• Member Since 10th Mar, 2020
  • offline last seen 3 hours ago

Wheezyandbreezy


Comments ( 51 )

I think you skipped posting a chapter. Good story though so far.

I dont know about the opoosite of 'hotdog down a hallway' but i have always said "she'd be split like lumber"

Also i like the phrase 'like a bb in a battleship'

Yeah apparently it didn't publish chapter three. It's up now dough.

While this is awarded but a interesting beginning I can't wait to see where this goes.

Ok this has me hooked to see where this goes.

This was a wild one even if I don't ship them and I mite be a little anti ship AJ and Rarity ,I'm willing to go a little more.

Ok, so, are they anthro or full pony? And this is an awesome story. And I do love how it brings to light something a lot of couple gave to go through. Sex therapy isnt something most people would talk about so I do like that you brought that to light with this story.

-girly gasp- -claps hooves together- Finally after all these months of scribbling. Somepony says something nice about my story! -manly throat clearing- But yes they are full pony. And putting my hoof in my mouth here, but the sex therapist angle is the thinnest veiled pretext to move the story of fitting a giant cock into a tiny hole along. Thank you for reading! More soon to cum.

Well, nice to know the resort staff are all having a nice week

Oooho boiyo just you wait till the last day of their stay.

I like stories that give a pronounced focus to a big dick. In fact, my first clop stories (aside from my very first) has a lingering focus on the size of the male endowments, a trend I continue to do until this very day in fact. My only suggestion is that, because people do judge by the cover, is to tidy up the chapter titles and the long description. I.E.

An old. . . acquaintance of Rarity helps the new couple with a problem in the bedroom.

I'd also perhaps use tags to help let readers know what fetishes are within the story below a line break. For an example of what this looks like, check here. I'll keep reading this story regardless. Big fan of large endowments so you've basically already satisfied my niche.

Good Lord I've Mr Garrisoned myself. Well nothing I can do about it now. As for the long description, I unfortunately write as I speak, and that includes the "let's use the word". Thank you for the helpful critiques! Gibs! Gibs more of dat!

10364895

Gibs more of dat

Well, for one, you might want to actually reply to someone when you address what they say 😅
For other critiques, I'm actually rather baffled. Your grammar is pretty much impeccable. It's just so odd to me that the innards of your work are top-notch but the presentation of it on the outside could be improved. Using 'stream of consciousness' is good and fine for the actual content but I'd probably put a smidge of work into outlining the fetishes of the story via simple use of tags I.e. TAGS: Big Penis, anal, etcetera. Adding the story to groups will help its visibility if you want more people to know it exists. I'd also tidy up the chapter names. Some are capitalised, others aren't. Right now, you're like a master chef whose food tastes really good but people are reluctant to eat because it's not the best looking.

"OH HARDER DADDY!" But seriously, I'm TERRIBLE with names, and again putting my hoof in my mouth here buuuuut. I'm only writing this story because the story amuses me. I'm not writing a clopfic for the sake of clop. But it's a story that revolves around sex so there's no reason not to just write clop with it.

to answer the question you put forth in the snipit for the search panel thumnail
the oposite of a hotdog down a hallway is a midevile battering ram being shoved into a garden hose.

10370396
One I heard is "Cadillac in a doghouse"

10370420
that one has as much to do with the peddegree of the partisipants as the size
a cadalac was once the car of choice for the upper middle class of America.
the phrase in this case implies a tryst or afair, a well to do white colar male beding with...well...a bitch.

:eeyup: En that's how Spike...
:moustache:You sure?
:raritystarry: Spikey Spikey Spikey!
:flutterrage: Discord GET BACK HERE! I SORRY A mare has her needsLots of needs
:facehoof: And all I got is a stupid book
:pinkiehappy: I got the Cheese I got the Cheese I got the Cheese
:ajbemused: Big Mac what in tarnation's going on?
:trollestia: Bananas?
:moustache: :raritywink: Throbbing Heart was then forgotten in the pages of Twilights book in the blue section of her personal library...
:twilightoops: ?

Dan

German accents are best for giving sex and relationship tips.

And also teaching puppets to read.

What's the opposite of throwing a hot dog down a hallway?

My guess would be trying to drive a grayhound bus through a garden hose😂😂

10370470
Damn. . . That's the best I've heard so far

10369031
OOOOH THAT'S how the reply function works. Thank you!

10370427
It just refers to size on Urban Dictionary and when Jeff Foxworthy talks about Astroglide.

10370430
I am confused. . . And aroused. . . And I'm not comfortable with this fact.

10371319
:duck: I'm fashionably pregnant
:pinkiehappy: Who's the daddy
:moustache: Um me? It's a dragon thing
:twilightoops: That's biologically impossible !
:ajbemused: Dragon Lord Ember & Smolder said Dragons can get rocks pregnant, It's a dragon thing
:eeyup: I just told him to plow her field
:duck: My boutique is growing too as I'm having Hexitruplets , It's a dragon thing
:moustache: eggs or foals... we wont know till later It's a dragon thing
:twilightangry2: How'd this happen?
:applejackconfused::flutterrage::raritycry::pinkiegasp::rainbowlaugh: IT'S HIS DRAGON THING!
:moustache: What they said...
:facehoof: So much no...

