The Bizarre Adventure of Three Fillies

by TemporaryName

Chapter 7: Test Drive

Outside of Sugarcube Corner three friends sat with the embodiment of chaos. They wanted to find Zecora, but despite their best efforts complications arose. Firstly, none of them knew where she went or would've gone. The CMC thought they would find her where there was a fight – Discord told them that stand users attracted one another, and usually the result wasn't pretty – but that led to their second problem; everything was quiet this afternoon. For a citizen of Ponyville, this was neither unwelcome or unusual. For three of the resident chaos magnets, it would've been a welcome reprieve on any other day. For now they sat on the ground and shared potential resolutions to their issue.

“Arrgh!” Scootaloo exclaimed irritably. “How hard is it to find one stinking fight in this town? We should've found something by now; a pony running away, a crowd gathering, property damage, something! But what do we find instead? A great big pile of nothing!”

“Your right about one thing,” Discord leaned against the wall, “any public spar or brawl usually causes some disarray, stand battles doubly so. Yet all is quiet for once in this town, meaning our striped friend and her hatted foe are either far away from here, in the Everfree Forest perhaps, or the fight is already over and we missed all the fun.”

“Well, at least we have one less stand user to worry about,” Sweetie breathed.

“I never said that,” Discord spoke, eyes half lidded from boredom.

“Now hol' on a sec,” Applebloom started, “are you sayin' Zecora might've lost?”

“Oh, absolutely.” The Cutie Mark Crusaders flinched back at his casual declaration. “Haven't you been paying attention? The powers of stands vary widely, and no one knows what limit they might have. He doesn't even need a strictly more powerful ability than Zecora; just a good counter to Iron-Wood Kid or one unconventional enough to confuse.”

“Aren't... aren't all stand abilities unconventional?” Sweetie Belle asked?

“Only most of them, but otherwise you hit the nail on the head.”

The three fillies silently contemplated the new information before Scootaloo asked the question that was on or would be on everypony's mind. “If that stallion could beat Zecora, what are we supposed to do when we run into him?”

Discord's face lit up at the question. “An excellent point Scootaloo! Given you three have been stand users for less than a day, given only two of you acquired a modicum of control over your powers,” Scootaloo released an annoyed huff, “and given the stallion of the hour's experience, the most responsible course of action would be to go and call the authorities.” He leaned towards the fillies. “Of course, since when have any of us taken the reasonable path?”

The four continued sitting in front of Sugarcube Corner, discussing their next course of action. Applebloom wanted to go this-a-ways, Scootaloo wanted to go that-a-ways, and Sweetie Belle was fine going either way, but wanted to exhaust another avenue first. “Discord,” She asked, “If stand users attract one another, just like you said before, then wouldn't the four of us sticking together draw him out?”

“If it were that easy, we would've tripped over him on the way here,” The door to Sugarcube Corner opened, the bell chimed. “It's just not a something you can just take advantage of, so unfortunately we'll be hunting him for however long it would take and I think that's him right there,” Discord finished, pointing at a teal stallion walking past them, wearing his obnoxious door adorned top hat and carrying a box of pastries on his back. “Huh.”

Unwilling to question their ridiculous luck, the Crusaders approached the stallion. “Excuse me, sir?” Sweetie Belle asked “Do you have a moment? I just need to ask a small question.”

“Hmm. I suppose I have time,” The stallion replied. “Just make it quick; my luck's been poor today and if my treats here get ruined one more time, well, I'm not sure what I'm going to do. Otherwise, ask away.”

“My friends and I have been looking all over Ponyville for another friend of ours, yet we can't find her. Have you seen a zebra mare today? Mohawk mane, tends to speak in rhyme?”

The stallion's face remained almost completely stoic as he gave his answer, his tone cool and inflection casual. His only reaction being a widening of his eyes. “Did she have golden rings around her neck?”

“Yes! Quite a few, in fact.”

The stallion gave it some thought. “Yeah, I think I know who you're talking about. We bumped into each other and had a conversation so engaging that we just had to go somewhere private to fully indulge in it. I mentioned my house since it was fairly close, and only left to grab some snacks. If you want, I could bring you three back with me and you can see your friend again.”

“I don't know, on the one hoof Rarity always said to watch out for strangers. Buuut we really need to speak with Zecora, and we do technically have an adult with us.” As Sweetie Belle gestured to Discord, who casually waved back at the terrified stallion, the other crusaders pitched in their own two cents.

“Ah say we go with him; If he tries anythin' funny it's four 'gainst one.”

“Yeah, I really need to ask Zecora about – about that thing! Lead the way Mr...”

“Hoof.” The stallion replied with calm tone and wide eyes. “Slight Hoof is my name. Remember it when you're filling out the check for my window repair.”
“I don't know what you're talking about, Mr. Hoof,” Scootaloo replied with innocent smugness.

