Chapter 2 - Defeat
3 months later...
“Beware of the incredible magical arts of the Great and Powerful Trixie!” Trixie shouted out to the crowd in front of her. She stood on her hind legs on a small stage and just started with her performance. Her trademark fireworks ignited behind the stage in the air to lure more ponies to her show.
The crowd before the stage grew with every moment to an incredible amount of ponies. That alone would be strange, since there are way to many ponies already to fit in this small town, but there was something else that was even stranger.
It was deadly silence all around. There was not a single sound to hear anywhere. None of the ponies that arrived at the stage moved a muscle or said anything. The only sound came from Trixie and her fireworks, but the latter slowly vanished with the end of their lifespan.
“Well then. “ Trixie announced after coming down on her front legs, “ For the first incredible magic trick Trixie will -.”
“Just shut up and show us how pathetic your magic is, so everybody can laugh at you!” A random voice called out from the crowd, before Trixie was able to finish her sentence. Without a warning their started a massive laughter from the crowd and grew louder with every second.
“Who dares to insult the Great and Powerful Trixie? Show your face so that I can prove to you how magnificent Trixie’s magic is!” Trixie demanded to the crowd with an angry glare. But soon her glare turned into a frightened frown after looking more closely at the ponies. She thought before that their was something strange with these ponies and only now she noticed what it was.
Every single pony looked exactly similar. Their bodies,coat colors and the manes and tails where all the same and there was no way to tell if any of these ponies are mares or stallions. But the most disturbing fact where their faces.
Or to be precisely: The total absence of these.
Not a single pony in the whole crowd had a face, they where all just dark shadows without eyes or a mouth. But even without mouths, Trixie could still hear their laughter.
“Wha-, what's going on here?” Trixie muttered to herself, while taking back a few steps to the end of the stage. Suddenly the stage disappeared under her hooves and she fell to the ground. After coming back to her hooves she noticed that the black shadows were coming closer to her and began to surround her. She tried to turn around and run away, but after a few steps even more shadows appeared out of nowhere in front of her.
Looking around Trixie noticed that she shadows had closed the circle around her with even more of them joining. Every second they got closer to Trixie, still laughing.
“Go away!” Trixie shouted at them. “Don't force Trixie to use her magic against you!”
“Ooh, now we are so scared.” Trixie heard the same mocking voice as before from all around her over the laughter of the shadows. “Just show us already how weak and pathetic you are! Maybe we won't laugh to much at you at all, but only maybe!”
“Ok, you have not wanted it differently.” Trixie shouted at the still growing mass of shadows around her. “Be prepared for Trixies incredible magic!”
Trixie casted one of her spells, but nothing happened. No magic aura appeared around her horn and there was no sign of any magic. She was not even able to feel the magical flow inside of her anymore.
“What's happening?” Trixie was shocked after realizing what was going on and started to cower in fear in the middle of the circle the shadows formed around her. “Why can't I use my magic?”
The shadows stopped laughing at that moment and for a few moments there was nothing than silent. But then the voice resounds again from everywhere at once.
“Now we see the weak and pathetic Trixie in all her glory. That is all you ever was and will ever be.
WEAK AND PATHETIC!”
“Weak and pathetic.” The shadows started to chorus all around her again. “Weak and pathetic. Weak and pathetic. Weak and pathetic. Weak and pathetic.”
“NO, STOP IT!” Trixie screamed while pressing her hooves on hear ears. “PLEASE STOP! I don't want to hear any of this any more!”
“Weak and pathetic. Weak and pathetic. Weak and pathetic.”
“No, no. NOOOOOOOOOO!”
~*~
“NOOOOOOOOOO.”
Trixe awoke from her nightmare with a loud scream, covered in sweat. Trembling in fear she looked around, only to notice that she is still in the middle of the clearing she reached earlier for the night. Firs,t she only saw her magican hat and cape lying in the grass beside her. After she was sure to be alone, she let out a relieved sigh and fell on her back again, staring at the night sky.
'Just a dream...' Trixie thought. 'Just a stupid nightmare like the last few dozen before.'
Trixie sighed again. Since the Alicorn Amulet incident in Ponyville three months ago she got nightmares every time she closes her eyes and tried to sleep. She tried different ways she heard of and visited a few doctors, hoping something or someone could help to get rid of the nightmares. Sadly, nothing works and the nightmares keep coming every night and day.
It was not such a big problem in the beginning, but the constant lack of sleep took everything out of her after a few days, and the following weeks were not better.
It interfered with her performances in some towns, at least the few where she still was able to perform without being asked and judged by the Ursa or the Alicorn Amulet incidents. In these cases she was either ignored, humiliated or hunted out of town from the ponies around.
