Chapter 3
Twilight Sparkle awoke to the twin unpleasantries of a splitting headache and a mouth that tasted like death warmed over. She kept her eyes firmly shut, though, almost as though she could stave off the day if only she didn’t have to see the sun's morning rays. But then, just as her headache reached the point where she decided she’d have to venture to the kitchen for some nice, soothing tea, a loud bang sounded from somewhere down below. Instantly Twilight’s eyes flew open in dismay.
After all, she was a librarian. She knew the unmistakable and unforgivable sound of a book being dropped when she heard it.
With a heavy groan, the unicorn stumbled out of bed. She glanced around her loft but didn’t spot anything amiss or see anyone except for her still-slumbering assistant. She tried to fight back a frown but quickly lost the battle.
Except for Spike, she was alone in her bedroom.
But that was all right. That was … fine, really. It was, in fact, precisely how it had always been and precisely as it should be. Everything was fine. Except, of course, for the ruckus downstairs. Or was it more of a fracas?
Still frowning, Twilight tiptoed past Spike and headed for the stairs. The banging from the first floor of the library grew louder with every step she took, and through the haze of pain and drowsiness Twilight wondered why her library thief couldn’t have at least chosen a decent hour of the morning to stage a robbery. As she climbed downstairs, she muttered under her breath, “Just plain rude and inconsiderate …”
She trotted over to the non-fiction section, grumbling all the while, and grabbed a large dictionary with her magic along the way. It was large enough and heavy enough, she figured, to serve as a good projectile weapon, should the need arise. Always better to be prepared, after all. That was Twilight’s motto. But as soon as she spotted her intruder, she froze. Then, very gently, she set the dictionary down on a nearby table.
Confusion warred with hope within her chest, creating an unpleasant tightness that felt like somepony pulling on a tied knot, and she wasn’t at all sure what to say. Finally, with just a touch of hesitation, Twilight called out, “Pinkie Pie?”
Pinkie Pie didn’t so much as flinch.
“C’mon, Pinkie,” Twilight repeated, sighing a bit and rubbing her aching forehead with a hoof. “Do you have any idea whatsoever what time it is?”
Still the earth mare didn’t look away from the bookshelves, where she was busy grabbing books off the shelves and tossing them over her shoulder. “Nopey dopey! But I haven’t gotten that tingly feeling in my left back hoof that tells me the sun’s coming up, so I’d guess it’s still pretty early!” She frowned at one book for a few seconds, her eyes flicking over its pages quickly, before she shook her head and threw it down on the floor with the rest. “I kinda sorta thought you’d still be asleep for a few more hours, actually. I mean, you were up pretty late last night, Twilight!”
“I was asleep,” Twilight retorted, rolling her eyes, “until a certain somepony woke me up with all of her banging around down here.”
“Oh, that’s not very nice!” Pinkie shot the unicorn a sympathetic glance over her shoulder, as she took yet another book from the shelf. “You should probably ask her to stop.”
Twilight didn’t even bother to sigh this time. Instead, she reached out with a tendril of magic and snatched away the book Pinkie was holding, before it too could fall victim to the pink pony. “What are you looking for, anyways? I am a librarian, you know, and if you had simply asked I could have helped you--”
She fell silent the very instant she saw the title of the book she now held within her grasp: The Life and Theories of Starswirl the Bearded. Carefully, reverently, she placed the book down on the table, right next to the dictionary, and then trotted over to Pinkie Pie. Leaning down, she began inspecting all of the books that now littered the library floor.
The Spells of Starswirl. The Collected Lessons of Clover the Clever. Magical Alchemy: Potions and Practice. And more--so many more, books about every conceivable kind of magic, biographies of all of the most renown wizards in Equestrian history, on and on and on.
By the time Twilight glanced back up, Pinkie Pie had stepped away from the bookshelves. The earth pony was staring down at the floor and shuffling her hooves a bit. “I guess I kinda made a bit of a mess, huh?” she murmured, with a weak little giggle. “Sorry about that, Twilight. I’ll get it all cleaned up, promise!”
“Why?” The unicorn’s voice came out as quick and as loud as whip crack, much louder than she’d intended. “Why … why these books? Why magic?”
