gathered his tho8ughts -- thoughts he flushed a soft pink -- He he sighed softly -- He it was only when -- It
The lore is pretty solid, but I'm not sure it's in the right place. Reminiscing on how abused other biodroids are feels a bit like something that should be hinted at, but not elaborated on in significant detail just yet. On the other hand, it might work just fine with a bit of editing, so his Celestia is at the center of his thoughts, rather than Biodroids in general.
I love world building and I think many people get bored because of short attention span but that is a reader problem not an author problem. Stories should be able to expand themselves to their fullest and it is good when it does even if some find it boring.
10670116 oh this a sweet and cute fic have you thought of doing a 2nd story to this with a certain adorkable purple princess.....maybe she could be a town assistant librarian who took over the library after the owner was too old to do it and she meets a kind man whos also one of the new bronies of g8 a future mlp generation whos down on his luck both financially and romantically whos trying to take care of his beloved mom who had cancer but is ill mostly all the time due to her poor immune system just thought id like to see more of this universe with other mlp characters
There were quite a lot of misuse of capital letters and a lot of sentences did not use capital letters in the beginning when they should've. Otherwise, great chapter!
The drilldown into the history and practical ethics of bio-droids was fascinating and disturbing and maybe even realistic, and I’m glad I checked out this fic for it alone
mandatory sterility of companionship units
In particular is very fucked up, though of course artificial wombs have other less terrible purposes that I’m excited about
Calling the biomod store the Chop Shop is inspired
And you gave Aldritch and Tia good chemistry to boot.
10669139
Not quite the reference, but also a good song!
That was fast.
gathered his tho8ughts -- thoughts
he flushed a soft pink -- He
he sighed softly -- He
it was only when -- It
The lore is pretty solid, but I'm not sure it's in the right place. Reminiscing on how abused other biodroids are feels a bit like something that should be hinted at, but not elaborated on in significant detail just yet. On the other hand, it might work just fine with a bit of editing, so his Celestia is at the center of his thoughts, rather than Biodroids in general.
10669161
hey now, it's just a kiss, keep the pickle in the pants >:3
I like it so far
I love world building and I think many people get bored because of short attention span but that is a reader problem not an author problem. Stories should be able to expand themselves to their fullest and it is good when it does even if some find it boring.
10669164
I don’t like pickles
:)
;)
10669750
Thank ^^
Oh, this is going to be an interesting tale.
Oh this is interesting.
10670116
oh this a sweet and cute fic have you thought of doing a 2nd story to this with a certain adorkable purple princess.....maybe she could be a town assistant librarian who took over the library after the owner was too old to do it and she meets a kind man whos also one of the new bronies of g8 a future mlp generation whos down on his luck both financially and romantically whos trying to take care of his beloved mom who had cancer but is ill mostly all the time due to her poor immune system just thought id like to see more of this universe with other mlp characters
You have checked all my boxes for a good story, I will wait with baited breath
Give me more sci-fi world building please
10670612
I do take commissions, you know ^^
10670622
thank you!
Interesting story, looking forward to the next chapter!
10670763
thanks!
There were quite a lot of misuse of capital letters and a lot of sentences did not use capital letters in the beginning when they should've.
Otherwise, great chapter!
10857488
Thank you! Some of it is names and intentional stylization for the misplaced capitals, but as for the missing ones, an editor I am not, lol.
Well, you got internet culture spot-on
The drilldown into the history and practical ethics of bio-droids was fascinating and disturbing and maybe even realistic, and I’m glad I checked out this fic for it alone
In particular is very fucked up, though of course artificial wombs have other less terrible purposes that I’m excited about
Calling the biomod store the Chop Shop is inspired
And you gave Aldritch and Tia good chemistry to boot.