This story is a sequel to The Painter
Collab Writer MadDonut
Cover Artist PillowRabbit
Sequel to The Painter
A few days ago my living room needed to be painted.
I really didn’t feel like painting.
Fortunately Fresh Coat, one of the nicest, most beautiful and attractive mares I have ever met, was more than willing to help me out while simultaneously throwing us into a whirlwind of love, pain, and confusion along the way brought on by my pitiful attempts at a one night stand.
I ain’t exactly the… swooziest lover with the slickest tongue if you know what I’m saying...
Chapters will be Published every other week but for those of you who don't want to wait forever Chapter One and Chapter Six are the most corrected ones so far. So for those of you who just want the smut then have at it.
I like how both characters are constantly questioning themselves and what happens to them, it makes them more real.
Shorten your sentences. It's hard to read.
This is a pretty nice story. These two aren't particularly eloquent, but the dialogue is fitting for a pair of normal ponies navigating an awkward-as-heck situation.
It's great so far! You did a good job fleshing out Fresh Coat's personality ^^
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Its so hard to when there's so much action taking place. Trust me tho, in the first bit of chapter six there was almost no full stops within paragraphs. So... I guess it could've been worse~??? But then again it could also be better but who knows. Maybe in the weeks to come we might actually reword and fix it up a bit as we publish the rest of the story. ^^
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Thanks! I think the thing I hate the most is when emotions in certain characters become overly exaggerated to the point where they're unrelatable on any emotional level. Like srs this happens way to often in popular novels and I just laugh most of the time.
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Thanks but when I first proposed a collaboration with P-Berry I first wrote up an entire Character Synopsis on Fresh Coat using only the information provided in his story, 'The Painter.' It got pretty in depth to say the least but its actually where I also came up with Blank Slate's name after referring to the unnamed second person catylist as a blank slate with no emotion or vocal input one too many times.
He really liked the Name to say the least ^^
....love it that chapter should earn it a medal 'streets of broken dreams and dying lives'....
all of our big city's are like that... New York.... Los Angeles... Nashville ( well if you try singing country but still) it's the same
it's sooooooo true God bless Blank Slate!!!! Favorite male pony right there
and his love life is most nice guys love lives 
it's tragic!!! So many feels!!!!
RESISTANCE IS FUTILE AND WILL NOT BE TOLERATED!
GIVE IN TO YOUR BACE DESIGN!
8105105 Heya, much appreciated ^^
That whole passage was heavily inspired by some older Rise Against songs, namely Tip the Scales and The first Drop, but I suppose there's quite a few songs addressing that subject, from a wide variety of different artists, being either about giving up hope or protesting/fighting against this cruel world.
In any case, I'm glad you liked it! ^_^
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Well it's noble and inspirational
Editing job 10/10
This has the spark of the previous chapter and story, but refined, as well!
Where's chapters 3-5?
8116292 every other week buddy. Last week was chapter two so next week on Tuesday will be chapter three. This Tuesday I got something else planned for my latest story so check that out if you wish. Its fairly snide so be careful.
8117422 But why did you write the first two and then jump straight to 6?
8118344 You really wanna wait two or so months? Also the first two chapters to be published was one and six. Two weeks after that you got chapter two.
Can't wait for chapter 3.
Should be "managed to realize."
Great! Keep them coming!
8153065 Thanks dude! Again(Or maybe for the first time) we don't have an editor and the hours leading up to this published chapter was me reading all the way through and making changes and slight edits that I deemed fit. So yea I can see a few mistakes slipping through regardless and I'm not even convinced that the one you mentioned was the only mistake, but again thanks dude!
'Love this story!
Magic... Why do Unicorns never use it in defensive reaction? If Blank would have kept calm he would have been fine, but nope, he panicked and turned into a turtle without a shell.
Another great, if brutal installment. I also want you to know that I'm miffed at Blank Slate, not you, MadDonut. I've written for Unicorns too, and I'm forced to write their actions based on their personalities, not what I think would be the best course of action for them. It hurts me to do it sometimes, considering you always want your star characters to be successful, but I applaud you for it.
Still, that whole dang time I was praying that Blank would remember the horn on his head. Turns out Fresh Coat is better under pressure.
It's a good thing that I forgot most of chapter 6, 'cause I read it without thinking, when there was only chapters 1 and 6.