At that, Pinkie looked up, those bright blue eyes even more intense than usual. The earth pony smiled at her, but it wasn’t like any Pinkie Pie smile that Twilight had ever before seen. Most of Pinkie’s smiles were breezy, careless, like a whisper on the wind. But the smile that Twilight was seeing now … it was focused, as focused as a telescopic lens trained on a faraway star. As determined as Rainbow Dash or Applejack during the Running of the Leaves. And, somewhere deep in Pinkie’s smile, there was a bit of mischief, a hint of challenge.
“You know why, Twilight,” said Pinkie, her smile never wavering, “or … or, at least, I hope you know.”
The unicorn simply stood there for a few moments, her body completely locked in place and utterly still even as her mind raced. Even had she wanted to, she didn’t think she would be able to tear her gaze away from those spellbinding eyes in front of her or that beautifully, brilliantly defiant smile.
Finally, and just a bit nervously, Twilight returned the other pony’s smile with one of her own. “Actually, Pinkie? I think you’re right. I think I do know.”
Pinkie Pie gave a nod, as though something important had just been decided between the two of them. “I just knew you’d be able to figure it out.” Then, with a wink, she added, “After all, you’re the biggest smarty smart-pants unicorn in Equestria!”
“You should stay for breakfast.” The words were out of Twilight’s mouth before she could think them over or second-guess them. “Please stay. I’ll--I’ll cook us something. Or, um, Spike will cook. Just … stay.”
Pinkie’s smile softened into a gentle grin. “Okie dokie lokie.”
“Why?” the farmer asked, with a tiny frown. Meanwhile, the weather pony simply gave a single, approving nod.
Why her? was what the farmer meant.
“Because,” the unicorn replied, thoughtfully, slowly. But Applejack just kept on frowning, while Rainbow stared at her blankly.
So Twilight sighed, and she tried again. She explained to her friends how endlessly patient Pinkie was with all her faults and all her mistakes. How Twilight had underestimated the pink earth pony at least a hundred times, and Pinkie had forgiven her at least a hundred and one. Really, Twilight was still just a student--at magic, at friendship, at life--and she needed somepony who could be patient with her as she stumbled forward and tried to find her way. All it took was one utterance of “I’m sorry” and, no matter the extent of the crime, Pinkie was all smiles and absolution.
Applejack and Rainbow Dash seemed to accept this.
And it was true what Twilight said, all of it, but it wasn’t the truth. It wasn’t the real reason why.
Applejack gritted her teeth and glowered at the smug blue pegasus in front of her. Out here on the path, without any trees to provide shade, the sun beat down much too hot, and she could feel beads of sweat trickle down her face. Reaching up to give her hat a good, firm tug, she muttered, “I don’t think you wanna be doin’ this, RD.”
“That so, pardner?” Dash’s eyes darted over to some nearby bushes before returning to focus on Applejack. “Well, I think you oughta be nicer to Fluttershy!”
The earth pony fought back the urge to roll her eyes. “Oh, hush yer yappin’. I’m plenty nice to Fluttershy.”
The nearby bushes gave a rustle. Neither pony paid them any mind, however, preferring to maintain their angry stare-down.
“Well?” said Applejack, finally. “What are ya gonna do, big talker? You gonna deck me or somethin’?”
Rainbow’s eyes narrowed dangerously.
Applejack chuckled a bit. “Naw, I don’t think yer gonna deck me. Ain’t got the guts.”
In an instant, Dash was right there, snout to snout with her, those pink eyes sparking and flashing in silent warning. Applejack could feel Rainbow’s hot, spicy-smelling breath on her face as her friend panted and snarled. After several long, tense moments, the pegasus sighed and took a step back.
“Forget it. You’re not worth it,” she spat, turning her back to the farmer. “Besides, ‘Shy would never forgive me if I hurt you.”
It was then that Applejack whirled around, lifted her hind legs, and bucked Rainbow Dash right in the head.
With a loud groan, Rainbow crumpled to the ground, and Applejack glanced over to the bushes that sat right along the road and bit her lower lip. Just as she’d expected, the bushes suddenly exploded as a blur of yellow came hurtling out, scooping up Dash almost before she’d even hit the dirt. Applejack tiredly sat down right in the middle of the road and used her hat to wipe the sweat from her brow.