“I saw you throw the stone.”
“With what? My weak wings? My tiny hooves?”
“I've also seen the chaos you three frequently bring upon this town. At least the broken window didn't involve tree-”

“Ugh. Can we please get moving already? I have places to be, things to do and standing here still as a statue helps with none of those,” Discord interrupted.

“Case in point aside,” Slight Hoof started, staring at Scootaloo, “we can argue about your debt to me in a more private setting.” He began walking and the CMC plus Discord followed close behind. Privately the four didn't buy a single ounce of the manure Slight Hoof spouted and prepared themselves for the inevitable betrayal. So when they finally arrived at his house, the fillies thought they were ready for everything and Discord knew they weren't. Slight Hoof casually opened the front door and stepped aside. “Ladies first.”

After a second's hesitation Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle started towards the door frame. Before they crossed through they realized one of their party hadn't followed. “Applebloom,” Sweetie Belle asked. “Aren't you coming? I'm sure the nice stallion means no harm.”

“Doesn' that there room look a little dark, gals?” Indeed the hallway before them was more poorly illuminated than the thickest thickets of the Everfree. Lesser foals would sooner run home than enter such a foreboding area. But the Cutie Mark Crusaders were a cut above their peers; one hundred plus dangers faced over the course of a few years does nothing if not instill some measure of courage. “Ah'd feel better if Mr. Hoof turned on a light.” Applebloom's statement was tempered with courage and caution in equal measures, and the other two agreed.

“Yeah,” Scootaloo stated. “Mr. Hoof should at least open the blinds or pull back the curtains. It's the middle of the day, let some light in!”

Slight Hoof tried to stay stoic, though the minute his eyes flung over his failure became apparent. His mouth became a desert and his leg muscles tensed in anticipation. 'Drats! These fillies are smarter than they look! These foals showed no signs of these powers before, no indication they ever saw Roadhouse Blue, so they have to be inexperienced. Wait... aren't these the same fillies with the Cutie Mark Consultation business?' His gaze hardened at the thought. ' Oh dear. I may have underestimated them just a tad.'

Cornered like a rat, Slight Hoof calmly walked through the doorway and gently shut the door. “Oh, that was a close one.” Walking down the ominous, abandoned hallway, passing several pieces of furniture, he continued his indulgent monologue. “Blasted Zebra and her filly friends; couldn't they just leave well enough alone? Ah well, that Zecora character's freezing her flank off in the griffon empire, and I'm several towns away from Ponyville. All I have to do is wait until nightfall, walk back inside my home, get all my stuff, and figure out where to go from there.”

With his stand Slight Hoof grabbed the box of pastries from his back. “At least this time, I can enjoy my sweets in peace.” Unfortunately, the third time wasn't the charm as his package was yanked from his grasp, spilling doughnut and pastry alike unto the dusty, planked floor. Slight Hoof didn't see what caused this slip up, but he knew who caused it. When he looked back and found the door ajar, his suspicions were confirmed.

“You. You...” Rage and disbelief built upon one another. How did they overwhelm Roadhouse Blue?

“We figured you were going to lock the door,” Sweetie Belle started, “So I had Quiet Riot rush in and hold it open.”

“We heard everything, by the way.” Scootaloo's glare burned into Slight Hoof's soul as they strode trough the door. “I kind of hoped you were telling the truth about that chat, but I shouldn't have held out hope.”

Slight Hoof shook violently. “Y-you...”

“Also, when Ah said this here room is ominous, Ah meant no amount of blinds or curtains should keep a room that dark. Given what you said earlier 'bout the griffin empire, Ah reckon you have some kind of teleportin' power, right?” Applebloom's smug visage assaulted Slight Hoof.

“Tch. Spilling important info when talking to yourself; an understandable mistake, but a mistake none the less.” Discord really thought this guy would be better.

“YOU!” The stallion shouted as he rushed towards the door, pushing through the party with Roadhouse Blue and his own mass. “All I wanted was a nice, sweet snack after a job well done like any other pony. But do I get my fifteen minutes of peace? Do I get to casually indulge? No! First the guards start poking around Canterlot, then that Zebra harlot spills my smoothie, and now you four ruined forty bits of good pastry!” Roadhouse Blue grabbed Scootaloo and held her at eye level with Slight Hoof. “And that's not getting into what you did to my window!”

“Y-You never-”

“Do I look retarded? I know you used your stand!”His face hardened, losing some of the fluidity of rage. “If you're so adamant on not paying me back in either money or time, then I'll just have to take my pound of flesh!” As he was speaking, Roadhouse Blue's free hoof slowly crept upwards and would've struck Scootaloo were it not for Quiet Riot. When it slapped the appendage away from her friend, a bruise appeared on Slight Hoof's hoof, congruent to where his stand was struck.

“Thanks for the save, Sweetie Belle.”

