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Where does Cadance go the fifteenth night of every month? Shining wishes he knew. She claims that she's having trouble sleeping, or that she's attending some sort of meeting with her aunts, but he can tell something is different when she comes home. He'll stop at nothing to find out what's going on.
And he'll regret knowing.
Commissioned by Backlash91, who also draws!
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Ooh, this was a delicious read. Great job sprinkling breadcrumbs through the story. I loved every minute of this.
Nicely done. A little less creepy at the end, perhaps, for an omnivorous species like us, but surely heart-stopping for poor Shining. Though the fact that cows are intelligent in the MLP universe (and perhaps other livestock species?) raises the stakes.
The idea behind this sure makes sense, though. After all, aren't the Alicorns supposed to embody all pony species?
All in all, good work. I give it 3 Spooky Scary Skeletons out of 4, and I'll throw in some Shivers Down Your Spine for free.
I feel like the story was a bit longer than it needed to be and thus the setup should've been shortened. Otherwise, though, this was pretty decent, although the ending does leave a lot of unanswered questions.
Red Meat: it gives you wings (or a horn if you are already a pegasus)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ws2If8h8-pE
8490891
...I don't know what to say
. Okay, maybe I do know what to say, and it is this:
That was awesome. I am so glad I read this.
Honestly, I had a bit of an emotional roller-coaster reading this. I was intrigued, a little scared, kinda worried, and in the end, I laughed because out of everything I was expecting it definitely wasn't that (which, by the way, is a good thing). Well done with this one mate, it was brilliant
.
Mistagged comedy spotted.
My, what a delicious story. Your set-up was good, and the hints here and there were quite a treat. By the end I had a good idea what was on the menu, but the delivery was satisfying and filling none-the-less.
Quite a build up, I must say, I was expecting many things, but... not that.
I'm half disappointed, I was expecting something a bit more... grim. But, this suits just fine.
Nabad, nabad. Not sure if it should be such a big deal as to keep it in secrecy like that, though. I mean it would make sense if alicorns had to actually devour living lifestock, but simply a serving of mutton? I`d think Shining Armor would be by the necessity of his office exposed enough to griffons not to be too ruffled by occassional meat dish.
Wait.. that's it? That's the ending? Horses in real life would eat small animals at times, and there would likely be meat eating species to begin with... I've never really been let down so much by such an interesting setup.
She's kept up a whole lifetime of secrecy that's.. practically nothing really. It's just cooked meat! I've seen the horses eat fish from the stream! They are well known for chomping down on small birds at times.
I'd honestly find it funny if after all this, it's really just the princesses don't know that the ponies likely may not care anymore and they just are out of date. "Oh yeah the meat thing, saw a griffon eat a thing of it a while back. Was gross, but it's pretty accepted for their diet. Can I get a soda honey?"
8491329
Mutton is sheep. Sheep can speak.
8491366
They are.. But given that they can speak, but Applejack ignored their protests entirely of "You could've just asked us!" and had used Winona to herd them up it's in that really strange situation of what class of 'pony' they are considered (And why Applejack owns pigs, but that's another issue entirely)
In the comics Applejack even exclaimed "Pork Chops and Applesauce!" before, despite their dubious canonization. So unless there's an exclamation about a Pig music mixed with food somehow, there's something known about cooked meat.
8491376
Presumably not the edible kind. I've eaten everything from ostrich to horse to kangaroo, but even I'd have some difficulty munching down on something that can ask me not to.
8491381
Shoulda gone with lamb instead. People mighta got the whole sapient eating taboo thing
Not only are sheep seemingly sentient in universe, but it seems the entire Equestrian society is specifically vegetarian. The biggest shock though, would come from learning that Alicorns may look and act like ponies, but besides the massive difference in power, there's something decidedly un-equine about them. Not only do they eat meat, but they also seemingly need to keep an illusion up to hide the fact that they have a carnivore's teeth; not just an omnivore's, a carnivore's.
8491384
I found myself thinking the same, but I think mutton is probably the choice that makes more sense. It's an obscure word that would only matter to a meat-eater, while "lamb" is actually the proper word for a young sheep. The shoe takes a bit longer to drop, but it works better in context.
Horses can eat meat.
This was a build up to nothing. Literally nothing. I feel cheated out of a good ending. I was expecting something horrific, like they were eating ponies, or were vampires or werewolves of something. Instead, it's just something that ponies should be able to do anyway. At least have Shining say, "That's it?" Or at least have him be horrified. By ending on the line you did, it's more aggravating than shocking. It's almost hilariously disappointing.
This does not deserve a dark tag. Drama, yes, but it was not dark at all. Like, at all. This is one of the few times I regret having read a story. 8491081is right. This needs a comedy tag, because the twist is so laughably pointless that I almost chuckled. Instead, I'm left with a sense of hollowness, of having wasted 15 minutes.
