Chapter 4
4
~★~
“Counter-Actuality, often mistaken as a substrate power for romantic interpolation within the original “purist” view of Anti-Satiation Actuality, only functions as a rudimentary construct for soul superposition within local magic or non-magic axioms. However this foundational principal is still experimental at best and its basis is still disputed among modern magicians and satialogians, as far as Pre-Discordian Harmonlialism is concerned. For further information on Abstract of Soul Superposition via Counter-Actuality see Spiegel Romantik cf. “Love Spell Illusory and The Commonpony’s Unnormalism” p. 512 para 2. Incredibly Imaginative, I.o.I.I.&c. by I. Incognito.”
“Sheesh, I can’t understand a word of this stuff.” said Twilight, looking up from a thick brown tome. “Spike, can you find me ‘Incredibly Imaginative.. something or other’ by ‘Incognito’?”
“Got it!” said Spike from downstairs. Twilight looked at a few other books she’d left stacked nearby. They provided somewhat helpful but imprecise information on things that were sort of similar to what Marity and Rarintosh had told her about. She sighed quietly and rubbed her hooves softly against her temples.
“Uh… Twilight? I can’t find it.” said Spike.
“Check the Borrowing List, has it been checked-out?” replied Twilight.
“Already did, it should be here.”
“…Did you sneeze on it like you did with my Astronomer’s Guide?”
“No.” said Spike, partly annoyed.
“Are you sure you weren’t looking at lowercase L again?”
“Yes.” Twilight looked away from the notes at her desk as she heard the little dragon coming up the steps to her room. Spike entered carrying two smaller books and a rather confused expression. “I found two others where it should’ve been. ‘Incredible Cross-Sections of Canterlot Castle’ and ‘Iocane Immunity: Do It Yourself’.”
“What about other books by ‘Incognito’?”
“There aren’t any others on the List. What genre is it?”
“It doesn’t say.” said Twilight, looking back at the large book. “But if what’s supposed to be in it is any indication, this is high Theoretical Magic. At least, I think so.” Twilight flipped through it, looking at the finely inscribed tiny words and complicated diagrams. “This stuff’s in an entirely different language.”
“You can read it, right?” asked Spike.
“You tell me.” replied Twilight sarcastically. “What’s an ‘Axiom of Anti-Satiation Actualism’?” she quoted. Spike stared at her, baffled.
“Exactly.” continued the unicorn. “The magic we’re dealing with is really advanced. If this is a prank, this could only be done by a pony way smarter than I am.” She slapped the book shut, stepping away from the desk.
“So what’s next?” said Spike, putting the other books down.
“We’ll see if we can get a diagnosis from Zecora. My eyes are tired from reading- the research can wait. C’mon Spike, let’s go get Big Macintosh and Rarity.”
“Who?” said Owloysius.
“Rarintosh and Big Marity.” said Spike.
“Right.” finished Twilight.
~Ω~
In the mill pond hollow, the green light filtering through the leaves of the willows overhead had faded somewhat by the gathering of clouds. Big Macintosh had decided not to talk for a time, taking notice at Rarity’s meekness and quiet. In that time, it seemed that the unicorn was more comfortable with the unsaid decision. Big Macintosh kicked another stone out of the pond, and shuffled it towards a pile he’d constructed on the shore of the pond. Rarity stood next to the rough stack of smooth brown rocks, and tried to compare its height by toeing higher on her hooves. The stallion waded back into the pond near to where he last was.
“I can’t find any more rocks.” said Macintosh, venturing back towards the buoy.
“You sure?” said Rarity. She took a curious step towards the pond.
Macintosh’s expression went wide with warning.
“Aaa yes! I’ll make sure, just don’t get that mane wet.”
Rarity stopped on the edge of the grassy pond shore, silently taking the humor of how such a minor action posed such a major threat to the other. The stallion slowly paced larger and larger circles in the pond around the orange buoy, looking down into the dark clear water. The unicorn watched him, and likewise looked down, gazing at her reflection. Her soft expression and blue eyes bore into her. ‘Rarity… I need t’think of a better word than pretty. It just don’t do.. justice.’ she thought. Her look snapped up as Macintosh budged the buoy, sounding a little splash.
“Yes, I’m sure there aren’t any more rocks.” said the stallion, looking back at the ripples he formed.
“That’s great. Apple Bloom’ll love it.” said Rarity, shrugging off the previous thought.
“And now,” said the sodden stallion, trodding out of the pond with a fine layer of silt half way up his legs. “We go to the spa.”