“It's fine,” Sweetie turned to Slight Hoof, “I don't know what you had against Zecora, why you made her disappear. What I do know is you have one chance to bring her back peacefully. Refuse and, well, you're outnumbered four to one.”

“So,” Applebloom strode in, “What's it goin' to be?” The CMC stood tall staring at the foalnapping stallion, and Slight Hoof stared back. He had trouble thinking of a solution on account of the inferno of rage blazing through his mind. He tried to snuff it out, contain it at the very least, yet seeing Discord off to the side eating one of his pastries that he bought, it was as though oil and fat were poured on it.

“The future of my career is on the line. I cannot let a trio of fillies and an overgrown furred snake strip my prosperity from me!” Roadhouse Blue strutted towards the Cutie Mark Crusaders, malice evident in every step. “You make threats of violence yet clearly lack the experience to enact them; your posture and sheathed stands make that apparent enough.” The trio summoned their stands as his strut became a sprint, bracing themselves for a strike from Roadhouse Blue.

“Let's see how well you adapt!”

...A strike that never came as he rushed past them towards the dilapidated door they arrived through. 'He's probably makin' a getaway,' Applebloom thought, and her friends thought the same. When they saw him struggle to open the door, they took the opportunity to close the distance. Only when they were seven feet away did they think something might be up. Five feet away and Slight Hoof looked back on his pursuers, a smug smirk on his face that took the fillies two seconds too long to process. By the time the Cutie Mark Crusaders figured out something was amiss, that they might've made a big mistake in their first stand battle, it was too late to stop themselves. Their momentum carried them to the edge of the door as the stallion opened it. They didn't fly too far, and when they saw the landscape before them they thanked the heavens for their fortune.

Just a half a foot from where they stood was a train coupling connecting two cars, the gap between just large enough for an unobservant foal to fall into. On either side the landscape rushed past, the tan ground flowing past like rapids. Coupled with the heat that bore down on their backs and the fillies just knew they were in the middle of a desert, a theory that was cemented further when the occasional cactus or tumbleweed passed by.

'Yes. YES!' Slight Hoof thought as the fillies were distracted by the scenery. 'I admit this was a bit of a gamble, but I'm glad I took it. I'm no stranger to dirty deeds, but foal murder would put the fuzz right on my tail. Dropping them on the route to Appleloosa is the safest bet. Who cares what three stowaways would say about thieves with spirit guardians? Probably lock them up in a loony bin and throw away the keys.' He reached to the side of the door and the hinges started to creak. “Have a nice trip, fillies! I'll be sure to send you a postcard from the beach!” His mild grin evolved to manic glee as he slammed the door on the three fillies.

CLANG

Something was amiss; Slight Hoof had intimately studied all manner of doors in his day, testing the limits of his stand as anyone would in his situation. A wooden door like this one was a solid, sturdy, and simple piece of architecture that remained unchanged through the ages, and in all his travels, no matter how hard he slammed these doors, never had he heard a wooden door go 'clang'. Come to think of it, the door didn't look completely closed. 'Oh no,' Slight Hoof thought as he gently pushed the door, only to find the force applied inadequate. “Oh no,” he verbalized as he saw the shaft wedged between the frame and the door.

'Can't believe he fell for that twice in a row,' Scootaloo thought from the other side. Yes, breaking off a bit of handrail wasn't the most elegant solution, but neither was assaulting foals or abandoning them on trains. She was sure the latter legally counted as child abuse, and certain the former did,. What little sympathy she might've had for the eclectic stallion before was ripped out by the roots, burned to ash, and used to nourish her righteous anger. Fantasies of vengeance could wait, for it was only a matter of time before Slight Hoof shrugged off the shock of being duped and adapted to the change in circumstances. “C'mon fillies, let's head back inside!”

With stand and hoof the three overturned Slight Hoof's feeble defenses and burst through the door. He took a step back, solutions not forthcoming in his mind. 'Calm down Slight. There are plenty of doors in this place, each one a portal out of here. All you need is time; just one unexpected alteration of circumstance will send these inexperienced fillies in a tizzy.' His eyes narrowed as the door shut behind them. 'Hmm, now that I think about it, I might have just the thing.'

“Keeping my portals open like that, I admit I'm a fool for falling for that trick more than once.” The Cutie Mark Crusaders were surprised at his admission, and their shocked faces stayed as the stallion continued. “I will endeavor to not make the same mistake again, the same mistake that had cost countless ponies, griffons, and other creatures their lives. The lesson all must remember, stand users most of all! Do you know what that might be?” Slight Hoof pointed his hoof at the group. “Adaptability! To survive, one must always be vigilant, regard their surroundings and circumstances, and change their plan accordingly. There is an old proverb that the tree that bends with the wind shall not break, yet the tree that remains stubborn and rigid is doomed to splinter!”

