The slightly insane brony out to just have fun and hope to get a little praise along the way. Nice to meet you!
This is the story of VortexTslon, a young and adventures brony. He is taken to Equestria by Discord to stir up a little chaos as his aprentice. Wether it be for better or worse. Chaos is as chaos does. And chaos is very unpredictabl, just like this story.
I'm just writting this cause i can. Hope you all Like it. If not, I'm still gonna write it.
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1529054 duely noted, Ill change it up in the next few chapters and edit later.
I, uh, how do I put this... You might want to put a mature tag on this. Protect the innocent, dude.
In addition to that, I do agree with a lot of the others that you're going way too fast, and on top of that, I'm pretty damn sure it's not normal for someone to get some booty that quickly after meeting someone. Of course, I could be wrong but he's also been thrown into a completely new world, so I would imagine that there would at least be a few important issues. Just remember this quote and find a way to apply it, and you should be fine storywise: "Even the best laid plans of mice and men often go awry."
1531301 agreed, but pls note, wrote that all in one night, that one, after a long day. I was half asleep when I wrote it. I do plan on changing it but, not taking it out. And yeah, it is still to fast, but I think i managed to slow it down more than the original version. I'm going to go edit chapter 4 a bit, should have it fperfect in like two weeks, aslo, thx, I actuely forgot to put this as mature.
i like the new version better
Thanks for the new background music, bro.
You say you wanted to update the story so that it isn't as rushed...
But 4 chapters and the character has already pretty much gotten laid (sorta)
Well... at least there isn't a baby involved...
Yet...
EDIT: I should also mention that there are A LOT less mistakes since you got that editor.
Or... something.
is Vertex a Nightfury!!!!!!?!?!?!?!?!?!?YESYESYESYESYEYES!!!!!*dancing around the room*
ooohoo~~~XD
6064481 hmm, funny i almost forgot about this story of mine. Might comeback and revamp at some point.
6064875 .......YAY
6064886 first i have to get through my current story (and get well into the new fic I'm working on) and then I'll come back, so give me some time and I'll be back at it.