Rarity inhaled deeply.
“Eeyup.” she said to herself through an exhale. Rarity led the way away from the pond, taking care to step over a very large root she hadn’t noticed on the way there.
As he walked, Macintosh pressed his eyes shut and shook some of the water. He stumbled over the root for a couple of steps. In annoyance, he looked back and kicked the root, putting an enormous gash into the fibrous gray obstruction. As Rarity looked back at him, her purple mane caught the corner of her eye and she looked down at her hair again.
‘..Can you be frank to a lady about liking how they look? What if Rarity takes it like I fancy bein’ in her body? Or if I like her. Do I like her? Oh consarn it…’
“Have something to say, Rarintosh?” said Macintosh, recognizing the look of the unicorn’s consternation.
“Well… Ah was thinkin’..” said Rarity.
“Thinking what?”
She slowly turned to face Big Macintosh.
“..Ah sure look beautiful.” Rarity admitted. Macintosh thought about the compliment.
“…Thank you, Rarintosh.” he smiled. Rarity almost turned away with a little movement of her head, but stopped. She gave a timid smile.
“You’re welcome.” Rarity replied softly.
“And if I might add,” started Macintosh, straightening his height and stride. He held up his forehoof, still thinly coated with sand. “I look absolutely handsome. The mud just adds to the ruddiness, don’t you think so?”
Rarity opened her mouth to speak but a different voice spoke into the gap.
“Top of the mornin’ you two, heh.” chuckled Applejack, coming through a path that intersected the route beside the field. She was carrying a basket on her back filled with rosy pink apples, and an equally rosy smile on her face.
“Hello Applejack.” greeted Macintosh.
“Enjoyin’ a proper hard day’s work?” asked the orange pony.
“Relatively speaking.” he replied. “I’ve finished my chores and now we’re on our way to the spa.”
Applejack sniggered at his mention.
“Gk- And Ah bet you’ll chat up a storm there too.”
“What?” replied Macintosh.
“Big Mac,”
“Marity.”
“You’ve made mah brother talk more in one day than he usually does in a year.”
“I don’t see how that’s an unusual observance, Applejack.” said the stallion casually. “You know I can’t help being a socialite.”
“Not that, Ah was talkin’ about you!” she pointed at Rarity.
“Me?” said the unicorn, taken aback from the claim.
“Must be th’brain in Rarity’s head that makes her talk all the time.” continued Applejack cheerfully. “Even if you looked a different pony, Ah woulda thought Big Macintosh would only open his mouth to say ‘Eeyup’ from time t’time but you,” Applejack gestured to the both of them. “You two ‘been gabbin’ up a storm the whole time out on the field. Never though Ah’d see the day my brother would talk to anypony longer than three words.”
“I suppose that’s true.” said Macintosh ponderously.
“Betcha it can’t last forever.” said Applejack, nudging Rarity in the shoulder. Rarity frowned slightly.
“Maybe Ah’m just comin’ out of mah shell a little.” she replied.
“What’s that supposed to mean?” Applejack looked at her, turning her head with partial surprise. At no point had Macintosh ever come up with the idea that he even lived in a shell.
“..Nothin’.” said Rarity, shrinking a little. To Macintosh, Applejack eyed Rarity with that sibling-sort of look again, a curious probing sort of suspicion. Applejack looked up at him.
“..So what chores did you do? Saw you tilled the field, nice work by the way.”
“Cleared the drainage pond. Ain’t much else that couldn’t be done later.” said Rarity coolly. Applejack returned to her wide-mouthed grin as before at the mention of ‘drainage pond’, so thoroughly enjoying the viewed irony of her petite friend doing her big brother’s chores, and especially messy ones at that.
“You cleaned the runoff? Okay then.” She started along the path again. “You two have fun at the spa, but make sure you get back to normal, y’hear?”
“Eeyup.” They said simultaneously. Applejack continued away in a merry springing trot, and Rarity continued away from the forest near the edge of the field towards the gate of the farm, with Macintosh following. They didn’t walk far before Macintosh assumed they were out of the sister’s hearing.
“Drainage pond?” said Macintosh, starting to sneer at his forehoof. “You mean to say I was wading through your farm’s mucky runoff?”
“Ah cleared the drainage yesterday. Ah tell AJ that t’hide what Ah’m doin’ at the Mill Pond. It’s a surprise for her too.” said Rarity.
