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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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*metal gear spotted sound* I remember where that name came from.
9852791
Yep! I asked the author of that story could I make references to his character Daniel and he said yes. But I hope you did enjoy the first chapter since this is an experiment to see what people think of this and what changes should be made
Your protagonist had good intention, but he pay the price for it. But what is he going to be in equestria, a good guy or a villain. And what will he react when he hear Daniel is still ali... wait a minute, I'll be back.
Nope, he's still the only... no, he's the first human they discover in this equestria, but I know he's brother is in that planet somewhere, or at least I think.
9852841
Well to answer both of your questions...this is an alternate Equestria to the one Daniel was sent to...think of it as DBS where universe six and seven are twin universes. But I'll let you keep thinking about what's to come when Zero finally meets Daniel. But who knows what he'll be, I'll just only say this...he's a human, humans are neither good nor evil, but they're on a very thin gray line.
Good story hope you still continue with a trio of godzillas story.
9852885
I do plan on continuing that story, but right now my focus is on this story for now since my creative juices are flowing right now so don't you worry, I haven't forgotten
9852896
9852910
=Awesom work
9852914
Why thank you! But what do you really think about it? Because this is an experiment I'm doing to see what people think about this story. Like I see two dislikes and whoever disliked isn't giving me any feedback on why they dislike it. I posted a blog saying go all out and tell me what you think
Okay. Main qualm is the randomized switching form past to present tense. Choose one, preferably past tense,present makes the story look choppy.
9853182
Thank you for your criticism, my good sir or ma'am. I didn't even realize I was doing that
Could use someone to proof read it and a editor but I like the idea
9853233
Thank you for giving me your thoughts about it. Hopefully, I could find someone when I finish off chapter 2
9853217
Your welcome. Also, might want to fix the redundant grammar here and there.
E. G.
She stopped as she heads back over to her commanding officer as she looks up at him "Yes...what is it, sir?"
Would probably sound better as
She stopped and turned backwards to face her commanding officer, "Yes...what is it, Sir?" she asked *emotion+ly*
It's a lot less wordy and gets across the same point with slightlyadded effect.
9852949
I like it becus its not overly detaild like some stories are.
That makes it quit easy to get in to this one becus i can imagen my suroundings and that is nice and i like the Idea of them fighting there way to the top of the ladder.
Keep it up👍👌💪
9853391
Thank you for telling and helping me out with some problems you have with it. I'll make sure to change it when a week goes by since this is a taste of what's to come and I want everyone to let me know the up and downs to my story
9853463
Thank you for liking it, but I do plan on making my story more detailed as time goes on but some chapters in the future won't be as detailed to let you guys as readers have tiny breaks of none detailed work and then bam, you guys are hit with eye candy of detailed work
9854093
Noice~~ Mr writer.