I_Darkstar_X
Joined 3rd Apr, 2013 ·
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That was AWESOME!!!!
The story was great. Though the "daddy" part was a weird part for me. Now, just what is that adorable sharkpony doing with the misty eyes? I gladly await your future works.
Wow... I didn't know I had a sharkpony fetish until I read this story. Well done.
Seeing that this is your first story, I noticed something small in your writing style. It's nothing major, but you really should give this a read to improve future fics and this one if you so choose: http://www.fimfiction.net/writing-guide#Said-tags FIMFiction has a fantastic writing guide, and I used it a lot when I was first starting out.
Anyways, I liked this so much I'm gonna share it with my followers. Liked and fav'd! My only regret is that this story is marked as complete. We need more sharkpony clop, and turning this into a multi-chapter story would be fantastic to see. I really liked how you mixed in some adorableness with the sexy times; it's pretty close to how I like to write most of my clopfics. After sex snuggles are best snuggles, after all.
Here's the little blog I wrote about it if you'd care to take a look: http://www.fimfiction.net/blog/674599/sharkpony-clopfic
EDIT: I also shared this on reddit. :P
It reads like you adapted a furry story to pony.
7576938 That's it exactly!
I am not saying that certain parts are not well written of course, but it does feel as if the pony parts were just added in without taking anything else into account.
The names really threw me off as did the fact that he had a car. The story kept making me question whether this was a human in Equestria or not.
It is not a bad story, but some of the details just do not feel like they match up at all.
Edit: I love the cover art!
Will there be a sequel? I'd love one. ~hugs
7576694 I'm here for you, thanks for tell us about this fic sir.
I really like this fic, good job.
7576634
I honestly don't recall. XD
7576694
Thank you so much. ^^ I will be sure to check out that guide.
As for multi-chapter, I probably won't unless I can confidently design a structure to the tale, which I have always had a great amount of trouble with...
7579279 Well, it seems to me that you've already set it up to be a multi-chapter story when you said this:
7576974
It takes place in an alternate reality future a friend of mine and I designed over many years.
The reason for more standardized naming was, one, the rise of digital communication and planet-wide citizen registry caused names to need a more traceable surname. As a result, it became easier to imagine a first name to pair with the surname, rather than keep the old style.
Cars. Again, as the planet became more and more connectable, and cities became larger and larger, it was less feaseable to walk or use a train. Miniaturizing the boiler of a train was child's play for many unicorns, and a rudimentary steam-powered ICE was created, and it developed from there.
7579108
He looks so proud of his typo. I can see the whole team just laughing their heads off while he is just confused. XD
7579291
You are not incorrect. I only said "probably". I just need to outline the continueing events, which, as I said, I'm not very good at and have nearly never done.
7579315 It doesn't have to be perfect, ya know. This is your first story, after all. You can bounce some ideas off of me if you want. I'm on skype and discord a shit ton, probably too much. XP
7579321
First published story. And I'll keep that in mind, thank you. ^^
I don't always love a clopfic with odd writing. But when I do, it's either a favourite fetish of mine, or a newly discovered fetish. Stay thirsty, my clopper friends.
But seriously, the names and writing were a bit off. However, you made me discover a sharkpony fetish. For that, I love you and this fic.
It will be so awesome to see more like this
Really awesome job with this story
I find the sharkpony mare freaking adorable! She seems so innocent, but at the same time, she isn't.
7579304 in other words almost and I emphasize "Almost" the same as human technological evolution right?
7580095
Late 80s, early 90s, yes.
Awesome fic! Good job
Great job daddy
Just for future reference, I had the cover art taken down, as you had no permission from the artist or OC owner (that one being me), nor did you ask any of us for it.
Presuming you found it somewhere on the Internet other than DeviantArt or Derpibooru, I suggest checking sources (google image search works well here) when picking cover art for this sort of stories, on the off chance someone may not be happy with having images of their character featured in a clopfic, especially when I'm strictly against NSFW content involving her and see it as insulting and damaging to the character's integrity.
7606731
I'm deeply sorry, I meant no disrespect nor offense. Usually my covers are stock images of like three roses or a question mark or whatever, so I completely didn't realize otherwise when I was looking for a cover.