• Published 1st Jul 2019
  • 1,569 Views, 40 Comments

You Betcha! - The Cloptimist



Torque Wrench does a favor for Kerfuffle in her hour of need. Not that it means they're friends or anything. Just a little engineering project, don'tcha know.

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A Good Turn from Torque Wrench

"Celestia dang it, why didn't he call me over? I could have had a looksee, made it safe while I knocked together somethin' new for him, if only he'd up an' asked! I got all the lumber right there in my yard, y'know!"

"It wasn't his fault," said Kerfuffle, quietly. "I didn't even see it was broken. I just wanted to take a look in the orchard... I figured, y'know, if anywhere had the color I was lookin' for, it might be one of those lovely big fruit trees? An' the next thing I know the sky's spinnin', and then whoa!... bang! Crack! An' whaddaya know, I'm on my back in a pile of busted wood. Quite a fall, I tell ya!"

"It was his fault," snarled Torque Wrench. "He put the danged thing up in the first place. Weren't any kinda call for him to be doin' a thing like that. And now you're facin' a stretch of months in the hospital while you just lie around in bed and wait for that leg to heal up, all because a grumpy old pony couldn't keep his grumpy old spite fence in good order."

"I'm sure it's not gonna be too long," said Kerfuffle, and there was a moment of silence while the two of them pretended that was true.

"...Anyhoo," said Torque, stiffly, changing the subject as she shook herself out of her reverie. "I was only callin' by to say I'm all but finished with fixin' up yer old display case. I was gonna drop it round to the shop when you were around, but when I came to ask, you weren't to be found, and they told me about yer little spill. I'm guessin' I can just go ahead and hold on to that for the time bein', yah?"

"...You can hold on to it," said Kerfuffle. "I wondered if maybe, if I got the display case back up and all, then maybe more ponies might come and have a look at all my stuff, even though..."

She trailed off, and then gestured around the gray, muted room with a foreleg.

"Yeah," said Torque. "Maybe."

"We can save it for the grand re-opening, once I'm outta here, right?" said Kerfuffle, with a half-smile.

"Sure," said Torque, looking intently at the biggest oil stain on her overalls. "Once you're outta here."


"Can I see her?"

The nurse looked surprised. "...Why?"

"...Because I wanna see her," repeated Torque.

"I don't know that she'll be wantin' any visitors," said the nurse. "It's a pretty bad beat all told, dont'cha know."

"Have ya tried askin' her at all maybe?" said Torque, shaking her head.

"It's just, well, nowadays, if somepony gets sick or hurt, there's not much call for visitors any more," said the nurse, looking confused. "I don't remember how things ever got to the way it was before, with all the soup and cuddles and whatnot, but right now other than those two kids with their flyin' an' their tendency to, y'know, crash all the time, I can't recall anypony askin' to see another pony in here just for the sake of doin' it."

"I'm askin'," growled Torque, and the nurse gave a shrug and trotted out from behind the desk, pushing open a heavy gray door and gesturing for Torque to accompany her down the nondescript corridor of the little doctor's office.

"It's so gray here," muttered Torque, as she looked around. "I keep on gettin' to thinkin', dang it, if only the mayor had left the generator well alone! Or if he'd got it into his head to have asked me to just take a looksee at it, sure I don't know if I mighta helped but I know this place wouldn't be so very depressin' as it is now!"

"Oh, um..." said the nurse, shyly, "see now, the thing is, well, this room was actually always gray, so, um, it wouldn't have made any difference..."


"You're lookin' good, though, sure enough," said Torque, trying hard not to look at the uneven shape under the blankets, and trying even harder not to look like she was trying not to look. "And the nurse said they'll be lettin' you out once they're sure it's all healed up nice."

"It's not so bad, I reckon," said Kerfuffle, with a painful shrug as she sat up in bed. "I guess I can still fly, ya know? It's lucky I'm a pegasus, and not..."

The silence descended heavily on the room, and Kerfuffle involuntarily twitched her wings, awkwardly, watching Torque as the earth pony pawed at the ground.

"I guess," said Torque, flatly, looking at the floor.

"I just mean... There are worse things," said Kerfuffle, trying to smile.

The glass of water on her gray bedside table glowed and transformed into glorious full color. Nopony noticed.

"...Anyhoo," said Torque, absent-mindedly tightening the strap of her overalls with a tug of her mouth. "When they let ya out, I need ya to swing by the workshop, yah?"

"To collect the display case?" asked Kerfuffle. "Because I don't know how soon I'll be opening up again, truth be told."

"No," said Torque, turning to leave. "Not for that."


Kerfuffle peered into the gloom of the workshop as she slowly made her way through the doorway. Torque looked up from her workbench, watching Kerfuffle walking upright on her one hind leg, propped up by a makeshift pair of crutches, plain steel poles with austere black cushioning to help support her under her forelegs, flapping her wings for balance.