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I like to imagine that in a city zone the city would have certain laws that place restraints on both Unicorns and Pegisi. The reason for Unicorns is 'cause, although most are nice you gotta keep the sketchy ones in place so any combat magic or manipulation of weaponized objects outside of using your mouth would be highly prohibited. The only magic I would imagine them being aloud to use would be for convince sake like summoning a light source or just opening up doors. Ya know things that wouldn't be considered harmful or manipulative.
For the Pegisi I'd say the whole city would be under a no fly zone beyond ten or fifteen feet as it could cause problems or even be used for malicious intent like perving in on skyscraper bedroom and apartment windows. The only place I'd imagine them being able to fly freely would be in the park where Blank Slate got beat up, I may have even illustrated it without going into depth as it wasn't the main focus.
But yeah, that's just my thought and justification I guess plus to preform magic, its shown that they have to dedicate countess hours simply to preform the simple tasks of levitation early on which is why magic itself has a whole separate education department. However its shown that Blank Slate only works in architecture so you can guess he foregone magical prowess for more 'practical' skills like drawing and building design.
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Glad to hear that, kinda sad that I went dead just before I published the last chapter but it wasn't as if I'd gone depressed or anything, its just that I thought I should strive to start writing independent stories since writing turned out to be a thing I liked. So I took time off from writing Pony Fanfiction simply 'cause, hehe. However I just got back in contact with P-Berry and we discussed chapter five and the potential of this story.
Within that short discussion I suggested we actually add more and reintroduce a previously featured character back into the story after some drama goes down. So, when we start working on this again, we haven't started yet, Chapter six may be marked as non-canonical depending on where the story goes with the insertion of a few or maybe even several new chapters. But trust me, we both think its for the best as we both felt chapter five was rushed and mediocre.
So if you ever keep watch you may just see this story continue onward and delve deeper into itself.
Dis gon get good
O heck
Hell yea! I love it! Now I'm curious where this is going!
Well....... That could have gone better...
Still, Cinnamon Swirl is best character, I think I'm in love.
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Well, glad to hear you guys enjoyed it. I gotta give credit to MadDonut for coming up with that twist at the end though; I was just the typing minion here. Chapter six should be up in a few weeks ^_^
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Glad you like her! Again, props to MadDonut for coming up with her in chapter two, though I'll admit I did take some inspiration for her character from a certain other mature mare in a story you wrote not too long ago ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
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You give everyone but yourself too much credit, Berry.
pre00.deviantart.net/a8ab/th/pre/f/2016/151/b/c/miss_pommel_is_flattered_by_slb94-da4jlgq.png
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Aww you're too kind ^_^
Seriously though, it's people like you that keep me writing. Chapter 6 will be up by tonight.
fresh coat so far seems very... selfish here, i'm going to go out and say it this is where the double standards bites guys in the ass. with all the given data we have, taking emotions out of the situation, the only one who wronged someone here was her. she left a note that was quite clearly misleading, honestly if this where a movie this would probably be the point where one of her friends or an older figure gives her the gears for the situation and then give some words of wisdom. but honestly either way parts like this get to me because the guy says sorry and rarely does the girl have too.
in these situations people often forget it can be harder for most men to verbally voice there feelings, which means in real world terms a situation like this could emotionally destroy a person like blank slate, it's lead to suicide, violent reaction, sometimes hospitalization to a mental hospital. the story is great but i truly hope someone manages to point out at this point at this place in the chapter it goes from every bodies in the wrong, to her being the lion-share of the wrong.
Wasn't this story mature at one point?
Ouch... Well, the night is darkest just before the dawn... This looks pretty dark to me.
For a moment there I had to stop reading for a second because I was so overwhelmed. The fact that they had mixed feelings about each other from the beginning and now the situation just got from awkward to a total misunderstanding. YOU'RE KILLIN' ME with this fluff man I LOVE IT!
Well shit...
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Happens, eh?
Guess things like these can't be averted when feelings are involved.
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Thanks my man, it's highly appreciated! I feel like this part was a little one-sided with Blank Slate, but I'm hoping to make the next one a bit more balanced.
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Yup, I'd say this is just about the darkest part of the whole story. But hey, there's only one way to go when you've hit rock bottom, right?