“Ahh…” he replied, rolling his head upward with relief. “You had me worried. Ground salts are much harder to clean than a tiny bit of sand. And they smell funny.”
“Ah could say the same thing about the perfumes Ah woke up to.”
Macintosh frowned at Rarity.
“You think my perfume smells bad?”
“Smells funny.” repeated the unicorn.
“My perfume does not smell funny.” defended the stallion.
“…If you say so.” Rarintosh knew better than to try and continue against that.
“What are they talking about? I sure hope it’s something important and romantic.” whispered a unicorn’s voice in the forest, eyeing her two subjects. Trixie quietly hobbled through the jumble of the glen beyond the road, remaining hidden. She looked back into her binoculars, focusing. A different pony came into view from the corner of her eye, and she panned her look. “Oh, here comes Twilight Sparkle. Silence, Trixie.” said Trixie to Trixie.
“Marity! Rarintosh!” called Twilight along the road.
“Twilight!” Macintosh approached. “Oh please say you have some good news. Do you have a counter-spell or something?”
“Sorry…” said Twilight, bending low. “I looked through everything I could find but nothing helped. Half of what I read was dead ends.”
“What about the other half?” said Rarity, attentive to the other unicorn.
“I found some stuff that looked sort of relevant, but it’s all Theoretical Magic. It would take a far-more researched pony than me to make sense of it. We’re going to Zecora’s. Hopefully she has some potion that can set this right.”
‘And deprive myself of going to the spa like this?’ thought Macintosh.
‘What in the name of Celestia is thought like that?! You are a mare, Rarity. You want to be back to normal.’
‘But- right. Of course. What was I thinking?’ The stallion shook his head abruptly.
“Let’s go.” he replied.
Trixie eyed them as they turned and walked faster down the dirt road away from the farm.
“‘A far-more researched pony’? Twilight flatters the Great and Powerful Trixie. Unless… no, of course this is the spell I meant to use. Everything cannot possibly go wrong.”
-Ҩ-
Beyond the edge of Ponyville, the Everfree Forest was a forbidding wall of dark vegetation and prickly things. The partially cloudy day faded into a menacing night only a few paces into the shroud cast by gaudy purplish trees overhead. Twilight, Rarity and Big Macintosh went on the pathway that ventured inside, snaking through craggy old trees and various haggard plants. Macintosh and Rarity followed Twilight, and the lavender unicorn entered the forest entirely undaunted.
“Zecora’s is just a little ways inside the forest.” said Twilight, looking through the wild space to spot the path leading on. She smiled to herself, remembering Pinkie Pie’s adage of courage against the forest, and hummed it in her mind.
“Ah haven’t been inside the Everfree Forest since Ah was just a colt.” said Rarity, marvelling at the state of the overgrown environ.
“You’re not afraid are you?” said Macintosh, following carefully behind.
“Nope.” said Rarity. She looked back. “Are you?”
“I’m not afraid because I’ve been here before with my friends. It keeps spirits up, even when this place is so garish and stark.”
“Nothin’ a little prunin’ couldn’t fix.” said Rarity, flicking a thin intruding branch away from her head with a bat of her hoof.
“But the Everfree Forest grows by itself, Rarintosh.” said Twilight, tucking part of a bush back with a wisp of magic.
“So do weeds.” replied Rarity. “The way Ah see it, this is all just a big bunch of green-space that gone an’ got itself in a tangle. A pony could do a lot, fixin’ up a forest if he really wanted to.”
“I can’t exactly imagine the Everfree Forest becoming a botanical garden.” Macintosh eyed a tree trunk with Venus-flytraps growing around it, a bug pinched between the teeth of one of the plants.
“Neither can Ah. Not yet at least. It ain’t a lost cause though.” Rarity stopped and pointed to a small patch of dark red flowers aside from the path. Macintosh raised his eyebrow at the tiny flowers, bunched together and pushed inwards by thorny vines. “Just needs a little bit of care and repair. Could pretty it up mightily.”
“Beautifying, in other words.” Macintosh said, considering the flowers.
“Not so different, if you put it that way.” said Rarity as she continued on.
The stallion stopped, a memory haunting.
‘Not so different.’
“I’m not so clear on the technical distinctions between repair and aesthetic, if that’s what you two are talking about.” Twilight said, still looking around the foliage that surrounded the path like a wide-berthed tunnel. “But I know there’s a few different spells that can modify tree shapes. That might brighten things up a little bit. Maybe we could do some magical experiments Rarity, when we have the opportunity some other… Uh… Marity?”