"Nurse said I should try walking on my leg," said Kerfuffle, answering Torque's unasked question. "Said it wasn't so good for me if I just fly everywhere."

"You'll be glad to know I fixed up ol' Moody Root's rotted old fence," said Torque, apparently ignoring what Kerfuffle said. "Not outta the goodness of my own heart or nothing like that. Mean ol' pony was just complainin' to everypony else about how now there was a big hole in his fence and anypony could just walk in and steal his fruit and blah blah blah, and eventually I got so sick of him flappin' his gums I headed on over there and kicked the rest of it down and built him up a nice borin' sturdy fence that ain't so likely to fall down on anypony. He never asked about you at all, by the way."

"Now hold on there, Torque," interrupted Kerfuffle, "I know that ain't true, he sent me - "

"...An' then I went around just tellin' everypony else who put up one of these stupid fences that I'd be glad to do the job right instead of their own incompetent selves tryin' and makin' a pig's ear of it. As if the town didn't look bad enough already without ponies who don't know the first danged thing about what they're doin' puttin' up fences that look just awful and when I wouldn't trust 'em to stay up in a strong breeze, never mind with somepony climbin' up on 'em like a danged fool, but sure, what do I know about fixin' things..."

Torque shook her head, and then realized she was ranting, and looked up at Kerfuffle, who was looking back fearfully at her.

"Yeah, yeah, sure and I know it, who wants to listen to the repair pony, huh?"

"I do", said Kerfuffle, softly, shifting her weight on her crutches. "I believe in you, Torque."

The magic of hope suffused and transformed her crutches... but even though the steel was brighter and more reflective than ever before, it had nothing to reflect but gray.

Torque rolled her eyes. "Sure, whatever, I didn't ask you to heave your rump over here so you could blow smoke up my chimney. I asked because I wanted to give you this."

She dragged a long wooden case out from behind a pile of junk, and Kerfuffle cocked her head in confusion. The case was gray, obviously, but it was clean, and neat, sanded smooth... it looked like it might even have been painted, or at least varnished, to look smarter than all the other oil-stained bits and pieces lying around Torque's workshop.

"Now it's not like I ever had call to do anythin' like this before, so don't go expectin' miracles out of it," said Torque, speaking around the latch as she popped the case open with her teeth. "But I had a bunch of parts lying around that I couldn't find a use for, so... yeah."

Kerfuffle's eyes went wide as she looked at what was in the case.

"It's..." she started to say, her eyes filling with tears.

"Now, hey, hey, don't go gettin' soft on me," said Torque, waving her hoof dismissively. "It ain't nothin' special, but I figured nopony else was gonna step up an' do it. An' like I said, I had all this stuff lyin' around anyway."

"...Thank you," said Kerfuffle, and leaned forward precariously to hug her, but Torque waved her away and took a step back, looking out the window with determination.

"It's an engineerin' challenge, not a birthday present," she said, as Kerfuffle looked at the prosthetic leg. "I checked it over with the nurse. If you come across any problems with it, usin' it day to day an' such... call me over before you get hurt again, you hear?"

She turned to look at Kerfuffle. "Uh, 'cause it's still kinda what you'd call a prototype, and I reckon I might be able to sell a few of these if yours works okay," she added, hurriedly. "Only reason I'm not chargin' you for it is because you're kinda testin' it out for me, dont'cha know."

"...Mmhm, oh, yah, sure," Kerfuffle nodded in agreement, adopting the same matter-of-fact tone... but Torque could see her smile was still just as big as before.

"So, uh, you just go on back to your place, and try it out - it adjusts just there, ya see? - an' get on back to your, uh, sewin', or sketchin', or whatever it is you do. Could even maybe, I dunno, pretty it up a little, if it's too plain for ya... just don't make it too heavy, now, and for sure don't block that hinge there, or these springs, okay? They gotta be able to move, or the whole thing just won't work..."

Torque paused for a moment, looking over her handiwork with a strange expression on her face, before gently shutting the case lid. "...Now, if ya don't mind, I got real work to be gettin' on with here, so..."

"...I'll get out of your mane, then," said Kerfuffle, picking up the case with her mouth and hoisting it onto her back, awkwardly positioning herself for takeoff.

"Hey, Torque?" she added, as an afterthought, but the repair pony had already gone back to her workbench, hammer in hoof, mouth full of nails.

"...Thanks," she whispered, and flew out of the door.

Torque looked up after her, and waited until she was sure Kerfuffle was safely out of sight. "Don't mention it, ya clumsy doofus," she muttered, and picked up her hammer again.

On the wasteland behind the workshop, a single butterfly landed on a tiny, scruffy patch of green grass.


