Forget not that I am a derp.
As the former Bearers of Harmony and future Council of Friendship prepare to take the reins of the nation, something has to give. In this case, "something" is their positions at the School of Friendship.
This leaves said school's new headmare in a bit of a predicament. After all, the school now has two headponies, one counselor, and zero teachers.
At least qualifications were never a big concern.
Rated Teen for more risqué innuendo than the show could get away with.
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Heheh, nice.
Always bad when then parent moves in with the kid
At least she manages to burn all those excess calories
I'd be rather disappointed if she didn't resume touring during summer vacation
You'd think being able to do sonic rainbooms on demand would qualify
Yeah, because Gabby's too busy feeding Spike her cherries ;p
I thoroughly enjoyed this fic. I loved loved loved the 'Startrixburst' dynamic and all the perfect little details strewn in on how the system works (or, y'know, doesn't work). Also, Twilight's line "Looking back, it's a miracle we didn't run the place into the ground." made me chortle. Very fun story! Thanks for sharing!
Y'know, that retired princess stipend could do wonders to change Sunset's mind.
I'm not opposed to shipping either
That was a hilarious story, their dynamic's just spot on and Twiggles reaction was wonderful.
Now I'm just curious how Starlight's going to deal with the budgetary concerns, to put it lightly.
Oh yeah. That's some good Trixie.
I'd quote at least 20% of the story if I tried to pick highlights, so I'll just put in a thumb and a favorite. Excellent work, wonderful dynamics all around.
Anyone who actually plays Trixie in cards with a deck she produced deserves exactly what they get, nevermind letting her be the dealer.
But it would be so easy...
Anyway. To be honest with all of their busy schedules I really don't know how the Mane-6 were ever teachers in the first place, and it was the only serious problem I ever had with the School of Friendship. Pinkie Pie at least seems like she could quit her job at the bakery to be a teacher and/or continue being Pinkie Pie and do whatever she wants because she's Pinkie Pie, and Fluttershy's time is basically her own to do with as she pleases, and Twilight as she lacks any real Princess responsibilities basically has nothing BUT free time...
...but Applejack, Rainbow Dash, and Rarity? None of them should have been able to perform their jobs and be teachers at the same time. Not if they want to also sleep, anyway.
Like, normally I'm fine with suspending my disbelief, but not really when the writers are all but looking me in the eye and saying "this cannot possibly make sense, but don't let that bother you."
I definitely support this choice.
I really do love how there really is one pony for whom Fluttershy has basically no patience, and Zephyr is that pony.
I...guess? Wow, Starlight really doesn't have a whole ton of choices available, does she?
THE SHOW MUST GO ON.
See, I can't help but feel that, like with my issues with the Mane-6 taking up workloads, this is just kind of backsliding. Like, Applejack learned all the way back in Season 1 not to take on too much work at a time, and then she goes and gets herself a teaching job which any teacher will tell you is the OPPOSITE of what you should do if you don't want too much work.
And the same thing with Cheese Sandwich. He learned he has to be a free spirit wandering Equestria rather than tied to one place, but now he's just going to apparently backslide into a school position. I hear Pinkie's justification for it, but, well...
I can see it.
Ooooof course not.
This was fun. I liked it.
Love this story. It’s going into my head canon.
“And it would be wrong“ is the second reason, lol.
Yeah, I can see her reduced to squatting. Not out of necessity, of course.
Daddy Shoggoth got no love.
She’s developed the Sgt. Shultz defense against eldritch horrors, she sees NOTHING! NOTHING!
I think if you denied her access to books, she would wither and die.
This was wonderful.
Seriously though, how are they going to deal with the budget?
Clearly, Greedy Pot's special skill allows him to re-explain obvious game mechanics to ponies, even if they should already know them.
You somehow manged to completely sell me on the name Namepending Castle. It's just the right amount of stupid that it completely works. I now pretty much always refer to it by that name.
As for the School of Friendship, I have now idea how the damm thing even exists in the first place. Who paid for the construction? And there's no way the Mane 6 would have been able to juggle teaching AND their already full time jobs, at least, not without irresponsible use of time magic...
Given that this is Equestria, it could genuinely be either one... and it's the former that makes more sense.
Fanfiction of children's shows will usually make more sense than the original series because its writers actually care about making sense. Unless they don't and you end up with thirty Hs as your entire title and still have that be the sanest part. (Yes, that's a real fic.)
I understood that reference, even if it took me a couple seconds.