“Yes?” said the stallion, somewhat absent-mindedly. Twilight turned to look at her friends behind her.
“You two are staring at each other.”
Rarity and Macintosh continued walking after Twilight in unfamiliar silence. For the moment they avoided looking at each other before their views curled back and they looked at each other again, then both looked at Twilight.
“Um.. It’s.. still unusual to see myself like this.” said Macintosh.
“Eyup.” said Rarity.
“Whatever you say.” Twilight looked at them with a somewhat confused expression.
The three rounded a larger thick tree nearby a thinned out patch of stones, before the path became narrower and went over a small rise in the understudy of the forest. A vague hint of smoke came from beyond the trees, laced with some kind of herbal scent.
“Zecora’s hut is just beyond that rise over there.” said Twilight.
“Great, and then we’ll be back to normal.” said Macintosh.
“What are they doing?” hissed Trixie in a biting tone, gazing through her binoculars standing neck deep in the bushes a distance to the side of them. She twisted herself over an overgrown root that stood at neck-height, and tried to hide while sitting on top, brushing aside a few bluish flowers and a snail. “They can’t just have somepony else interfere with my plans like this. Trixie must stop them!” ‘CRACKABOOM!’ “Wait what?-”
There was a loud sound of thunder, and the trees above shuddered. Water plummeted down arriving in a wave like an intangible wet curtain, immediately making the four ponies almost invisible to each other within a volume of showering droplets.
“Oh my, what a downpour.” remarked Macintosh, looking up at the abrupt rain. Rarity looked outwards, straining to see through the occlusion of the weather.
“Twilight?” The other unicorn had seemingly vanished in the fog-like conditions. Macintosh took up at the friend’s disappearance.
“Twilight!” called the stallion.
A bright flash smartly illuminated the whole forest, and Rarity saw a unicorn’s silhouette just beyond the path. She jumped farther away, escaping into the distance.
“There, just through the mist.” pointed Rarity.
“How did she get there?” Macintosh galloped into the thicket after the other pony towards where she saw. “Twilight, slow down!”
“Marity, wait up!” Rarity called after.
The stallion stopped where he thought he saw the other unicorn amongst broad-leafed bushes, swivelling his head around in the obtrusive darkness. His was a face of growing fear.
“She’s disappeared!” he exclaimed. “Twilight! Twilight!”
“Where’s the path?” asked Rarity, catching up to the broad-standing stallion. She couldn’t see much above eye-height through the shrubbery but Macintosh could see no better. The forest with the rain hid where they came from very well, and the stallion bit his lip as his focus darted around, looking for a landmark or another pony.
“Oh dear.” he said, his voice with a tiny quiver. If his voice would accommodate, it tried to sound feminine. “Are we lost?”
“We’re only a little ways into the forest.” said Rarity calmly. “We’ll find ourselves when this rain clears; it can’t last. Not at this rate.”
The stallion calmed, looking down at his companion and their surroundings. He sighed a brief breath.
“What could’ve caused this?” he said, looking up at the canopy.
Rarintosh suddenly remembered how Applejack intended to prank Rainbow Dash. Likely the fence wouldn’t be painted that day.
“Ah think Ah might know.” said Rarity. She felt a sensation tugging and looked down, “Oh, my mane.”
“Oh horsefeathers my mane!” exclaimed Macintosh urgently, coming closer.
“Cover me.” replied Rarity, sitting down away from a tangling bush.
“Er... How?” said the stallion, trying not to worry as droplets began to render the unicorn’s hair a darker purple with moisture.
She looked up and around the space, and stopped at a thin tree overhead.
“Pull that down there. And tie it off with a root.” she pointed. Big Macintosh pulled the tree sideways into an arc, its branches forming an ad-hoc umbrella, and he tied a loose root on the forest floor to the tip of the tree, leaving it stuck arched over the white unicorn. “Spread those leaves.” said Rarity.
Macintosh pulled the branches out a little farther.
“It’s still not covering enough.” Macintosh worried as he looked.
Rarity looked around, then looked at him, and gestured beside her.
“Stand here.”
Macintosh took a stride closer, right beside and partly over Rarity, his body providing adequate cover to one side and the partial makeshift from the bent tree on the other. They sat there in the quiet white noise of the showering weather, quietly holding the moment. Macintosh adjusted himself, shuffling from the left to the right, and his foreleg nudged Rarity’s hoof. The mutual feeling of their skin against one another and the warmth contrasting the rapidly cooling air made Rarity immediately pull her hoof away in surprise. Macintosh hadn’t noticed.