10370470
Aircraft carrier in a bathtub?

Mac and Cheese

Has anyone ever shipped Big Mac with Cheese Sandwich?
Just a thought.

:eeyup: Speaking of Miss Heart I heard she got all burned up after we left the resort
:duck: We shall never speak of her again
:eeyup: Never at all, Your Spike done burned her up, Seems she did something to the little feller that he didn't take well at all. . . It was about you.
:raritystarry: My Spikey ? Spikey Wikey are you okay?
:moustache: I just gave that nasty mare what she wanted, Rarity are you ok?
:raritywink: Come Spike you deserve the best reward...But what did you do to Miss Heart?
:moustache: A Royal flush just like she wanted, A Royal screwing She messed with the dragons treasure. You know what I say. . .
:raritystarry: "Once you go dragon"
:trollestia: "The rest are just bragging" - Thank you Sir Spike she's throbbing no more...
:twilightoops: Spike broke her heart?
:duck::moustache: Damn Skippy!
:eeyup: Lucky she didn't mess with Miss Shy , Discord and all

Dan

I hope Throb-chan reconciles with Rarity and goes on to find a true special someponycreature of her own.

Maybe sequels with her teaming up with Cadance or being recruited to teach sex ed at the School of Friendship. This character has so much potential.

10387931
I here and now give you full permission to steal and use this character for any fic you would like to write. I'm only writing the rest of the story for the sake of the Applejack scenes. They amuse me so.

:eeyup: And there you have it
:trollestia: Action will be taken Mr. Apple
:duck: :moustache:
:trollestia: TH was entombed in an ash tray

Dan

Okaaaaaay..... now it got weird.

FROM
:twilightoops: MUH STACKS OF PAPERS
TO
:facehoof: SO MUCH NO... And I'm not paying for the door!

:facehoof: YEA, What the Floof was That?

10391397
It's pony porn. It started weird.

I have to say, this story is far better then I was expecting ! Sure, the beginning has some issues, some weird pacing. But the development is great, the couple is lovely, and it´s good to see a clop story a little more realistic. Not every woman is a size queen...quite different...size sometimes leads to pain. It´s nice to see someone breaking the size cliche, for once.

Still reading but, so far, thank you. And have a follower.

Poor Throb. A nympho whose job is to enhance the sex life of others, and yet she sees herself as damned to never have someone consistently there to relieve her built up tension of the job at the end of the day. Sex therapy for her must be like a day's walk in the rainforest. When all is said and done, she's hot, muggy, and thirsty as shit.

Starlight Glimmer had to be banished with all the non-con shit the O.C. did, contractual consent is the worst consent. Most of the story was fine. I will leave the up vote but that seems like a hypothetical stance to take.

10412229
I think I understand the gist of your comment but I'm not quite certain. Please elaborate.

10414699
Consent requires understanding, at what point did they understand the contract? So the therapist has dubious consent at best and fucks her patients, this is juxtaposed with Starlight and Starlight is the unredeemable one. All of this when Starlight had no real significance to the plot, and was a throwaway gag.

..... Sadly I had a difficult time enjoying the story. It was written pretty good but..... I was too curious about what Starlight did. :trixieshiftleft:

Applejack once again breathed a silent prayer to any god that would listen to please, pretty please, for Mercy's sake, just kill her now. Khorne stomped forwards, a pleading Slaanesh hanging on one arm, and a weaseling Tzeentch hanging on the other, but their protests and petitions were in vain. "SHE HAS TO DIE! SHE SAID PLEASE!!!" The blood god screamed as he raised his chain axe to strike. Right before he could plant his weight to strike however, Nurgle plopped down on the enraged lord of war.

oh fuck...why are the chaos lords here?

10576929
Because Equestria is clearly a death world.

He continued his blubbering and Applejack internally squirmed head to hoof. This was the single most uncomfortable she'd ever been in her fucking life. "Now now. There there," she said as she pat him on the back. "We'll figure th~" Her revulsion increased by an order of magnitude when she noticed her brother's still unsheathed member laying lazily on her leg. She breathed a silent prayer to any god that would listen to just kill her now. Khorne raised his chain axe to strike, but Tzeentch and Slaanesh pulled his arm back down. Slaanesh delighted too dearly in her torment, and it wasn't according to Tzeentch's plan for her to die just yet.

And where is Grandfather Nurgle in all this?

10588360
Oh don'tchu worry boyo
The plague father will make his debut.

10588509
What about Malice/Malal, Cegorach, Gork-n-Mork, Ynnead, the Star Child and the Omnisiah?

And 11 months later, their foal is born.

And rhus somewhere deep in the depths of the warp Rut, the pony chaos god of clop awakens, capable of committing such great acts of perversion to make Slaanesh blush and makes Commorragh look like a kindergarten playground.

10588746
To quote the wisdom of Decius: "He doesn't exist! Shut up about it!"

Good story keep up the good work.
And I give this a 10 of 15

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