Bamboozle boogaloo 2: Tokyo drift

by Theboxcatgamr

chapter 5: Goku was my favourite DC villain

Author's Note:

Like diamonds mutilation is forever and is a girls best friend

wait I don’t think I said that right... eh still kinda true. Leave it in

Noah was being escorted through the halls of a very clean building. Compared to the previous location he was in this was literally Spotless. Noah fiddled around with the strange chain wrapping his hand and Loki had taken to falling asleep after everything. Noah was carrying Loki piggyback style and daring was waiting in the infirmary for the leader of the mercenaries to wake up. Loki was muttering something in his sleep and he rested his head on Noah’s shoulder. Noah wondered how old Loki was. 10? 13? He hadn’t had a clue.

Noah had passed a few statues of griffins in many different positions, some holding spears, some stood atop a creature, some with heads held high and others low. An almost illegible description and name written on each one.

”lines and squiggles...wait.”

It was actually very fine cursive writing instead of some strange alien language. A few statues down there were much older statues. It was obvious that an effort to keep the stone from succumbing to time was made. The statues got smaller and smaller as Noah went along and eventually it lead to a small griffin almost the size of Loki with a massive slab of reading material. It read:

𝓔𝓸𝓷𝓼 𝓪𝓰𝓸 𝔀𝓮 𝔀𝓮𝓻𝓮 𝓫𝓾𝓽 𝓼𝓲𝓶𝓹𝓵𝓮 𝓬𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓽𝓾𝓻𝓮𝓼 𝓸𝓯 𝓵𝓮𝓲𝓼𝓾𝓻𝓮. 𝓦𝓮 𝓯𝓸𝓾𝓷𝓭 𝓱𝓸𝓶𝓮𝓼 𝓽𝓱𝓪𝓽 𝔀𝓸𝓾𝓵𝓭 𝓽𝓪𝓴𝓮 𝓾𝓼 𝓲𝓷 𝓪𝓷𝓭 𝔀𝓸𝓾𝓵𝓭 𝓯𝓮𝓮𝓭 𝓾𝓼 𝓪𝓷𝓭 𝓲𝓷 𝓻𝓮𝓽𝓾𝓻𝓷 𝔀𝓮 𝔀𝓸𝓾𝓵𝓭 𝓹𝓻𝓸𝓿𝓲𝓭𝓮 𝓬𝓸𝓶𝓯𝓸𝓻𝓽 𝓪𝓷𝓭 𝓬𝓸𝓶𝓹𝓪𝓷𝔂. 𝓞𝓷𝓮 𝓭𝓪𝔂 𝓪𝓵𝓵 𝓸𝓯 𝓽𝓱𝓪𝓽 𝓬𝓱𝓪𝓷𝓰𝓮𝓭. 𝓞𝓾𝓻 𝓵𝓮𝓪𝓭𝓮𝓻𝓼 𝔀𝓮𝓻𝓮 𝔀𝓲𝓹𝓮𝓭 𝓸𝓾𝓽 𝓲𝓷 𝓪 𝓶𝓪𝓼𝓼𝓲𝓿𝓮 𝔀𝓪𝓿𝓮 𝓸𝓯 𝓭𝓲𝓼𝓮𝓪𝓼𝓮. 𝓢𝓸𝓶𝓮 𝓸𝓯 𝓽𝓱𝓮 𝓼𝓶𝓪𝓻𝓽𝓮𝓼𝓽 𝓶𝓲𝓷𝓭𝓼 𝓽𝓱𝓮𝔂 𝓱𝓪𝓭 𝓭𝓮𝓬𝓲𝓭𝓮𝓭 𝓽𝓱𝓪𝓽 𝓽𝓱𝓮𝔂 𝔀𝓸𝓾𝓵𝓭 𝓵𝓲𝓿𝓮 𝓸𝓷 𝓲𝓷 𝓼𝓹𝓲𝓻𝓲𝓽. 𝓘𝓷 𝓸𝓻𝓭𝓮𝓻 𝓯𝓸𝓻 𝓽𝓱𝓮𝓶 𝓽𝓸 𝓼𝓾𝓻𝓿𝓲𝓿𝓮 𝓽𝓱𝓮𝔂 𝓷𝓮𝓮𝓭𝓮𝓭 𝓪 𝓿𝓸𝓵𝓾𝓷𝓽𝓮𝓮𝓻 𝓽𝓸 𝓬𝓪𝓻𝓻𝔂 𝓽𝓱𝓮𝓲𝓻 𝓫𝓵𝓸𝓸𝓭 𝓸𝓷 𝓮𝓿𝓮𝓷 𝓽𝓱𝓻𝓸𝓾𝓰𝓱 𝓽𝓱𝓮𝓲𝓻 𝓲𝓷𝓮𝓿𝓲𝓽𝓪𝓫𝓵𝓮 𝓭𝓮𝓶𝓲𝓼𝓮. 𝓦𝓮 𝓰𝓵𝓪𝓭𝓵𝔂 𝓼𝓽𝓮𝓹𝓹𝓮𝓭 𝓾𝓹 𝓪𝓵𝓸𝓷𝓰 𝓼𝓲𝓭𝓮 𝓶𝓪𝓷𝔂 𝓸𝓽𝓱𝓮𝓻 𝓬𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓽𝓾𝓻𝓮𝓼 𝓸𝓯 𝓪𝓵𝓵 𝓼𝓱𝓪𝓹𝓮𝓼 𝓪𝓷𝓭 𝓼𝓲𝔃𝓮𝓼. 𝓣𝓱𝓮𝔂 𝓱𝓪𝓭 𝓰𝓲𝓿𝓮𝓷 𝓪𝓵𝓵 𝓸𝓯 𝓾𝓼 𝓰𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓽 𝓰𝓲𝓯𝓽𝓼 𝓽𝓱𝓪𝓽 𝔀𝓸𝓾𝓵𝓭 𝓰𝓲𝓿𝓮 𝓾𝓼 𝓪𝓵𝓵 𝓪 𝓯𝓲𝓰𝓱𝓽𝓲𝓷𝓰 𝓬𝓱𝓪𝓷𝓬𝓮 𝓲𝓷 𝓽𝓱𝓮 𝓷𝓮𝔀 𝔀𝓸𝓻𝓵𝓭 𝓽𝓱𝓪𝓽 𝔀𝓸𝓾𝓵𝓭 𝓯𝓸𝓵𝓵𝓸𝔀 𝓽𝓱𝓮 “𝓬𝓸𝓷𝓿𝓮𝓻𝓰𝓮𝓷𝓬𝓮”

