During the war between Equestria and the Crystal Empire, the mane six get captured. Horrors await, as each of them is 'personally' interrogated by King Sombra.
I like where this is going, but...before you start writing more chapters, please go back and get rid of the bold in most of the characters' quotes. It not only looks weird, but they are a complete eyesore, which is bad. I suggest you save the bold stuff on certain sentences, such as someone yelling in anger or in a real panic voice.
Amazed at how much of a fight the pegasus had put up, Sombra looked ahead and noticed the four remaining ponies were almost out of the pass. Not wanting to lose his prize, the stallion quickly channeled dark magic in his red horn and blasted the ground, yelling "You shall not pass!" and creating a fissure long enough that it caught up with Rarity. The mare fell in, shouting for help.
Why are all your characters speaking in bold as if they were shouting? I suggest you fix this.
I like where this is going, but...before you start writing more chapters, please go back and get rid of the bold in most of the characters' quotes.
It not only looks weird, but they are a complete eyesore, which is bad.
I suggest you save the bold stuff on certain sentences, such as someone yelling in anger or in a real panic voice.
I like the Lord of The Rings line that you used.
Try to save bold words for later, buddy. Put emphasis on them too of your making them yell scream or shout; or bellow. Just a little tip.
Also, I know exactly what Sombra has in mind for the Mane Six...and they will not enjoy it in the least.
I hope that little bunny hiding the Crystal Heart is okay too...
Ha the bunny will never tell BWAhahah
Harry Potter!
10557195
You mean Lord Of the Rings