- Member Since 30th Aug, 2015
- offline last seen 40 minutes ago
Lighttone GryphonStar
I write stories because I enjoy them. I want to do better and am willing to take any advice to improve.
Lighttone GryphonStar
Joined 30th Aug, 2015 ·
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”Thunderlane, one of the best wonderbolts in the country, was her target” i assume it was copy paste from last story and forgot to change it to his instead of hers?
11842310
Yeah, that line for sure. Thank you for catching it, I'll fix that right now. I didn't see a desire to describe him differently if he was just going to suffer the same fate as before. Everything else though is unique. Making not all the actions were the same, while keeping a similar story made this one of the hardest one shots I had to write.
Makes me wonder how the Werewolf Applejack version is going to go.
a happy ending except for thunderlane of course ask will there be more fic of the 6 manes in rule 63
11843435
Funny enough, I've got two Applejack 63 on the list. Another one featuring Coloratura(Almost finish) and one with Cherry Jubilee(Just a blurb so far). There a Rainbow Dash 63 X Lightning Dust (Also still a blurb), one more Butterscotch, this time featuring Gilda(Will be working on that today), and finally a Dusk Shine X Tempest(Finished and proofread) which will be going up for Christmas
11843435
If there are any other Rule 63 characters you want me to take on, don't hesitate to ask.
11843547
Since you mention it, I have some ideas, well almost ideas.
sunset glare:
1:glare x the dazzling ones
2: with starlight glimmer
3: anthology of both past and present with celestia
4: I would say one with twilight although it may be somewhat predictable
elusive:
1: with saffron masala (I don't know why, really)
2: with ember x barb (I also imagined myself with gabby)
3: another anthology although of mares like coco pommel, sassy saddles, fleur de lis and etc (when I thought about it I imagined it with a nightmare elusive)
artemis:
1: fulfilling the fantasies of some of his subjects
2: artemis x daybreaker
solaris:
1:solaris x sunset x twilight
2: solaris x the rulers of other kingdoms
bubble berry:
1: bubble berry x skystar
with the characters that you already had ideas about
AJ:
1:AJ x zecora
2: AJ x autom blazes (or Butterscotch)
rainbow blitz:
1: rainbow blitz x spitfire
2: rainbow blitz x Ms. Harshwhinny
3: rainbow blitz x daring do
dusk shine possibly the most predictable
Dusk shine x sunset shimmer, trixie, moondancer and maybe flare warden (either anthology or standalone fic)
I would have mentioned something about the 5 manes or the princesses but I don't know if this will seem repetitive to you
Well, you wouldn't call these ideas ideas but requests, whether you want to accept them or not, not is a problem and if you do, don't rush take your time I just wanted to share them.
11844363
Wow, that's some list. Let's see. I'm assuming Sunset Glare is Sunset Shimmer 63, the dazzling ships with her have been done to death on this site so I might just skip out on that, not sure what else I could add to such a thick genre. Same goes for twilight/Sunset/Starlight X any of the Princesses.
Pinkie Pie in general is just very hard for me to write. I do have some stories planned, including some 63 ones, but don't expect me to pop those out over night.
Most of those Applejack and Rainbow ones has been done just as much as the Dazzling ones, but I might a Daring Do one already in the pipeline, I'll need to check.
As for Dusk Shine, yeah. Pretty all the rivals outside of Trixie will be having solo one shots with Dusk Shine. I think Dusk X Trixie has been done way too heavily for me to add anymore. And yes, I already have an Dusk X Rarity on the list, it' still just a rough draft though.
As for Elusive. Ember X Elusive, almost finished. Elusive X Saffron masala, mabye I can tackle that after July if the current short story I'm working with saffron masala doesn't come out too similar
11844647
okay thanks
Pretty nice story, hot too.
However, regarding the plot, one thing kinda bothers me:the explanations...don't make sense? Why would ponies look at him differently if he was cursed?And WHAT ponies would look at him differently if basically no one else besides the Apples know the secret? I assume memory wiping magic exist, so why not use that to protect "his fragile life" after he is cured?
Also wouldn't it be a better explanation the fact that Twilight did this to him and if the word came out, she'd be in trouble?
11848398
Yeah, I would recommend the previous story where the explanations are expanded in the comments, but that one also has a far worse idea in covering things up. When it comes down to, curing Fluttershy/Butterscotch and memory wiping wouldn't remove the guilt and tons of bodies hidden on the farm. It's just a bandaid. Even if the entire country was mindwiped after the curing, somepony would eventually stumble upon the bodies.
And that's just it, I want people to be concerned about the endings of both these versions. Because simply satisfying the beast was never a good plan, but the only one Applejack could see at the time. Yes, brash, yes idiotic, but that's the point.
I've already got two more sequels planned. 1. Applejack gets into worse shit trying to hide it. 2. Exploring the darkest possible ending but with wereapplejack on Fluttershy
11848462
Yeah, but that is because YOU decided that wiping the memory would not remove the guilt and shame. Most of the time, even if it's canon, in fiction you can change things how you like, since it won't alter the story more than it already is. I mean, Flutterbat IS canon, but she didn't do in the show the things she does in this story, right? Don't get me wrong, it's just a silly story and a silly argument, but it just happens to be my pet peeve and I would've been happier with more plausible explanations(like you said, at least explain that the memory wiping still keeps the guilt).
11849104
I never meant it wouldn't get rid of the guilt and shame. The memory wipe wouldn't get rid of the massive amount of bodies bury on the farm. Look at it this way. Applejack and her entire family have the memory wipe, thus they don't remember the bodies and later stumble upon them after the fact, what happens next? They either remember or go in search of the murderers, not realizing they did the deed, leading them to the one who cast the memory wipe and thus revealing to them what happened and bringing back the guilt.
Because somepony else would eventually find them and the cycle would happen again.
********************************************************************************
When it comes down it. I WANT TO EXPLORE THE BAD ENDINGS And I will explore it every single time if given the chance.
11849187
But who says the Apples need to have their memory wiped?I only meant that they should wipe the memory of Fluttershy, since she is the cursed one.
I honestly feel like you overcomplicate things a bit. My scenario would be something like:"Hey Twilight, can you or Celestia cure Fluttershy?Yes? Good!Do it and then wipe her memory about her being flutterbat so she won't live with the guilt".
I never said that the mane 6 needed to have their memory wiped, since they can all act like it never happened and even in the show no one talked about flutterbat besides, ironically, fluttershy in that halloween episode.
11849235
No matter who gets the memory wipe, in the context of this story, it still wouldn't remove the bodies. Fluttershy could easily stumble upon them herself after being cured and memory wiped. The point of these stories isn't simply that Ffutterhsy feels guilty, but that what will the Apple family do to hide this guilt from the rest of the town. That I answered. You're the one complicating things by assuming I mean different characters.
11849291
Ok but by not having their memory wiped, doesn't that mean the apples can hide the bodies better and just be sure that they aren't discovered?And since fluttershy will be cured, there won't be any more bodies.
I understand the guilt and all, I just pointed out that in the story, the explanations don't make sense and are not satisfying enough, at least from my perspective.
11849306
And that's perfectly fine. I'm not after an absolute answer. If this was one, it wouldn't be so dark. Taking the easy way out is not why I wrote this series. I want to explore the hardest choices. Plus, these two are not even the darkest choices I could explore. Just give me some time to finish the next two. I'm planning to post both in April.
nice work
11874534
Awesome. Good to see you reading the rest of the series.