My Little Heartbreak: Meanwhile, Back at the Farm

by Jet_Black1980

The Shower Scene

Chapter Four

The Shower Scene.

My mind has frozen in place and I can feel my left eye twitching almost violently. “Fuck. Fuck. Fuck! Great. I got fanon edition Lyra! Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!”

“Are you alright?” Bon-Bon asks me.

“Huh? Yeah, Fine!” I finally burst out. “Just. Fine. I just get nervous ticks sometimes! The what?”

“The Human Lovers-” Lyra beings.

“I heard that part.” Calm down, H.B. You are a bomb tech right now, cutting the wrong wire could result in rather horrible consequences. “But what’s a ha-haaaa,” Crap, I’m stuttering on a word. Not right now! Come on! Just let me say ‘human!’ “HAaahuuumon?”

The two of them look at me funny. “It’s human,” Lyra quips.

I look away from the two of them and try again. “Ha-yuuuumon.”

Lyra raises her hooves and tries to explain. “No, Hu-man.”

I try to repeat “Huuuu-Ma-a-a-a-an,” I cover my mouth. I was bleating like a sheep.

“No! It’s-” Lyra starts.

“Look! I have a speech impediment, alright!?” I really don’t want to continue this conversation. It’s frustrating me and causing me to feel a great deal of grief. If we go any further, I am just going to end up exploding and looking like a total spazz to the first pair of ponies that I have seen outside the library in weeks. I don’t need that. “Some words trip me up and make me stutter. That word happens to be one of them.”

“That’s a strange sort of speech impediment,” Lyra states.

Bon-Bon elbows her. “Lyra! Can’t you see that she is sensitive about it?”

“Right...Sorry, Heartbreak,” Lyra says, looking at me. “But, a Human is a mythological race of beings that are said to have lived in Equestria at one time. They walked bipedally all the time, were mostly hairless, had creepy eyes, wore clothes all the time and best of all...” she pulls out a drawing from her saddle bag, “They had hands!”

The drawing looks like a creepy doodle of what someone would think a human would look like if they had never seen one before. It looks sorta like a human, but they have a mohawk, they are hunched over like they can’t stand straight, the feet are all crooked, their noses are too flat, and the fingers on their hands look disproportionate. I am looking at two nightmares at the same time. One is actually meeting Lyra Heartstrings - Fannon Lyra Heartstrings. The other is this strange amalgamation of what ponies think humans are meant to look like. And on top of all that, she’s called me ‘Heartbreak’ twice. It’s starting to grate on my nerves a little bit. I should ask her to stop.

“R-r-r-right, and this has to do with holes in hooves, why?” I finally ask.

“Well, with a hole in your hoof like that, you could theoretically hold things like you could if you had hands!” Lyra states.

I fake my best confused face at her. “Uh-right... Sure you could.” Play it cool, H.B. I turn and give her a weirded out expression. “Like I said, I did it while I was high on magic tea and didn’t know what I was doing. It weakened my h-hoof and I am lucky not to be in a medical bed right now. So! How about we find those books for you two?” I start looking around a bit frantically. “So you two can, you know,” I turn my head to look at them, “Leave? And I can take that shower!” Lyre, lyre. Ah-ha! There it is. I quickly nab it from a stray pile of books that I have stacked up.

Lyra blinks at me confused. “Whoa, hold up, I didn’t mean to offend you or anything,” she bends her head down next to mine as I place the book at her hooves. “I totally understand if you are a bit skittish about talking about this sorta stuff in front of a,” she eyes Bon-Bon, “Fingerless.”

I jump back and look around for the next requested book. I have never been so uncomfortable in my life. It shouldn’t really be a big issue here, but seriously, Lyra is creeping me out. I think I should flow with that feeling. “I don’t know what you are talking about, Lyra. But I think I see the other two books you wanted.” I have never wanted to find books this quickly before in my life. Darn it! Slow down, act awkward and just act like you want her out of the library - not like she has discovered something.

While retrieving the other books, I can hear Bon-Bon whispering something to Lyra. I can’t quite make it out, but it kinda sounds like “Lyra, please stop freaking out the normal ponies!”

I see the other two books that Lyra requested. No wonder I couldn’t find them. They are near the top of the shelf. Crudmuffins. I stand up and reach out to see if I can get to them.

“Um, do you need any help there, Heartbreak?” BonBon asks.

