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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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And now...we wait
aww its so sad yet so terribly sappy
Ok, in all honesty, how long did it take to cone up with all those note/pickup lines??
That was one of the most epic things I have ever read...
That was really creative, the whole first letter thing. How long did that take?
2124382>>2124728 Don't talk... Brain hurt now... So much... Thinking!
2124827 Haha, fair enough.
I really think I wud've said one of those pick up lines to someone...
Another great chapter. You know, people may throw their rocks at me, but I believe it's your best story. Yes, even better than Know Your Mare.
The suspense is killing me, though! Will she say yes or... No, better not to think about it.
2125243
personally, it's a tie between this and The Grow Up...
and for as funny as Know Your Mare is, it's not actually a very good story...
Fancy Tuna!!!
I have a few corrections,
I believe you mean "locusts". (Locus is a point of concentration, a center.)
Same as above.
I think you meant "have me choose?"
This should either be "go no farther?" or "go nowhere?". By and large, "farther" is used to talk about physical distances, while "further" is used to talk about metaphorical distances. But this is one of those rules that isn't always enforced, especially when it isn't blatantly clear which type of distance you're talking about. In either case, it should be just "nowhere" or "no farther/further", but not both.
Probably want to go with "ice" or "crystal" instead of "day" for the first instance of that word. Also, I think you meant "recount". "recant" is to withdraw, typically a statement.
"oh" should probably be "or".
Those notes were hilarious, and I'm excited to see what she decides!
Please keep writing, I'll keep reading!
Bah! Now you got me feeling NOT bad at Octavia after reading this! Only now do we get to see how structured she really is in this story and why she would therefore take the time to think about such an issue even if it seems cold. Honestly though, I think she's just panicking over nothing; The DJ was right next to her for years already!
Oddly enough, this chapter felt like it developed more of Vinyl's character than Octavia's since it was more as to how Vinyl was percieved through Octavia's memories and that letter Vinyl wrote. I take it that Vinyl will do the same? Even if her way of thinking is different?
Finally, since I wasn't looking for it but recognize it very well, I'll give you the knowledge of the following statement.....
Mr Market's Rick Roll'd Count: 14
this is the greatest thing ive every heard
Okay, that note thing was ingenious!
This is cute and I rather like the letter collage thing. I gotta say though: you are seriously forcing the Octavia narration. It's trying to sound high brow and just comes out stilted.
Dial it back a bit. It's like when people over write AJ's accent. It doesn't work. Simple perfect grammar and removing a contraction here and there will do the trick better than round about sentences.
Okay, those notes were either pure cheese or pure gold.Might use a few of 'em myself. Also, they were some of the most real and genuine words I've ever read on this site.
This chapter was...good?
Are you telling us or asking us?
Well, without Serefin here to provide commentary on the story... That reminds me. Hey, Pit! How's he holding up?
Or anything ever
Not good.
i tried to do that once for a girl i liked in high school...it ended up in us making out in the black room (theater reference)
To sweet.
Aww...
But seriously, if Octavia didn't swing that way, what would it take to get Vinyl to stop stalking her?
Don't try this at home.