I'm a simple writer. I write whatever I feel like at the moment and I don't stick to any one genre very much. I just want to entertain with my work.
A little trip to Canterlot is the kind of relaxation Thunderlane needs. One little incident introduces him to a guard that leads to a friendship and awkward feelings on the part of the small town pegasus. What do you do when you don't know what this feeling is? And why can't he stop staring at the guard's clothes?
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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Awwwwwwww, non-cloppy M/M shipping, and nicely written to boot? Always nice to see. Confession at the end seemed a bit rushed and sappy, though.
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Thanks for reading and bothering to comment. While I'm fine with sap, I completely agree with you about how rushed it feels. I would have liked to draw it out a bit but I've got too much stuff to concentrate on. Maybe I can rewrite the ending in the future. Fun fact, it was supposed to be a clopfic but the characters made me write it a certain way when they saw where it was going.
Such a cute story :)
Oh, and I like Silk. Such a cool talent she has
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She probably likes to sit at a cafe and stare at ponies, guessing their orientations. "Gay, Gay, Straight, Gay for pay, Asexual."
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"Gay for pay"
Man, I just love the way you write. While I agree that the confession and resolution did seem rushed, the overall buildup and character chemistry you had between Grey and Thunderlane was really well written. It was an interesting choice when you changed the viewpoint from Thunderlane to Grey at the dance club. While, we finally get to confirm a lot about Grey (orientation and the like), I feel it revealed so much that a lot of the suspension and mystery around Grey was lost. I can see why you did it though, because Thunderlane at that point was way too oblivious to the situation Grey's thoughts would be more interesting to write, and showing Grey's thoughts in contrast to Thunderlane's actions brought a comedic note to the story. To be honest, I'm kinda glad you didn't turn it into a clopfic. One, I'm not all that into crossdressing, and Two, the characters themselves seem so reserved intimately, that having them sex it out so soon after meeting would seem out of character, especially with Thunderlane's reaction when he realizes his true feelings.
Overall, great story, writing, pacing, characterization, etc. Glad to see your still writing and can't wait for the next one. A sequel perhaps? A lot of your fics seem open ended enough for one~
1086160
Thanks a lot for the in-depth comment!
I think one of my problems is I get towards the end and I dash for the finish line (the end). I'm going to work on that and when I can find the time I'll see what I can do. I'd like this to have turned out better for the people that took their precious time to read my work, like yourself.
A second chapter might be in order, with a slightly changed ending to this fic. Thanks for the constructive criticism.
Read this story kind of the other day, but might've skipped over some parts or rushed through some. Just read it again and... wow. For a m/m pony romance (not too many of those, due to the show's using of mostly female ponies and people going with that), this was VERY well-written. Especially with a one-time appearance pony! For the time being, anyways.
Thunderlane's obliviousness and actions with Grey Skies were, I think for me, the most interesting to read as it was all cast in a new light when he DID find out about Grey's preference, and made him start to question himself, like myself a few years back when I questioned what kind of person I wanted in a mate, sort of. Though yeah, maybe the ending like others said was a bit rushed possibly, I know it had ended properly after all the buildup and questions that Thunderlane had in his mind. And though I'd like to maybe see more, there's no pressure, especially if'd feel forced or that I'm not familiar with many of your works (only one I've read before with way I read nowadays or before rather, was the JELI 88.1 one, long before made an account or could even access it, for some reason). But this is the kind of fic I like to see, one with a story that's quite well-written! Well done!
Okay dude, you and M/M fics are a friggin sweet combo.
Now I'm a huge sap and is very very partial to M/M ships in pretty much any fandom, but it made me d'aww in all the right places.
I do agree with some of the others that the ending felt slightly rushed but that's also the only issue I got.
Enjoy dat thumb up.
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I think I'm going to work on the ending again, change it up. When I have the time. Some of my stories wouldn't even get published if people didn't remind me to fix things. I appreciate the compliments!
A lovely story. I was a little concerned about the crossdressing, but I think you handled it very well. I also think you developed Silk very well.
Great job.
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Concerned? I'm not the type that would treat a fetish or interest disrespectfully, don't worry. And Silk was fun. Like the well meaning big sister who knew more about you than you wanted her to.
This was really good! I think you handled everything in a masterful way.
Great, great story. Very sweet, emotional, and well-paced. "Horribly credible" made me laugh in sympathy with Thunderlane. Thanks for posting!
Very nice and sweet