Third time’s a charm. In this small stressful moment, I am reminded how much I hate that name. I have been really spoiled with Twilight and Spike calling me ‘H.B.’ almost all the time, that I have forgotten that it is just a foreshortening of Heartbreak. The reminder causes a stir of old memories of that night to crop up in the back of my mind. And with it, the sensation of having my flesh seared in agony. I attempt to push the feeling aside. It’s bad enough that I have looked like a flake here. I don’t need to explode in a fiery emotional trainwreck in front of these two. “Again. They are the first two beings you have seen since ‘creativi-tea’, yeah, I’m going to call it that. Just. Calm. Your. Self. Just-”

“Are you alright, Hear-” BonBon begins.

I interrupt her. “I hope this isn’t terribly forward of me,” I respond through clenched teeth. “But please refrain from calling me, that.” Unclench your jaw, H.B. They don’t know any better.

“You don’t want to be called ‘Heartbreak?’” Lyra asks. “But isn’t that your name?”

I fight off a twitch. It is the first twitch from hearing my ‘name’ that I have felt in a long time, I almost forgot how violent they are. How unpleasant they can be. “Yes,” I reply pausing. “But, I don’t like it. I really, really don’t like it.” I cock my head to the side and look at Lyra out of the corner of my eye. She jumps and meeps. “If you think it not too forward of me, please, call me H.B. I like it a lot better.” Lyra is now giving me a very frightened look. Geeze! Stop whatever you’re doing, H.B.! You don’t need to frighten ponies like this!

“So you’d rather be called, ‘H.B.?’” Bon-Bon asks.

I bite my lower lip in order to kill that rolling anger. It helps a little, hearing ‘H.B.’, helps even more and is just enough to calm me down. “Yes please, I like it better.” I tap-tap the books at the top shelf. They aren’t coming down with me just tapping on them. They wiggle and wobble, but they don’t fall down.

“Lyra, could you go help her, please?” Bon-Bon asks.

There is a momentary pause. I think that I may have given Lyra a stare that scared her a bit. Great. More Gilda coming out of me than an actual pony. I stretch and push to get that book. Lyra sighs, I can almost hear her rolling her eyes. “Fine, but only because you asked, Bon-Bon.”

The twinkling sound of magic hums into my ears and the books float above me. I sigh, and turn my back to the bookcase and slump down. Involuntarily, I wrap an arm around the part of my leg that is equivocal to what used to be my knee. “Thanks, Lyra,” I mutter, darkly. I shouldn’t be feeling this way. After all, the situation doesn’t call for it. She was here to get her books, I could have just pointed the books out, and she could have used her magic to get them. Instead, I make a fuss over things that should be nothing and look like a spazz. Good job, H.B. got any more tricks?

“Don’t think anything of iiii-” Lyra stops and looks at me, stunned.

Blinking, I look confused at her. “What? Do I have something in my teeth?” I use my tongue to try and check my teeth. That’s when the magical hum stops and I feel the solid blow of book meeting cranium. Once, twice, and thrice! “OUCH!” I shout, pulling myself up. “What was that for!?”

Lyra jumps back. “Um, I just-”

The anger rolls up in me again. “No, you know what? I am not in the mood for this today. You two have your books, and I need my shower!” I pick up one of the books and attempt to shove it into Lyra’s saddle bag. It fits. Sort of. Then I do the other one.

“Really, I didn’t mean to-” Lyra begins, attempting to apologize.

“I’m sure you didn’t. But right now? Really, I just want a shower. I have been working all day, alone in the library - All week if you want to get technical - and in that time I haven’t had a nice calming shower.” I pick up the copy of Diamond Colts Book Two and rush it over to Bon-Bon. She gingerly takes it from me. I turn my attention to Lyra. I really hope I don’t have to push her out the door. She looks at me in a way that I can’t really read. I am not sure if it is sadness, confusion or fear. Maybe all three. I point to the door.

“All right,” she replies, walking to the door. Bon-Bon has already taken the hint. While I wasn’t looking, she must have opened the door and is already half way out. Lyra on the other hand, or hoof, or whatever, stops at the doorway. “Really, I didn’t mean it, it’s just-”

I face hoof and snort. “Lyra, it isn’t you, it’s me. I have already explained why, and I would really appreciate it if you went with Bon-Bon and do whatever it is that you’re going to do today, alright?” I am fighting not to make my words sound scathing.