The fillies were on edge at his sudden declaration, confused yet well aware he had something prepared. 'Jus' what's this weirdo gonna try?' As Applebloom thought this, Roadhouse Blue reached towards Slight Hoof's hat, towards the tiny door in the middle and the Cutie Mark Crusaders blanched. 'Y'know, maybe that dumb hat ain't so dumb after all. Still, what can he fit through such a tiny-'

Applebloom's thoughts and those of the remaining Crusaders were sliced in twain by the flood that flashed before them. Slight Hoof was standing back, his stand holding tightly onto his hat as it spewed gallons upon gallons of water. “I'd say I did quite a lot with it so far. In only thirty-one years I've been all across the globe! Equestria, Griffonstone, Sequestria, The Badlands, just to name a few places.” He kept his aquatic assault on the fillies as he approached. “On one of my travels I went for a quick dive. Made it all the way to the bottom despite the pressure surrounding me. Can you delinquents guess what I found down there?” His question was answered only with screams of fear and pain.

“Since you're busy now, I'll be kind and answer for you. At the bed of the sea rested a sunken ship! Sadly I couldn't find any treasure down there, no chests of gold and rubies, but I suppose the door to the captain's quarters is prize enough. I admit I don't know how far down I had to go; one hundred meters? Two hundred meters? Five hundred? Eight? It's deep enough that the water bursts through my hat door like a riot hose, and that's all that matters!”

'Ow ow ow why did this have to happen?' Sweetie Belle thought. 'This is bad. Really bad. Worse that usual. We have to shut the door quickly before our flesh peels off. Maybe I can.... no, he'd notice if I reached out with Quiet Riot. He isn't being blinded by a flash flood in front of his face. I can't throw anything strong enough to overpower this stream and I don't think either Applebloom or Scootaloo can either. Right now the only ponies who could cease the current are himself or Discord . 'Wait. Where the hay is Discord!' From Sweetie Belle emerged Quiet Riot. 'Ah screw it, I think I have an idea.'

Seconds later Slight Hoof stopped in his tracks. Where once his mind was filled with self assured victory, now it raced with irrational fear. It had to be irrational, right? Certainly he wouldn't have neglected some detail in his plan? There weren't that many details to overlook! His body shook as each paranoid thought blazed through his mind. Those fillies were planning something; they had to be! The hat door slammed shut, ceasing the cascade of water as he took a step back, followed by another. And then he took another before getting a grip on his emotions. He couldn't run now; his career of crime, his fugitive future, his very life depended on silencing the credibility of these fillies! They must've wanted him to run away as much as they wanted to cease their dousing. A cunning plan if he'd ever heard one! Yes, he was wrong to underestimate those three, so very wrong.

“Is...Is he going to be okay?” Scootaloo wasn't quite sure what she was seeing. Sure, Slight Hoof's twisted face spoke of great worry, and how his eyes darted from one corner to another to a third and back to the first cemented that opinion, and she knew it likely had something to do with Sweetie's stand levitating right behind him, hidden from his jumpy gaze. But the technical details of what's going on? What Sweetie was doing and what she hoped to accomplish, Scootaloo could only guess.

Well, only one way to find out.

“Whatcha doing, Sweetie Belle?”

“I'm buying us some time,” Sweetie whispered. “Quiet Riot can influence and intensify emotions through music. Emotions such as rage and fear, though I suppose paranoia is more appropriate here. Since it nearly turned a market square into a mosh pit from 'singing' at a normal volume and I didn't want us cowering with him, I figured lowering the volume would reduce the effective range.” The filly looked a bit sheepish as she rubbed her forehooves together. “I'll admit, it was a bit of a gamble doing this; It could've easily blown up in our faces, but it was worth it to get the pressure off of us.”

“Well that's swell an' all, but what's the plan from here?” Applebloom asked?

“Honestly, the next step is figuring out the rest of the plan.” The incredulous looks her friends gave her did not go unnoticed. “Look, we had to do something and it's hard thinking with gallons of water barreling towards you. Did either of you think of something at the time?”

“...Not really, no,” Scootaloo admitted.

“Ah've got an idea,” Applebloom pronounced with proud posture. “Ah just need Y'all to buy me some more time. Think you can handle it, Sweetie?”

“I should. Don't know how long Quiet Riot's fear inducing serenade will last, how long we have until this dummy gets his senses back, but it should be long enough.” When she saw Men at Work summoned and sprinting towards across the floor, Sweetie had only one question on her mind. “If I may ask, what exactly is your plan?”

Applebloom smirks as she starts her explanation. “Yer stand makes music? My Men at Work can create jus 'bout everythin' else, so long as there's material to work with nearby. It made a hat of grass and repaired a wheel with mud, so somethin' to tie up Mr. Hoof should be a piece of cake.” Sweetie had to admit, what she heard seemed like a good idea, especially if they could keep him away from any and all doors. “Stands have limited range,” Applebloom said, mirroring Sweetie Belle's thoughts, “an' while we don't know what his is, Ah don't think it can go that far. If it could, why run towards the door in the first place?”