“…Thank you.” said Macintosh, ending the pause. He looked down and she looked up, at each other. “It is, well, in a manner of speaking, chivalrous of you.” He gestured to the bent tree. “Vicarious, but chivalrous nonetheless, helping me keep Rarity’s mane dry.”
The quiet of the pattering rain reigned for a moment again, as the unicorn thought about a response.
“…Since Ah’m on the receivin’ end,” said Rarity, “Should Ah say thank you or yer welcome?”
They laughed as they considered the turning of the situation.
“You in your normal body would’ve done the same though, right?” asked Macintosh.
“Wouldn’t be in my right mind if Ah didn’t.”
As their glances met again, Macintosh smiled. Rarity bore a small grin with a tiny blush, and they both chuckled again. A distant thunderclap sounded, and they listened to it resonate.
“I’m glad, Rarintosh,” said the stallion. “You’re one of those ponies that genuinely cares for another’s behalf.” Macintosh raised a hoof and looked at his fetlock. “Then again, not everypony gets a chance at ‘walking in another’s shoes’ so viscerally.”
“Ah may not be a smart pony but Ah know Ah ain’t a dumb one. And anypony that don’t have half a mind to treat a lady with proper respect ain’t got a half worth havin’.”
Rarity’s comment suddenly bore a reminder to the stallion of a series of incidents at a very specific Gala with a very specific Prince who shall not be named. Macintosh winced with his stern consideration of the memory.
“Somethin’ wrong?” asked Rarity.
“Oh, it’s nothing…” said Macintosh resignedly. There was a pause, and Macintosh looked down. Rarity had a very savvy sort of disposition, if her face was anything to go by.
“What?” asked the stallion.
“Big Mac lives with three other mares. It’s never just ‘nothin’.” said Rarity, returning to look out towards the forest. She shrugged. “But Ah ain’t dumb enough to press you if you don’t want t’talk about it.”
Big Macintosh considered a response but couldn’t think of anything to say. As quickly as it started, the rain ended, drizzling back into a silence and the fog clearing away.
“Ah, the rain’s stopped.” He remarked.
“…arity! ….intosh…!” called a voice through the forest.
“Twilight?” said Macintosh, standing taller.
“Marity?” said the voice with slightly more clarity.
“Twilight over here! We’re Augh!”
Macintosh and Rarity suddenly slipped as a large bush the stallion was half-standing on gave way to an overhanging drop off, letting the two ponies slide down a small embankment onto a partial clearing in front of an ornately carved house in the base of a very swirly-looking tree. Twilight ran up and looked over the mudslid verge, at the bottom of which her two friends sat.
“There you are. Why’d you run away?” said Twilight, cautiously easing her way down the partial hill. She tried not to slip on the muddy slope, stepping on roots where she could.
“Ah followed this one.” said Rarity, poking Macintosh in the barrel. “You ran away.”
“I was following Twilight the entire time.” replied Macintosh. He turned to Twilight. “Why did you run into the bushes?”
“I stayed on the path.” said Twilight with a raised eyebrow as she walked past. The other two stood, following her.
“Then who was standing out and away from…” began the stallion.
“It doesn’t matter,” interrupted Twilight. “Come on, let’s get you two set straight.”
They rounded the tree, coming to the front of Zecora’s cottage. It was a twisted gnarly whorl-covered tree with bottles on strings that accompanied the vines hanging from every branch. Macintosh leant low to avoid bopping his head on some of the lower-hanging ones. A strange spicy something wafted through the air, completed the entire look and character of the lodgings. Rarity eyed the strange masks that led the way to the entrance, as Macintosh stared at the one mounted above the door. It perplexed him how it could ever mean ‘welcome’.
Twilight wiped her hooves on the mat and knocked twice gently, hoping patiently for Zecora’s knowledge to exceed her own, at least as far as her friends were concerned.
“On this day, who goes there?
Is it but a stallion or a mare?” a cordial accented voice came from inside.
“In short, yes.” said Macintosh through a smirk.
“Zecora, it’s Twilight. I’ve brought a couple friends, we could use your help.”
A zebra pushed the door open, greeting them with a soothing smile. She looked at Macintosh and Rarity, immediately sensing something not quite right with the two, that wasn’t readily apparent in their faces. She looked back at Twilight.
“Twilight, I’m so glad you’ve come.
What problem are you coming from?”
“Definitely not an ordinary one.” said the farm pony in a formal tone.