“Oh, Rainbow! My poor Rainbow!” Fluttershy was hovering all around, gently poking at her fellow pegasus, looking for injuries, visibly frantic with worry and concern.
Rainbow bore it all with a rare, quiet patience. “It’s okay, ‘Shy! I’m totally fine. She didn’t even clock me that hard.”
Applejack snorted, and Dash tossed her a quick glare.
At the sound of the earth pony’s snort, Fluttershy glanced over as well, and her usually gentle eyes burned like the center of the sun. “You should be ashamed of yourself, Applejack! Kicking Rainbow Dash when she had her back turned!”
“Yep.” Applejack nodded affably. “Mighty low and dirty of me.”
“I hope you’ll apologize later, but right now …” The feathered nursemaid turned towards her newest patient again. Instantly those teal eyes were back to being all kindness and calm. “Right now, I have to get Rainbow back to my cottage so I can treat her and make sure she doesn’t have a concussion.”
As Fluttershy led the other pegasus away, insisting on having Dash lean on her for support, Applejack watched in silence. A few steps down the road, Rainbow Dash turned her head and gave the farmer a none-too-subtle wink paired with a huge smile. But Applejack waited until the two pegasi had disappeared completely from view before she finally gave in to that urge to roll her eyes, which by then was too strong to resist any longer.
A few seconds later, she heard the soft clop of hooves from behind. She didn’t bother looking over, as she knew full well who it was. “This was the stupidest idea either of ya have ever had. And both y'all have had plenty o’ stupid ideas over the years.”
“Maybe!” came the maddeningly perky reply. “But it totally, totally worked, didn’t it?”
“I reckon,” Applejack admitted with more than a bit of reluctance, unable to keep the sour note from her voice. “Still, I’m the one who Fluttershy’s gonna be mad at. Celestia only knows when she’ll forgive me.”
“Don’t be silly! Fluttershy doesn’t ever stay mad for long.” Pinkie Pie threw her fore legs around the farmer’s neck and hugged tightly. “Besides, I’m sure Dashie will explain everything.”
Applejack was significantly less sure of that. She wouldn’t bet the farm on Rainbow Dash explaining everything. In fact, she wasn’t so sure that she’d bet a single apple on Dash doing that. But aloud all she said was, “I sure hope you're right.”
“Aw, c’mon, AJ! Cheer up! We did a really great thing for our friends today.” And then, Pinkie’s voice dropped low and surprisingly soft, as she added, “And now … now we’ve all even Stevens.”
Applejack swallowed and turned to glance at Pinkie. Blue eyes met green, and for a moment, just a moment, the two earth ponies understood one another perfectly. Neither of them mentioned a stagecoach chase through the desert surrounding Dodge Junction. Neither of them mentioned a promise kept in word but broken in spirit. Neither of them had to.
Rather than dredging up what was well and past, Applejack simply gave her friend a rough nod. “Glad to hear that, Pink. I don’t like havin’ red on my ledgers.”
With a soft sigh, Pinkie Pie disengaged from her stranglehold, and at the sound of the sigh, Applejack gazed at her fellow earth pony with a confused frown on her face. Pinkie gave her a sad little smile in return.
“And now I’m all even Stevens with Rainbow Dash, too,” Pinkie explained, her eyes hooded and cagey, the way they always looked when there was something the pink pony wasn’t admitting.
But Applejack decided not to ask exactly what Pinkie meant by that. It wasn’t as though she’d ever get a satisfactory answer, anyway. She never did. Instead, she simply replied, “Glad to hear it, sugar cube.”
And she was glad, too. Whatever was going on between Pinkie and Dash, Applejack was happy to know that all was apparently well. It always made her stomach hurt a bit when she had to witness her family fighting--and these ponies were her family, just as much as her siblings and her granny. When they were happy, Applejack was happy. It was as simple as that.
Suddenly, Pinkie Pie perked up and grinned, a big, wide grin that nearly split her face right in two. It was precisely the kind of grin that the farmer had learned to dread. “You know, Applejack ... we could always figure out a way for you to get a fillyfriend, too.”
“No.”
“Aww!” Pinkie’s grin dropped into a pout. “Not even a super pretty and super talented and super generous pony who can make the bestest dresses ever?”