“I KNEW IT!” Slight Hoof suddenly yelled, voice raised as the fillies' faces fell. “I knew you were plotting something. I knew there was some trick you had up your sleeves! It is fortunate you three are nothing but inexperienced little fillies! Rule number four of combat; don't speak your plans in front of your foes.” Suddenly, Roadhouse Blue bucked Quiet Riot right in the face, sending Sweetie Belle flying and silencing the terrifying tune. Remnants of the stand's effects echoed though his thoughts, but pride and victory at his foe's folly aided its alleviation. He ran towards the nearest door, his stand keeping his hat in place, and turned back towards the fillies.

“Normally I would've run away long before our conflict escalated to this point, but you three have proven yourselves troublesome, learned too much, and displayed dedication beyond the norm. A friend I booted out of Ponyville, I will admit. Did I over react? Probably. So let's just forget about this encounter and start again?” Roadhouse Blue grabbed the doorknob beside him. “You want your zebra friend back? I'll open the door to where I left her.”
“Do you really think we're going to fall for that again?” Scootaloo asked in disbelief. For as much as this guy droned on about their inexperience, he certainly never learned how to build and maintain trust. Generally you don't make the same process immediately after breaking the first one and expect anyone to believe you.

“No, really I'll do it. Look!” A wide eyed Slight Hoof opened the door, showing a snowy small town beyond its frame. The Crusaders saw a few scattered griffons strolling about, one looking at them in utter bewilderment. “See? Civilization! Citizens! Right there as proof of my sincerity! Even if she isn't there, how hard would it be for you three to get back home?”

“Considering there isn't a settlement primarily populated with griffins with that much snow in Equestria's borders,” Discord interjected dryly, “I'd say it would be almost impossible for three fillies without a passport to return home.” The faint whiff of amusement in his tone died. “I know from experience the 'joys' of international customs.”

In spite of shrinking pupils, the stallion kept his confident stance, kept tempting the fillies to step through the portal. To his surprised relief they stepped closer. 'Yes!' Slight Hoof thought. 'Just a five steps closer, little fillies! Just five steps closer and if you still feel trepidation, my Roadhouse Blue will give you the push you need to cross that threshold.”

Four steps left.

None of the Cutie Mark Crusaders believed the thief for a second, his wavering tone and crooked eyes paralleling his wavering confidence and crooked morals. 'Either he's desperate or we're playing right into his hooves,' Sweetie Belle thought, 'Perhaps both.' He did say he didn't want to kill the three, that it wouldn't sit well with him, but you don't have to kill something to defeat it. Her sister's friends have shown them that lesson plenty. Discord's earlier comment rung through their heads again.

Three steps.

And where was Discord during this fiasco? Leaning against the back wall, confection in hand, enjoying the battle of wits he came along to watch. Sure, he could intervene and save the fillies the trouble; there wasn't much risk to his health if he did, even with his magic suppressed. Magic he didn't need to see this for what it was; a necessary lesson for the trials of the future. That, and he didn't feel like helping.

Two.

Scootaloo stopped her advance and looked around, eyes darting, daring to spot some sign of deception, some indication of Slight Hoof's master plan. Was it instinct that caused her pause, a gift of aviary evolution that aided her ancestors in evading threats? Was it the emergence of a more vigilant nature forged from countless misadventures and dangers? Or was it simple happenstance, a fluke of fate that for her to look around? The cause must be debated later, for the faint form of Roadhouse Blue was in her sights, and with it his intentions laid bare.

“Girls! Don't take another step forward!” Scootaloo's friends obeyed as her shout echoed through the house. “You weren't going to just leave us in a backwards village, were you Mr. Hoof? You wouldn't really leave three fillies to freezing, starvation, or a whole host of other nasty fates, right?” Slight Hoof stayed perfectly still, not even flinching at the accusation before closing his eyes and answering with a single resounding word.

“Yes.”

Before any could react, Applebloom surged forward unprompted, her friends only able to see Roadhouse Blue's legs out of the corner of their eyes. By the time her friends rushed to her aid, she was already beyond the threshold. Only with the combined strength of Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo's stands did they keep the door from being slammed shut. A stroke of fortune for Slight Hoof, who used the opportunity to strike with Roadhouse Blue, hooves bashing against the two remaining Crusaders, taunting them with a cruel choice: save their friend or risk his wrath.

On the other side of the portal Applebloom stood up and rushed towards the door and tried to force her way through. Though some progress was made, the door opening wider and wider, it was too slow for Applebloom. She knew the longer she took, the more likely she would lose her window of opportunity and be trapped in this frozen land. A chill crawled up her spine, and she knew it came not from the climate. How long could she survive out here? Could she survive out here? 'Best not risk it,' she thought, 'now how will Ah deal with... Ah've got it!”

