An Innocent Glow:A School Raze Rewrite

by CozyGlow57

Chapter 1:The Magic Starts Vanishing

At the School of Friendship,Starlight Glimmer and Rainbow Dash entered Twilight's Office...

" We have an emergency! " Starlight said.

" The students dropped out of the sky ! " Rainbow exclaimed .

"W-What ? Are they okay ? " Cozy Glow asked , concerned for her fellow students safety .

" Slow down " Twilight said " What happened ? "

" I cast a spell for our field trip to Cloudsdale " Starlight said " But my spell just failed ! "

" We barely caught them in time " Rainbow Dash exclaimed .

"But you caught them , right Proffesor Rainbow Dash ? " Cozy asked , still concerned about her classmates .

" Of course we did " Rainbow said. This seemed to satisfy Cozy's worries about her classmates safety .

" I'm glad you're all okay , but I'm sure it's nothing to worry about , Starlight " Twilight said " Maybe you did your spell wrong. Let's take a look . "

Twilight tries to take a book from a shelf but it drops to the ground .

" I didn't drop that book " Twilight said .

" Maybe you did your spell wrong " Starlight said , sarcastically, obviously bothered by Twilight's comment from earlier .

Then they hear a thud from outside .

" Ow ! " Rarity exclaimed .

The door opens and Fluttershy and Rarity come in .

" Rarity ran into the door " Fluttershy said .

" Proffesor Rarity ,are you okay ? " Cozy Glow asked .

" No ! My magic is go-o-one ! " Rarity said , sobbing " I even had to use my hooves to coil my tail ! "

" Still think there's nothing to worry about ? " Rainbow Dash asked Twilight .

" That that doesn't make any sense " Twilight said " Magic can't just disappear . Something has to be causing this . "

" Um ,didn't we learn in class about a creature that eats magic ? Ter,Tee….Tir- something ? " Cozy Glow said .

Fluttershy gasped " Tirek ! "

" Isn't he trapped in Tartarus ? " Rainbow Dash asked .

The door opens and Spike runs in , gagging . Cozy sends him a concerned look while Rarity helps him get the letter out .

" Spike , what's wrong ? " Twilight asked .

" Thanks , Rarity . I've never had a letter get stuck before . " Spike said " It's from Princess Celestia ! We've all been called to an emergency meeting in Canterlot ! Look ! "

Twilight tries to levitate the scroll but her spell fails .

" I'm pretty sure I know what it is about " Twilight said .

Later , In Canterlot

" Throughout our city, ponies have been reporting tales of their magic failing . " Princess Celestia said " Spells going wrong . Potions not working . "

" Even raising the moon has become difficult . Are there similar troubles in Ponyville ? " Princess Luna asked Twilight .

" Yes . We experienced it first hoof . " Twilight replied.

" It's the same in my kingdom . " Princess Cadance said " The Crystal Heart seems safe for now , but I worry if this continues . "

Then the door opened and a mail pony came in with a letter .

" Letter for the princess from Star Swirl the Bearded ! " The mail pony said .

"Ah ! It is even more terrible than we feared ! " Princess Celestia exclaimed " Magic is disappearing all across Equestria ! "

The ponies gasped .

" Star Swirl believes the power will drain from our land in three days . " Princess Celestia said " First , unicorn magic and spells will fail . "

" That's what's happening now ! " Starlight exclaimed .

" On the second day,creatures will lose their magical abilities " Princess Celestia continued .

Fluttershy gasped . " Oh no ! "

" But why is this happening now ? " Princess Cadance asked .

" That's the worst part " Princess Luna said " We have no idea "

" Has anypony checked on Tirek ? " Twilight asked .

" You mean the big, red, scary centaur who eats magic ? " Pinkie Pie asked her " Why would we wa— Ohhhh . Riiiiight . "

" If he has found some way to escape his prison or work from within it, he could be responsible for this " Princess Celestia said.

" That is the best explanation so far . " Princess Luna said " Somepony should investigate "

" We'll go . " Twilight said .

" Oh, no-no-no-no-no-no . " Rarity said " Not without us , you wo— Wait . Did you say "we" ? "

" I've finally learned that it's okay to count on your friends for help . " Twilight said " Um , you do want to come , right ? "

" Uh, duh ! " Rainbow Dash exclaimed .

" Thank you all . " Princess Celestia said " We will search for ways to protect Equestria in your absence . "

" Be careful . Tartarus has changed since you were there ." Princess Luna said " It now holds many dangerous creatures, and you won't be able to rely on your magic . "

" With her friends by her side , she won't have to . " Applejack said .

Author's Note:

I know this chapter was canon compliant for the most part but I promise starting from the next chapter this story will diverge from canon massively.

Comments

[Crimson Prose]

No way. Anyone THAT cute has to be up to something.

More seriously, this is a good concept but you really need to put more detail into things. Otherwise it's just an alternate recap.

[CozyGlow57]

9715360
Thanks! Don't worry there will be more details in other chapters!

[Dxinsider]

Oooo I can't wait to see what happens next.

[The Blue EM2]

Colour me interested.

[Mica]

It's readable, but it needs proofreading.

I am interested to see how this develops. As much as the scene of Rarity running into a door still cracks me up ...I think it would have been better to just give a brief summary of the beginning of School Raze, and then go straight into the part where it "diverges from canon." I feel there really isn't a need to take up a whole chapter just repeating what happened in the episode.

[Yosh-E-O]

I give you credit for how closely you are following the canon. That, to me, is very difficult as, in any of my writing, I find myself taking far too many liberties.

Your patience and attention to detail are very good.

Also, no surprise, your spelling errors are getting fewer. You're developing well and will only continue to do so.

[Mist_Chaser]

Pretty sure she was the student also stealing lesson plans obtained from Starlight Glimmer's office and selling them to Flim and Flam so they had something to teach at Friendship University...

Even if she hadn't been guilty of high treason, she would have still been guilty of educational corporate espionage...