Pinkie Gets Schooled

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Comments ( 11 )

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Easy breezey

Easy breezey #1 · Jan 7th, 2017 · 1 · ·

Wow pinkie you you... I'm not even gonna say it

MythrilMoth

MythrilMoth #2 · Jan 7th, 2017 · 3 · 2 ·

OK, let's break it down:

- Your title is kinda lackluster.
- Your description is terribly boring.
- The plot of this story is cringeworthy, cliched, and uninspired. Heavy emphasis on cringeworthy.
- Your writing is rushed and sloppy.

On a scale of 0 to 100, I'd give this story a 4.

DryvernX

DryvernX #3 · Jan 7th, 2017 · 1 · ·

The plot is decent at best, yet could be better. Just too bad it's not as long as I hoped.

andrizzi

andrizzi #4 · Jan 7th, 2017 · 2 · ·

"I failed the test last week, and I really need some extra credit."

I was really hoping that you wouldn't have gone for that. It's just too cliche.

Besides that, it fullfills its work as a clopfic.

Comment posted by rainbowdashismywaifu deleted Jan 8th, 2017

andrizzi

andrizzi #6 · Jan 7th, 2017 · 1 · ·

7850194 Sorry, I didn't mean that I disliked it.

It actually has pretty good standards. The spacing is proper, the grammar is right, I saw no typo, and you also did a really good paragraphing. What I mean is, your writing is solidly good.

And believe me, I've read some s*** that would make you cringe on the spot. Fics that the capitalization wrong, for example. How can a writer not notice that?

The problem is the plot. It's waaay too cliche, only good for porn. Personally I would say that's ok for this particular fic (since it clearly is a porn one-shot), it's just that it's not really interesting. At all. It's like opening a video on YouPorn, you'll just skip half video to get on the sex part. If you want to write clop about MLP you have to make it fit the context. Also, it was kinda useless to describe the professor character if you're never going to use him in the future.

I see that this is your first fic, and I don't know if you wrote this just to make practice. My bet is that you did and, even if you didn't, it was a more than decent first attempt. Ask yourself on what you focused yourself when you were writing this, see what you did right or wrong and try to learn something. Seconds shots usually work better.

verypeeved

verypeeved #7 · Jan 11th, 2017 · · ·

7850419

I saw no typo

i don't think you're the person who should be spellchecking this...

andrizzi

andrizzi #8 · Jan 11th, 2017 · · ·

7858326 I saw no typos?

nightmaster0

nightmaster0 #9 · Feb 14th, 2017 · · ·

Great lemon. Any chance of seeing more? Maybe Pinkie could help him form a harem.

Mehter6

Mehter6 #10 · Nov 20th, 2018 · 1 · ·

While the story IS good, I am kind of disappointed in myself.

Let me explain. This isn't porn, it teeters on the edge of rape but not quite. It took advantage of an innocent character and I feel bad even jerking off to it and came. But the clop is good though. 10/10. It's just my consciousness that's preventing me from embracing it. So nothing wrong on your side, just my self having difficulties. Although I suppose if you ever make another one(?), Make characters Atleast enjoy it, don't you think?

Sun Fire