“MEN AT WORK!”

With her shout her stand materialized on the other side of the door, countless tiny bipeds that rose from behind and flung themselves towards Slight Hoof. The tools were not designed for combat, yet getting hit by one was still painful, and Slight Hoof was about to get hit with around forty per second. It wasn't long before Men at Work latched onto him and dug into his flesh. It wasn't until the second cycle of strikes he noticed their presence and tried to shake them off, yet despite his best efforts only a few were dislodged. His gyrations grew more frantic as Men at Work dug deeper and deeper into his flesh. Driven to desperation, Slight Hoof's stand returned to his side and wiped away the nuisances.

Just as Applebloom planned.

When the door was flung open Applebloom stumbled through, crimson streams of blood flowing off of her. It took all of her strength to keep her legs from giving out from under her, to keep standing in spite of the damage both she and her stand received. Locking eyes with her friends, she issued an inspiring command. “C'mon girls! Let's get this creep!”

The Cutie Mark Crusaders' stands rushed towards Slight Hoof, ready to provide a beating for the ages. Their efforts didn't go unnoticed by the stallion, who chose to make a tactical retreat; it's not cowardice to run away when you're so clearly outnumbered, especially when the fight was more difficult than anticipated, the opponents quickly gaining a grip on their powers. As he ran away, he struck one of the walls, kicking up dust and blinding the fillies. With their retreat halted, Slight Hoof continued to the exit unimpeded, but not before witnessing a bird like silhouette toss a piece of debris at his flank.

“Gaah!” Slight Hoof yelped. He thought he had this fight in the bag! How did that orange brat – no, he knew how she got the drop on him. Typical Slight Hoof, you got so caught up in dealing with one nuisance you allowed the other to flank you. 'Whelp!' He thought. 'Guess it's time to cut my losses. I know when I'm beat, and I'd rather have an uncertain future rather than certain imprisonment.' He ran towards the door, grabbing the door handle with Roadhouse Blue. 'Just one portal and I can start again far away from here. I heard Zebrica is nice this time of yea-'

* SLAM *

Slight Hoof's thoughts were rendered moot when the door flew off of its hinges. As it crashed into him, blood gushing from his muzzle and flesh rippling like a pond when a pebble is tossed within, Slight Hoof could only wonder what just happened. When his gaze landed on the edge of the door frame, he got his answer. The bolts that held the hinges together had been removed. Not destroyed, not split in two, removed. He could still see them off to the side of the door frame, lying on their own. He had no doubt the brats did this, but how? HO-

His train of thought crashed to a halt when he crashed into the floor.

“Judgin' by how you haven' picked yourself up yet, Ah'm guessn' you're still processin' what just happened.” Applebloom slowly advanced towards Slight Hoof, Men at Work close to her side “Y'said your stand can turn any door into a portal by opening it. Well, Ah don't know 'bout you, but a door without a frame is just a fancy piece of lumber, and since I see what I expected on the other side of that there frame, so to does your stand.” Indeed, there was nothing on the other side of the door but the inside of a closet that stored cleaning supplies, like the dust covered broom leaning in the corner. “Ah admit getting' Men at Work to screw off the hinge bolts was a gamble, but it would've at least keep you from closin' it and lockin' us out. Now, it's a shame askin' you wasn't as fruitful as we would've liked regardin' our friend Zecora, but what else did we expect from a theivin' low-life like yourself?”

As Applebloom spoke Slight Hoof's eyes widened in a terror his face soon matched, his cares for maintaining a stoic facade thrown out the door the minute it flew off it's hinges. He tired to run out of the room, tried to find another door, a window, something to get away from these fillies! Yet not three steps were taken before the remaining stands backed him into a corner. With flight no longer an option, the only instinct left was to fight. Calling upon Roadhouse Blue one more time, Slight Hoof readied his stance, lowered his center of gravity, and prepared for the coming onslaught.

Sweetie's Quiet Riot was the first to move, clawing at the stallion with the determination and inexperience. The limbs moved too slowly, were too obviously telegraphed, and Roadhouse Blue dodged it easily. Scootaloo's stand was faster by comparison, leg shooting forth like a bolt loosed from a crossbow. If only she had the accuracy to match. Slight Hoof didn't even need to dodge her. His greatest foes in this fight so far had been the tiny figures that dismantled his avenue of escape. As before, Men at Work tore into him bit by bit, slowly rending him into an pile of raw meat.

That wasn't to say he didn't hold his own; for every bruise and scrape he received his stand blocked three. Fluid were Roadhouse Blue's strikes, agile were Slight Hoof's dodges, yet numbers soon overwhelmed the poor stallion. His worn body unable to keep pace with the rampant vigor of youth. Slower and slower did his movements grow, greater and greater were the number of hits taken. Even his accuracy took a dip, his stand striking the floor more frequently than the fillies at times. Something had to give soon, lest he give out. With all the will he could muster, Roadhouse Blue let loose one final punch towards Scootaloo. The filly dodged it with ease, and the stallion soon hit his true target.