Applejack scowled darkly, even as a faint blush stole across her cheeks. “Definitely no.”
“Why?” the fashion designer asked, with a high, tinkling laugh, as the animal caretaker merely looked on with confusion and worry written all over her face.
Why her? was what they both meant.
“Because,” the other unicorn replied, with expectant, hopeful eyes. But after a few final chuckles, Rarity said that she still didn’t understand.
So Twilight shook her head and, with a sympathetic little smile, she tried again. She explained that she needed somepony who wouldn’t take her as seriously as she sometimes took herself. Somepony to remind her how to laugh, how to smile, especially when the skies were dark and gray. Somepony who would bake a cake decorated to look like a giant stack of books, for no other reason than to bring a grin to the face of a reclusive, overworked librarian. Somepony who could see the loneliness lurking in the heart of a near-total stranger and know a surprise party was just what that lonely pony needed, even if the stranger hadn’t realized that herself.
Rarity and Fluttershy seemed to accept this.
And it was true what Twilight said, all of it, but it wasn’t the truth. It wasn’t the real reason why.
There was a time when, if one had asked Twilight Sparkle whether she ever expected to be hanging upside down from an apple tree while holding a basket of water balloons in her mouth, Twilight would have answered, very sensibly, that of course she didn’t. That time, however, was a time that had passed into the long-gone mists of memory. It was a time that existed before Ponyville meant anything more to Twilight than a tiny dot on a map, and it was a time that existed before Twilight had ever known an excitable pink earth pony named Pinkamena Diane Pie.
Still hanging upside down from the tree, Twilight wondered exactly where and how her life went so very, very off the rails. And, as she pondered over it all, she couldn’t help but grin, careful to keep a grip on the basket as she did so.
It might have been when she first landed in town and allowed Spike to talk her into trying to make friends with the locals. It might have been when she ventured into the Everfree Forest with five annoyingly persistent ponies hot on her heels. It might have been that impulsive, drunken, wonderful kiss. She doubted that she’d ever be able to pinpoint a single, precise moment, really. It was frustrating to realize that and, also, somewhat strangely exhilarating.
“Get ready, Twi!” hissed a voice from above, practically bubbling over with infectious joy. “I think I see Applejack heading this way!”
The apple tree and water balloons, though … this was something that Twilight did know about. Indeed, she could easily identify the very beginning of this entire terrible, misbegotten scheme. It had started with baking. That very morning, Pinkie Pie had burst into the library and all but kidnapped Twilight. Spike had apparently let slip that he was getting a bit tired doing all the cooking and baking for the two of them, and Pinkie had decided this was a perfect opportunity to provide her unique brand of helpfulness.
They’d started with cookies. Cookies were easy, Pinkie had said. Cookies were foal’s play.
The cookies had come out black as coal.
From there, they had progressed to muffins, then cakes, and on to biscuits and scones. Black. Burnt. Inedible. Each and every batch. Twilight had felt herself sinking into a mild depression as the baking lessons progressed, and that old, sick feeling had started churning in her stomach.
Failure. Lazy. Incompetent. Good for nothing, terrible, awful--
“Mmm! Crispy!”
At that, Twilight had glanced up, only to find Pinkie’s face just inches away. Pinkie had smiled at her, big and bright, and in response the unicorn had simply swallowed a sniffle.
“I like how crunchy these are,” Pinkie had declared, indiscriminately spraying crumbs as she spoke. “Reminds me of rock candy back on the farm, which we always made with real rocks, 'cause that's the only way to make it. This is pretty good for your first time making cupcakes!”
Twilight had blinked. “You can’t be serious.”
“Twilight Sparkle!” A patented Pinkie gasp echoed throughout the room, loud and exaggerated. Just like the one that had greeted Twilight when she first set hoof in Ponyville. “You should know better than that, silly filly. Pinkie Pie is always serious about cupcakes!”
Twilight hadn’t replied. Instead, she’d simply looked into those eyes in front of her, those huge blue eyes, and in those eyes she’d seen nothing but utter seriousness. Utter sincerity. And an utterly insane belief that these cupcakes were not the most wretched cupcakes ever known throughout all of ponydom.