Aside: one of my headcanon scenes has Trixie stealing Usopp's "I used to lie a lot more" speech and then unveiling an entire battery of fireworks built into the school, which is then used to repel... well, bonus points if it's an Ursa but it doesn't really matter so long as it actually warrants that kind of force.
I like how you took time to make logical picks and work in the things we see in the last episode. Working as a Teacher does seem to fit on getting Cheese to settle down in Ponyville with Pinkie, and Autumn Blaze was a great call, getting Kirins out of isolation. As for accounting why not Silver Shill? Also yes I also think Luna would keep Dream walking while Tia went almost full retirement, speaking engagements on occasion.
"OH NO SHE DIDN'T!"
Scuttle Loom was approaching her late sixties, and yet it was only Sweepy Belle's supreme earth pony strength, remarkable grip on her tail, and some incredible anchoring that kept her from charging into the headmare's office, slapping Starlight silly, and punching her into next week (literally, thanks to a time travel spell). And she was still digging at the floor strong enough to leave gouges in the crystal with her bare hooves.
"DOES SHE HAVE ANY IDEA HOW HARD IT IS TO HAUL AN ENTIRE LOOM ACROSS EQUESTRIA?!" roared Scuttle. Her voice hadn't diminished in the slightest in her old age. "IT HAS DIRT IN PLACES YOU WOULDN'T BELIEVE! I ONLY DID IT AT PRINCESS TWILIGHT'S REQUEST! I AM GOING TO KILL THAT STOT!"
"Fcuvvuh, yuh muh tuh cuh duh," opined Sweepy around the tail in her mouth.
"AND THEN I'M GOING TO LEARN NECROMANCY SO I CAN BRING HER BACK TO LIFE SO I CAN KILL HER AGAIN! AND AGAIN! AND AGAIN!" Scuttle's horn buzzed like a swarm of angry hornets and light bent around it in peculiar ways.
"Upuu'u, Uh muh suh huh," said Sweepy.
"Yes, some angry rants aren't worth watching," said the Greek god. A small fraction of divine power, and Scuttle's strength and magic left her. She slumped limply to the ground as her horn winked out. She was still vocal, unfortunately.
"I'm not a foal! I'm more than twice as old as her! I was going to teach Loyalty!" Scuttle screeched. "And she turns me down because of a clerical error she can check with her eyes! You think I brought that loom here for fun?! I had a perfect metaphor of how threads reinforce each other, and- I AM GOING TO LEARN PLANESWALKING! I AM GOING TO LEARN PLANESWALKING SO-"
"Scuttle, we're all disappointed," said Sweepy. "That doesn't mean murder is the answer."
"-I CAN GO TO ANOTHER DIMENSION AND SUMMON HER THERE AND-"
"She's gone past murder," said Apollo. "And if she must overreact, I approve; problem-solving via murder is so banal and cliche."
"-LEAVE HER TRAPPED THERE FOREVER!" Scuttle banged her hooves on the ground one last time, panting heavily.
"Scuttle, Apollo came here from another world after Princess Twilight jumped through all sorts of hoops to get him, and you don't see him complaining about being called a foal."
"I might've come to this realm anyway," admitted Apollo. "My father's powers are largely good for shapeshifting bestiality. You can imagine the awkwardness when he brings home his latest one-night stand. Every day. For centuries."
Sweepy tilted her head, her ears twitching like gears were pushing them. "...Not really, no."
Scuttle and Apollo both inched away from Sweepy.
"I mean, really," Sweepy said with a shrug, "if-"
"Perhaps we should go inside anyway?" Apollo said hastily. He pointed at the door. "Perhaps our letters simply got lost in the post."
"No," snapped Scuttle. Still lying on the ground, she pointed angrily at the door. "I am not going to work for somepony who can't even double-check her applicants. Did she learn her managerial skills from a sunblasted blender?"
"Very well," said Apollo. "I can understand that sentiment, at least. Then shall we find something to do? This is quite the lovely little town."
"I saw a bakery on the way in," said Sweepy. "Let's get cupcakes." She leaned over to look Scuttle in the eye. "You wanna get some cupcakes?"
Scuttle sighed and stared at the ceiling. If looks could kill, the school would've been a radioactive wasteland by now. Then she said, "Yeah."
Charming. We need to see more Trixie-Rainbow competitiveness.
You know how things work, Celly. Either pitch in with the rent or you get pitched out.
