Longer wait? It’s okay, I could imagine how Tempest feels I imagine I’m Tempest and I can see she’s afraid with everypony looking at her. Keep up the good work!
8503292 Thanks! I'm glad you're enjoying it so far! The cliffhanger was actually a last-minute change on my part. It was originally what Twilight said, but I like this change more. Adds a bit more mystery, but I think there's enough clues to figure out what she said. ;)
8503302 Awesome, I'm glad! I'm definitely trying to get across a feeling of not only empathy but relativity. I try to make Tempest seem real and akin to things the reader might experience, to create a greater connection and interest. Personally, it's an okay job so far. I hope to strengthen this with later chapters.
8503369 Oh yeah, definitely. I can totally understand why you're feeling that. Tempest isn't a good person. It's unfortunate, but it's a fact she has to face. There's a reason why she's disliked by not only the hospital staff and the guards, but all of Canterlot. And lust does play a big part in her initial reaction to Twilight, good spot there!
In further chapters, I'm hoping to turn her initial reaction on its head and develop it into something more. There's definitely a long road of redemption however before like you said, she's worthy of it.
8503401 Hehe, don't feel bad! To be fair, I enjoyed it as well. ;) Tempest needed a good stuffing anyways, for being such a butt in the movie.
8504138 Awesome! I'm glad you're enjoying it so far! There are several Tempest x Twilight stories out there though if you're looking to quench your thirst. ;) The Tempestlight and TempestSparkle groups have a handful, if you don't know about those yet.
I'd highly suggest to check it out! There are a lot of talented writers over there.
I just hope that even if she is "redeemed", Tempest doesn't change too much. I like her a lot as she is (Not in small part due to the fact that I have the exact same philosophy and outlook on life as her... ) I think she underestimated Snow Ball's strength, because most of the time, being a nurse doesn't go well with being a weakling. Even without factoring the fact of what you have to see and do during training (and that's plenty), it takes some strength to do what she is doing right now and stick with it. Being devoted to be a good nurse to the point of caring without fail for someone everyone else would like to see dead isn't something someone weak could do... Even more so given that she did it with a smile even with Tempest abuse. The mob however just showed how weak they are. Assaulting someone who is bound and helpless (and you had nothing to do with it), or not in any situation to defend herself, is just disgraceful. Even more so if you need a mob to do so. Snow Ball is probably miles stronger than they are, and you can bet most wouldn't realize it or even spare a glance at her, meek as she is. Aaanyway, leaving that aside, let's see how it goes between her and Twilight. My bet is "awkward" is going to be insufficient to describe the situation adequately.
8509381 I don't have any plans on changing her massively.
Granted, there is an arc set in place, and I do want her changing over the course of the story (otherwise it would be flat and boring). However, I do want to keep her fiery personality. It's a huge part of her identity. Doing a full 360 like Sunset Shimmer or Starlight would ruin a lot of things readers like about her.
And about Snow Ball, you're absolutely right! Nurses do go through so much, not only during training, but day-to-day as well. Throw in the fact that there was an invasion where more than a dozen was killed and countless injured or sick, and you have an idea what Snow Ball is experiencing. After all that, can you still call her weak?
I packed a lot of subtext into this story. There's tons of stuff like this, such as a) why does Snow Ball still care for Tempest despite knowing she's the enemy, b) can Tempest's point-of-view be trusted, c) why does Tempest see the world like this, d) does the mob really want to hurt Tempest, or are they doing it for other reasons?
Of course, don't actually answer them. Those are a handful of things I'm thinking about when writing this story. I love it when my reader thinks and analyzes and asks questions about it. I not only want to engage my reader, but also walk away with something meaningful.
oh crap.. um twi, u ok?
8503283
It's okay. She's always comfortable as the bottom.
8488133
Thank you! Glad you're enjoying it so far!
And they should have Tempest emoticons! Quick, to the inboxes! frantically spams a million PMs to knighty's inbox
Another great chapter, another great cliff hanger that makes me need more! Keep it up!
Longer wait? It’s okay, I could imagine how Tempest feels I imagine I’m Tempest and I can see she’s afraid with everypony looking at her. Keep up the good work!