Twilight Sparkle had laughed. After all, what else could she do? She had laughed long and hard, until she was practically gasping for breath, and Pinkie had laughed along with her. Finally, Twilight had gotten control over herself and, after she had, she’d found that her eyes didn’t sting anymore and her stomach didn’t hurt.
Which was not something that could likely be said about Pinkie’s stomach, however, as Pinkie had been playing taste tester all morning. It was then that Twilight had suggested that perhaps Pinkie could try to teach her something that didn’t involve baking.
In the present moment, as she began to feel light-headed from hanging upside down for so long, Twilight wondered whether it might not have been a better idea to have stuck with the baking. At least she wasn’t likely to break her neck while baking--though she had to admit that, out here in the orchards, she was less likely to inadvertently poison somepony than she had been back at Sugarcube Corner. But it was all academic, anyway, as here she was. For better or worse.
“You gotta wait for the right moment,” whispered Pinkie, her voice vibrating with excitement. “You gotta feel the water balloons, Twilight. You gotta believe in the water balloons. You gotta be one with the water balloons.”
If she hadn’t had her mouth full with the handle of the basket, Twilight might have shot off a retort. She settled for rolling her eyes as hard as she could, instead.
“Ooh, she’s almost here! On the count of three!”
This really was an awful idea. Twilight picked up a heavy, water-laden balloon with her magic.
“Three …”
Not to mention a completely juvenile idea, at that. She squinted a bit, so as to get better aim.
“Two …”
At least it was a warm day. Who knew? Maybe Applejack would even enjoy a bit of cool water, given how hard the farmer always worked. Still squinting, Twilight positioned her balloon in hopes of hitting Applejack’s hat. She had to bite back a giggle, for fear of giving away their position.
“One!”
The water balloon flew through the air, end over end, much like a beanbag lobbed underhoofed. Twilight’s aim proved a bit off, however, and the balloon splattered directly in Applejack’s face. Immediately the orange pony reared back in startlement and began shaking her head. Then, taking off her hat, she used it to mop the water off her face while grumbling.
“Pinkie! Rainbow! Consarn it!” Applejack wrung out her hat and set it back atop her head. Huffing, she glared up into the tree where her two attackers still lurked. “You two had better hope that y’all have--Twilight?”
Twilight grinned and gave the earth pony an embarrassed little wave. Speaking through her teeth, which still firmly held onto the balloon basket, she muttered to her co-conspirator, “Um, Pinkie Pie? What are we supposed to do now?”
“Oh, that’s easy peasy!” Pinkie’s giggles came so hard and so loud that they shook the entire tree. “Now? Now, we run!”
And that was precisely what the two ponies did.
Unfortunately, despite Twilight’s magic and Pinkie’s speed, Applejack was able to catch them before they were able to escape Sweet Apple Acres--and the farmer swiftly and mercilessly obtained vengeance through dunking the two ponies in the farm water trough. But even after the dunking, even after both ponies surfaced from the trough sopping wet, neither could stop giggling. After a beat or two of silence and her sternest glare, Applejack gave in and began chuckling too.
“Why?” the baker asked, her voice cheerful but curious.
Why me? was what she meant.
“Because,” the unicorn replied, leaning forward and smiling softly.
They lay on a blanket spread out atop a grassy hill just outside of Ponyville. The blanket was weighed down by countless dishes, full of sandwiches and side dishes, pies and cookies. And cupcakes--ridiculous, absurd heaps of cupcakes. Above the two ponies hung Luna’s moon, glowing softly. It was a perfect night, a perfect picnic. A perfect moment that the two ponies had decided to steal, just for themselves, as in the morning Twilight would take the train to Canterlot. Tomorrow Twilight would return to her hometown, to visit her parents and talk about … well, just what the elder Sparkles wanted to discuss was something that neither pony knew.
Twilight had been nervous about it, of course. Was still nervous about it. It had been Pinkie who’d suggested the picnic. Picnics were relaxing, the earth pony had reasoned, and besides, picnics had food. And who didn’t like food? Twilight hadn’t been able to refute the other pony’s logic. She wouldn’t have done so, even if she could have. But still the anxiety gnawed at her and stole away her hunger.
She shoved down her nervousness as best as she was able. Tomorrow she could worry--would worry--but tonight … tonight was for laughter. Tonight was for magic. Tonight was for them.
