Chapter 1 - Good morning
“I should have been there! I should have been with her! She was my closest friend! She shouldn’t have died alone! But instead, I was asleep!”
>> Activating Project Steelpony procedure number #303, Base file: Equus Habilis (Handymare), Mk VII (DPhI && DEx approved, DHS disapproved) Subject name: Lyra Heartstrings.
>> Commencing procedure.
>> Administering anaesthetic.
>> Waiting…
>> Subject unconscious, continuing procedure.
>> Augmentation 0%
>> Augmentation 1%
>> Augmentation 2%
>> Augmentation 3%
>> Augmentation 4%, cancelling individual percentile count because who has the time to read that?
>> Augmentation 20%, brainstem connected, converting form chemical anaesthesia to neurological anaesthesia.
>> Augmentation 40%
>> Augmentation 60%
>> Augmentation 80%
>> WARNING! Critical power failure! Augmentation 88%, subject stable. Searching for alternate power source.
>> Unable to locate power source, consulting protocol.
>> Directive confirmed, placing subject in stasis until alternate power source is established.
>> Goodnight.
* * *
>> New power source established, solar panel reserves. Rebooting.
>> Subject integrity maintained, continuing augmentation.
>> Augmentation 90%
>> Augmentation 95%
>> Augmentation 97%
>> Augmentation 98%
>> Augmentation 99%
>> Augmentation 100%, Time taken: 105,170,400 minutes, 13 seconds.
>> Good morning.
* * *
I awoke.
Images of a Stable Tech poster boy played across my vision as I considered myself.
I felt… not quite dead, but as if my body underneath the skin was numb, so numb that I couldn't even feel the numbness. And their were holes, holes in my skin, holes in my perception of the world. The felling there was made obvious by its absence. The little pony on my vision had stopped frowning over a loading bar and appeared bright and alert.
>> Greetings! thank you for choosing the Project Steelpony Handymare Mk VII augmentation!
The little pony spoke, his dialog mirrored by a prompt along the bottom of my vision.
>> If you feel that you have been deceived, forced, or blackmailed into accepting the augments inside your body, feel free to ask for a trained defence lawyer. They will be despatched immediately to revoke your claim.
What.
>> If you have not in fact been deceived, forced, or blackmailed into receiving these augments, please ignore the previous statement.
Okay…
>> Now, please prepare yourself for a full physical examination. Task one: open your eyes.
‘(Quest added; Open your eyes.)’ Appeared in the top left corner of my vision. The Stable Tech pony appeared in a speech bubble and told me that the update was my quest log, and that it was a sort of checklist managed automatically by my augments. Useful.
I opened my eyes.
I was lying on my back inside an open medical pod. The walls and floor where made of faded white panels, with lighting strips near the floor and ceiling. I couldn’t move.
(Quest complete; Eyes opened.)
>> Excellent! Now, as your pre-augmentation instructor will have informed you, your brain is now the third smartest thing in your body. The second smartest thing is your body itself, simply think about what you want to do, and your new body will do it. Start by moving your jaw, select ‘Y’ when you are ready to move on.
(Quest added; Show those pearly whites!)
I tried to move my jaw, which suddenly snapped open. It felt like it was trying to rip itself off my face. I quickly tried to close it, but it slammed shut and pressed the teeth into the bone. Wait, do I even have bone there anymore? After a few more moments of dental agony I tried to just let my jaw go slack, which seemed to work.
Okay… I thought, remembering my — very basic — training. Let’s try that again…
oooOOOooo
“I’m so exited to experiment with this new tech!”
Dr Ex Machina of Steelpony R&D lead me down a grey corridor, expounding on the many wondrous aspects of my soon-to-be augments.
“You know doctor, over the course of the past five minutes you have told me manny apparently wonderful things about my augments,” I said, “but I’m afraid to say that I haven’t understood a word of it.”
“Ah,” he intoned, slightly embarrassed, “sorry, I get a bit carried away sometimes and I forget who I’m talking to.”
“Don’t worry about it,” I smiled at him, “but perhaps you could continue in a slightly less technical manor.”
“Ok, so basically your augments are going to be some of the most advanced stuff we've developed so far. It’s going to be strong, light, and fast. It’s also been highly approved by DPhI, that’s the Department for Physiological Integrity.” He shook his head sadly, “Some of the pour bastards for our earlier projects went mad because they didn’t feel like themselves anymore. There was this one heavily augmented guy who started shagging everything, apparently sex makes you fell less like a lump of metal.”
