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Featured In18

More Stories21

  • E Our True Colors

    Scootaloo's never really cared much for Pinkie, but that's not going to stop Pinkie from "helping."
    14,118 words · 11,048 views  ·  608  ·  8
  • E However Absurd

    Pinkie Pie might not be the knight in shining armor that Rarity always wanted … but Pinkie might just be the knight that Rarity needs.
    3,498 words · 2,664 views  ·  311  ·  4
  • T Not Unless You Mean It

    Pinkie Pie's crush on Rainbow Dash is possibly the worst-kept secret in all Equestria ...
    21,035 words · 14,858 views  ·  637  ·  15
  • E Between Chaos and Creation

    The sun is big and beautiful and bright. It warms you up, and it makes you smile. But the sun can also exhaust you. And if you stare directly into the sun, if you get all caught up in its beauty and forget to look away, it can blind you.
    12,212 words · 2,363 views  ·  263  ·  4
  • T Seeking Beauty

    Rarity has accomplished everything she’s dreamt of accomplishing. Except for finding love.
    31,550 words · 7,985 views  ·  624  ·  15
  • T Regrets

    Rarity and Applejack go out for a fun night on the town. Things don't go according to plan.
    4,148 words · 6,941 views  ·  550  ·  13
  • E Almost Beautiful

    Rarity has always believed that there exists a prince for every princess. And she's not wrong about that. She's just not right for quite the exact reasons she thinks she is.
    5,663 words · 6,356 views  ·  777  ·  21
  • E The Lessons Left Unlearned

    After the events of "Filli Vanilli," Pinkie Pie approaches Fluttershy with apologies. But when Fluttershy probes into just why and for what Pinkie is apologizing, Pinkie finds out that there are quite a few friendship lessons she has still
    3,168 words · 3,902 views  ·  572  ·  15

Blog Posts97

  • 18w, 4d
    Love Songs in the Key of FiM: The Complete Album

    Since the album’s finally complete, I thought I’d do a master post for it. One of the most interesting parts of the experience has been that, in reviewing the songs, I think my singing improved more than my guitar-playing did. I hadn’t expected that at all—if anything, I thought the reverse would be true.

    Also, the songs I recorded using an actual separate mic came out sounding worse than the songs I recorded using the built-in mic on my laptop. Go figure.

    "Then She Smiles" - RainbowPie

    (YouTube) (SoundCloud)

    "It All Falls Apart" - RariJack

    (YouTube) (SoundCloud)

    "Back When We Were Young" - FlutterDash

    (YouTube) (SoundCloud)

    "No One Else" - AppleDash

    (YouTube) (SoundCloud)

    "So Beautiful" - RariShy

    (YouTube) (SoundCloud)

    "Faded Glory" - RariDash

    (YouTube) (SoundCloud)

    "One Little Kiss" - TwiPie

    (YouTube) (SoundCloud)

    "Let’s Fly" - TwiDash

    (YouTube) (SoundCloud)

    "If I Said I Loved You" - FlutterPie

    (YouTube) (SoundCloud)

    "(Gonna Have) A Real Good Time" - ApplePie

    (YouTube) (SoundCloud)

    "Lovers and Friends" - TwiJack

    (YouTube) (SoundCloud)

    "Never You Fear" - AppleShy

    (YouTube) (SoundCloud)

    "Let Me Be Your Knight" - RariLight

    (YouTube) (SoundCloud)

    "Everything’s All Right" - RariPie

    (YouTube) (SoundCloud)

    "The Best Scare I’ve Ever Had" - TwiShy

    (YouTube) (SoundCloud)

    "This Is Not the End (It’s Only Beginning)" - Omniship

    (YouTube) (SoundCloud)

    p.s. I have been working on writing projects, too. Several fiddly smaller ones and a single larger story, at least a few of which will hopefully be ready to post in the nearish future. So stay tuned!

    1 comments · 229 views
  • 22w, 4d
    Love Songs in the Key of FiM: Complete!

    Some of you who've known me a while may remember my ongoing project to write and record a love song for every inter-Mane Six ship. Today, after almost two and a half years, I've finally finished. Here are the last three songs that complete the album. (As always, the entire album can be found on my SoundCloud page.)