𝓣𝓱𝓮𝓲𝓻 𝓾𝓷𝓭𝔂𝓲𝓷𝓰 𝔀𝓲𝓵𝓵 𝓯𝓸𝓻 𝓻𝓮𝓼𝓲𝓵𝓲𝓮𝓷𝓬𝔂 𝓲𝓷 𝓽𝓱𝓮 𝓷𝓮𝔀 𝓪𝓰𝓮,

𝓣𝓱𝓮𝓲𝓻 𝔀𝓱𝓲𝓽 𝓪𝓷𝓭 𝓱𝓾𝓶𝓸𝓾𝓻 𝓯𝓸𝓻 𝓪 𝓬𝓱𝓪𝓷𝓬𝓮 𝓽𝓸 𝓯𝓮𝓮𝓵 𝓱𝓪𝓹𝓹𝔂 𝓪𝓷𝓭 𝓵𝓲𝓰𝓱𝓽𝓮𝓷 𝓪𝓷𝔂 𝓶𝓸𝓸𝓭 𝓪𝓷𝓭 𝓶𝓪𝓴𝓮 𝓪𝓵𝓵𝓲𝓮𝓼 𝔀𝓲𝓽𝓱 𝓮𝓪𝓼𝓮 𝓽𝓸 𝓽𝓱𝓸𝓼𝓮 𝓪𝓵𝓲𝓰𝓷𝓮𝓭,

𝓣𝓱𝓮𝓲𝓻 𝓻𝓮𝓼𝓽𝓵𝓮𝓼𝓼 𝓯𝓲𝓰𝓱𝓽𝓲𝓷𝓰 𝓼𝓹𝓲𝓻𝓲𝓽 𝓽𝓸 𝓼𝓮𝓮 𝓾𝓼 𝓽𝓱𝓻𝓸𝓾𝓰𝓱 𝓽𝓱𝓮 𝓪𝓰𝓮𝓼 𝓸𝓯 𝓭𝓮𝓼𝓹𝓪𝓲𝓻 𝓪𝓷𝓭 𝓱𝓪𝓻𝓭𝓼𝓱𝓲𝓹𝓼,