Lyra gives me an uncomfortable look, sighs and then walks out the door. It glows with her magic and then slams behind her. Great. Mission accomplished. Two more ponies think I am a spazz. I roll my eyes. I am exhausted, smell like sweaty horse, and a bit thirsty. The shower upstairs beckons to me, as it promises to cure all those ills.

==============================================================

Lyra grumbled on her way out the door. “Geeze, rude much?” she muttered, as she adjusted the books in her saddlebags.

Bon-Bon looked at her friend. “Lyra, to be fair, you did drop three books on her head. And I think she was a bit irritated before we arrived.”

“That doesn’t mean she should be rude about it!” Lyra said, glaring at Bon-Bon.

Bon-Bon sighed. “That is true, I am just saying that with your,” she paused, “Enthusiasm for your club activities, you weren’t making things any better. I mean, have you thought about talking about something other than the HLC when greeting a new pony as of late?”

“Well, yes..” Lyra rubbed the side of her head. “I just thought, that, well, she might have been interested.”

“Lyra. You think everypony is interested,” Bon-Bon replied. “From what I can tell, she’s a normal pony with some rather odd quirks.”

“Normal pony, Bon-Bon?!” Lyra exclaimed. “She’s downright weird is what she is!” Bon-Bon only replied by rolling her eyes. “She has a hole in her hoof! You got to admit that that’s pretty weird! And-” Bon-Bon elbowed Lyra and cleared her throat. “What?”

Twilight had just turned the corner accompanied by her assistant dragon Spike.

“Ha! Twilight! You’re just the pony that I want to talk to right now,” Lyra began. Bon-Bon just rolled her eyes.

“Why, Hello Heartstrings, Bon-Bon,” Twilight replied, puzzled. “Really? What is-”

“It’s that mare that you have living in your library! Heartbreak!” Lyra said. “You might want to have a talk with her about being nicer to library patrons!”

Twilight’s expression drooped. “What did she...” she shook her head and sighed. If it involved Heartbreak it wasn’t going to be anything good. “Tell me what happened...”

==============================================================

Getting into tub, I pull the shower curtain closed. I sigh. What happened with Lyra could have gone better. It could have gone a lot better. But if my instincts are right about her, she is more than enthusiastic about things. I don’t know what’s going to happen with that mare, but I will just have to adjust my tactics when those bridges come to be burned.

I reach forward and turn the water on. I am grateful that this is the type of shower that has the ‘x’ shaped valves and not round ones. It makes turning the water on so much easier. First comes the hot water and then the cold. I tap a little button on the faucet, and the shower starts up. It’s a shock of cold water at first that steadily warms up. I tap on the valve a bit more making it a bit hotter to my tastes.

I love hot showers, and this one is the first one that I have had in weeks. How sad is that? Back on Earth, I had to take a shower nearly every day. I couldn’t get away with not taking one. If my roommates didn’t complain to take one, I would complain to myself. I push my head into the running water, it feels good. It feels really good. Turning around, I let the water warm up my backside. Progressively, my tail weighs down my butt as it gathers water. I turn back around and just sit in the falling hot water. I look up and open my mouth. I take a drink and it warms me.

“You could have been nicer about things, H.B.” I push my now wet mane out of my face. “It’s not like they know anything about you.” A frown reaches my face. “But what else could you have done? A Human lovers club?! Didn’t see that coming. You just have to stay calm. Play it cool, even if it gets back to Twilight. Particularly if it gets back to Twilight.”

"H.B. can we talk?" Twilight’s voice cuts through my private thoughts like ice. The only thing standing between us is the thin shower curtain.

"Twilight! What the ha-ha-ha-hay! I didn’t hear you come in!!” I jump in shock. “Haven't you ever heard of a thing called privacy?!" I turn away from the sound of her voice, and involuntarily cover myself. Moments later, I am of course, reminded that there isn’t ‘anything’ to cover up. Not unless you count teats. And it’s not like mares have overtly obvious mammary glands.

Twilight jumps back a bit "I didn't think it was that much of an issue. I mean, you didn't mind when I came in your last shower. I even helped you wash your tail!"

I paused trying to remember that event. She did. It was in that first week I was here. "...I wasn't all together there, Twilight. Still, can't we talk after my shower?" I push my face into the running water to clear my mane away from it. Pushing a bit of my forelock out of the way, I see Twilight’s muzzle peeks into the shower

"I don't see what the big deal is, it’s not like you don't have anything I haven't seen before." Twilight says casually.