    "The Best Scare I've Ever Had" (TwiShy)

    (YouTube) (SoundCloud)

    "Everything's All Right" (RariPie)

    (YouTube) (SoundCloud)

    "This Is Not the End (It's Only Beginning)" (Omniship)

    (YouTube) (SoundCloud)

    "The Best Scare I've Ever Had" lyrics:

    I wish I knew

    Just what to say to you

    But I don’t

    But I don’t

    I wish I knew

    Just what to say to you

    But I don’t

    But I don’t

    But if I did

    Here’s what I might say

    The next time

    You glanced my way

    I’d tell you that

    You scare me so bad

    And it’s the best scare

    I’ve ever had

    You always see

    A way to believe in me

    Even when I don’t

    Even when I don’t

    You always see

    A way to believe in me

    Even when I won’t

    Even when I won’t

    Even when I hid

    That phoenix from view

    You helped me out

    And you got us through

    And when you’re near

    I always want to say

    That you scare me in

    The best possible way

    I wish I had

    The nerve to come clean

    To look you in the eye

    And say what I mean

    I’d tell you that

    You scare me so bad

    And it’s the best scare

    I’ve ever had.

    "Everything's All Right" lyrics:

    I’ve burned all my bridges

    I’ve drank all my wine

    I’ve cut out my own heart

    And I’ve set it on the line

    A laugh catches in my throat

    When I say I’m doing just fine

    While the tears in my eyes

    Confess that I’m lying

    But that’s when you come to me

    With a smile so large and bright

    You take me into your embrace

    And you whisper, “Everything’s all right”

    And everything’s all right

    You never, ever fail

    You never let me down

    I cannot help but laugh

    Whenever you’re around

    And should I take a stumble

    You pick me off the ground

    Once I was blind to your charms

    Was lost but now I’m found

    And now when you come to me

    Your laugh so big and bright

    I pull you close and

    I whisper, “Everything’s all right”

    Yes, it’s all right

    Princes are overrated

    And sonnets are so cliche

    I’ll accept nothing less

    Than a love limerick a day

    And who wants red roses?

    I’d rather a pink bouquet

    Just one kiss from your lips

    Leaves nothing more to say

    Because when you come to me

    Like a beacon through the night

    I feel your shining love and it

    Makes everything all right

    You make it all right.

    "This Is Not the End (It's Only Beginning)" lyrics:

    I’m gonna tell you a story

    That took place not too long ago

    ‘Bout a girl who knew it all

    Except for what’s most important to know

    Until the day she left

    For a little backwater town

    Just supposed to be a visit

    But she stuck around

    (I stuck around)

    She pushed everyone away

    Said she had no need for friends

    But five ponies didn’t listen and

    Those same five saved her in the end

    They became the best of friends

    Together they went through it all

    And maybe it shouldn’t have surprised her

    That she started to fall

    (I started to fall)

    True as the ages

    Faithful as the sun

    Giving with abandon

    To each and every one

    Sweet as the spring rain

    Hopeful as the dew

    You made me what I am

    And I’m so grateful to you

    So many memories

    Battles fought, battles won

    Hugs shared and tears cried

    Each and every one

    You were there for it all

    And beside me you’ve stayed

    You’re the answer to a prayer

    I didn’t know to pray

    And I love you

    It hurts, it’s so true

    Yes, I love you

    Nothing else to do

    Because I love you

    I’ll shout ‘til I’m blue

    That I love you

    Yes, I do

    I’m gonna tell you a story

    ‘Bout a girl who’s still growing

    With her loved ones there to help

    Teach her the things worth knowing

    They’re still the best of friends

    Together through all this time

    And I’m still so grateful that

    I’m yours and you are mine

    I am yours and you are mine.

    1 comments · 135 views
  • 23w, 13h
    Story Reading: "Almost Beautiful"

    The Living Library Player Society recently did a live reading of my RariLight story "Almost Beautiful," and it can be found here for your listening pleasure. Many thanks to TLLPS for both choosing my story to read and for letting me know about it! (Extra bonus points are awarded to the reader who actually sang the snippet of "A Thousand Years" that I quoted before the story began.)

    4 comments · 154 views
  • 30w, 2d
    Love Songs in the Key of FiM: RariLight and AppleShy

    For those who may not have been around long enough to know—or who’ve just forgotten—I have a long-running project, entitled Love Songs in the Key of FiM, to write and record a love song for each of the fifteen different Mane Six ships. Up to now, I’ve posted songs for RainbowPie, RariJack, FlutterDash, AppleDash, TwiPie, RariShy, TwiDash, RariDash, FlutterPie, TwiJack, and ApplePie.