To make it short, she suffers from terrible nightmares, had no place to live and no money.
Her life was a disaster.
“Just what happened with my life?” Trixie whispered to herself while looking at the night sky. “Where did I go wrong? Everything was fine not long ago. I performed in many different towns, was well known around Equestria and had my freedom to travel wherever I wanted without any problems.”
Trixie frowned and there was anger in her voice now. “But it all ended that fateful day I arrived at Ponyville and the Ursa reached the town. My caravan got destroyed and my career was ruined. And all of this thanks to Twilight Sparkle. She humiliated me in front of the whole town. The story traveled somehow to other towns and everything was over.
“All thanks to Twilight!” Trixie shouted in the night.
Trixie laid there in total silent for some minutes while calming down.
“Who am I kidding.” She muttered to herself with a sigh. “I ruined everything on my own. If I had not gone to far with my boasting these two colts would never had brought the Ursa to town and everything would be like it used to be. It was all my fault and my alone.
“What should I do? I tried to fix it myself and it didn't help at all. And the nightmares won't stop either.
I don't think I can solve anything of this mess myself.”
'Trixie, if you ever need help or if you change your mind, you know where you can find me!'
“Well.” Trixie sighed again. “Never thought that this day would come, but I have to admit, I need help.
And there is probably only one pony in this world right now that would help me.”
So, it's not a bad start to a story, but you need some help with tenses... you kept changing them through these two chapters. The grammar was okay, but some mistakes could be avoided. What I suggest is checking around some of the groups for writers and editors and see if someone is willing to work with you on fixing that.
Good luck!
I'm interested to see where this goes, tracking for now
6611982 thanks for the advise, I will see if I can find someone for proofreading
I thought that there would be some problems, it's nearly 10 years since I was in school after all and I don't use english that often
6612232 I'm happy that you like it so far, the beginning was really hard and I rewrote it several time before I was happy with it
I hope that I can get the characters of the main six and others right in the next chapters
How did you not notice that Trixie in the first place?
Hey, there are already a few a-holes in the show . Don't be one whoever you are And you're talking to the Great and Powerful Trixie!!!
I'm pretty sure you only know tricks that are for show . Not for defence or any other magic in particular
Trixie, what dream have you gotten yourself into?
Nightmares. *Sigh* I'm guessing part of it has something to do with her past
And this has been going on for 3 months?!
Next time, she might even be Derpy 2.0 (Though Derpy is still better Now have a muffin 1.bp.blogspot.com/-QEOxULPZyuo/UpUF3QbYwnI/AAAAAAABnIU/h_X_V8-36AA/s1600/mlp__derpy__s_muffin_party__by_maxmontezuma-d5qegez.png
Don't cry Trixie . If I]you cry, I cry too!
Dang it. Thought this was a fic about adventures of Trixie Ohh well. Back to Ponyville we go! Though it's a cliche now in most stories about Trixie. But I'm curious what you have in mind for the little magician. Overall, this chapter has improved from the 1st. A little dark, but I'm sure it will be darker in a few chapters .
Any chance for shippings in this fic? Maybe at least a background shipping or something It adds up to the gag
6701134 Dang it. My emoticons disappeared again!!!
6701134 well, it's a nightmare, you don't always notice everything strange in the beginning
it's not really known what spells Trixie knows at all, but at least she can try to distract someone to escape
It was mentioned in the description that she will return to Ponyville after all, so no surprise. And yes, she got nightmares for all this time. Maybe I will add the Dark tag to the storie later, depends on what I wll write
And a cliche for my first try writing is not that bad I think
like I mentioned in the other comment on chapter 1, no planned ships till now, but it is still possible that I will change that a bit later
whats a scheme?
ooo... nightmare reminds me of doctor who. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V2Px5tUfY74
http://whobackwhen.com/wp-content/uploads/n021-the-idiots-lantern-angry-doc-faceless-rose-doctorwho-drwho-doctor-who-tennant.jpg
lol
took her 3 months to admit defeat? hmm... took a wile, you certainly have her stubborn streak down.
6924155 lol, something like this was what I had in mind, but I never watched Dr Who
that was exactly my goal in this part
first I thought about 1-2 month, but than I changed it since Trixie would first do everything she could before asking Twilight for help after all. After that I thought shortly about 5-6 month, but that seems a bit to much considering how bad the nightmares are
I honestly expected the nightmares to be worse.
I wonder why Princess Luna didn't help Trixie. Luna would encourage trixie to return to Ponyville since it's likely that the nightmares won't disappear otherwise.