On contact the aged, slightly rotted wood the floor broke away. The Cutie Mark Crusaders could not react quickly enough to avoid falling with Slight Hoof. His landing may have been shaky, having to bend knee to maintain balance, yet it was leagues better than the uncomfortable positions the fillies crashed into. At least he didn't get the wind knocked out of him. 'No doubt they'll recover quickly,' thought Slight Hoof as he ran towards the exit. The day could still be salvaged, if he only-

“Now now.” His sprint was stopped by the discordant serpent before him. “You weren't trying to escape so you could fight, steal, and lie another day, now were you? If you were, I'm sorry to say you wouldn't have succeeded,” Discord spoke in his usual smug tone as he leaned on the inside of the doorway. “I admit, you put on a good show there! Oh, how long it has been since I last saw a stand fight. I'd almost forgotten what it was like; the quick thinking, the rush of air as the two psychic forces collide, the mind games. Oh, how I missed it! However, even though you provided a good show, I'm afraid I can't just let you just walk out on us. Why, you'd drop off the face of Equestria, and we'd have to spend the rest of our lives wondering where our friend had gone!”

For a moment neither party moved, yet soon Slight Hoof's stance relaxed and a deep, dark chuckle left his mouth. “You? Keep me from leaving? With that shackle on your power?” A pointed hoof punctuated his point. “I do read the newspaper, you know, and there was nothing in today's issue about your punishment being mitigated. So tell me, Discord,” Slight Hoof spat, “How can you stop me without your incredible magic? Because right now all that stands between me and freedom is an overgrown snake.”

“You see, you're mostly right.” Discord replied. “I don't have my usual magic, and while I'm far from helpless without it,” Discord chose to ignore Slight Hoof's sarcastic roll of the eyes, “your stand does tilt the odds in your favor.” Discord then stood up straight, no longer leaning on the frame. “Lucky me, mine tilts them right back!”

“W-What?” Slight Hoof stuttered out.

“Oh come now, you've had to have heard of the legends by now; a chimeric serpent who brought forth the golden arrows, those that awoke the chaos within? Did you really think I wasn't curious? That I wouldn't taste the fruits of the arrows for myself?” As he spoke, an aura of sinister power enveloped him, coalescing into some shape too faint to make out.

“Hmm, so you do have a stand. No matter, like all magic it-”

“Stands are not 'like all magic'. As a pickpocket, burglar, and thief you must be either forgetful or very unambitious.”

There were no further words spoken, for Discord's interruption spoke true. Not that he forgot that little factoid, Celestia knows the number of heists that would've been impossible if that were the case. But was it too much to hope that Discord wouldn't connect the dots? Probably, if he was being honest.

Still, fighting one stand user was better than fighting one chaos avatar or three stand users. Adjusting his stance and bringing out Roadhouse Blue once more, Slight Hoof prepared for one final fight. Discord did nothing in response, simply standing as he was. Was he so skilled that he could bring out his stand in an instant? Slight Hoof's eyes widened in fear, his throat dried, yet he still he held fast. And held, and held, and-.

“Well?” Slight Hoof asked. “Aren't you going to fight?”

“Hmm, Nah.” Discord replied.

Slight Hoof took a step back. “What? You're not going – why not?”

“Don't wanna.”

“That doesn't answer anything!”

“You're right. It didn't,” A smile graced Discord's face. “But it did buy some time.”

Slight Hoof didn't connect the dots before a brief flare of pain in the back of his head knocked him out.

---

“Well, that was... a thing?” Sweetie Belle didn't know what else to say. After she and the other Crusaders dragged themselves off the floor and shook off the dust and splinters, they rushed towards what sounded like Slight Hoof. While they originally thought to simply chase him down and beat him up, when they witnessed Discord engaging him in conversation, they only saw a perfect opportunity to strike. Well, Scootaloo did at least.

“Couldn've put it better myself,” Applebloom replied as she tied the stallion's legs together with rope.

“Yes, everypony's first stand battle is sort of like that.” Discord strolled towards the Crusaders, arms gesticulating as he spoke.. “A puzzling mess one needs to solve with a third of the pieces missing. Speaking of which, how was it?”

Applebloom and Sweetie Belle only gave a blank stare, while Scootaloo calmly walked up to him and bucked his leg.

“Gah!”

“That was for not helping us,” Scootaloo spoke with venom, “despite having every opportunity to do so.”

“Were you really worried of any danger? You guys, the Cutie Mark Crusaders? I could've stopped things from getting out of hand at any time, and if I didn't let events play out and risk them getting out of hand, you three wouldn't really learn. In spite of my personal preferences, most ponies who seek to learn of combat of any type are apprehensive towards 'trial by fire', or as I call it 'the fun way.' And if nothing else trust me when I say this is far from your last stand encounter, and I won't be there to help with them all.” The Cutie Mark Crusaders mulled over his statement, and after much internal debate, Applebloom walked to Discord and gave him her answer.