    Here are the songs I just recorded and uploaded for RariLight and AppleShy. I am especially pleased with the RariLight song—I think it’s by far the best I’ve written, so far, as well as the song that has my best singing.

    The entire album can be found on my SoundCloud page. Hope you enjoy!

    "Let Me Be Your Knight" (RariLight)

    (YouTube) (SoundCloud)

    SPECIAL THANKS go to EarthSong9405, who helped inspire this song during a conversation we had over on her dA page about Rarity and Twilight.

    Once upon a time

    A long, long time ago

    Lived a princess fair

    Beautiful, head to toe

    Wise and brave was she

    And strong and kind and true

    With shaking voice she told me,

    "Your highness, I love you"

    "Let me be your knight," she said

    "Let me serve you faithfully

    To love a princess, not to become,

    I know now is my destiny”

    But I smiled in return

    And gently shook my head

    I took her hoof in my own

    And this is what I said:

    "I’m afraid you’ve got it wrong

    Destiny, you see, is fake

    Fate is not what happens to us

    But is something that we make”

    "You cannot be my knight," I said

    "Because you’re a princess to me

    Let me be your knight, instead

    And I will serve you faithfully”

    "Let me be your knight," she said

    "And I’ll be your princess too

    As long as you are by my side

    There’s nothing I can’t do”

    "Let me be your knight," we said

    "To protect you like a mighty tree

    And you can be my knight, as well

    And do the same for me”

    And so it was, and so it went

    In that kingdom now long past

    We lived well, and we loved well

    The years went by so fast

    I kept my word and my faith

    And I stayed there by her side

    "I love you," I told her

    As she smiled before she died.

    "Sweet dreams, my knight," I said

    "Where you go now, remember me

    And I’ll remember you, my love

    And how you served so faithfully.”

    "Never You Fear" (AppleShy)

    (YouTube) (SoundCloud)

    Step by step

    Mile by mile

    Hang on tight

    It’ll be just a while

    I’ll get you up

    This mountain, my dear

    Just hold on

    And never you fear

    Step by step

    Inch by inch

    Somehow I’ll find

    A way to not flinch

    I’ll save you from

    This dragon, my dear

    Just hold on

    And never you fear

    Stick with me

    And I’ll never let you down

    I’d move mountains just

    To keep you safe and sound

    You give me strength

    To persevere

    And you chase away

    The shadows and the fear

    You chase away

    The shadows and the fear

    Little by little

    Bit by bit

    We’ll figure out

    How we each fit

    Apples and animals

    Both are near and dear

    But we’ll make this work

    Never you fear

    It’s just a hop, skip,

    And a jump to over there

    Somehow I’ll prove myself

    Worthy to be your mare

    Though the way is murky

    One thing is clear

    We’ll figure this out

    Never you fear

    So hang onto me

    And I’ll hang onto you

    We’ll be okay

    As long as we stay true

    True to one another

    True to what’s sincere

    So just hang on

    And never you fear

    Hang on, hang on,

    And never you fear.

    3 comments · 252 views
  • 38w, 2d
    Thirty Minute Pony Stories: Legacy Prompt #1

    Recently Thirty Minute Pony Stories, the pony writing prompt blog for which I moderated for a few years and over 500 prompts, closed up shop. A number of TMP followers, however, have decided to carry on with follower-submitted prompts in the TMP group here on Fimfiction. The very first legacy prompt has been posted, and it can be found here.

    Thanks go to Esle Ynopemos for running the prompt!

    3 comments · 173 views
  • ...

She never expected to see a golden chariot flying over Ponyville. She never expected just how much her life would change. She never expected Twilight Sparkle … and Twilight Sparkle most certainly never expected Pinkie Pie.

First Published
1st Jul 2012
Last Modified
11th Sep 2012
#1 · 125w, 11h ago · 3 · · Chapter 1 ·

I see you're taking a foray into "the ship most likely to result in a thermonuclear disaster".

#2 · 125w, 11h ago · 1 · · Chapter 1 ·

Oh good lord one of my favorite ships by one of my favorite writers.

Please excuse me while I lose my shit.


#3 · 125w, 10h ago · · · Chapter 1 ·

Your Twipie shipping feels like a twinkie to me.

I want it, and it tastes delicious, but I feel as though it's unhealthy for me.

I don't ship, so gaaaaah, this story. :(



No regrets.

