Why. You have a character, they have a background, experiences, and you still insist on a second person narration. First Person and Third Person are infinitely better. That's not opinion, it's fact. Writing in second person is cancer.
Unfortunately, I won't be updating this story in the foreseeable future
But please, feel free to check out my other completed stories Might I suggest: The Wolf of War It's a story that I'm constantly updating as my schedule allows
Used "me" instead of "you" once. Otherwise this was fucking awesome
8343374
If you tell me where I'd gladly fix it
Deus Vult Deus Vult Deus Vult Deus Vult Deus Vult Deus Vult Deus Vult Deus Vult Deus Vult Deus Vult Deus Vult Deus Vult Deus Vult Deus Vult
I just listened to Sabaton while reading this, amazing.
8350097
Glad you enjoyed it!
BTW, Dark Souls is my favorite game that I love to hate.
>second person present tense
Why. You have a character, they have a background, experiences, and you still insist on a second person narration. First Person and Third Person are infinitely better. That's not opinion, it's fact. Writing in second person is cancer.
8362044
Thank you for your input. This was one of my first stories and the only experience in telling stories I had was through d&D.
I'll keep what you said in mind for any future stories that I write with an established character.
*Holy Music stops*
10049248
Glad you enjoyed that line
Unfortunately, I won't be updating this story in the foreseeable future
But please, feel free to check out my other completed stories
Might I suggest: The Wolf of War It's a story that I'm constantly updating as my schedule allows