Our job is not to give readers what they want; our job is to show them things they never imagined. --Walt Williams
When Twilight suggests she and Rainbow Dash visit an old crime scene, Rainbow leaps at the opportunity. Murders, mystery, drama, action -- who doesn't love that? It's sure to be a riveting story for the ages.
Sadly for Rainbow Dash, bad puns ensue.
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I didn't knew that Twilight had such Pungeon Master instincts on her! Poor Rainbow...
vignette2.wikia.nocookie.net/wingsoffire/images/7/70/Twilight_sparkle_yes.gif/revision/latest?cb=20140321232216
No jury would convict Rainbow if she murdered Twilight
Okay, THAT was hilarious!
Also, the end there reminded me of a joke i heard once for some reason.
There's a doctor that, when he finishes his shift every day, goes downtown to a bar he knows and orders a low-alcohol almond daiquiri. However, eventually the owner/bartender runs out of almonds and instead substitutes with hickory nuts. So the doctor tries that and said "Hey, this is different. What is this?"
So the guy smiles and says "Why, it's a hickory daiquiri, Doc."
7872834 Eleventh.
Well that was an interesting prank idea for Twilight to play on RD
*Sniff-sniff* That smelled kind of pungent.
This is the kind of murder scene you drag your friends to when you've just discovered what fun is and you want to convince them that you can be fun.
And then they stab you.
Would that be at Ten Pun Bowling?
The crime scene they're actually visiting is the one from what Rainbow's gonna do to Twilight if she cracks one more pun.
7873164
I don't know. But I'm pretty sure that near the end Rainbow was going spare.
I've never rolled is. Just real, rational integers.
...Dang. You beat me to it.
ALL OF MY HATE
And also five moustaches:
Those puns... they were terrible, but great story!
As soon as I saw the rice field, I could guess what the final pun was, but I had not expected all the ones along the way.
"And I apologize if no pun in ten did."
......*slow standing clap*
*standing ovation*
I...
I didn't know there were puns in there. I didn't see any of them until I read it again.
I'm sorry.
You're a terrible pony.
Well done.
Twilight.
Twiliiiiiiiight.
You’re doing it wrong. If you're going to make puns at a crime scene, you're supposed to punctuate them by putting on sunglasses and then cutting to the opening credits.
7877772
That was...
(puts on sunglasses)
Punderful.
7879018
Well, that was punfull
Is the actual killer sheep still on the lamb?
it's got mutton to do with us.
Having a sheep be the killer is shear genius.
All's wool that ends wool.
These puns are baaaaa'd.
So, on the rock farm, everypony had to learn to give orders to Morris, the male sheep. That's why Pinkie Pie is so ram-dom.
I have reviewed this HERE.
mybrainhurts
I'm not totally sure what the first pun was a play on. "He who hesitates is lost?" And was the "bogus scriers" one supposed to be "only you can prevent forest fires"?
"Small medium at large" and "kneaded the dough badly" made me laugh, but I feel like Twilight's puns got worse from there, which I guess just puts you in the horseshoes of Rainbow Dash.
Typos:
"went to meet her while she was working out her," - *Here
"but run she could bolt," - Um, I think you meant *Before she could bolt.
In the words of Dash: I hate you so much right now. And Twilight deserves to be executed for such stuff...grrrr....
And this:
"I apologize if no pun in ten did."
Why, Author?? Why did you do this??
And as if my brain didn't already hurt enough, the comments....oh they made it worse. Especially this one:
[[Is the actual killer sheep still on the lamb?
it's got mutton to do with us.
Having a sheep be the killer is shear genius.
All's wool that ends wool.
These puns are baaaaa'd.
So, on the rock farm, everypony had to learn to give orders to Morris, the male sheep. That's why Pinkie Pie is so ram-dom.]]
Please, somebody....put me out of my misery...
*ten minutes and two tylenol later*
Where was I?....
Oh, right....
This was SO bad, but so very, very punny...
Loved it!!!!!
I applaud you.
You motherfucker.
I feel like you just punched me in the gut. Repeatedly.
The only one that didn't click was the levitation one. The one in the author's note though put the ugliest of grins on my face.
This is what happens when somebody tells a tale of true crime and punishment.
I'm completely sure that you wrote this entire story just to make the pun in the author's note. Well done.
I'm so dumb that I only understood the last one (author's note).
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Booze Booze 🤪 (get it?)
I'm gonna have to remember that one.
This story was
I cannot believe I actually laughed while reading this.
Poor Rainbow Dash is gonna need some serious headache medicine from all the self-inflicted horseshoe shaped dents in her head.
PPPUUUNNNNNNNNNNSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!
Those puns were bad. Like, really bad. Not in any good way.
No.
It's the kind where your can tell where the pun is, because sentence is unnatural and bent to fit the pun, but pun is just so bad, you don't even understand it.
At least the setup for the final punchline is done right. No matter how stupid it is.
The were, perhaps, three good jokes. The rest I refuse to call puns. It isn't clever to expect people to guess a different sentence hidden because of the similar structure, forced usage and the letters matching between words, making them sounds vaguely the same.