“Because, Pinkie Pie,” Twilight repeated, enunciating very carefully and deliberately. "Just because."
“Really?” Pinkie returned the other pony’s smile, blue eyes sparkling, laughing. She rested her head on Twilight’s shoulder, and her mane tickled Twilight’s nose. “Me, too! I mean, that’s my reason too.”
And it was the truth.
The grandfather clock ticked loudly from its prominent position in the large, elegant living room. On the other side of the room, Twilight sat on her parents’ couch. Her mother and father stood just a few feet away, the both of them just staring at her, not speaking. The room was stiflingly hot, just as it always was and always had been. Twilight waited in excruciating, agonizing silence for her parents to begin the conversation that she was dreading with every fiber of her being.
They had heard. They knew. They knew about Pinkie … about her and Pinkie. Twilight wasn’t sure just why she was so shocked by this, but she was. She supposed that she simply thought that Ponyville was small enough and far enough away that anything that happened there wouldn’t be of any notice to the ponies in the grand royal city. But she should have known that it would be different for a protege of the princess. For the scion of the Canterlot Sparkles.
She should have known. She should have remembered.
“Why?” her father asked at last, his voice perfectly calm and pleasant and his face absolutely stony and still.
Why are you doing this? was what he meant. Why are you doing this to us?
Twilight swallowed over the thick lump in her throat. Willed herself to not break eye contact. And then, in a voice quiet with determination, she replied, “Because.”
Both her parents frowned at that. And as they frowned, as their eyes betrayed that all too familiar hint of confusion and disappointment, Twilight found that any further explanation she might have offered died instantly on her lips. Instead of explaining, she simply took a sip of the tea that sat on her mother’s expensive but tasteful side table. As she sipped at the tepid tea, she tried to ignore how sickeningly quick her heart was beating. The silence stretched between the three unicorns like a thin, sharp wire, and Twilight thought she might just throw up then and there.
“That is an absurd thing to say, Twilight,” was all her mother said, when finally she spoke. The elder mare gave her head a gentle shake, a gesture which hurt more than any Ursa Major attack ever could.
A moment later, her father asked about her studies, and immediately Twilight leapt at the chance handed to her and began rambling off facts and figures, places and names. All of the recent lessons she’d learned and all of the new spells she’d practiced, anything and everything that didn’t directly involve a certain pink baker. The words just tumbled out of her like a rushing river as she kept talking at a desperate rate, her gaze intent upon her parents’ faces. Slowly but surely, that glint of disappointment faded from their eyes. Slowly, the smiles returned to both their faces.
And it was true what Twilight said, all of it, but it wasn’t the truth.
It wasn’t the truth that mattered.
Why?
Why did you improve so much? is what i mean
the first chapter was ok, the second one was pretty good, but this? I cann't even say how much i liked this chapter. Bravo
the only thing i didn't like is the Rarijack and the Rainbowshy
Why?
Why do authors always try to ship each of the mane 6 with each other? is what i wonder
A beautiful story indeed.
890134
It's classic. I've had my Mane 6 ships since about episode 4 of season one, and haven't changed them since.
Wow.
This chapter is phenomenal.
The pacing, the common theme, just everything. You captured it perfectly.
Well done. I can't wait for more.
Beautiful man, very poetic. It's nice to see such experimentation with style and storytelling.
890134
Why?
Why do authors always try to ship each of the mane 6 with each other? is what i wonder
Just because, brah. Just because.
890134
> Why do authors always try to ship each of the mane 6 with each other? is what i wonder
Readers already care about the mane six, at least a very large percent of them care a lot more about the mane six than any other characters, especially OCs.
If you want to ship an already well loved character with a character considerably less well loved, you need to make your audience love them just as much. Otherwise why do I care about the story? If it's just a random introduction into romance, it's not too interesting. Make me love the pony first!
That's my guess at least
MORE DAMMIT MOAR
890685
I think his question is actually "why do authors try to ship all six of the mane six in the same story". But I could be wrong.
You arrive a few minutes late, and everyone takes all the witty answers.
Gotta say, I really like your narrative style.
As someone with a certain habit for being kicked in the head, I gotta admit, Rainbow sure must reaaaaly like Shy, haha.
Nice chapter! I found the path it looks like you were taking Twi's parents down interesting. It's a role I'm not sure I've ever seen them play!