#4 · 125w, 10h ago · · · Chapter 1 ·

May be featured, I have a good eye for this kinda stuff.

#5 · 125w, 10h ago · · · Chapter 1 ·

Oh, Donny's Boy, it's here, it's here! Your multichapter TwiPie is here! :pinkiehappy::heart::twilightsmile:

And I love how this works, with different pieces of the puzzle throughout the show's run. How we see things we've seen before from different eyes — Pinkie's perspective on "Winter Wrap-Up", Lyra and Bon-Bon's perspective on "Feeling Pinkie Keen" — and how we see new things, like what Pinkie was doing moments before being the first Ponyville pony Twilight meets. The collective perspective of Ponyville itself was an interesting touch, unusual but effective.

I look forward to seeing what other episodes this touches on; there are some obvious suspects, but I'm certain you will surprise me with others. I also can't wait to see what other perspectives we get a chance to view Twilight and Pinkie's relationship with.

#6 · 125w, 10h ago · · · Chapter 1 ·

"Caring so deeply about figuring out what makes Pinkie Pie tick that she’d play anthropologist."

Given the origin and meaning of that word, I have some trouble with it showing up in Equestria at all, but I used to fast-forward through The Wonder Years looking for anachronisms, so I'm not surprised that this jumped out at me.

Still, if that's the only complaint I can make about a story - and so far it is - I'm in for a good time, so up goes the thumb.  And that bit about how Ponyville knows its own, even before the new arrivals do - that's just flat wonderful.

#7 · 125w, 10h ago · · · Chapter 1 ·

Moar, prease!

#8 · 125w, 10h ago · · · Chapter 1 ·

Good storytelling. Not necessarily one of my top shippings, but, I can see myself being interested in this.

#9 · 125w, 10h ago · · · Chapter 1 ·


Eh. Not quite.

The device of singing is so overly used, but what makes it worth it is a reference to a real song, or even an original one. This one, perchance, just takes from WWU. It ruins some of the specialness.

And assuming that this is indeed after Winter Wrap Up, how could Pinkie miss Twilight singing? Hmm? If her voice was really that good, couldn't she have singled it out? And when Twi' climbed the cliff, wasn't Pinkie on the cliff below it?

And assuming this is after the gala, same issue. Pinkie was around with her near the end as well.

It's a good, cute story, but a few logic failures. Just like My Little Dashie. Nice try, but no.

#10 · 125w, 10h ago · · · Chapter 1 ·

Once again, you deliver :pinkiehappy:

#11 · 125w, 10h ago · · · Chapter 1 ·

Hmm...intriguing to say the least. Twi-Pie is not something I get to read every day. Must track.

#12 · 125w, 9h ago · · · Chapter 1 ·

>>838387, the part with the Winter Wrap-Up song is when Twilight sings the Winter Wrap-Up song. During the episode "Winter Wrap-Up." This story is jumping to different points in time, exploring Twilight and Pinkie's relationship from different points of view.

#13 · 125w, 9h ago · · · Chapter 1 ·

YES. Donny's Boy doing a TwiPie story following the relationship through the canon show? MANY YES.:pinkiehappy:

#14 · 125w, 9h ago · · · Chapter 1 ·

What what what? Twinkie? Donny's Boy?

Me gusta. :twilightsmile::pinkiehappy:

#15 · 125w, 9h ago · · · Chapter 1 ·


I highly doubt a feature in any case, however. Pretty much all my stories garner similar rating/favorite rates, and none have ever gotten featured. It will do well, but I highly doubt a feature of thus far.

#16 · 125w, 9h ago · · · Chapter 1 ·


Well, perhaps Bon Bon picked up the word from Lyra.

As for whether it gets featured, honestly I stopped caring about making the feature box once getting there became as much a matter of following whatever fad was popular that week as it was quality writing.

It's a decent story with an interesting opening; curious to see where it goes from there.

#17 · 125w, 7h ago · · · Chapter 1 ·

More TwiPie from Donny? Even though it's after 4 A.M. and I'm about to go to bed, it's taking an awful lot of willpower to not read this right now.

#18 · 125w, 7h ago · · · Chapter 1 ·

I wonder if the references to Rainbow Dash is to set up a triangle later or just to show that she wanted to be friends and Rainbow is special for that to be best friends (hence the later episode dealing with it).  Kind of depends on what kind of story this is going to be.

