Alternate Ending
"I let the animals I cared for back into the forest when I was done helping them. I couldn't hold on to them forever," Fluttershy whispered.
Discord pondered deeply at what she was saying then snapped his fingers in sudden realization. "Why, you're absolutely right, Fluttershy. I don't need to make new friends and we can be together with others as well! We'll never be alone and I'll always have plenty of friends!" He made puppets of the other mane 6 on the roof. "I might not be able to oppose death," He dressed up in a black, leather jacket and put on black sunglasses.
Rainbow Dash's eyes started to move and were darting around frantically. "If I can't oppose death, then I'll oppose time." Rarity's eyes started doing the same thing as well. "After all, if I go in time to stop their deaths," Applejack's eyes began moving and she expressed as much anger as she could. "then I can save them in these puppets. Oooh, I wonder what kind of party we can start first?"
It was Pinkie's turn now, and she was less than 'happy' about the situation, especially after hearing about a 'party' and being incapable of moving around to react to it.
"As for Twilight, well, I just have to trap her in one of these and she'll be with us forever!" He cackled. "And the princesses will be none the wiser."
He tapped his chin. "Yes. This is perfect!" Discord shouted as Twilight's eyes began to move. "We'll be together forever and beyond! And you'll still be able to do what you love" He grabbed the puppets and held them all extremely close to his face. "It's the fun things in life that I live for," he joked. "No more statue prisons and loneliness for me."
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WELL THEN.
HAPPY THOUGHTS.
An interesting thing about Discord's character is that he can be as strong or as weak as the writer wants to make him. You made him have just the right balance of powers/limitations to create a quite disturbing story.
I feel like Discord would recognize that being turned into an immobile puppet is pretty much the same as being turned to stone, and avoid this scenario. But then again it makes for a creepier story this way. Good job.
7680522 Thank you. I have experience with this kind of power because Psycho and Sociopath.
7680397 EVERYONE'S ALWAYS HAPPY. DON'T BE A DOWNER.
Fuck man... It's a good short read, I enjoyed it... But... By the Emperor... Kinda puts that Chaos Monstrosity into a new light, again, I enjoyed the short read, few mistakes here and there... And kinda Feelsy... But, it's makes things interesting and I like to think on things, good work.
7681000 I can't find all the mistakes. It's an issue with my writing. I'll try going through it again and see if I can't fix them.
7681758 Still a good read, there wasn't too many
7681777 I already found a few.
You progression inti horror is goin rather well if I may so myself. The first time around we had the not Twiligh being revived in a human lab out of paper mache and some interesting commentary on nature vs nurture. This time around you explored the concepts of eternity and holding on to things way past their time. Chosing the relationship between Fluttershy and Discord as your vessel was very wise and both were shown as the characters in the show.
Discord in particular was done splendendly and the two alternate endings really showed how dual his mind can be at a time. Now the first ending is much more of a happy ending which sacrifices some of the fear the story had but gives Discord more depth and allows him to progress as a character.
The second ending however is downright horrifying and it reminds of a short film I saw where a girl gets entrapped in a doll alongside with more little girls around her age.
The entire work is really interesting and it more fits the psychological horror genre than your previous venture. It focuses really well on Discord's warped perception of the world around him and concepts of friendship that he has recently learned not to mention the horror Fluttershy must have felt in the arms of a madman.
In short it was amazing and I wish you to excell and keep it up. It was deliciously horrifying.
7683292 Yay! The training is paying off!
What a neat idea.
Great story!
Discord just went from cute, to psychological. And I mean that in the bad way. Good job by the way
7808609 Thank you.
7809024 Np
Well, that's psychological horror worthy of R. L. Stein.
8751900
:>
Me reading this...
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