“Eeyup.” drawled the unicorn.
“Let me guess, before I’m sorry:
The explanation is a long story?”
Twilight perked up a little.
“Actually a similar sort of thing happened in a fiction novel by Marey Rodgers because of-”
“Twilight, can we get on with this?” interrupted Macintosh.
“Oh. Right. Sorry.” Twilight’s ears curled back a little as she sheepishly smiled.
Zecora showed Macintosh, Twilight and Rarity inside, towards a corner of her home with large puffy and ornately woven pillows. Rarity stared at the simplistic natural inside of the tree and its adornments. Zecora poured them each a cupful of tea as they explained the happenstance of their day. Her silent listening told volumes of her attentive kindness.
“…So ever since we talked with Twilight we’ve been waitin’ on her answer.” said Rarity.
“But I’m stumped.” added Twilight. “All my research led to confusing research or made-up fairy tales.”
“Sometimes truth is stranger than fiction.
But did theory lose you with diction?” said Zecora, taking a large jar of a shiny silky white substance and pouring it into the cauldron mounted in the center of the room.
“Very.” replied Twilight. “And the only book that might’ve helped is missing from my library.”
Zecora gave a small frown at Twilight before returning to gathering somethings from a shelf covered with various bottles arranged by color.
“I remember self-help once forsook,
Because you judged the cover of a book.”
“This isn’t like the poison joke, Zecora. I really don’t have it.” said Twilight, walking around to the other side of the cauldron.
“Your honest word I do trust,” replied the zebra. She looked at the stallion and other unicorn.
“But your friends’ say will be the thrust:
I may not have riddles to hide my power,
But I do have a brew that could help,”
She hoisted a seemingly impossible number of limes in one hoof and dumped them into the cauldron, giving it a stir. “But it’s sour.”
“Anything will help, Zecora.” said Macintosh, standing and looking into the pot. Rarity stood at a distance from the cauldron.
“Last time Macintosh drank a potion it didn’t end really well.” said Rarity. Macintosh gripped his chin and frowned, trying to remember.
“…Oh that’s right, you and Miss Cheerilee made a terrible mess of my shop and front lawn.”
“Good thing we got that sorted out.” said Rarity, commenting on what she thought was the far past.
“Wait!” interrupted Twilight sharply. “That was only the day before yesterday. How could you two forget already?”
The question struck both of the other ponies with surprise and Macintosh remarked with more amazement than he liked.
“..I don’t know.”
“Zecora, do you think forgetfulness is another symptom we should diagnose?” asked Twilight.
The zebra shook a fine red powder into the cauldron from a mortar and pestle.
“A blurry memory, I am not sure
If important to this problem it is, or cure.
A Back-to-Normal potion can help, or might
It’s all I believe can fix your plight.
If not, you should think of a better plan,
Perhaps a pony to solve this who can.”
“I’ve already planned for that,” said Twilight, eyeing Zecora as she individually cracked five small gray egg-like things into the colorful soup. “Hopefully we won’t have to bring it up to the Princess though.”
“But you will try, dear Zecora?” said Macintosh, putting his forehooves onto the brim of the cauldron and resting his jaw, trying to frame his face cutely against the edge. Zecora smiled with a wise sort of regard.
“Very well my good pony friends.
The Back-to-Normal potion beckons.” she said, pushing one of Macintosh’s hooves off the brim with a spoon. He stood up properly, as Rarity approached to see better and Zecora added more ingredients. She continued with a harmonious timbre.
“Fresh oak root and apple bud flower
To restore a sweet red stallion plower,
Lavender and a myrtle bunch leaf,
Unicorn and Earthen hidden beneath.”
The potion went to a deep red as the flecks of myrtle contacted the fluid, hinting towards purple.
“Oil of vanilla, saffron and wrin
To append the mare that’s held within.”
As Zecora poured the mixture of oils into the potion, it took on a reddish purple color with white sparkles in it that vaguely shone like dull sand. All in all it resembled some kind of pudding. Zecora took a ladle and poured into two finely detailed clay mugs. Macintosh and Rarity each took one, looked at it, looked at each other and looked at Zecora. Zecora and Twilight watched them expectantly.
“All is well if made correct,
It should cure what ails you yet.”
The two looked at each other again.
“Bottoms up.” said Rarity.
“Votre santé.” replied Macintosh.