#19 · 125w, 7h ago · · · Chapter 1 ·

Nopony expects the Pieish Pinquisition! :pinkiegasp:

TwiPie is not one of my prime ships, but I really like what you're doing with the story. There's a similar... fragility... to both Pinkie and Twilight, a loneliness and difficulty to fit in that they share. I'm curious to see how this story will progress from here on!

#20 · 125w, 5h ago · · · Chapter 1 ·







theres never enough of this pairing

#21 · 125w, 5h ago · · · Chapter 1 ·

You know the few paragraphs that had the explanation of how ponyville residents know their own and how they knew Twilight must be one of their own? That had me steadily laughing louder with each word until I was literally roaring with laughter, beating on the table, while reading it out loud. That was pure genius, thank you for coming up with that gem. :pinkiehappy:

I was a little disappointed that it's just been following the cannon story so far, but it's the first chapter so I figure it's just setting the stage as it were. It also lost me when talking about Twilight not "understanding" at the party while staring at Pinky. What wasn't she understanding exactly? It goes to the whole Pinky sense thing after that, but I'm not sure if that's necessarily what it was referring to since chronological order got a little skewed in some places.

#22 · 125w, 1h ago · · · Chapter 1 ·

Sorry, but when I read the beginning I had this tune in my head.

As Pinkie left the Cakes house, she made her way to the edge of town. She was lost in thought.

There are few who'd deny, at what I do I am the best

For my talents are renowned far and wide

When it comes to surprises in the moonlit night

I excel without ever even trying

With the slightest little effort of my Pinkie charms

I have seen grown mares give out a squee

With the wave of my hoof, and a well-placed cry

I have swept the very bravest off their feet

Yet day after day, it's the same old crowd

And I've grown so weary of their mindless screaming

And I, Pie! The Party Queen

Have grown so tired of the same old thing

Oh somewhere deep, inside of these bones

An emptiness began to grow

There's someone out there far from my home

A longing that, I've never known

I'm the master of punch, and an angel of fetti

And I'll scare you right out of your pants

To a guy in Pontucky, I'm the life of the party

And I'm known throughout England and Prance

And since I am pink, I can blend in to the party

To recite Hephner Quotations

No animal or pony, can dance like I can

In the fury of my recitations

But who here would ever understand

That the party queen with her seductive grin

Would tire of her crown, if they only understood

She'd give it all up if she only could

Oh there's an empty place in my bones

That calls out for something unknown

The fame and praise come year after year

Does nothing for these empty tears

Pinkie walked back into town, not knowing of the surprise that awaited her the next day, on the day of the Summer Sun Celebration.

#23 · 125w, 1h ago · · · Chapter 1 ·

>>838387 Last story I predicted was featured, but I might not be wrong this time, just wait and see!

#24 · 125w, 49m ago · · · Chapter 1 ·

>>839857 I think it will

#26 · 125w, 33m ago · · · Chapter 1 ·

Oh this shall be good me thinks!  lol  looking forward to more!  


#27 · 125w, 28m ago · · · Chapter 1 ·

This story was recommended by Steel Resolve. A very good writer and recommends good stories. :twilightsmile:.

I enjoyed this. Look forward too more. :pinkiehappy:

#28 · 125w, 19m ago · · · Chapter 1 ·

>>838387 You're trying to apply logic to a crowd]]crowd song.[/url] It doesn't matter where Pinkie is physically, when the song is going on everypony knows how it is being sung and what part of the song they are in. It's a magic all its own. Suspend your disbelief a little, you do it for the show don't you?

#29 · 124w, 6d ago · · · Chapter 1 ·

Heeeeeeello and welcome, everyone. :twilightsmile: This is my first crack at writing a multi-chaptered TwiPie story, so I guess we'll see how it goes!

Thanks so much for the comments and kind words. It's always nerve-wracking posting a new story, and I'm very pleased that many of you seem to like what I've got so far.


HA. A thermonuclear disaster of AWESOMENESS, you mean. :raritywink:


Shipping is magic, Obs! Do not fight it! (Hee.)


Heh, thanks for the vote of confidence ... but, it's funny, every single time someone has said that about one of my stories, that story has never been featured. It's almost like a jinx. :pinkiehappy:


Thanks, Krizak! Especially good to hear your thoughts on the puzzle pieces aspect of the story and the shifting perspectives--it's kinda something new I'm playing around with.


