With no warning, Equestria finds itself in the middle of a crisis the likes of which it has never seen. Overnight, all four princesses have disappeared! That's real messed up!
Shining Armor has gone through these sorts of emergencies before, though. But with his wife and sister missing, he's not willing to sit on the sidelines and let Twilight's friends save the day without him. As circumstances begin piling up, Shining Armor finds himself in the middle of a plot that can only be solved by a few very talented secondary characters.
Unfortunately, Blueblood is one of them.
Neighsay proving to be as competent as always I see. XD
Okay, you have my interest.
I think Fancy Pants is the mayor of Canterlot.
Uh.......What was that last part about a giant evil oyster?
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A giant evil oyster tried to take over Equestria.
I'm pretty sure it happened in one of the EU novels, or in the MLP FPS game.
Pretty sure.
Are we SURE Neighsay isn't a Dracula?
I...actually feel sorry for Neighsay for a change? Wow.
Why IS Thorax here? Poor guy.
This is very funny. Look forward to seeing how this continues to blow up.
This right here convinced me faving this story was a really good idea.
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That was very well done.
Ok wow, this story is amazingly funny. I love it.
Under. Rated.
Eh.
This is turning too meta and too much Fourth-Wall-Breaking for me to get invested. Honestly, it should be tagged Random.
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Fourth wall breaking? I'm not sure what you mean. Where does the fourth wall get broken?
As for random, you're probably right that I should tag it as that. This isn't really much of an adventure, really.
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A background character noted for being so uninvolved that they don't even have a name. Or perhaps I misread and it means Shining Armor doesn't know his name.
The narration, which is self-referential, as opposed to anything any of the characters have said.
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Ah, okay, I see what you mean.
Oy! Three weeks?!
So, do they need to check the ocean?
Alright, our first suspects!
If it wasn't for fanfic I'm pretty sure no one would remember Diamond Dogs existed.
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Not true. It was one of Bowie's most well-known albums.
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[slide whistle]
......Blueblood you moron.....
I'm not even kidding, this almost freaking killed me.
Blueblood! You bolthead!
Better see that definition in the next edition, Merriam-Webster.
Don't forget your miner helmet and ice cream scooper, Shining.
Well, that could've been worse.
Crystal Clear's predecessor, for example, had a habit of giving misleading reports. Like claiming to be married when she was clearly single.
It left many ponies wondering why Miss Information lied so much.
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The EIEIO has never had very good luck with its spymasters.
No kidding, I almost died of laughter reading this chapter. You are incredibly witty, friend. The rapidly escalating silliness of the acronyms is what did it. Also the escalating silliness of the entire story.
This story is perfect.
You're not the only one, Shining. Also that is probably the best reaction to getting kidnapped I have ever seen put to paper. Screen? You know what I mean.
The time she got tangled up in vines...
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The other time she got abducted by the bug lady...
Canterlot!
Canterlot!
Canterlot!
...
Actually, on second thought, Canterlot is a very silly place.
The Plot Thickens- Wait, that's just the slime.
Season 9.63 continues...
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I think this season makes a strong arguement for being the best one yet...!
Wait, hold up.
Did Thorax just turn into a literal mouthbreather?
This story.............................
Do they truly have the right to mock prince BB's intelligence if it took them that long to check if the door was locked? I forget the correct use of the word myself but that seems to be the correct use of irony in that situation.
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In all fairness, when someone throws you in a cage you just kind of take for granted that they're going to lock it. I don't think any of them really expected the gazelles to be dumb enough to use a cage without locking the door.
So, really, they should have been insulting the gazelles' intelligence instead of Blueblood's.
Showerbathtub thoughts.So Garth is a cat-bird that likes to snooze? He's gotta have a good meal.
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He may or may not like pushing yellow diamond dogs off cliffs.
I'm surprised Yona didn't say she hated water.
Well, you know what they say. The Hague is a ☠☠☠☠ing joke.
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I mean, if the only thing stopping you from committing war crimes is going to trial, I would argue you have other things to worry about.
*has done thirty years of panto*
Sans Smirk, I think that-
...
...
...
No, on reflection, it's a fair cop.
I worry that the story may have just peaked. Where else is there to go?
So.
The moment Dusty [1]walked into the Abbatoir of Funk, my brain instantly supplied backing music in the form of That One Song by the Bee Gees That They Always Play and didn't stop. Leading me to the conclusion that all of the songs at the disco were in fact, That One Song by the Bee Gees,
(Would that be here the Gee Gees...?
...
...
I'm so sorry, everyone.)
In the context of this story, that would actually make a lot of sense.
[1]It wasn't until half paragraph later the reality of What You Had Done There with Draft (how long had you planned that?!) hit me.
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The entire reason he was named Draft was so I could set up this joke.
I've peaked as a writer.
The sense of humor in this story is so stupid and i love it.
I would just like to say, while I normally appreciate this story, I particularly appreicated this story this particular morning.
*tips helmet*