over/Alternate tale of Equestria that merged with the world of the anime/manga -Claymore-.
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Author's Notes: Surprisingly, this crossover/alt-world hasn't been done before. At least, not that I've come across. Much like other fusion stories out there, characters from the source will be subbed by characters from MLP. I won't say this is a *direct* retelling of Claymore with Ponies, but it'll be relatively close. Also, on a legal note, both MLP and Claymore are copyright of their respective holders and this fan-fiction is made solely for entertainment purposes only!
-Also, first fanfic EVER, so by all means, feel free to be brutally honest & critical and if I need to correct something grammatically (no one's perfect), please let me know which part in the comments. Thank you much and hope you enjoy the story.
-Characters will be added/taken away as the story progresses. GORE tag will be quite true, though *shouldn't* be heavy enough for a -Mature- rating. If I should upgrade the Rating, please let me know. The "Human" tag is more for the Anthro aspect of the story as opposed to being humanized versions of the characters. I'll still use the MLP terms to describe the characters, just know that they're on two legs as opposed to four... most of the time.
-Cover art is a commission piece I got from the awesome Space Weasel of DeviantArt. He can be found here: http://www.furaffinity.net/user/spaceweasel2306/
*Big Exhale*
Wow. That took a bit longer than I expected it to. Thanks for reading and I hoped you enjoyed the first chapter of my very first fan-fic!
-This one will probably be the longest chapter of those to come, due to setting the scene and getting characters introduced and general emotions across.
I love the anime Claymore and if you are familiar with it as well, I hope I did it proper crossover justice in your eyes.
Obviously, some of the characters will be OOC. Such is the nature of it and certain characters' personalities will be *DRASTICALLY* changed to fit the theme and their replacements. Even if you aren't a fan of Claymore or have never seen it, I hope that you are willing to give it a proper try.
Also, current cover art is filler. The real one is a work in progress. Should turn out to be pretty awesome.
Must read. I was actually considering writing a Claymore crossover a month or so ago, and even re-watched the first half of the anime for it.
Question: Will you be limiting yourself to the anime, or will you follow events in the manga that take place later? I admit that I haven't read the manga myself, but I've heard some of the plotline, and the series makes a very big change after the events of the anime.
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The anime and the manga do pretty well at following one another up to a point, then the manga continues while the anime (SADLY) pitters out. I'll be using the anime more as a reference until it gets to that split moment, then start referencing the manga.
1451029 Yes! Finally, somepony did a Crossover of one of the best Anime series of all time and MLP.
It's pretty good, but certain aspects could be better. 
They are just certain elements that writers should try to follow when crafting each chapter, such as alliteration, conveyance of your character's personalities, and story flow. All of these are good, but could be improved upon. As for spelling and grammar: The Elder collected himself and sat back down, his fingers steepled before him. "And you know this how, MIss...?" the I in Miss needs to be lowercased.
I look forward to the next chap very much. 
Hngh
Looking forward to more
1455212
Duly noted and thank you for the feedback.
As for the grammar mistake, I hate it when I do that.
1455217 Take it from someone who is writing a 600k+ story...it happens a lot. No worries.
A unicorn with hands, huh?
> The guards left the side of the Elder and started encircling the body Lumber Knot, helping to push the crowd away.
I think you're missing a word here.
> the Elder on his hooves, his hand splayed across the table from where he slapped it.
Hand?
> If we start accusing and pointing fingers at each other, it'll only lead to panic.
Finger? I realize we've got Spike as a major character with fingers (claws), but in a pony-dominated society, I doubt it would be a common turn of phrase.
> She was covered head to hoof in a long, dark-brown trench coat that, while large, still managed to emphasize her femininity. A horn rose from her head, perched just behind it was a fedora of the same color.
I believe you mean the fedora to match the color of the coat, but it's a little ambiguous. Also, aren't the representatives of The Company supposed to wear black?
> Dangling from a finger was a pair of cobalt blue headphones
Finger?
> "You're mighty outspoken, aren't you? To answer, yes, it is our job and that's the exact reason why you pay us. Should you refuse, we'll leave you "brave" ponies to deal with the issue yourselves."
You've got nested quotes here; this should be 'brave' not "brave"
> You're very well of the rules.
Missing a word
> He wasn't the only, as almost every pony around him stopped their work and looked towards the village front.
Missing a word
> with mid-thigh and waist being obscured by a metal-studded, tanned leather skirt...the naked bladed extended down past her left calf.
Waist and Calf are not generally body parts attributed to a horse. If she's got the sword across her back as in the series, then it wouldn't go anywhere near her rear legs, anyway, the tip of the sword would be near her tail.
> she reached up and pulled the sword from its sheath and into a horizontal cut in one smooth motion.
Is there any particular reason why she's wielding the claymore (a sword designed for use with two hands in the real world) with a hoof, leaving her in an unbalanced three-legged stance? The fact that the sword is design for two hands (hooves) is also a problem. The Claymores do occasionally one-hand their weapons (esp. the one who dual-wields), but the weapon is designed for two-handed use. Have you considered the option of the Claymares fighting bipedal, Lyra style? Alternatively, since we've got a unicorn already and they're collectively witches, why not wield the sword with magic? (That option does cause some problems with a few characters later if you want to stick as close to Claymore canon as possible, though.)
> I'm here b/c I was hired.
Don't do this. Use the full word.
> The Claymare's sword had shattered into the stone flooring.
This sentence is awkward; it sounds like the claymore has been damaged.