I didn't mean to ruin the specialness of "Winter Wrap-Up" but had been hoping to add some extra perspective to it. I'm sorry if the main effect, though, was to ruin that very lovely musical number from the show. (And as a few others have mentioned, this scene in the story is actually set during that musical number--which is, as best I can determine, the first time Twilight sings in the show.)

And yes, I doubt it will get featured, as well. But that's okay.


Oh, I'm so glad you liked that part! I almost took it out, and now I'm happy I left it in. And there will be much of the story that deviates from the canon episodes in later chapters, I promise.

#30 · 124w, 6d ago · · · Chapter 1 ·

>>840107 Never read it, just guessed.

#31 · 124w, 6d ago · · · Chapter 1 ·

>>840107 I think what is always meant by that is that it should be featured. You write some of the best ships in this fandom Donny.

#32 · 124w, 6d ago · · · Chapter 1 ·

I like that you're following the series to show the development of their relationship. I also really liked that you're using different perspectives, too. I am curious though, to see how closely you stick to canon and whether or not your gonna wander away from it as the story goes on.

Overall, enjoyable read. :pinkiehappy:

#33 · 124w, 6d ago · · · Chapter 1 ·

It's decent.  A little disjointed and not always easy to place what's happening if you haven't seen the episodes in question recently (okay, most of them gave me no real trouble but I had to actually google dialogue to place "griffon a brush off" so I could figure out what Twilight was wrong about) but your characterization and dialogue are pretty good.

#34 · 124w, 6d ago · · · Chapter 1 ·


Aww, thanks. I'm honored that you think so. :twilightsmile:


There shall be wandering away later on, but I'm glad that you like the inclusion of canon thus far. Thanks!


Sorry 'bout that. I'll try to make the future chapters a little less disorienting in that respect.

#35 · 124w, 6d ago · · · Chapter 1 ·

New Donny's Boy multi-chapter story?! Be still, my heart!

Also, Bon-Bon is totally a metaphor for this fandom, isn't she? Haha. Not looking at anyone in particular... :trollestia:

Seriously, I am looking forward to this one. I am a big fan of your longer stories. Always have been. And this one is looking promising so far. Keep up the great work, and I am eagerly awaiting the next chapter! :twilightsmile:

#36 · 124w, 6d ago · · · Chapter 1 ·


Ha! If I'm being honest, Bon Bon is a metaphor for me. Also, I just liked the idea of Romantic Bon Bon playing off of Skeptical Lyra.

And thanks! As per usual, I shall endeavor to not suck! :twilightsmile:

#37 · 124w, 6d ago · · · Chapter 1 ·

>>844352 Pfft. You never suck. Sucking is something I am yet to see you do, so lets up that goal, shall we? :pinkiehappy: Let's aim to be awesome instead. Rainbow would approve! :D

Also, Donny's Boy is best Bon-Bon. Just saying. :rainbowlaugh:

#38 · 124w, 5d ago · · · Chapter 1 ·

>>838387 Wasn't.... Winter Wrap-Up before the Gala?

#39 · 124w, 4d ago · 1 · · Chapter 1 ·

I think the first thing that hit me about this one was that Pinkie Pie knows, with no self delusion, that most of the ponies at her party don't like her - or at least, they don't really want anything to do with her. The fact she knows that and still keeps trying says a lot, to me; she's throwing parties, and she wants people to like her, but she doesn't throw parties because she wants people to like her. That's probably obvious, but I still love it: She wants them to be happy no matter what, but she really, really wants them to be happy with her. It made me think about the start of A Friend In Deed, where she knows all there is to know about everybody - all I can picture now is her learning all these things, memorising them, caring about these people - and everyone just shunning her. Except Rarity. Rarity is awesome. And that's both horrible and amazing. Well done, sir.

The second thing I notice is you teasing me with RainbowPie that won't happen. Why do you insist on hurting me with your wonderful, wonderful stories, Donny's Boy? Is it because you hate me? Me, specifically? It is, isn't it?