A swift buck to the leg.

“GAH!!” If Discord's scream to the heavens didn't tell how much his leg hurt, his hopping about on one foot did. “Last time I ever try to help you gals! Ungrateful little...”

“We could've just had a mock battle with you, Sweetie Belle said. “Or Zecora. Or Celestia. Or Luna. Or a scarecrow.”

“Firstly,” Discord started when he could comfortably put his hoof back on the ground, “The notes you three would've taken had I fought him would've robbed you of the full experience of your first fight. Would my assistance really be worth it?”

“Yes,” All three fillies replied in the same tone, with the same inflection, at the same time.

“Oh.” Discord shuffled his legs awkwardly. “Well, what's done is done. What are we going to do with him?” Discord held an arm out towards Slight Hoof, now sufficiently restrained. The response the Cutie Mark Crusaders gave closely mirrored Discord's own not a minute prior.

“We didn't actually plan that far ahead,” Scootaloo admitted. “I personally thought we would just throw him in the castle dungeon, maybe chain him to the wall. That's how it works in stories, right?” Before the last syllable left her mouth, Scootaloo knew her reasons were poor. “Look, I'm no guard,” she said defensively. “You're the one with the most knowledge on these things, Discord.”
“Because I was imprisoned myself? If so, let me tell you stoning isn't always the best option.”

“I meant because you're an adult, or due to your thousand plus years of experience. But thanks for the third reason.”

“Couldn't one of us just go get Twilight while the rest of us keep an eye on him?” Sweetie Belle asked.

“That there's probably the best plan we have.” Applebloom summoned Men at Work and tried to carry Slight Hoof. After seven seconds of stubbornly failing, Applebloom instead asked her stand to create a cart to carry him. Men at Work scattered about, scrapping together whatever material they could find; the floorboards were stripped away, nearby furniture become naught but raw material to manufacture wheels, spokes and all.

“Should we contact Twilight about this?” Sweetie Belle asked.

“Can we contact Twi 'bout this?”

“Not us per say, but we could just ask Starlight.”

“What makes you so sure she can do something?” Scootaloo asked.

“Wasn't she Twi's apprentice or something?” Applebloom inquired. “Ah'd bet my life savings she has some fancy magic way to talk to her. Or a way to send a letter to Spike. Y'know, for emergencies and the like.”

The four tried to think of other avenues to pursue, yet as much as they didn't want to bother her, Twilight was the best bet for finding Zecora, and Starlight was the fastest way to talk to Twilight.When at last the cart was fully assembled, if a bit wonky in places where glue and other adhesives weren't fully cured, the fillies loaded up their captive and headed towards the...

“Did anypony ever name that castle?” Scootaloo asked? “I think we usually call it 'The Castle', 'Twilight's Castle', or 'The Friendship Palace', but are any of those actually its name?”

“I... Huh. I don't know. My bits are on 'Friendship Castle', since Twilight was the Princess of Friendship before the Royal Sisters abdicated.”

“Retired, Sweetie,” Applebloom replied. “They said they retired.”

“And I say Equestrian Royalty should know the proper terminology for legal actions they wish to take.”

“You're just being a pedant,” said Scootaloo.

“Oh, and now your usin' the fancy words?”

As the four departed towards the only crystal building for ten miles, arguing with one another over the most inane topics possible, as friends are wont to do they failed to see the pony hidden in the shadow of the house, eavesdropping on their conversation.

Her eyes were protected from prying gazes by a pair of sunglasses. Her fur and cutie mark hidden under layers of bandage, with only small tufts of orange leaking out. On her head was a bright red beanie, and her flank was bereft of a tail. The wrappings couldn't conceal her relaxed, cocksure posture, nor could the glasses hide how she looked at the party as they walked.

“So, Slight had a bit of a trip up, it would seem.” The mare tried to keep her emotions in check, yet a faint hum of glee leaked out. “Such a shame he fell to those three fillies. Where's your years of experience now, idiot?”

The bandaged mare slowly walked away from the wall. “Still, three new stand users awakened so soon? This town truly is as bizarre as I've been told. Nevertheless, I must update them on the news, unpleasant though it may be. Hmm... maybe their rage would burn more dimly when those stand users do.” One of her hooves came down on a patch of grass; when it was lifted, the verdant foliage was stained a burnt black.

Author's Note:

I'm really not satisfied with this chapter, but I had to rewrite the fight scene twice. I know this isn't the most intricate of battles, but it is their first fight; can't throw them to the sharks on their first spat, now can I? I promise future confrontations will be more engaging.

Comments

[Ultra Instinct Yamcha]

Great Chapter! I liked it and I loved the fight too! :)