Okay.
There are a lot of things to love about the TwiPie here. A lot of things. But you know what? The TwiPie can wait a minute, because that FlutterDash needs to be mentioned and there's less of it to talk about. Why does it need to be mentioned? Because it is glorious. I absolutely love the idea that Pinkie and Dash would go through this incredibly elaborate plan that involves Dashie being deliberately kicked in the head by the strongest pony around just to get Dash and Shy some alone time. And maybe so that Dash can be gushed over a bit - I can't help thinking that was also part of Dash's plan. Though that, of course, was the part she didn't tell Pinkie.
It fits perfectly, I think, and even though it breaks my heart forever I love that Pinkie helped Dash with her ridiculously circuitous plan - even though she loved Dashie once and still does because I have to believe that, she's perfectly happy to help her win someone else, without a hint of regret. A lot of that is because she has Twi now, I bet - but I also suspect she'd have done it anyway because their happiness is more important to her than her own.
And yet it was Applejack who stole the scene for me. Her "Yep. Mighty low down and dirty of me." had me in hysterics.
I love this. I love the overarching theme, the characterisation of everypony who appears, and the relationship building between Twi and Pinkie - it feels very real and natural, and I'm enjoying every minute of it. But most of all, today? I love your Applejack.
Awesome work as always DB.
890205
890685
like 891115 said
i accept each shipping if it's well executed, but many times the authors write a good story about a shipping and then just include other ones. And mostly that happens with the mane 6 and this is where it is the worst. Why(no i won't do it again)? if you causally mention that bonbon and Lyra are together, or Octavia and Vinyl then it is no big deal. There is no cannon and they are mostly build by fannon and fannon says they are together, but the mane 6? they are developed in cannon so everytime something happens what is not cannon we wonder 'wait how did that happen?'
Okay it was implied that RD has a crush on Fluttershy because of the BYF-competition , but what about Applejack and Rarity(who if i may add had a crush on a Blueblood in cannon).
At last here it is much better as some other works (where it suddenly goes 'Oh by the way dear readers Rarity and Applejack are together'), but still this is a beautiful story which gives us a lot of emotions, and the Rarijack and the Rainbowshy take something away from that(at last in my opinion).
893577
If I'm understanding your... interesting take on asking questions and using language, you want to know why mention them all in the same story? Sometimes efficiency. Sometimes preference. In my own case it was because I was very interested in utilizing a love-polyhedron as they do in anime and manga (because at the time I was trying to evoke something akin to all the yuri manga and anime I had been viewing. Mostly Kashimashi, Strawberry Panic! and The Last Uniform.) So rather than a true focal character (Like Nagisa in SP! or Beniko in TLU) I showed cross-purpose affection. Twilight loves Pinkie but Pinkie seems ambivalent while actually loving her as well, but Rarity loves Twilight, and Spike loves Rarity but Fluttershy loves Rarity and Rainbow Dash is sort of uninvolved with anyone though Applejack loves her, but Gilda is still insanely jealous, and Twilight ultimately thinks Rainbow Dash is trying to steal Pinkie from her. So, the ship of the six was necessary so that the web would actually be complete. Plus there were background ships, still are. And I developed or resolved them. I wrote of Braeburn marry Little Strongheart, which was mentioned. I did an extended tale about Colgate and Berry Punch.
It's not a very good answer but it's the one I have.
893624
In a Love Triangle(or other forms) it is more okay because it is a Element for Drama, but truth to be told that doesn't sound like a Story I would read, to complex and, because of that, to easy to screw up.
now to your answers:
Efficiency is nice and all, but it takes away Quality.
Preference:
a Twinkie ship? i like. A Rarijack? i like. A Rainbowshy? i like. All three together? I don't really like
The Rainbowshy isn't even bad, actually it is relatively good. But it still takes away something from the Emotions from the Twinkie(the Rarijack isn't big enough to do that yet). Make it different stories(even if they are in the same Universe) and i would probably read all of them (and probably would like the references to each other), because then they don't take away from each other.