Rarity took down the potion in one swig as best she could manage, and Macintosh drank his in a couple gulps. Rarity coughed once slightly, as she returned her mug to Zecora, while Macintosh held his. Their faces both puckered up, and a faint citrus aroma filled the air. There was a sudden flash of bright light all around the two ponies and a puff of smoke that disappeared in the shape of fluttering spirals in their respective colors. As the smoke cleared, the two ponies appeared clean. Big Macintosh’s legs had lost the dirt on them and hair had been dried slightly, and yoke straightened. Rarity stood there, looking partially bewildered with properly added eye shadow and a properly curled mane, as if she hadn’t been in a rainstorm in the minutes previous. The two blinked in surprise.
“They’re back to normal!” exclaimed Twilight, rushing over to the other side of the cauldron.
“So it would seem on the outside,
But did it change anything beyond their hide?” said Zecora, putting away the one mug and coming closer.
“Did it work?” said Twilight, standing near to Rarity. Rarity’s eyes opened wider, and she opened her mouth to speak, angling back slightly on her neck. “Well?”
“Ah…Atchu!” Rarity hopped with a petite sneeze.
“Twilight, I feel very masculine.” said Big Macintosh. She looked at him, not quite understanding. “This can’t be right.”
Twilight’s smile faded as Rarity spoke up.
“Aw, applebutter.” she said, looking back at her tail as she gave it a flip.
“Just as I suspected of my medication,
A soul is unaffected by the preparation.”
“Thanks anyways Zecora.” Twilight sighed resignedly. “I guess all I can do now is write to the Princess. No doubt she can solve it, but I just hope we don’t have to go all the way to Canterlot to-”
“Celestia forbid!” exclaimed the stallion. “There is no way in all of Equestria I- I mean, Rarity couldn’t possibly go to Canterlot looking like this.” He said, gesturing with his hoof widely at Rarity.
Rarity looked down at herself and back at the stallion. Then her face contorted in confusion.
“..Wait, what?”
~Ω~
Twilight led the way to the door and gestured her friends follow. The air beyond the hut was fresh and clean after the rain, and pleasing to sense after the peculiar smell within Zecora’s abode.
“Good luck my friends so mixed.
Whatever you need to have this nixed.”
“Goodbye, Zecora.” said Twilight in a tone that so-slightly hinted a defeat.
“Now what do we do?” said Rarity.
“I guess you two will just have to spend some more time until I can get Spike to send a letter for me and get a response.” said Twilight, starting towards the path.
“Then it’s off to the spa for you and I, Rarintosh.” said Macintosh eagerly, giving a not-so-tiny hop.
Twilight stopped and turned. The excitement in the stallion’s voice was very alien, considering. “…Marity,” She looked thoroughly puzzled, and spoke cautiously. “Do you like being a stallion?”
The three stood there for a moment at the realized obtuse possibility.
“…I..” started the stallion. “..Of course not.”
Twilight looked at him with a raised eyebrow, then back at Rarity, and turned to continue on the path.
“..I’ll get on with that letter. See you two later.” said Twilight, heading into the woods. The two stood there in their curious repose, before Rarity continued on again and Macintosh followed.
For a distance they walked without speaking, through the forest under the winding branches and vines that threatened Macintosh’s scruffy mane with the low-hangings over his tall head. Some leaves scraped past his head but he barely noticed, watching where he tread behind the unicorn, deep in thought. As they reached the verge of the forest that opened back into the countryside of green hills that surrounded Ponyville, Macintosh spoke up.
“Rarintosh…” he started, “Are we enjoying this?”
They walked for another oddly thoughtful moment before the unicorn responded.
“Eeyynnooii don’t know.” slurred Rarity. “Ah was worried you thought Ah thought Ah liked this.”
“There is a certain novelty to having all the strength and so on from being a stallion.” said Macintosh.
“An it’s nice bein’ pretty.” said Rarity in an imitating tone, tossing her mane. Macintosh smiled to himself, recognizing the unprofessional manner that she did it, so alike how Rarity would’ve done it at a younger age.
“It’s even more fun when ponies give you attention.” said Macintosh sweetly, then seriously. “But still, when you think about it, we can’t possible let this last. Rarity has a job and so does Big Macintosh. You can’t simply idle around the farm for who-knows-how-long teaching me how to do work, and I can’t teach you the necessary magic to perform my work tasks.”
“Speakin’ a’ which, is it the horn that’s makin’ my head tickle?” asked Rarintosh, softly touching her horn. “It’s gonna give me a mite headache.”
“Maybe you can learn magic, given time.” replied the stallion.