Still a hilarious story nonetheless. I love Starlight's reaction at the end of everything. It seemed entirely appropriate
Harsh. It's totally fair to criticize them over priorities, or maybe calling them irresponsible parents (even if I personally think it's debatable). But this makes them sound like they're lazing around like teenagers and Zephyr Breeze, or are distracted by bright objects like children and Pinkie Pie.
I'm not sure how to feel about the group marriage idea. I can definitely see the dynamic between Starlight and Trixie, or Starlight and Sunburst (myself being a believer of much more the former). But even though I see Trixie and Sunburst as friends, I don't see that kind of desire between them. And although I'm not a counselor or any kind of expert, isn't the idea of a group marriage loving each other, and not just having a common link with one person? That seems
closer to a harem for an anime protagonist. I actually regret making that joke, I don't think anything you've written comes anywhere close to being as bad as a harem anime/light novel. I just thought the polyamourous angle to their relationship came out of the blue.Not sure if risque fashion or if Trixie brought a clop magazine to Rarity's shop. That sounds like BDSM monthly.
That's a healthy attitude towards marriage.
Considering that I don't think the Royal Guard have any material explosives that doesn't take much... I wonder if she got Tempest on board for it.
Tempest for gym teacher?
9953584
“Tackling Up” is hoofball, what you’re thinking of is a letter off with “Tacking Up.”
A nice bit of silly fun in answer to one of the many outstanding questions left by the finale. Still, this got me thinking as to what Discord actually could do for a career, and I think I have the perfect idea: Game Design. He has the imagination and the experience, both IRL and in O&O, presumably. And roguelikes are very popular these days. What's more chaotic than an entire world that scrambles itself every time the player fails?
9953603
yeah, I missed the l in that when I read it.
Back in the first scene I wondered who was flirting with who and suspected the answer was ‘yes’... and then we end in confirmation that they’re not only already together but engaged. It’s a great dynamic, I want more of it.
Though personally I go Starmaudtrix. I wonder what it is about Starlight that draws poly shipping.
I always love when Applejack’s childhood in Manehattan comes up. There’s a lot of potential there that normally gets ignored.
Discord, you don’t get permission to use casual menace until everyone is mostly sure you won’t casually cause a disaster. Not doing it out of malice doesn’t count for this purpose.
Trixies casual seething jealousy of Applejack and Rarity’s contacts is hilarious.
I LOVE Pinkies bit there. Good on Trixie for keeping the mood. I thought for a moment Pinkie was channeling eldritch powers of absolute night for purposes of dramatic lighting.
Only being MOSTLY sure the fedora-wearing pony was Pinkie... in her spying on everyone back in the villain days did she stumble on the secret of the continuing mirror clone?
Celestia bumming on Sunset’s couch is SUCH a thing that should happen. Does Principal Celestia know her dopple is in town?
9953472
It’s a perennial problem.
Yup. That's definitely how Celestia would spend most of her retirement.
Oh come now Glim-Glam, you're already channeling Twilight's neurosis and Pinkie's crazy. It's like a third of the Elements never left.
PrincessCelestia, not only are you squatting, eating Sunset's food and using up her valuable air, you're also interrupting her cuddle time with her favorite purple, glasses-wearing snuggle pillow. Its not like there are separate rooms in her loft to keep you from hearing them when they're having "late night study sessions".Its true. You just don't tempt addict with their vice like that.
That's the problem with applying nth dimensional math that incorporates zorth axis cartography into your building's architecture.
Awww, its okay Glim-Glam. Just let the madness take hold. You'll find you life is much easier if you just give in.
Well, you had me cackling like a mad-being with this. Thanks for the morning pick-me-up.
Delightful!
Behold! The premise for a sequel!
9953682
Unfortunately, the next story is locked in as Ditzy Doo's Adventures in Bablovia. Because you need a spectacle for the big one-oh-oh.
Wrong Red-Black faction, Harold.
Quiet, Opera.
Tagging 9953617 because I'm pretty sure they'd appreciate the joke.
This was a hoot! I'd never considered that the others might retire from their professor positions alongside Twilight—with the Council of Friendship only meeting once a moon, it's not like it was a major addition to their schedules. Still, I understand the rationale, and it made for a really fun premise!
Not only was it hilarious throughout, but having a bit of a trip down Memory Lane was also nice. Just seeing all of those characters' names again as they discussed their replacements brought me the best kind of nostalgia. You did great with this one! Thank you so much.
Actual footage of Trixie playing Blackjack with Sunburst.
Also, our own school with blackjack and snooker needs to be remembered.
And Trixie likes her STALLIONS naive and helpless before her... again, the perennial problem of wanting to quote the entire story.