Yay! Chapter update! Another great chapter my friend! Not my favorite pairing but still a great story so far! Just one question, im trying to get my facts straight. Applejack owed pinkie for breaking the pinkiepromise right? And then Pinkie made even with Dash for the whole drunken Twilight scenario, meaning Dash faked it, correct? Thats all i cant get straightdl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_TwilightWut.png
838124 I believe that ship would actually be Rarity and Dash. That would be catastrophic.
hm...Not sure if Thirty-Minute Ponies prompt sparked this, or was conveniently writing chapter when it came up
Now to read the rest of it
893708
Small quibble: Stories are generally, by nature, complicated in some sense if done right. If that's a problem then I don't know what to say.
Also, I reject the bald assertion that including a second ship, necessarily, reduces the emotions available for the other ships. And even if they are not developed, they can work as background ships. Or can be explored in side-tales. Mt favorite example of this is the story "Green" which is at heart a Flarity, but also takes the time to show and develop Appledash and Twinkie. And does it well.
893740
if i need pen & paper just to know who loves who, it is to complex for me.
Sry i started reading Green but didn't like it very much.
I swear, you're gonna end up rocketing TwiPie into my #1 OTP spot with the fantastic writing you do.
Most of all, that glorious pranking scene - it even had me laughing along with them, 'cause it was so damned cute and perfect. Like, wow. You rock. Woohoo!
So awesome!
Not only does it have my 3 favorite ships (flutterdash!) but it was very well written!
Hello, all you fine, lovely people! As always, thank you very much for reading and for the feedback!
890134
I can't speak for any other authors but myself, but I don't think authors "always" do this. It's fairly common, but it's not universal. And it's actually only something I've done once, in a short piece for a story anthology--in that case, I paired up all of the Mane Six (into AppleShy, RariPie, and TwiDash) so that I could compare and contrast the various couples and their couple dynamics with one another.
I do have lots of secondary ships lurking around in all of my multi-chapter shippy stories, usually including at least one that involves a Mane Six pony or two. Why do I do that? Mostly, it's for no other reason than it entertains me to do so. In this story, it's also because Pinkie helping Dash win 'Shy echoes previous events in the story. A full circle kinda thing.
I also don't feel that it takes anything away from the TwiPie story but, rather, enhances it--but obviously that's just my opinion. I'm sorry it doesn't work for you.
890536
Thanks! I like narrative experimentation, and it's always interesting to see if I've been able to make it work or not. Heh.
891138
Oh, thank you! I'm really happy to hear that you like it.
891713
Glad you seemed to like the bit with Twi's folks! I think it probably will be a somewhat different depiction of them, but hopefully not a bad one.
891816
Considering how much you're not keen on Applejack, that's a very high compliment indeed. I'm glad you liked my AJ.
893719
Thanks! I think you've got it ... just to clarify, when you're asking if Dash "faked it," do you mean Dash's scene with Twilight or Dash's scene with AJ?
893729
You wanna know a secret? C'mere. Closer. Closer ... Okay, that's close enough! Here is the secret: At least a good fifty to seventy-five percent of this story is taken from the TMP writing prompts. I've been writing submissions for those prompts with an eye towards writing one long, cohesive TwiPie story for some time now, and at the very end of the story I'll include an author's note that lists which chapters include which prompts.
894415
TwiPie is a good ship, yarrr! And thanks for the compliment on my writing--I'm glad that the pranking scene came across as funny as I hoped it would.
894533
Aww, thanks!
I really like the repitition of because. I also like the repitition of the words," it was the truth, but it wasn't the truth that mattered"
Rarijack. Hatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehatehate!!! I HATE RARIJACK! NO NO NO. NO RARIJACK. :twilightangry:
890065 The BS is that my parents say that shit to me, but I when I say it, they're like, that's not a real reason. WELL THEN WHAT THE FUCK WAS YOUR REASON YOU HYPOCRITES?!
My only complaint is that the story jumps randomly from place to place time to time and is kinda vague but still its a great story.
890612 That isn't the truth that matters and you know it.
And here again I am faced with the hot and cold problem. Here the dialogue isn't great. It's decent. The descriptions are good, but neither t great. I dunno, I guess I'm just frustrated that this story keeps getting closer and closer to greatness, but it always falls short. Anyway, I won't be commenting on this matter any longer, as I feel awfully rude saying this stuff. You're a good writer and you're on your way to greatness, and I imagine that you've improved greatly these last few years.