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shortskirtsandexplosions
Joined September 2011
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shortskirtsandexplosions
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Joined September 2011
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38w, 14hTwilight's Library
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Image: http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-MbMInE_5tqE/Tihq8rAtu2I/AAAAAAAAA_4/rl_tnwsoEe8/s1600/somuchpony.gif
*Do not read this*
One particular quirk of my personality is that no matter what, if I see a story that I'm even remotely interested in, I can hardly resist reading it- and completing it with all possible speed without missing any details. It feels like some sort of hunger for fiction that can not be sated. And thus, I shall read this... When I get through all the rest of what seems to be the results of the coming of the L-Day that I haven't heard much about (although this is probably my own fault)
Image: https://i.chzbgr.com/completestore/12/8/30/Doc6vikJM0CIcygu_8IQJg2.jpgI don't know what just happened... but I think I get it? Maybe?
My head hurts, this was really good, kind of out there, is meta the right word? The only thing is you lost me for a while at the point Bonbon cuts off Lyra's head and wears it like a helmet, I know she is kind of being tortured in tartarus or something but I don't know, how can you go back and see your lovers face and hug them with the knowledge that minutes before you did that to said face... even if I don't know, the Bonbons and lyras were kind of mixed up at the end and confusion and discord and what and..... DAMN IT ALL my brain hurts...
... As i read this I kept coming up with 'one does not simply' jokes...
Image: http://thefunnyplanet.com/pictures/5734.jpg
');My mind just got fucked. Mind fucked for surejavascript:smilie('
Incredible. Brilliant. And soooo sad. Dammit, SS&E. And now my head's all tripped out and the world feels weird just from having followed all of that to the last twist and BAD END 
Out of all them stories, THIS one liked and faved. And to think I thought maybe it was some prank on that manga Bobobo-bo Bo-bobo?
And this deserves a TRAGEDY tag- though if you feel it gives the game away, all right. But 'random' is misleading.
The only thing I can say for certain is that you have an excellent command of dream imagery, no matter how regrettably based in internally-consistent real-world-like logic the dream world you have described seems to be. I particularly liked the part where the oak trees were grinding together at the center of the cube. Otherwise this was entirely confusing and mismatched.
from the agony of your last failing struggle to reach the reality of your beloved...
Wow, dude, you just blew my mind away. My mind is probably in Serbia by now, you blew it so hard. This was sad, though. Really, really sad. It's also a mind-buck, but still sad. It made me confused, and I had no freaking idea what was happening until the end, but then you confused us more and threw in a big ol' 
.
So to summarize, well-done.
Confuzzledly,
~Plyxe
I done read a thing. The thing done broke my brain.
Brain initiating manual reboot...
...
...
Ahem. So, in summary, brilliant stuff as usual
Image: http://dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Twilight_crazy.png
Reading this was a bloody experience. It quite honestly reminded me of the exposition sequence in Brave New World, but it is much longer and particularly fun to read; it is ultimately touching and a fairly astute insight into the surreality of dreaming.
I literally finished it in five minutes; the damned thing hits like a bomb. It is smashingly good, I must say; even the awkward dialogue is justified for this story.
.... I request that this be given a sad tag.... Lyra no....
This is the first story I've seen here that made me wish that it were possible to both like and dislike a story at the same time. Having read it, I am no longer certain your description was reverse psychology. Nonetheless, an interesting story; a mad beat propels it. That, and Bon Bon being in Lyra's head in more ways than one…a masterful tragedy in far fewer words than your norm.
YOUR MIND WHEN WRITING THIS=DISCORD+PINKIE PIE *times* THE MASK *divided* BY ZERO TO THE POWER OF 15751512658758/97843165749845
5 OUT OF % CRAZIES FOR WHAT"S HIS FACE!
WHAT ASYLUM WERE YOU IN WHEN THIS CAME INTO YOUR SHITSTORM HURRICANE OF A MIND?
HOW DID THIS HAPPEN?
i'm going insane now. bye bye.........
Well. That was odd. I liked the immune system part a lot though.
Poor lyra...
Image: http://dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Lyra_cry.png
Image: http://www.atypicallyrelevant.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/05/FamilyGuyStewie-Straight-Jacket.gif
Is it weird if I get it? 'Cause I think I get it.
*********SPOILERS!!!!!****************
Lyra is in a coma.
She dreams she is Bon Bon because she hears Bon Bon's voice talking about the music etc (she talks about Lyra being the one who's musical).
The drums are the heart rate monitor/Lyra's heart.
The 'they aren't going to wait much longer' or something thing is Bon Bon telling Lyra to wake up; the doctors are going to turn off the life support.
Lyra then wakes up from being Bon Bon and sees her mare/girlfriend there beside her, but she's too late, and the hospital decides to pull the plug.
The title's origin, though I guessed it from the beginning, was still intriguing.
*****SPOILERS******
Overall, worth reading.
(Very SPOILERY)
Really enjoyed it, but I didn't see that final twist coming at all. I'd been hoping that she was going to live. What a way to get our hopes up...
Still, this was very well-written. Got a little too abstract to be comprehensible at points, and some of the repetitions didn't make sense, but the feelings are all there. The back-and-forth between "Bon Bon" and the constantly-repeated phrases were terrific.
Regardless, I get the feeling you had a lot of fun writing this. 
...Woah.
The way you portrayed the confusion and panic as she was slowly piecing things together worked really well, I thought. Familiar things from the first sequence crumbling and twisting around her. That ending... I definitely didn't expect it. You could say that it really pulls on your heart strings 
But really though, this one got me. Tragic.
Image: http://zs1.smbc-comics.com/comics/20111207after.gif
...What the buck did I just read?!
So, Bon Bon was in a coma, but it was Lyra in the coma, but then she died, and Bon Bon fades away into nothingness? Wat?!?!?!?!?! 
...I did like the many powerful undertones suggesting a feeling of helplessness, though. I thought they were very well done. I would expect nothing less from you, Skirts. 
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