Why didn't I ever think of StarTrixBurst? It's just so perfect...
Well, I hope the school goes well for all involved. This sounds like a wonderful group.
"Please let this be a normal field trip," Gallus pleaded.
"With the Cheese?" Smolder replied.
"No way!" the classroom chorused.
COMICS! COMICSCOMICSCOMICS *cough*
Anyway, this was a good read and a look at the future. Notably heavily headcanon heavy, but you know, that's just what you do.
There were a lot of things I wanted to comment on, but uh, only the above thing actually prompted me to jump, hit quote, and jump down here. All the others kept piling up until I forgot half of them.
Strange, how this feels almost, like the show when I read it, but then there's a thing here and there that tells me its clearly not. Hmm...
...Nah, I don't have time to try to make something like this show-style...
-GM, master of hiccups.
Hopefully, being able to talk to other Kirin has gotten Autumn Blaze to mellow out a little. Otherwise, it's going to be quite a pain for the students to try and take notes on whatever she's talking about.
Also, I both dread and look forward to what will happen when something makes her go nirik.
So many fun details, as is typical of your works. I especially liked Pinkie's "your way probably works better when no one's watching". Good job addressing a conundrum that has yet to be explored much in fanfic so far (at least that I've seen).
9953739
There is nothing about this story of which I do not approve. Sure hope Starlight can figure something out for the whole payroll issue. Great job as always.
I’m surprised Star Swirl wasn’t brought up. He went on a big personal quest to understand friendship and the finale shows he succeeded when he contributed to the Ultimate Rainbow Of Doom.
...Thou hath no taste, mare. Nothing beats a mare with a nice pair of beautiful wings.
...Though coupling the wings with a horn does nothing to detract from their beauty... Luna is proof of that much...
Surely Celestia’s been on the job long enough to have a pension. Or perhaps currency exchange still hasn’t been worked out.
And that's how Little Cheese was conceived
What no Daring Do? Now she's no longer adventuring and apparently the writing gigs gone south she should be able to teach geography, history and literature.
As soon as Starlight gets the school running right.. instant Alicorn. Cause I definitely think it's an ascension worthy deed.
Trixie to a T, all right.
*choking ferret noises intensify*
But just how many of her predictions are in any way accurate?
Yeah, keep telling yourself that, Trix...
...thus far I've only commented on things pertaining directly to Trixie...darn it, Trixie, stop upstaging the others!
This I will not argue. I mean, it was great to even get to meet her parents at all, but that episode really wasn't doing them many favors on the quality of their parenting skills.
Not even gonna be subtle about it. Okay then.
9953491
Ask Twilight for a raise. A big one.
9953739 9953965
Having been a die-hard Magic School Bus fan back as a kid, I approve of both of these comments.
This was very fun to read! I must admit the ship at the end was... surprising (I prefer boring, two-partner heterosexual ships myself), but getting there was a treat! You got the character voices and personalities down perfectly, and their banter was a great deal of fun to read. I also liked the ponies you picked as substitute teachers--had almost like a "next gen" vibe to it.
Now you have me questioning my own writing a little, trying to figure out how to make the prose, not just the scenario, interesting!
9954194
There are two different heterosexual ships in a mixed-gender threesome, so you're in the clear!
(Trollestia is there because the obvious center of the threesome is not the member of the outnumbered gender)
9953739
Cruisin' on down Mane street you're relaxed and feelin good!...
9954235
Amended my previous comment for clarity.
I just find certain relationships to be a little more difficult to read than others, though I try really hard to be supportive. Chalking it up to personal failings.
9954174
Professor of Cruel and Unusual Geography...
Unlike Prof. Jones she won't be bored in her civilian life. It is, after all, Ponyville.
Delightful. As several others have said before me.
And you caught me in a quoting mood, with an eminently quotable fic... oh dear...
She's been working on remembering the "it would be wrong" part. It still doesn't occur first, but it's at least made it onto the list now.
I was going to quote the Sunset moment here, but so many people already have that there's nothing left to say...
I laughed out loud at this and quoted it to my wife, who also deemed it fantastic. Trixie is on top form in loads of places here
That is a magnificent Discordism.
While the new teachers that Starlight found are a great set, part of me really wants to see the version where Starlight takes Pinkie up on this offer.
9954245
At least you understand that it is a failing, and not How Things Should Be. Too many people pick the latter and enforce it with literal murder (and then aren't convicted because the "justice" system is run by people who agree).
