A good story lets you immerse yourself into the world it creates. A great story is one you don't even realize you're in until it's over. But what about the stories where the characters come to life?
...Literally.
How about one that's a little more than just a story.
A tale of a human who has found himself in an unfamiliar world, years off in technology from his own, in a town called Canterlot... but not that Canterlot.
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A human in Equestria story with a twist.
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Cover Art by PillowRabbit! Go visit their FIMFiction Page for their info!
Edited by:
Rhawkas
leeroy_gIBZ
ArceusFan493
Something new to add, hopefully. Always welcome for criticism and suggestions.
Original Chapters:
Google Docs
Chapters (10)
It's a pretty good concept. Although WWI would be more akin to the whole "brave soldiers giving up everything to go fight, and signing up a young age to go off to Europe, only to meet hell there" thing. If you were to replace the invasion of Southern France with possibly the Hundred Days Offensive of WWI, it would probably be more interesting since WWI really isn't written about much. I know that you said that you already have the first "arc" written down, but this is just what I think of the story. Too many "war stories"take place during WWII, so usually it feels stale when another one is made.
9211497
I actually don't have the first arc written. That was the plan, but I never got that far. I like what you're saying, but when I started writing this story, I was doing WW2 reenactments and I researched a lot of WW2 equipment and life for soldiers, so I was more familiar with it at the time. As for WW1, there might be something with that in future, but I'm not sure if it'll be with James Garrett.
9211515
Alright, well I'm glad you at least are considering it!
Great writing, find it hard to believe that wasn’t history class, and that it was English, way to much information for a teacher to assign in a english class.
9211497
If you want some WW1 stuff, look at flammwarfer’s stories, there pretty good.
9211548
Well he wasn't suggesting it was required reading, he was just saying that if anyone wanted to check it out, they had that option.
I want to see where this goes, for you have piqued my interest.
And I thought WWII couldn’t get a greater crossover! I love it!
Ohh I get it, our historys' WWII is EQGs' story books or fairy tales of valor, sacrifice, virtue what have you.
So far I'm enjoying it for what it is, it's definitely interesting! Be sure to get james' character more fleshed out as the story goes on and this will be a solid read!
...bold play. I actually think that adds a very interesting dynamic to this. It also means that there is a certain poverty in the EqG world - the poverty of having missed having a generation of such heroic individuals. A lack of challenge means a lack of champions, and countries that have had to fight for their freedom tend to make better use of that freedom than those to whom it comes easily.
A rather bleak view, coming from a place of woundedness. Yet there is a grain of truth in it - no man or woman will ever be perfect, so we shouldn't expect it. That said, we can expect excellence and a genuine desire to improve. We may not be flawless, but that doesn't preclude heroic action and lasting love - knights in shining armor do exist, even if the armor is a bit dented.
Rainbow, I assume? Not Sunset?
On the whole this is a very interesting twist on the usual HiE. I like that he feels bad about cussing in front of her (as a well brought up man in his era would have), and... yeah. This is just a very interesting setup with a compelling hook. I look forward to seeing more.
May wanna fix that. But aside from this and a acouple more grammar errors, this seems pretty interesting! Tracking.
9211573
Aye but you did a decent job at making it seem like a fictional book but, no fiction ‘worldbuilding/story about war on a grand scale’ is ever that detailed, just some information for the future.
Interesting. I expected it to happen the other way, but this works rtoo.
9211573
plz continue other than that I hope to fausticorn that nothing ELSE from james world comes through like the ss for example
Totally would read more
Though D-day wasn't Amerian only operation, British and French too
9212390
you forgot Canadians
what an interesting concept! i'm excited to see where this goes!
And I forgot Canadians(
"Fascinating, Captain..."
Liked and tracking.
Interesting!
Yeah... fascinating idea, but Mr. Synopsis isn’t doing his job as an ENGLISH teacher well. This is like someone using Star Wars to teach film class, but the just nerding out about Star Destroyer specs instead of focusing on what Star Wars did for special effects and filmmaking.
Within the context of “WW2 as fiction”, the Students don’t need to memorize battlefield tactics and unit numbers. Those are the nerdy details meant to be argued over by nerds on EqG Reddit.