> the Changeling, who had fallen to it's knees.
its
> the mare's right arm, the one holding the claymore, began flexing and expanding starting at the wrist
A horse's arm does not have a wrist. Biologically, the closest thing to a wrist is the knee (the major joint on a horse's arm). Ponies in MLP occasionally hold objects in their fetlock (the joint just above the hoof).
1455369
Thanks for the proof.
A number of those are stupid mistakes that I sometimes get in my own proofreading of it. Got 'em. 
As to the anatomy issues, it's anthro based. That's how I read most of the stories on here and that's how I'm choosing to write this. I make note of this in the Author's Notes in the description, hence the Human tag.
Again, greatly appreciate the help!
Oh, and I'm enjoying this quite a bit so far. Looking forward to more! You need to be a little more careful about exactly what you're pulling from Claymore -- slamming 'hands' onto tables, for example. You also shouldn't be afraid to deviate a bit from the original Claymore story. It gives you more flexibility for fitting in MLP characters sensibly, rather than stuffing square pegs into round holes.
For example, Twilight has been somewhat written into Claire's personality, but with the limited amount of interaction you've had so far, you could easily shift her back towards her canon personality. It would change some of the decisions Claire makes, which could lead to changes in the Claymore story. You could also have Twilight have exactly her canon personality in Claire's flashback to her childhood, and demonstrate her personality changes -- but the events of Claire's life wouldn't necessarily change Twilight in the same way that they changed Claire.
1455394
Oh, didn't see they're supposed to be anthro, my bad.
Question: will this be a crossover with the anime or the manga? The two play out differently and the anime has a slightly disappointing ending, so I'm just a little curious.
I can tell this is going to be... (deep breath) AWESOME!!!
Woo-Ha! New chapter complete!
I promise the next one will be more action oriented. Also, if you are familiar with the show, you'll know that this was the end of Episode 1. Chapter III will be ALL of Episode 2, but with a twist! I'm taking the suggestion to put my own spin on the Claymore story to heart, so expect to see TWO characters added in the next one with new perspectives
(hint, hint) 
I did proofread this one more carefully than I did my first two, BUT as always, if there are any glaring mistakes, do not hesitate to let me know. I'm always working to get better
So it's based on the anime? Just so you know, the manga is way better. Especially since the anime has something of a rubbish ending.1462471
1464415
I'm going with the anime to begin with. I'll transition into the manga when it gets to the appropriate point. The anime does do a decent job of following the source for the most part. I really wish they had kept it going.
1465877 Same. I don't know why production companies don't wait a little longer before televising mangas: it can lead to some really rubbish endings.
Enjoying this quite a bit. Was pretty disappointed with the cold turkey ending the anime had, good to have another outlet of Claymore goodness!
Also love the choice of Spike as Raki, though I hope you eventually make him a bit more useful than he was in the anime
> He glares at the top, "Buck this hill," and begins walking/shambling into the forest.
) "Walking/shambling" -- pick one verb, don't try to use both.
You've shifted to present tense here. Present vs. past isn't an issue, so long as you're consistent. (You're using past tense everywhere else, so I recommend sticking with it.
> "I'll stuff you like a fat pig... when next I can."
It's possible this is a direct quote, but the bolded part is awkward; you may want to consider rewording it.
> Real Claymares never themselves that!
Missing a word
> wrapping a large claw wrapped around his head
You can probably remove either of these two to fix the sentence.
> the Changeling yelled, seemingly to nothing Her voice was a combination
Missing a period here I think?
> "These Claymares are..."
This is in italics and also in quotes; is it supposed to be dialogue or thoughts?
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The issue is that in Japan there is a very low bar for getting the first season of an anime published; further seasons are much more difficult.
1467501
Raki actually becomes pretty badass in the manga. He gets swordsman training from an awakened being.
Waaaitaminit... Is Rarity playing the role of Teresa here? Then that means...
.
.
.
1467501
He later turns into a total badass in the manga and I think I'm going to do that with Spike also. He is a dragon after all, so it would make sense that he can kick ass.
Raki was SUCH a waste of space!
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Once again, you are a Godsend! I appreciate it.
And no, Rarity is not Teresa, so don't cry. *SPOILER* Rarity is probably going to be in Chapter IV.
1467987
Awesome to hear! Looking forward even more to future chapters!
1467987
Throughout the entirety of the anime (and the first part of the manga), Raki served as the audience insert; a "regular" person that the viewer could associate with more than the comparatively alien Claymores. Sure, he was a wuss, but he did his job.
I don't normally make editor comments on stories except for maybe an egregious error here or there that nobody else mentions -- usually I just let my mind fix errors on the fly and I ignore them -- but I like what you've got a lot and I want to see it succeed.
That said, may I recommend tossing your story into the Looking for Editors group, either in the Looking for Editors or Looking for Prereaders folders? I'm happy to help, but I'm no dedicated prereader.
I'm glad to see this update!
(Oh, and I really like the new cover art)
Should be giving
Need either a comma after "what", or else a dash (ha, pun) after "what" and after "who" (instead of the comma).
The parenthetical is awkward. The rest of the paragraph you've got she/her referring to Lightning Dust, so you should probably keep it that way.
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Changes made! Once again, thanks for that.
Thanks for sticking with this story!
i really miss clare
I'm not saying that this story is bad ( I have yet to read it
) but if somepony can point me towards other stories with Claymore crossovers I will be very thankful for your help. 
Umm....if that's the case then why don't you use the Anthro tag instead of the Human tag?
Arbor strikes me as the kind of guy who is genuinely offended when his employees quit because he won't pay them for their work...