I'm sorry for going off like this. I know you're a fine author, but this is just a waste of a story. It's not dark, it's comedic in its summation, and incredibly frustrating looking back.
8491384
It might've been, but at the same time there could be easily mitigating circumstances. Eating those that are already close to death, allowing for others to donate bodies after death.. The idea of cooked meat makes it hard to imagine they would need something else. An obligate carnivore usually isn't very picky about being able to grab something far weaker, and if they are already dead and cooked then it means that there are things to mitigate the horrors. The mutton/lamb doesn't mean much unless there's a living thing on the plate really.
This is not me saying your story is bad by the way! I did enjoy it and it kept me with a heady sense of suspense and curiosity throughout the entire thing. It's just the ending just... threw me off.
8491392
8491394
Personally, I really had to giggle at that point myself, because it's just so anticlimactic in its presentation after all that build-up, but it really helps if you think of it as the pony counterpart to a werewolf or vampire story. Imagine your wife going "honey, I'm a secret ghûla, and I hunger for the succulent flesh of the living" and going out to eat your neighbours once a month.
Ethically sourced or no, that's a mighty uncomfortable situation for anyone to be in. Still, it's a story being told to a species of werewolves and vampires, so really, it's only natural that the shock effect is a bit lost.
8491401
Ethically sourced alternate food options are always entertaining to me because of how rare they are, but one can understand the idea of not wanting to do it because it really defangs a horror story if you've got a bunch of blood bags prepared for a vampire, or if they require living blood a bunch of donors willing to just settle back for a bite in a medical clinic nearby like some sort of fast food restaurant. 🍩
But yes I do suppose that may be one of the reasons why the shock is mitigated.. I was imagining some sort of true fae sort of situation by the time I was coming up to it.
8491416
I expect that is the main reason why the story doesn't specify, yes.
Whatever the issues with the ending (already discussed in depth by people who've put more thought into this world), Shining's experience was chillingly vivid.
8491451
Some things are horrors more because we imagine them to be. The mind is its own place. It can make Devils of anyone.
8491423
Actually while it doesn't specify.. It does hint that there's less cruelty to the manner of the feast then just because. From Cadence's earlier viewpoint we see that Celestia has "Expressed a distaste" for it. Twilight is very uncomfortable with the idea of either someone knowing, or her brother doing so and I can't imagine she coped well earlier on given she was originally pony. Celestia is highly polite during the end, if concerned given that a newcomer has come, but given what she's stated that means that there have been other secret keepers that have discovered this at some point and time and that they have not killed them as a result, though there is that darker ploy of forcing one to magical secrecy.
If there was some unquestioned additional cruelty to the act of killing it doesn't show. It isn't some revelry just because they enjoy killing, but it does seem that they outright require it... There is a murder involved with someone sapient, but overall it makes it seem a bit darker not because they outright truly revel in it like some sort of potential monster (Well maybe, given Cadence's thoughts of Luna earlier), but it's a necessary function just to be , it is cruelty to someone but that cruelty must happen for them to function.
I feel bamboozled
8491499
You misunderstood me there. I meant to say that I prefer not to speculate, because I think the story chooses not to reveal it on purpose and leaving it a mystery adds to the feel of it.
8491533
Oh whoops, my apologies for such.
A live 🐑 would have been horrifying.
So is this supposed to a comedy twist ending or something?
And now I have this image in my head of Shiny looking around aghast, blinking once, twice, then giving his wife the deadest-of-pan looks. "That's it?! All the cloak and dagger for this? Honey, I see the gryphon ambassadorial staff eating regularly! Sorry princesses, but I'm going back to bed because you're being ridiculous. Honey, enjoy, but make sure to brush your teeth. I'll see you all in the morning when you've gotten all the crazy out."
8491484
man, what a pretentious comment!
I guess she likes the other meat, too.
8491719
Either that or reaching into one of his many stashes of liquor because "I'm too sober for this shit."
8491719
Absolutely.
*blinks slowly*
Sooo... that's it? I thought Equestria didn't discriminate against carnivores and omnivores? Heck, one night of animal protein a month is better than most omnivores can get away with.
Was pretty good overall though just like everyone is saying the ending is kind of lacking a hard hitting punch. With that said I've read enough Alicorns have to do evil stuff to stay immortal type of fics to guess the twist but I love how Shining Armor is portrayed in this and how well the mystery was built up.
memegenerator.net/img/instances/500x/57520102/keep-up-the-good-work.jpg
8491392
8491401
Well, I don't exactly feel "cheated" or anything like that, let me just say right from the beginning. With that out of the way... I honestly believed the twist would be how Alicorns are a mix of all pony tribes, including bat ponies, and that's why they needed to drink pony blood.