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It was indeed. However, seeing how the chapter numbers wouldn't match anymore, now that new chapters were added to the original five (plus the NSFW #6) MadDonut and I agreed to take out the (original, NSFW) chapter six for now to re-submit it at a later point, maybe as a separate story altogether, as the rest of the story doesn't really have anything that would require a mature rating.
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Believe it or not, but reading your comment actually made me think, and I do agree with you to some extent. I wouldn't call Fresh Coat selfish in the classical sense, as -in my opinion- her reaction can be blamed on her being deeply emotionally hurt before, but her behavior did seem rather short-sighted in that chapter.
With that in mind, I revised some parts in chapter seven, and ultimately ended up adding enough content to turn it into two separate chapters, just to address how Fresh Coat is coping with this sticky situation the two are in, compared to Blank Slate.
So yeah, stay tuned for chapter 7!
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That's so true.... but damn...
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i'm glad you took that well, i was a little worried something i said might be taken as sexist or something. i enjoy your writing your very good at it and i look forward to reading seven.
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Well, anything can be taken as sexist in those times we're living in, so no worries about that.
Still, glad you're enjoying it so far though.
The painting, the one in a million thing that could have given pause and its a painting. Not bad. Though if it was foreshadowed in someway before the whole encounter with those two characters. I feel it would have added more depth to the chapter. Like the main character enjoyed the painting just cause he felt like it would brighten up the room or something. Still a very good start. I enjoyed how each character constantly questioned themselves especially.
You know, for all his flailing and indecisive actions, I have to give Blank Slate the medal for courage. The guy has no quit in him, and even when he thinks he does, his subconscious won't allow it to stand for very long. It actually very impressive to watch his character development more and more, which the fact that it isn't finished doing so this far into the story shows how deep his soul really is. (And how amazing his Author is
)
Fresh Coat's reminds me of my older sister at some points... Bleh. It's like Cinnamon said: You'll only regret what you don't do. You get hurt by your ambition? So what! The only time a mortal can really fail at anything in life is when they stop trying. Be it love or war, (And those two have a remarkable amount of similarities for how different they supposedly are) you can't let a single defeat stop you from trying again, no matter the pain or fear of another failure.
But, I'm rambling now. Getting closer to the end here is bringing out my retired reviewer personality. I guess what I wanted to say overall was how brilliant the character development has been here. I don't think I've ever seen better then this, and I've seen a lot. Not only that, but this fiction has had a very good moral to it, it taught a lesson as much as it told a story whilst still being that, a story.
I was going to save my praise for the end, but this chapter really just brought out everything good you (And Donut early on) have done with this. This has been a pleasure to read, P-Berry, and thank you very much for finishing it.
Wooop!
I've read this kind of confrontation a thousand times over in non pony and pony related fiction and I'm sure I'll read it plenty more in the future. But it still bothers me to no end how cliche it can be. Almost cringe worthy even. Still though, this chapter was well written none the less.
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Fair enough. If I remember correctly, including the painting was added as a rather spontaneous idea shortly before we finished that chapter. I agree that having Blank Slate mention it before would have been a nice addition, though.
As for 8565718 Yeah, I agree that sort of confrontation is quite a cliché in literature (and any other form of media, really), but frankly, it just seemed like the most obvious choice on how to disrupt whatever confrontation was going on between Blank and Fresh Coat, seeing how she was just about to dump him.
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Man, you just keep brightening up my day with every comment you leave. I'm not even kidding.
I'll try to keep this short, but I'll admit, I'm a little surprised myself looking at how far this story has come. Hell, I never thought we could pull of a sequel to The Painter (as seen in a a message I sent to MadDonut a bit more than a year ago), but well, here we are, looking at what I consider to be one of the most serious and deep stories I've ever had the pleasure of working on.
But seriously, everyone who likes this story should go ahead and thank MadDonut for coming up with the subject of a sequel (and kicking my lazy ass too many times to count) in the first place.
I'm working on the final chapter at the moment, but looking at the expectations it needs to live up to, I feel like editing might take a little longer.
But once again, thank you so much for your kind words!
A stomach bug, a headache from Hell, and learning I had quite literally just completely wasted three full days of work on something?
Somebody up there is looking out for me, because I needed this today more then any other day. I'm angry and sick beyond all reason, but hey, nothing like seeing the story on the very top of my Incomplete Favorites list updating to cheer a person up.