Seriously though, the RainbowPie hints were excellent. And they made me very sad. :ajsleepy:

I also like Pinkie's reaction to Twilight and Spike. 'Yep. Feels important - friend time!' It's very Pinkie, and it's also kind of adorable and sad. Well done. I think my favourite part of this chapter might be the musing about Twi being destined for Ponyville, because it's so clearly true - Ponyville is a town of mad, mad, mad ponies. Awesome ponies. But mad ponies. And I can totally see them being able to peg the ones who'll stay. Heck, I bet Pinkie does it for them - she didn't rush to go greet Trixie, or the Flim Flam brothers, or any of the other one off ponies. Clearly, the welcome wagon is to be used only on permanent residents. :pinkiehappy:

The whole Twilight reflecting scene is great, not just because it gives us some insight into Twilight but because - to my mind, at least - it draws a lot of parallels between them. It shows us that deep down, her biggest fear - even beyond not being seen as smart all the time, which made me giggle - is disappointing and hurting the ponies she loves. And those are, I think, the same things Pinkie Pie fears more than any other. Pinkie Pie is afraid of it because she's never really had friends, and she's scared the ones she has will leave her. scared of pretty much the same thing. Do correct me if I'm wrong, though - just how I read it. I like it. A lot.

"Pith helmets are totally romantic." had me laughing for about five minutes. I don't even know why. It was just hysterical - the whole scene was funny, but that's what made it for me. Love it.

And that last section? ...




It was perfect and amazing and I'm not sorry for a second that this isn't RainbowPie.

But don't tell anyone.

The last section was amazing though - I have to admit, I never really considered how much our dear Pink Pony would empathize with the song, and the meaning behind it. You pulled it off perfectly, and my hat is off to you good sir.

I look forward to more. :twilightsmile:

#40 · 124w, 2d ago · · · Chapter 1 ·


Aww, thanks for another one of your in-depth reviews! I'm glad you've enjoyed it thus far, heretic TwiPie though it is. And you are not wrong. For the record. :twilightsmile:

#41 · 124w, 1d ago · · · Chapter 2 ·

Thrown for a whirl there. But it was a good chapter. Nice work there. Few grammar issues.

#42 · 124w, 1d ago · · · Chapter 2 ·

cool story ... i will now wait for more

#43 · 124w, 1d ago · · · Chapter 2 ·

Well now, things are moving into uncharted territory and it's looking awesome. I like how you made the inner group dynamics a little turbulent between some characters. It really made them feel alive and like you can identify with them as people more. Also, that whole train ride back from Canterlot where Twilight cries? That was some seriously powerful stuff right there. Especially with how you described it's significance from Spikes point of view. An inspired approach to that scene.  :twistnerd:

Only criticism I can think of is that the Bachelor party scene didn't feel as fleshed out as the rest of it. As in, why were they having it in Ponyville? Aside from the start you only talked about the gals, so I'm left wondering if Shining Armor was even there? I figured it was a mechanic to get the group out drinking but it still left me confused after that delivery.

#44 · 124w, 1d ago · · · Chapter 2 ·

Something tells me there shall be repercussions!  Good chapter though. Fluid time skips and what not. Good job, :eeyup:

#45 · 124w, 1d ago · · · Chapter 2 ·

This was a great chapter. I always love me some drunk ponies and I like the way you wrote Dash's thoughts, she would consider a pony standing next to her as "basking in her awesomeness." :rainbowdetermined2:

#46 · 124w, 1d ago · · · Chapter 2 ·

Drunk Twi is.......rather funny to try and picture in my mind's eye as well as try to give the dialog her voice as she talks in fluent Drunkenese as one would put it.

Also the chapter was quite good even if I have to keep remembering that the things do jump from situation to situation at times, perfectly fine mind you just need to change gears in my head from my normal thought processes when I read this. Fun though since hey change is good ^w^, keep up the good work.

Oh and I praaaayyyyy that Twi doesn't completely forget what happened and a bunch of drama comes of this due to her trying to rationalize what she did away as her only being drunk.......I don't know if I could handle seeing Pinkie get sad like that T^T. Well that and I'm pretty sure Dash would try to give Twi's face the most painful make over ever if it happened.....emphasis on try though cause not sure if she would go through with it or be able to do so.

#47 · 124w, 1d ago · · · Chapter 2 ·

Now that is some quality work. Good perspectives, strong emotions, and lines that bring tears. This is exactly what I hoped for in this project.

#48 · 124w, 1d ago · · · Chapter 2 ·

Too much sweetness. SQUIRMING, AHH. Tooooo cute.

#49 · 124w, 1d ago · · · Chapter 2 ·

>>867099 Nah, nothing can hurt Twilight. Physically, that is. After all, she has magic to defend herself. She shot freakin laser beams in the season 2 finale. :twilightsheepish:

#50 · 124w, 1d ago · · · Chapter 2 ·

Good, very good, however I did find one error: "and it hurt that you girls wouldn’t trust you and hear you out."

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