I guess if I had to explain my thoughts, it would be like this: either omnivores and carnivores are welcome in Equestria or they aren't, period. I have seen so many stories where a character winds up liking meat and acts like it'd be the end of the world if anyone else found out, and it's just... kind of silly, really. Which isn't to say that it can't work, I've seen some very good stories dig deeply into this psychological minefield.
In one story Twilight winds up trying meat at a diplomatic dinner, Celestia tries to coach her through her 'ordeal' only for Twilight to really, really like it. She then starts trying out meat dishes on her own only for Spike to discover her, leading the two of them on a culinary journey that remains sadly unfinished. See, the appeal of that story was in the taboo, the idea that you are doing something naughty that society wouldn't approve of. Sure, Twilight might have freaked out over it once or twice, but she's Twilight, that's kind of just how she is.
Now on the other side of the coin we have a tale of ye olden Equestria back when the Griffon lands where an Equestrian territory. In that story eating meat was outright illegal thanks to some very screwy laws signed into practice by the then pony-raised Griffon leader. This lead to some truly horrific things, such as Griffons going through extreme cosmetic makeovers to look more like ponies, and the use of Griffon bone-meal in their food just so they could meet their animal protein requirements. Now that knocked me out of my seat.
So I suppose the idea here is that it's either socially taboo, or it's outright banned. But if the public outcry against meat-eaters is so high, and all the royalty just so happens to require animal protein, then why wouldn't they work to make meat-eating more socially acceptable? It's not like they lack the time or influence to do so.
8491944
As has been mentioned in the comments, they are eating mutton - that is to say, the meat of an intelligent, talking species.
8491904
Well, that's definitely on the vampire end of the scale, but I must say, the thought occurred to me.
8491949
But we have to give the benefit of the doubt that the princesses wouldn't eat a sentient animal. SO maybe there's a species that isn't sentient. Or, if they do, it either died of natural causes, donated its body, willingly sacrificed itself, or again, they must be used to it because it's implied that griffons eat meat, which, as many have pointed out, would make it not incredibly shocking to Shining.
personal I though it would have been vampire base drink blood of living, or 4 of them drain some random soul every month.....but just mutton that is not too bad.
8491962
A reasonable conclusion to come to, but I think that in the heat of the moment, that kind of cool-headed reasoning may be beyond most people. He did have a few very stressful weeks and that really is rather a large shock by any measure. Knowing that the grandma you caught your wife chewing on died of natural causes is... substantially less of a consolation than it sounds when put in abstract terms like that.
8491392
Agreed.
It's well done, and the build up is great, but the payoff is pretty non-existent. There are other carnivorous and omnivorous species in Equestria, so surely this wouldn't be something so bone-shakingly verboten as to be behind closed doors and secret.
Given that it's just Alicorns, and it's once a month, whose to say that the animals who become food haven't died of natural causes? In the same way driver's licenses have "donor" stipulations on them, perhaps this is the case for other prey species in Equestria.
8491944
What fic was that?
8491977
It's the HiE with Voltaire in it.
8491949
*flips through the wiki* Huh... so they are. They still live like domesticated animals, but yes, they can talk. Which I suppose raises an interesting question, why specifically are they eating mutton? Furthermore, why is the Griffon chef so obviously okay with this? I mean, from the way he took one look at Shining and went 'Oh no, I didn't make enough food!' he obviously doesn't view this as anything out of the ordinary.
I mean... if they need to eat meat, okay, yeah, sure, fine, let's go with that, but why eat the meat of a sentient creature? And if they specifically need to eat the meat of a sentient creature then why not just say that? Furthermore I'm struggling to come up with a reason why the meat of a sentient animal is different from regular meat. I mean, if said animal was still alive you could make the argument that it was different from other animals, but once it's dead the only thing any different is the brain and maybe a few other organs, but the Alicorns aren't eating brains or organs they're eating mutton, cooked muscular tissue and fat, which should be no different from any other slab of cooked muscular tissue and fat, taste aside.
8491998
That is a good question, isn't it? Now you know why the whole thing is Dark-tagged. I am very strongly thinking of Fava beans and a nice Chianti right now.
8491969
Well, all this is moot because we have no idea how Shining reacted. For all we know, he could have laughed and danced a jig.
Why did this get featured? This story plot is well horrible to say the least.
Firstly it does not need to be mutton. That’s what’s so annoying. Chicken and pork are much better and healthier. Secondly they could eat the carnivores from the everfree Forrest if they need meat. And as others have pointed out, horses can eat meat naturally.
I was expecting carnage to be some kind of nightmare. And that this is all just some huge backstory/explanation for nightmare moon. Example: all alicorns have a demon side. Which will take over unless you appease it. And as such because Luna felt bad about whatever horrible deed she had to do, she stopped and the nightmare took over.
Whatever. Just disappointed.
The quality is stupendous though.