9953419
She'll certainly be able to when the school isn't in the middle of a regime change.
Clearly Dash needs to go so fast that she clips through reality and ends up in the Astral Plane by accident. Twilight may or may not have already composed a song for if/when that happens.
Gabby and Gilda's argument during the Blue Moon Festival may well have been over whether there's anything in Griffonstone actually worth saving, or if they should just abandon the ruin and start over elsewhere. Like Ponyville.
9953443 9953574 9953633
I'm thrilled to see how many people got such a kick out of a joke I added at the last minute. I was worried that the cutaway gag wouldn't work well; very glad to see I was mistaken there.
9953471
A magician has to know what's really here if she's going to direct the audience's attention away from it.
9953478
Agreed. I've made it work in several of my stories via time shenanigans, but the logistics involved are just absurd.
Nor does Rarity. As she said, her social circle is cripplingly overspecialized. If her contacts aren't locked in the trend cycle, then they're deep in politics. Thank goodness "Filli Vanilli" gave her some kind of hobby.
Several points:
1. One of the big reasons why he suffered in the laugh factory was because he couldn't see the fruits of his labor for himself. Not an issue with face-to-face teaching.
2. Pinkie outright says she has ulterior motives for the pick. (And after all, Starlight didn't ask for the best choice, she asked for Pinkie's personal preference.) Ponk is using this as an excuse to reel in her horsebando, and she's doesn't care who knows.
3. No one said this would last. Cheese might love teaching, or he might skip town in less than a semester and only stop in Ponyville a few times a year as he resumes his nomadic existence... for a while. Because...
4. We know that at some point between now and Luster Dawn getting sent to the Ponyville Friendship Reeducation Facility, Cheese does settle down long enough to help raise Li'l Cheese. Hopefully. So yeah, that backslide has to happen at some point to avert a time paradox... assuming these two don't just party their way out of the conventional time-space continuum.
No one tell Trixie she's an alicorn in Good King Sombra's world. Especially not that she's the Princess of Humility.
Glad you enjoyed it!
9954290
Possibly also in at least one other world if the Nightmare Knights comics are to be believed.
Great and Powerful Twilight: "Princess Trixie?"
Trixie: "I'm choosing to ignore that!"
9953480
At least it's on the list.
And I say one good banishment deserves another!
Books and friends. She could get by with just one, but without either, why even live?
9953497
Greedy considered it part of the patter. Those who didn't know how to play actually listened, those who did let it wash over them as background noise.
Always glad when I can influence someone's headcanon.
And irresponsible use of time magic was half of why Starlight was a member of the School of Friendship faculty in the first place.
9953528
As long as Phyllis doesn't describe herself as a "mean green mother from outer space," we should be fine.
I understood that reference and I sincerely wish I didn't.
9953541
Silver Shill certainly could work as a way to salvage the School's financial situation. Of course, the question is where he's been all this time. I doubt he's just been living on his sibling's couch for years, even if his niece and her friend Diamond Tiara like him.
9953542
Magnificent. Absolutely going into Never the Final Word this weekend. Thank you for it! (And poor, poor Scuttle Loom. She's getting too old for these horse apples.)
9953581
Replace "bright objects" with "exotic animals" and you've hit the nail on the head. The two of them are good people, but their prioritization is a bit skewed, to say nothing of their sense of empathy and their capacity to recognize Scootaloo as a person and not just a piece of luggage Lofty and Holiday have looked after.
As for the Suntrix issue, their bond definitely has shades beyond friendship, though that's largely physical at the moment. No one said the whole marriage was going to last, but they're certainly willing to give it a try.
9953584
Pretty sure Twilight called first dibs to get her to revamp the Royal Guard. That could take a while...
9953617
Just so long as he doesn't set up microtransactions in the future. Just 0.03% of your sanity for all the cosmetics you can think of! ... For this character.
9953626
There are so many good options! Having to pick just one borders on impossible. Though Maud's already taken.
The fact that the Mane Six have direct connections to most of Equestria's entertainment industry is rich with possibilities. Especially possibilities that drive Trixie up the wall.
It is Pinkie we're talking about. Not outside the realm of possibility.
The idea was that most identifying marks were covered by the outfit. I'm pretty sure Starlight would've recruited Manehattan Pinkie had she encountered her.
She will when I drive this nag to her front door!
"It's like she never left... and I'm not sure if that's a good thing."
Sorry. I get testy when somepony eats an entire bag of baby carrots in one sitting.
9953647
Given that I'm writing this, that's probably true.