It has been one year since the Canterlot Invasion, and since then, the Changeling Kingdoms have been falling apart. Without the consent of the other hive rulers, Queen Chrysalis and the young Queen Silver plan another invasion. As conflict within the hives rise, another queen attempts peace with Equestria. But any possibility of peace may be undone as one vengeful pony seeks the destruction of the entire changeling race, and one ambitious changeling schemes to take control of all four hives. Twilight Sparkle and her friends become the only ones capable of saving Equestria from what is only the beginning of dark and evil things to come.
Proofreader: OkemosBrony
Pre-Reader: stanku
This story takes place before the Season 5 Finale
Chapters (3)
I'm hooked, this is great.
Not a bad start, and you managed to make me dislike Winter from the get go. Yeesh, talk about a scumbag.
You've turned me off on this story, and here's why: Your opening gives away far, far too much. It reveals major plot points that are (presumably) supposed to remain a secret until later, and tells about 90% of the story before I've even read the first chapter. These things are supposed to give the reader a taste of what's to come, not spoil the whole thing. I apologize if it seems that I only have negative things to say, but as it stands, your synopsis completely turned me off of what looked like an incredibly promising tale.
7267424 I have taken what you said into consideration and changed the synopsis. I know the first draft of the synopsis gave away what seems like a lot, but there are a ton of unrevealed things in the story. Thanks for the comment, I always appreciate constructive criticism; perhaps you can still check out the story?
I haven't even started reading this. I will put this on my watch list and once this gets up to say, 5 chapters, I will start reading.
Good luck.
Hmm. Something tells me that jail isn't going to be the end for Winter. She'll find some way to make trouble... for everyone, including her teammate that informed, and rightly so, on her.
Didn't this story used to be like, much, much longer?
7439182 I think you're thinking of another story. This one only had one chapter until today.
It's been almost a year. When is the re-write coming?