I know it's wrong, but it's difficult not to find some joy in a mob of "weak" ponies beating the stuffing out of Tempest.
8503289
Hahahaha No kidding.
Oh snap!
I had been waiting for a good Tempest/Twilight story and looks like I finally found one. I look forward to the next update.
8503292
Thanks! I'm glad you're enjoying it so far! The cliffhanger was actually a last-minute change on my part. It was originally what Twilight said, but I like this change more. Adds a bit more mystery, but I think there's enough clues to figure out what she said. ;)
8503302
Awesome, I'm glad! I'm definitely trying to get across a feeling of not only empathy but relativity. I try to make Tempest seem real and akin to things the reader might experience, to create a greater connection and interest. Personally, it's an okay job so far. I hope to strengthen this with later chapters.
8503369
Oh yeah, definitely. I can totally understand why you're feeling that. Tempest isn't a good person. It's unfortunate, but it's a fact she has to face. There's a reason why she's disliked by not only the hospital staff and the guards, but all of Canterlot. And lust does play a big part in her initial reaction to Twilight, good spot there!
In further chapters, I'm hoping to turn her initial reaction on its head and develop it into something more. There's definitely a long road of redemption however before like you said, she's worthy of it.
8503401
Hehe, don't feel bad! To be fair, I enjoyed it as well. ;) Tempest needed a good stuffing anyways, for being such a butt in the movie.
8503671
I know right?!
8503683
Oh snaaaaap!
8504138
Awesome! I'm glad you're enjoying it so far! There are several Tempest x Twilight stories out there though if you're looking to quench your thirst. ;) The Tempestlight and TempestSparkle groups have a handful, if you don't know about those yet.
I'd highly suggest to check it out! There are a lot of talented writers over there.
8504431
Ohhhh snapppppppppppp!!!!!
WOOOOO-
CHAPTER!!
Chapter Dansus
I just hope that even if she is "redeemed", Tempest doesn't change too much. I like her a lot as she is (Not in small part due to the fact that I have the exact same philosophy and outlook on life as her... )
I think she underestimated Snow Ball's strength, because most of the time, being a nurse doesn't go well with being a weakling. Even without factoring the fact of what you have to see and do during training (and that's plenty), it takes some strength to do what she is doing right now and stick with it. Being devoted to be a good nurse to the point of caring without fail for someone everyone else would like to see dead isn't something someone weak could do... Even more so given that she did it with a smile even with Tempest abuse.
The mob however just showed how weak they are. Assaulting someone who is bound and helpless (and you had nothing to do with it), or not in any situation to defend herself, is just disgraceful. Even more so if you need a mob to do so. Snow Ball is probably miles stronger than they are, and you can bet most wouldn't realize it or even spare a glance at her, meek as she is.
Aaanyway, leaving that aside, let's see how it goes between her and Twilight. My bet is "awkward" is going to be insufficient to describe the situation adequately.
8505077
Wooooo chaaaapter! :D
8509381
I don't have any plans on changing her massively.
Granted, there is an arc set in place, and I do want her changing over the course of the story (otherwise it would be flat and boring). However, I do want to keep her fiery personality. It's a huge part of her identity. Doing a full 360 like Sunset Shimmer or Starlight would ruin a lot of things readers like about her.
And about Snow Ball, you're absolutely right! Nurses do go through so much, not only during training, but day-to-day as well. Throw in the fact that there was an invasion where more than a dozen was killed and countless injured or sick, and you have an idea what Snow Ball is experiencing. After all that, can you still call her weak?
I packed a lot of subtext into this story. There's tons of stuff like this, such as a) why does Snow Ball still care for Tempest despite knowing she's the enemy, b) can Tempest's point-of-view be trusted, c) why does Tempest see the world like this, d) does the mob really want to hurt Tempest, or are they doing it for other reasons?
Of course, don't actually answer them. Those are a handful of things I'm thinking about when writing this story. I love it when my reader thinks and analyzes and asks questions about it. I not only want to engage my reader, but also walk away with something meaningful.
Thanks for reading!
Interesting
Three chapters in and my emotions are already being toyed with.
Shut up and take my like!