“It feels weird. Ah don’t like it.”
“I don’t expect you would. Even so, you’re a farm pony. I can’t imagine that you have the creative talent that would need to equal my own, were you to remain using my body.”
“Eeyup.” smiled Rarity. “Ah’d never be able to make somethin’ as magnificent as your dresses.”
“Oh you’ve seen my work?” said Macintosh picking up interest, walking in league with Rarity.
“A little, Ah guess. What Ah remember of AJ’s get-up- Ah mean dress. It was really nice.”
“Thank you Rarintosh.” said the stallion. He thought about the enthusiasm that drove the inspiration, and all the overstressed deliberations that went into Applejack’s dress oh-so long ago. And then a different thought occurred, and he wasn’t sure why it engaged him. “…‘Magnificent’,” he repeated. “Now there’s a word I haven’t heard from you before.”
Rarity avoided eye-contact.
‘Perhaps bein’ around Rarity is influencin’ me more than Ah thought…’ her mind alleged. ‘But was that bein’ creative? …Naw, ‘was just usin’ a fancy word rightly. It’s just practical.’
“..Just thought Ah’d try a fancier word.” said the unicorn. “Sayin’ everything’s ‘pretty’ just don’t cut it.”
Macintosh looked Rarity up and down as he walked.
“Oh, you’ll feel prettier still, after we’ve gone to the spa.”
Rarity’s mood suddenly vanished, and she looked forwards with an unresolved sort of estrangement. Macintosh became curious at her unexpected quiet and looked down at her. She was staring forwards.
“Rarintosh, you look nervous.”
“Ah’m fine.” said Rarity, in a very deliberate voice.
“Are you sure?” insisted Macintosh.
“Yes.”
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Chapters 4, 5 and 6 are complete, script work for 7 and 8 are ready to be typed into narrative prose.
Expect 7 and 8 before March next year.
Hooray an update! Finally!! Can't wait for more!!! :3
YES! UPDATE!
AHMERGER!!! UPDERT!!!
yay update
Update?! *takes deeeeeep breath and throws head forward in a shout*
"....yay..."
Here before Nunchucks and Regidar
ivarfjeld.files.wordpress.com/2010/06/1255890352269.jpg
Processors still doing donuts trying to keep Rarity and Big Mac straight in my head. Cannot wait to see what happens to them in the spa.
Huzzah, the update has been made!
1799250
I resent that.
Modern Germans are like three times prettier than that.
UPDATE OH YEAH!
1170044
Friendshipping, if there's still a decision to be made, or if there was a vote at all, I don't know.
POSTSCRIPT VIA EDIT: I hadn't read the comments at the time of this post.
Oh god, all of my childhood. I want this now.
1799336 Sorry, but I'm afraid three times zero is still zero.
Mayhaps you'd like to rephrase?
I'm glad im not the only one that does that
>>>“Counter-Actuality, often mistaken as a substrate power for romantic interpolation within the original “purist” view of Anti-Satiation Actuality, only functions as a rudimentary construct for soul superposition within local magic or non-magic axioms. However this foundational principal is still experimental at best and its basis is still disputed among modern magicians and satialogians....>>>
I like marmalade...
1800399 Are you sure? This is ANOTHER DIMENSION!!! It could equal H in this dimension for all we know! We might even be able to... dare I say it?... DIVIDE BY ZERO!!!
1801860 Yes? Well in that case, how do we know Germany exists? We don't, and so the entire point is moot.
1801868 Germany exists in all dimensions. Sometimes Hitler is an alchemist...
clubdeeventos.com.ar/imagenes/resultados/fullmetal-alchemist-fuhrer-bradley-i8.png
1801880 Nnnnnnooo, I don't think Hitler can exist in Equestria. And since any world with a Germany has to have a Hitler, and Hitler can't exist in Equestria, Equestria has no Germany.
This one, at any rate.
1801959 Adolf Halter... of Germaney... *IT IS DONE!!*
"Iocaine Immunity: Do It Yourself"
Shout out to The Princess Bride!
Very confusing to tell them apart
Ahahahahahaha!
Any dread pirates perusing your library, Twilight?
1801959
I meant to say that Germans are good looking and that some people should feel bad about thinking Hitler was relevant to anything.
Love it!!!!!
Finally, I found this story again. Sometimes I despise not having an account when I read stories in the past...
Regardless.
Epic story, epic author, and for the love of everything written; MOAR! 
Yay an update!
Now following, still very well done!
TWO other mares and one FILLY.