My only regret is I wasted all my reviewer flair on the last comment.
Well, I'll have to settle for saying that the ending was as great as the journey. It was a rollercoaster from start to finish, but the finish was as satisfying as a date that concludes with that storybook ferris wheel scene.
Thank you again for this, P-Berry. And MadDonut, if you see this, thank you just as much.
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Well, I'm always glad to brighten up days, whether intentionally or not
I really do appreciate your feedback though. You wouldn't believe how much the comments people (including you) have left here have influenced the story, not to mention gotten me to be productive for once and bring out the next chapter sooner rather than later.
But in any case, cheesy as it may sound, I value your opinion, and I'm glad you approve of the ending. Past experiences have shown that I tend to take things a little too far in the corniness-department, so I tried to make this ending at least a little more sober. Glad it caught on.
So yeah, that pretty much wraps up this story. The followup (based on Chapter 6) is already written out and should be up once I'm done working on a different story (which might be interesting to you as well) so stay tuned for that ^^
*Inhales Deeply*
WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! *dies* <3
Damn did that ending left me a bit emotional (not literally). Normally I'd be asking a ton of questions since I have so much in mind with this chapter, however I'm just gonna go ahead and say that you soooooooooo much for sharing this story for us P-Berry. You and MadDonut sure know how to put out an extraordinary fic. And when I say extraordinary, I mean just about every definition of that word! Again thank you so much!
Edit 12/6/17: I just realized that Fresh Coat made an cameo appearance in "Spice Up Your Life." And I'm here sitting in front of my laptop thinking, "Wow, I did not see that coming."
vignette.wikia.nocookie.net/mlp/images/6/67/Fresh_Coat_ID_S6E12.png/revision/latest?cb=20160611223615
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Thank you for the feedback and the kind words!
And by all means, if you have any questions, feel free to throw them my way. I'll gladly answer what I can!
And to be honest, I didn't think too much about it when I first saw her in that episode. It were the amazing images drawn by fandom artists (namely Weasselk and Shinodage) that sparked my interest in her, and led me to write The Painter. The rest, as they say, is history.
i still; have to point out considering she has the details the 'he hurt me' line is selfish and hollow, kinda wish cinnamon had been mare enough to point it out.
frankly well the story is great, your lack of having fresh coat get called out for her actions is unhealthy, for blank and for fresh coat.
your sense of self worth has a harder time building up strength if there is nothing to fight against and even lose against. your characters are greatly sculpted and your story is great but fresh coats karma Houdini kinda ruins the feel. yes you had cinnamon tell her to get her head out of her ass, but no one kinda underlines the borderline hypocritical way she handles the situation, i'll say again given the situation blank didn't actually hurt her. the only one hurting fresh coat in the situation given if fresh coat. honestly this story suffers only for that minor flaw in character, i get you wanted the whole internal monologue self loathing thing, but it still comes across poorly that none of her friends cared about her enough to point out that she is the source of her own misery and someone else's, i'll give cinnamon did that, but not the degree it needed..
The drama in here, it was pretty much picturesque. Seriously, it was so thick you were able to cut it with a knife. Good thing that the both of them had Cinnamon to get their heads out of their plots.
Either way, this was an enjoyable read, so thank you for that!
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I see your point, although I respectfully disagree. I personally haven't (and I hope neither have you) experienced what it's like being left at the altar, but I suppose it's safe to say that it'll hurt you on a level invisible to most.
With that said, I get that Fresh Coat comes across as selfish at certain parts - and that's wholly intentional, really. But I actually do think that it was Blank (and to an equal extent Cinnamon) who hurt her in this situation. Maybe not directly hurting her, but causing her to hurt which, to someone like her, can be equally bad.
Like I said, I see your point, but I wouldn't go so far as to say that it can all be blamed on her - she was in the wrong at parts, no doubt, but in the end I don't think one can blame it all on her.
But of course, everyone has different experiences and expectations and thus will react differently to certain topics in the story , and if to you it felt like Fresh Coat is the source of her own suffering, then I'm in no position to tell you that you're wrong.
But regardless, thank you for reading the story and leaving feedback. It's highly appreciated
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Thanks dude. I'm glad you liked it!