Stuck In The Middle With You

by CoffeeMinion

You Gotta Know When To Hold ’Em - [Historical Comedy] - June 2019 Flashfic ("Ow! Where did that come from?")

“Oi! Gerroff me boulder, ya git!”

Startled, Private Persnickety fumbled his quill and inkwell. They fell and shattered into a huge, sticky mess.

Persnickety tisked. “Now how am I supposed to file this report?!”

“You wot?!” bellowed the wild-eyed, dirt-brown stallion who’d come galloping out of nowhere. “’S me land and me boulder. Private property, ’s is!”

“Sir, with respect… this clearly matches the description of Dragonlord Infernus’ stolen egg. Princess Celestia is searching everywhere on his behalf.”

“No i’ ain’t. Oi says it’s a boulder that just fell out a’ the sky! And if you ain’t gotta warrant, oi says you ain’t welcome!”

“Indeed, mister—?”

“Holder Pie.”

Persnickety flipped through his various papers, seeking the pre-signed warrant he’d been issued for just such an occurrence. He smiled with triumph as he prepared to fill in the name and serve it—

He froze.

“Um. Sir? Could… I… borrow a pen?”

Author's Note:

This originally appeared in the June 2019 Flashfic contest, which had a limit of 150 words.

Comments

[CoffeeMinion]

9438768
BTW good sir, I am at last hoisting the rest of my shorts up the flagpole. Only took me a year and a half, give or take!