1899439 Does it really look that bad that it seems like a mistake? Edited. I italicized "you" as well. Aroo...I'll let it sit before I review again. I tend to go blind to mistakes after staring at a doc for too long.
Yes!! Finally!! I can tell the style is already different... Wait is that right?... I don't know the fic feels different now. I can't put it into words. Maybe lighter, wait more badass then fuck you maybe closer. Oh well it's great and that was an excellent update. Chow Bennet out!!
1899472 IT just sounds weird to read out loud. "didn't have this you with her." If you were trying to make a pause, to have Starla go from "this" to "you," use a dash; "didn't have this—you with her." IF that was what you were going for, then I see. If not, then this particular part is just weird to read. ('o_o)
1899472 Pesky Mayans... always failing to deliver the end of the world. So this will continue after all. I kinda want to see Rarity Spike and Starla in a threesome... again.
Side note. Is it weird I can hear Spike speaking in the voice of Batman?
1900315 Yeah it's been a while since I tried to get into the mood for writing this. But I figure to tweaked style represents the change in direction I've been meaning to take this story on. Good on ya to notice.
1900148>>1901184>>1901837>>1902240>>1902417>>1900567 That really makes me glad to read. *sniff*
1903853 Well it defiantly is a different feel from the "other" one, even from the previous chapters somehow this feels refreshing. Are you going to totally deviate from the predecessor of this fic? I'm sure there is a sense of trepidation, people already read DSP, the story must follow that, no this has established itself as a stand alone fic. Really there are a few things that are shared between the two, well a lot actually, but I'm sure a lot of people would enjoy to see where you want to go with it. Let it come naturally. Just have a lot of clop!!
fucking mayans
There were several errors in the writing, but I'm too tired to point them out. But there is this:
didn't have this you with her..."
1899439
Does it really look that bad that it seems like a mistake? Edited. I italicized "you" as well.
Aroo...I'll let it sit before I review again. I tend to go blind to mistakes after staring at a doc for too long.
1899439 I don't think that is an error, he should have just italicized the word 'this' in order to show emphasis.
Thanks for continuing it.
Yes!! Finally!! I can tell the style is already different... Wait is that right?... I don't know the fic feels different now. I can't put it into words. Maybe lighter, wait more badass then fuck you maybe closer. Oh well it's great and that was an excellent update.
Chow Bennet out!!
... Wow. I'm honestly surprised. There's going to be more to the story than just the return of a lustful monster. I'm... honestly excited about this!
I knew you'd be back, the Mayan calender said so!
Does this mean you're not going to delete this story anymore? Glad to see you're still working on it!
Moar!!!!!!
This is going in a rather nice direction. Cheers.
Aw, yeah. This makes me far happier than I should be.
1899472 IT just sounds weird to read out loud. "didn't have this you with her." If you were trying to make a pause, to have Starla go from "this" to "you," use a dash; "didn't have this—you with her." IF that was what you were going for, then I see. If not, then this particular part is just weird to read. ('o_o)
1899472 Pesky Mayans... always failing to deliver the end of the world. So this will continue after all. I kinda want to see Rarity Spike and Starla in a threesome... again.
Side note. Is it weird I can hear Spike speaking in the voice of Batman?
1840981
Hey. Psst. Hey. I updated.
1900315
Yeah it's been a while since I tried to get into the mood for writing this. But I figure to tweaked style represents the change in direction I've been meaning to take this story on. Good on ya to notice.
1900148>>1901184>>1901837>>1902240>>1902417>>1900567
That really makes me glad to read. *sniff*
1900864
haha
1902819
Not trying to make a pause, trying to have her emphasize saying "this you" like 1899546 said. Which I did, by the way.
1903516
Who says Windfall won't end up being the Joker?
1903853 Still sounds weird to me. ('o_o)
1903853
Well it defiantly is a different feel from the "other" one, even from the previous chapters somehow this feels refreshing. Are you going to totally deviate from the predecessor of this fic? I'm sure there is a sense of trepidation, people already read DSP, the story must follow that, no this has established itself as a stand alone fic. Really there are a few things that are shared between the two, well a lot actually, but I'm sure a lot of people would enjoy to see where you want to go with it. Let it come naturally.
Just have a lot of clop!!
2066373
If that's true you'll only have better and better clop to look forward to from much more talented writers than me on this site!
She would want. Rarity would want. She would want to be raped by Spike...errr, the master.
Now, I like as everything are going to right.