The Spoof Collection

by Nickel Alloy

Grimdark

The siege had been going on for months now. Queen Chrysalis had returned, and was now attacking the land. Several ponies had died, including Cadence, Applejack, and Bon Bon. It was up to Twilight to stop Chrysalis once and for all.

"Queen Chrysalis, prepare to meet your maker!" Twilight yelled.

"Twilight, can I--" Spike started.

"No. Chrysalis, get out where I can see you!"

The bug queen jumped down from the ceiling of her secret lair, which was where Twilight was. "Well, well, well. Twilight Sparkle. You've found me, Twilight Sparkle. What are you going to do, Twilight Sparkle?"

"I could use the Elements and defeat you, but I don't want to. Instead, I'm going to reform you!"

"What?" Chrysalis snarled. "You could never do that. I am unstoppable! My loyal subjects will destroy you!" She raised her hooves over her head and called down her army. Zillions of changelings magically appeared out of thin air and swarmed around Twilight. "Loyal subjects, destory her!"

The changelings attacked. Twilight blasted them. Soon the gajillions of changelings were lying on the floor dead. "I defeated them. Now what?"

"What? No!" Chrysalis yelled. "Damn you alicorns! My loyal subjects should have destroyed you!"

"I guess not," Twilight said. "Chrysalis, you are a psychopath. You could be much more than that with love. I can help you."

"Do you really think so, Twilight Sparkle?" Chrysalis asked, wiping away a tear. "I could have friends?"

"Yes. And so much more. Join me, Chrysalis!"

"Okay. I will join you, Twilight Sparkle." Chrysalis reached out her hoof to Twilight Sparkle. "Help me."

"Okay," said Twilight. She blasted Chrysalis with a blast of love magic. Chrysalis floated up in the air and then came down. She was now a sparkling purple alicorn with a long pink mane. Her hooves were gradiented to orange, her ears were green, and her eyes were turquoise. Oh, and her tail was now bright red with a black stripe.

"I look beautiful," said Chrysalis. "Thank you, Twilight Sparkle. You are my best friend."

Then Twilight showed Chrysalis to Celestia, and Celestia accepted Chrysalis as the new princess, and everyone lived happily ever after. Except Spike. Spike fell into a volcano and burned to death.

Oh, and then Fluttershy married Big Mac, Rainbow Dash created a harem, and Applejack became the queen of incest. Scootaloo killed herself. And Cherry Jubilee was poisoned by Braeburn in a plot to take over her cherry farm. The end.

Author's Note:

I'm actually doing this. Ok.