Fuck it, I’ll bite. Let’s see what you have for us.
Well, it got featured in about two days, so I'd say you did something right. Looking forward to more.
9212530
and Polish that were with the British.
9215073
ou yea there were small force of them weren't there. They are not much talked about in history thou, kinda like how in D-day most of the defenders were ost-batailone comprised of volunteer prisoners from eastern europe.
9215634
With one Korean.
9215697
hehe sou you too have seen "my way" movie.
9215727
nope. I just read the stories of different stuff.
Wooot! Wooot! This caught my interest as I was surfing the net. Looking forward for more! Highly anticipated!
Well this is an interesting idea. Though this worries me that on top of James being stuck there, so would Sunset. With her journal changing. Regardless I'm intrigued, and would live for more. I'll just hit the tracking button for now. Looking forward to more story.
things are going to hit the fan when james finds out huh?
Looks good
9231914
I try to make him how the soldiers were, not like how a 12-year-old thinks his Navy SEAL OC would be.
9231930 He feels a bit like Captain America, and that's a good thing considering they're in the same shoes.
9231978
And now I can't get out of my mind the voice of Chris Evans.
Well glad to see Sunset's not completely cut off from Twilight.
Ah yes, protestant work ethic. The myth of poverty as an adequate punishment for laziness rather than external causes outside own, and sometimes, anyone's control. And that by working hard enough God will help you out.
Gosh, I wonder how much damage has that bullshit caused to American society
9232453
none
9233889
Sing it!
I want more MORE LOVE THIS!
Enjoyable as always. I'm glad that the book came up early on rather than being something that got dragged out for a cliche revelation later. This might have been painful for James, but at least it rips the bandaid off and has no accompanying sense of betrayal.
This is honestly really great so far.
9272218
im just hoping nothing ELSE comes out cough NAZIS cough
Now I'm imagining his reaction to Rainbow Dash. You better make it a good one.
9272505
On the other hand, if anyone could befriend the Nazis all Daryl Davis-style and get them to leave behind their evil ways, it'd be the Equestria Girls.
9272825
Sure, if they're regular wehrmacht troops, Heer or Luftwaffe. Depending on where in the war timeline they're from, they might be happy to get out. But Schutzstaffel? Oooh, that'd a hard sell.
9272946
Doable, however. Allow me to tell you a story. Josef Mueller was a thorn in Hitler's side. He was the top Vatican spy in Germany and the point of contact between the anti-Nazi German Resistance (Canaris' and Stauffenberg's group - the guys who almost killed Hitler), the Vatican, and the Allies (the German Resistance ran their communiques through the Vatican because the Allies trusted the pope to mediate - they hoped to depose or kill Hitler and negotiate a cease-fire). Mueller was Dietrich Bonhoeffer's handler, had been working to subvert the Nazis from before the war, and was ultimately sent his the camps for his role in multiple plots to assassinate Hitler. All in all, he was your quintessential anti-Nazi. All the other conspirators were executed, but Mueller was spared thanks to a literal last-second phone call. The caller was a man from Hitler's personal bodyguard. The reason that he made the call was that Mueller had befriended this SS man before the war. Throughout the war, they maintained their odd friendship, despite the fact that the SS man knew Mueller was ardently anti-Nazi. And, whenever this friend let things about Hitler's cabal slip in private moments, Mueller secretly passed this to the Allies through the Vatican. Even once it became apparent that Mueller had, in fact, been part of the Valkyrie plot, his old SS buddy still wanted him alive. He made a call. Mueller survived the war and helped rebuild post-war Germany into a nation free of Nazi trappings thanks to an SS buddy. An unusual friendship if there ever was one. Read Church of Spies by Mark Riebling for the full story.
9273564
Fascinating. It never ceases to amaze me how history pivots on the smallest of details. Just one phone call on behalf of a friend...
Now if only school textbooks were worth the paper they were printed on, students might actually care to learn a thing or two.
9273592
To quote Digory Kirke, "Logic! Why don’t they teach logic at these schools?" Though Canterlot High seems to be doing a pretty good job in this story. I admire a professor who teaches about a fictional war in order to drive home points of heroism and self-sacrifice to residents of a more comfortable world.
More please this story' is good