𝓣𝓱𝓮𝓲𝓻 𝓲𝓷𝓽𝓮𝓵𝓵𝓲𝓰𝓮𝓷𝓬𝓮 𝓪𝓷𝓭 𝓪𝓫𝓲𝓵𝓲𝓽𝔂 𝓽𝓸 𝓶𝓪𝓴𝓮 𝓶𝓲𝓼𝓽𝓪𝓴𝓮𝓼. 𝓝𝓸𝓽 𝓽𝓸 𝓯𝓪𝓲𝓵. 𝓑𝓾𝓽 𝓽𝓸 𝓵𝓮𝓪𝓻𝓷.

𝓐𝓷𝓭 𝓯𝓲𝓷𝓪𝓵𝓵𝔂 𝓽𝓱𝓮𝓲𝓻 𝓱𝓸𝓹𝓮 𝓪𝓷𝓭 𝓪𝓫𝓲𝓵𝓲𝓽𝔂 𝓽𝓸 𝓻𝓮𝓬𝓸𝓿𝓮𝓻 𝓯𝓻𝓸𝓶 𝓽𝓻𝓪𝓰𝓮𝓭𝔂. 𝓤𝓷𝓯𝓸𝓻𝓽𝓾𝓷𝓪𝓽𝓮𝓵𝔂 𝓽𝓱𝓲𝓼 𝓰𝓲𝓯𝓽 𝔀𝓪𝓼 𝓷𝓸𝓽 𝓪𝓼 𝓹𝓸𝓽𝓮𝓷𝓽 𝓪𝓼 𝓽𝓱𝓮 𝓸𝓽𝓱𝓮𝓻𝓼. 𝓣𝓱𝓮𝔂 𝔀𝓮𝓻𝓮 𝔀𝓮𝓪𝓴 𝓪𝓷𝓭 𝓽𝓱𝓪𝓽 𝓲𝓼 𝔀𝓱𝓪𝓽 𝓶𝓪𝓭𝓮 𝓽𝓱𝓲𝓼 𝓽𝓻𝓪𝓲𝓽 𝓼𝓸 𝓼𝓽𝓻𝓸𝓷𝓰 𝓯𝓸𝓻 𝓱𝓾𝓶𝓪𝓷𝓼. 𝓓𝓾𝓮 𝓽𝓸 𝓸𝓾𝓻 𝓷𝓪𝓽𝓾𝓻𝓮 𝓪𝓷𝓭 𝓫𝓸𝓭𝔂’𝓼 𝔀𝓮 𝓱𝓪𝓿𝓮 𝓵𝓲𝓽𝓽𝓵𝓮 𝓵𝓸𝓼𝓼 𝓲𝓷 𝓯𝓲𝓰𝓱𝓽𝓼 𝓪𝓷𝓭 𝓷𝓸 𝔀𝓪𝔂 𝓽𝓸 𝓵𝓮𝓽 𝓽𝓱𝓲𝓼 𝓽𝓻𝓪𝓲𝓽 𝓰𝓻𝓸𝔀.

𝓘𝓽 𝔀𝓪𝓼 𝓪 𝓽𝓻𝓪𝓰𝓮𝓭𝔂 𝓽𝓱𝓪𝓽 𝔀𝓮 𝓱𝓪𝓭 𝓪𝓵𝓼𝓸 𝓶𝓪𝓭𝓮 𝓽𝓱𝓮 𝓼𝓪𝓶𝓮 𝓶𝓲𝓼𝓽𝓪𝓴𝓮𝓼 𝓽𝓱𝓮𝔂 𝓱𝓪𝓭. 𝓤𝓷𝓽𝓲𝓵 𝓻𝓮𝓬𝓮𝓷𝓽𝓵𝔂 𝓸𝓾𝓻 𝓷𝓾𝓶𝓫𝓮𝓻𝓼 𝓱𝓪𝓿𝓮 𝓫𝓮𝓮𝓷 𝓭𝔀𝓲𝓷𝓭𝓵𝓲𝓷𝓰 𝓪𝓷𝓭 𝔀𝓮 𝓱𝓪𝓿𝓮 𝓫𝓮𝓮𝓷 𝓹𝓮𝓻𝓲𝓼𝓱𝓲𝓷𝓰-

Noah couldn’t decipher the rest of the text presented before him. He looked back and squinting as hard as he could made out the word “humans” it seemed like they had tried to recreate cursive but forgot to connect the letters. It was choppy but enthusiastic as well.