Author's Note:

I absolutely loved Kerfuffle, and more specifically I was super proud of the fact that her having a prosthetic leg wasn't some kind of plot point, or indeed even mentioned, just presented as completely unremarkable. That's the show I love, right there.

So I hope this doesn't seem like I'm trying to fill in a gap that didn't need filling, and it's definitely not my intention to make any kind of statement at all about the life experiences of amputees; more that I thought it was an interesting idea to bring together my two favourites among the many excellent new characters from the special. And I can never resist sharing a bit of headcanon; as with Red/Yellow I know there are bound to be a ton of different theories and stories people have for Kerfuffle's past. This one just happens to be mine, that's all.

Comments ( 40 )

Nice bit of slice of life for the fandoms two newest waifus.

9707997
Thanks very much! I'm surprised to apparently be first (and I thought someone might have already written a Petunia Petals story by now!)

This definitely deserves more attention than it has. Well done.

9708391
Thank you very much! All feedback is always appreciated, but especially when it's on a story that seems to have gotten off to a rather slow start!

I could hazard some guesses as to why this seems to have fallen through the cracks a bit views-wise - if you've not seen the special and don't want to be spoilered you'll stay away, if you've not seen it but don't care about spoilers this is basically two OCs, and since that one downvote (at the time of writing) came within literal seconds of the story being cleared for publication I'm guessing some people just don't like the idea of a (SFW) Rainbow Roadtrip story at all? - but in terms of the actual story, the vote ratio is nice, the comments have been nice, and a lot of people seem to have added it to their favourites, so I'm happy enough.

The character tags for Kerfuffle and Torque only got approved after a couple of hours, I'm guessing more people might find it and check it out in the coming days and weeks once they've had a chance to watch or rewatch the special, at which point I just hope they like it!

Congrats on writing the first Kerfuffle Fic on the site.

9709467
Thanks. The first of many, I hope! Though hopefully when she gets more stories, they'll do better than mine has :twilightsheepish:

(Posted this as a reply to a comment on The 24th Pegasus' own excellent Kerfuffle & Torque story I Remember Red, where the commenter said they found Kerfuffle and her prosthetic leg "distracting", and I thought I should probably post it here for my own readers as well!)

...I didn't find it distracting at all, I found it really inspiring to see such a warm, positive, upbeat portrayal of a character with a prosthetic limb. Like with Scootaloo's aunts, I thought it was entirely the right way to do it - no big speeches or clunky shoehorning or Very Special Episode guff, just an absolutely matter-of-fact presentation: "people like this exist, it's not a big deal or even worth noting, let's get on with the story."

I knew as soon as she appeared that a bunch of fics would happen speculating on what happened with her leg, but that's just the nature of fanfiction when presented with something both intriguing and unexplained - I'm pretty sure neither 24th Pegasus nor me, nor any of the future authors who will surely write great Kerfuffle stories, was looking to fill a gap that didn't need filling with our headcanons here. She's just a great character and I hope there'll be lots more stories with her in the future!

You know? This was a very nice read and I wouldn't mind seeing another. :twilightsmile:

9710912
Thank you for saying so!

Dan

Reminder that very few Whinneysotan's EVER say "Youbetcha" or "dontcha'know" unless being facetious. That's more of a UP thing.

9716972
In the special itself, I'm assuming it was heavily exaggerated as a kind of shorthand, to avoid having anypony explicitly mention whereabouts the town was meant to be, rather than an attempt to carefully and accurately mimic any real-world dialect. Both Mayor Sunny Skies and Kerfuffle manage to work in "dont'cha know" a couple of times in the half hour we see them.

(The overuse of) "You betcha" - in this context, a quote from the Mayor - to signify LOOK WE MINNESOTA NOW to outsiders like me comes from Fargo, which I'm pretty sure both Rainbow Roadtrip and the Whinnyapolis pony from Princess Spike are either riffing on or using as a reference. Just be glad I didn't call this story Stack My Pancakes!

This was a nice, enjoyable little read. Almost obligatory when you think about it. It makes sense that Torque was the one who helped Kerfuffle maintain her prosthetic leg, and making it in the first place isn't that far of a stretch either. :pinkiesmile:

The little bits of color appearing and no one noticing was a nice touch, as that wouldn't necessarily have been exclusive to after the Mane 6 arrived. 🌈

I did feel you were taking liberty with Moody Root's character though, as even though he seemed a bit grumpy and reclusive in the special, he warmed pretty quickly, and didn't appear to me like somepony who would be unsympathetic if somepony was hurt on his property. 🤔

I was also a bit surprised that Kerfuffle's face fell when Torque told her the prosthetic was just free because she was letting her try it as a prototype, and that she might produce more of them to sell later. 💰 I doubt there are any more amputees in Hope Hollow, and it seems a little unlikely that Torque would be able to advertise selling/making prosthetics elsewhere - at least not easily - so I kinda just expected Kerfuffle to give her a knowing smirk, understanding that Torque was just putting up a front to hide her soft center. :unsuresweetie:

"...sure I don't know if I mighta helped but I know this place wouldn't be so very depressin' as it is now!"