I jump once again. Involuntarily crossing my legs, well crossing them the best I can. Then I reach forward and push the curtain to try to discourage Twilight from trying to come in any further. ”B-b-b-be as that may, I would rather be in the shower, alone. Thank. You. Very. Much!"

Twilight’s shadow through the curtain gives a rather weirded out look. "Eww."

Why is she giving such a strange look...unless she thinks I want to be alone to...I nearly fall over realizing how that could sound. This very idea sends a wave of nausea over me. "... What...What?! No! Geeze Twilight! No! I just want to shower!"

Twilight’s silhouette regains its composure. "Well, there isn't anything wrong with that sort of thing, H.B., we're both adults. Even if we don't act like it sometimes. Why is being alone in the shower so important anyhow?"

I sigh. This shouldn’t need too much explaining. "It's just...I'm not used to others...being with me while I shower..." I almost bring up the whole ‘I’m naked and wet!’ argument, but then realize that would be pointless. Ponies don’t normally wear clothes. “It’s not the social norm where I am originally from! Showering is commonly done alone!” Fuck, this is a conversation that is never ending.

"Oh. Well there goes my idea of helping you with your shower then, right?" Twilight replies.

My brain glitches over where this conversation could go. A shower scene with Twilight. "Seriously, Twilight. Ew."

Now it’s Twilight's turn to get all squicked out. "What? Heartbreak! No! Geeze!" Revenge would be sweet, but then I remember that I am in the shower, and that this is Twilight Sparkle I am talking to.

"Twilight, seriously. Our conversation can wait till after the shower. It's getting too... weird. The only thing you can help me is with the shower brush. I left it outside of the shower, like an idiot. If you could slip the handle into my ho-" I paused realizing how horrible, ‘my hole’ would sound. "My hoof. I'll finish up washing and then we can talk about what ever it is you want to when I am finished!"

“Fine. But it is going to be over something serious. I just had a talk with Lyra and Bon-Bon.” There is a twitch in her voice. “I think if you are going to continue living in the library, some ground rules are going to be in order.”

I feel the brush handle slip into the hole in my hoof. Twilight didn’t even argue with me about using my hoof like this. Twilight’s hoof beats let me know that she is leaving the bathroom. I grab the shampoo bottle and squirt some on the floofy end of my brush. “Great, I guess I’ll find out what those repercussions are sooner than I wanted to,” I think as I start to work the brush against my coat. “I wonder how long I can stay in the shower before Twilight demands that I get out...”

Comments

[AzureSkies]

“Right...Sorry, Heartbreak,” Lyra says, looking at me. “But, a Human is a mythological race of beings that are said to have lived in Equestria at one time. They walked bipedally all the time, were mostly hairless, had creepy eyes, wore clothes all the time and best of all...” she pulls out a drawing from her saddle bag, “They had hands!”

.....
I thought she was going to say pants...

[Jet_Black1980]

954828 IN MY PANTS!

[Jet_Black1980]

954924 It's story three. There are ten to 11 more stories to be written. If H.B. comes out of her shell, it will be on her own terms.

[Timothy48]

Oh H.B, you poor poor mare. Nopony should have to go through an encounter with 'fannon' Lyra.

[AzureSkies]

954908
images3.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20111008163622/mlpfanart/images/0/0b/Lyra_in_pants_by_egophiliac.png

[TheGreatSako]

I think my overactive imagination enjoyed that shower scene a little too much.

I wonder how HB would feel about that...

[Jet_Black1980]

955454 Disturbed.

[faren455]

whooo fanon Lyra~ I hope she isn't a one time reference!

[dragonlover251]

Great job with Lyra and Bon-bon! Hehe. Bon-bon is probably just like nonstop mentally facehoofing

[McPoopin]

Re-reading because you don't know me - I do what I want, and I was struck with a potentially disturbing thought. What happens with HB's stronger than normal body odors when mating season comes around?

[blazikenking]

955165 I knew that picture would come up in the comments before I saw it.

[Mr Swanky Hat]

I'm wondering when it'll be revealed that he was male

[Snow]

Many images in both this and the previous story are broken links.

[Darkwhip]

I almost want Heartbreak to just ask to become a unicorn or discuss this if she ever gets over the whole earth pony thing, i can imagine her frustration.
Nice job HB! you finally adapted to using your mouth and hooves for things, As a surprise we can switch your tribe to Unicorn, Huzzah!

Also, hoping for Luna shenanigans later as she is mentioned.

[Luckyfanisaac]

They are near the top of the shelf.