”well we don’t have all day war-mind”

”I’m hardly a fighter thor. There is little honour in how I fight and I am disappointed to say that I honestly have little battle experience”

”and what experience do you have?”

Thor tilted his head in an adorably curious expression.

”well up until recently I could...uh actually I have no idea”

“erm what about recently?”

”well I...decapitated my clone after throwing him through a mirror by repeatedly stomping his head.”

Noah grimaced as he recalled the event.

Thor looked impressed

“and this was your first time yes?”

”first time?”

Noah didn’t like to think there would be a next time

”well you look like your holding up great for a...civilian who committed such an act”

Noah was consistently internally screaming over what he had done

”I’ll make a fine fighter of you yet rogue”

Noah sighed and wondered exactly why he was being held in such high regard. He also didn’t like being called a rogue. It was the same as “slutty knight”

Thor led Noah through the halls once more except things began growing in size as they progressed instead of shrinking down to the statue they had stopped at. Statues were in poor condition at this point and most had massive cracks or were missing legs and on one occasion a head. One group of statues stood out among the ruined ones as they were polished and untarnished. It looked as if it was made about a month ago. The statue depicted a bearded man with a soft cheerful expression...standing atop a massive body and holding a severed lions head. The next statue depicted the same man atop a massive cannon carrying a mare with a lazy eye. The next statue showed the man hunched over in grief looking longingly at three gravestones, the mare from earlier was comforting him. The final statue looked like a memorial. The man stood atop a raggid ship pointing a gun at a very bony man. The script read:

This memorial is dedicated to Alexander the Great. Who had succumbed to a curse while searching for some close friends.

”...Alex.”

”ah you seem familiar with the legend of the flying Dutch man.”

”...”

“are you ok?”

”what was Alex’s curse.”

”Alex? Oh Alexander. Well he was basically cursed to roam the seas for all eternity until he can find the object he had most desired while he was-“

Noah increased his pace and looked absolutely livid. He stormed his way through the hall and turned to the left Noah entered an armoury by mistake instead of the throne room. Noah left but not before grabbing what appeared to be a fist-full of sand from a forge in the back that seemed to be for making glass.

“hey what was that about?”

Noah held his angry expression but it now had a tinge of embarrassment to it

”wrong door”

”...”

”(sigh) just take me to the throne room”

They took a right down the hall of statues and entered an extremely large room with two large tables full of food and a fire pit in the middle of the room this lead to the red steps going up to the throne. And of course the throne itself was surprisingly barren for a seat of power. Atop the throne was a griffin with a Snow White lower body and white upper. His crown looked more protective than regal and honestly a flair of ferocity emitted from The being was waiting with a cocky smile that said “checkmate”

”HOW DARE YOU! WHERE IS ODEN!”

Wait that wasn’t oden?

”TELL ME!”

The usurper gave a malicious chuckle and Noah hid under one of the massive tables before setting Loki down gently

”oh you foolish weak children. Did you really think that a simple cage would stop me? I was right under your beaks this whole time! Plotting, scheming and planning my revenge.”

The usurper pointed to a one eyed griffin chained and hanging from the ceiling by his talons. His wings were bound to his sides by the chain and a trail of blood was flowing from his wounds

During this time oden opened his one eye and spotted Noah and Loki under the table. A look of awe was present on his face as Noah did something unexpected. He was moving during a monologue.

”-and that’s how I fooled the warden into believing that-ACK!”

”POCKET SAND!”

After throwing the sand into the usurper’s eyes Noah punched him in the throat before wrapping the chain around his arm around his fist and hitting as hard as he could in the back of the usurper’s head. He dropped to the floor and the force of Noah’s momentum had caused him to trip and land arse first on the throne.

”...uh ok then”

”how did you do that?”

”well I grabbed a fist full of sand-“

”I hate to ruin the mood but could someone please help me down from here?”

”why am I under a table?”

Comments

[Reduviidae]

Best fighting strategy
Like 100% effective (Unless they have glasses then your screwed)

[Theboxcatgamr]

9332678
I speak from experience. Glasses won’t save you from THE SAND MAN

[Theboxcatgamr]

I’m not gonna be able to write for quite a bit guys. I’m sorry. Stay frosty