"Oh, um..." said the nurse, shyly, "see now, the thing is, well, this room was actually always gray, so, um, it wouldn't have made any difference..."

That was funny. :pinkiehappy: In a subdued, unexpected chuckle sort of way, but certainly funny. :trixieshiftright:

I liked this story, and I'm honesty intrigued at the possibility of you writing more about Hope Hollow's residents in the future. I'd especially like to see how you'd portray Petunia Petals. Thanks so much for sharing! :twilightsmile:

9718657
Thank you very much!

Hmm, oh... that was absolutely what I was going for, that this is obviously Torque just doing a nice thing and the prototype thing is a transparent front Kerfuffle sees through straight away. Kerfuffle's disappointment was meant to be because Torque is still feeling so hopeless that she feels she has to keep up her gruff facade, not because she believes Torque's cover story. I'll try and rewrite that part to make it more obvious.

As for Moody, and wanting to read more of my Hope Hollow Headcanon Horsewords (thank you, BTW!)... Watch this space!

Hmm, can a simple wooden fence that falls down on a mare really cause such an injury that an entire leg would be lost? This doesn't feel like it's enough to cause such a severe injury.
The plot with Torque Wrench helping Kerfuffle contradicts what Sunny Skies said, a little, I wonder what inspired you to it. But I love how you have Barley and Pickle as the only ones who still visit a sick pony in hospital! Foals, always having a much bigger heart than adults have. :heart:

9716972

But that's not Minnesota in the special, is it? It's Hope Hollow, a town located in Equestria, so things are differently there than here on Earth. It's not supposed to mimic Minnesotan culture, so there's no reason to be offended by the portrayal.

Oh, this is absolutely perfect. This is the kind of story I love. Cute and heartwarming, reads exactly like an episode. And the dialogue is fantastic.

9762459
Thank you so much!
I was working on a sequel of sorts but got a bit bogged down with Real Life... Should be ready soon. I hope.

PresentPerfect
Author Interviewer

Oh my god I love these ponies so much. :D

9774608
They are so good! I wish G5 could just be this.
(And thank you for the favourite!)

Brilliant work. Returning color to neutral or transparent objects was an especially nice touch. And Torque going full tsundere was downright adorable. Thank you for this.

9779671
Aw, thank you so much! I don't know why this is getting so much love all of a sudden but I'm so happy to see everypony enjoying it, it's one of my favourite things I've written!

Hello, Equestria Daily people! Hope you enjoyed the story! :twilightsmile:

Wow, awesome read; you did an excellent job of tying them together. Fantastic interactions!

A cute little story (by which I mean the length). I can definitely see this being if not a full length episode perhaps one of those shorts that they made in between the seasons. I actually wish that Kerfuffle was introduced earlier in the show, or had more appearances because there was a certain je ne sais quoi about her beyond her prosthetic that elevates her above a stock one-shot character... although if I am completely honest the mystery of her prosthetic is a good part of her uniqueness. I just hope that the show writers had her as some token appearance to satisfy executive pressure.

Had to read this don't cha know. Your portrayal of the characters is spot on (and your use of upper midwest dialect is quite good too..yah hey dere!) Well done!

10642706
Thank you! In the excitement over Away this week I'm glad people are still finding this story too after PaulAsaran's kind review (above) - I've always liked this one among the things I've written. Glad you enjoyed it! :twilightsmile:

I like this

10963999
Thank you for saying so! :twilightsmile:

10964007
You're welcome

This was a great little story to provide some character background missing from the special. And the tie in with the small flashes of color was perfect.

11292440
Thank you very much for the kind words, I'm really glad you enjoyed the story!

I was thinking about how restoring the rainbow might work in a realistic setting rather than a flat color cartoon, and how surely there would have been some little sparks of hope here and there before the Mane 6 arrived to light a full on conflagration, and it all kind of stemmed from there.

I found this story by accident and did not regret it. It was very nicely and pleasant to read. Thanks to the author!

11339731
Thank you! I'm happy you enjoyed it. :twilightsmile:

Kerfuffle has such a wonderful spirit. And she has such style! This was a really sweet fic. Torque is all sorts of salty sweet and Iove her for it.

11356734
I'm pleased you enjoyed her portrayal here, I tried hard to stay true to her character from the special. Glad you liked the story!

Very well written, especially regarding their accents! :)

Lovely little backstory for the two. Fits them neatly.

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