He saw the expression on my face and quickly raised his hooves in front of him, “Don’t worry! Since then we’ve had a lot of opportunity to study the physiological effects of augmentation and come up with ways to deal with it. Your new body will have as much of its old skin as possible. It’ll also have a beating synthetic heart, not just a smooth pump in your chest.” Considering me suitably placated, he continued down the hall. “You’ve also got the best start, everyone else we’ve treated had been physiologically damaged in some way or shell-shocked after severe physical trauma. You’re the first pony to have a procedure this extensive after starting off totally healthy.” He turned to me, a question in his eyes. “So,” he asked, “why did you volunteer?”
“They said this job came with an opportunity to help kill stripes,” I said in a tone with the finality of a crowbar, “that’s all I needed to know.”
“Okay… was not expecting that.”
Seemingly eager to change the subject, the doctor continued expounding on the design of my augments.
“We actually got a few of the guys form Stable Tech’s pipbuck development team to come in on it, they put all sorts of stuff from their next line of pipbucks into the programming. They even gave us a few arcane micro fusion cells, which means you shouldn’t be in danger of dying because your heart runs out of power. But you’ll probably still need gems to keep you going for everyday activities.”
We reached a door to another room and he turned to me, face suddenly serious. “Now, three very important things to remember. One; eat gems and metal. Your new body will need the gems for fuel and the metal to make repairs. Two; your body reacts to your thoughts, not your actions. Just think what you want it to do and it’ll do it, if you try to perform the action yourself your body will overcompensate. Three; you have all sorts of guides and tutorials built-in, you can find them with the pipbuck interface built into your left leg. Good luck.”
I nodded at him, and walked through the door and onto the threshold of my new life.
oooOOOooo
I kept practising controlling my jaw until I could talk without biting my tongue off. Then I though hard at the ‘Continue’ prompt until it disappeared.
>> Excellent! the rest of your body is now under your control, we recommend you move with caution. Don’t forget to check out some tutorials when you’re ready!
My new E.F.S. danced across my vision as I slowly sat up and examined myself. It wasn’t to bad. Patches of skin had been removed on the front and back of my knees and hocks. Along with a section between my shoulder blades and around the bace of my neck reaching down the sides of my chest, mirrored by a section between my legs along the inside of my stifles. The frontal knee sections on my forelegs extended to just above my fetlock, the metal probably concealing my pipbuck interface.
But the bigest draw on the eyes — besides my eyes themselves, which were glowing a soft gold — where my hooves. The think keratin plate on the front of each had been split into six sections, four narrow middle strips and two wider side plates on each hoof. The frog and pastern below my hocks had been removed entirely, replaced with the mint-stained metal that showed through the holes in my skin.
My breathing picked up and my heart responded by tapping out the grim fandango in my chest. That was some comfort, at least my body still behaved fairly normally. Even if it didn’t look normal.
I rose to my feet cautiously, being carful to remember that while actions spoke louder than thoughts, thoughts were less likely to get me kicked in the jaw.
I looked around and… something was wrong. Dust had collected in the corners of the room and there was no one to be seen. Not even in the observation booth that overlooked the room I was in. I headed for the door and looked out into the corridor. Nothing. Then I turned the other way and…
A pile of bones lay against the wall, as if some pony had collapsed on the floor and then been pushed sideways out of the way. And something was written on the wall over the long-decayed corpse.
I approached, horrified. As I came level with the message it became clear what it said.
‘THe CaKe IS a LIe’
I just stared at the wall, like some sort of twisted cat meme. I must have been there a full minute before I noticed the door next to the message.
‘Dr Ex Machina, R&D’
I quickly entered the room, anything to get away form that wall.
The office was much as you might expect one to be, filling cabinets lined the walls, a large wooden desk a comfy looking chair dominated the room. On the desk was a terminal and a long dead pot plant.
I logged into the terminal, which flickered badly as it synced up with the pipbuck built into my leg. I scrolled through the entries. There where only five entries after the date of my augmentation. I downloaded them onto my pipbuck, then popped open my leg to view the files.
Today we use the Equus Habilis augmentation for the first time! So many possibilities with this design, it boggles the mind. Will tell you more post-augmentation.
———
Fuck fuck fuck!
They did it, the bloody did it, those striped bitches fired megaspells at Equestria.
Power’s out, so of course the augmentation machine shut down and locked the subject in stasis. Everypony’s gone nuts, but don’t worry, we have plenty of food so we should be good until help comes.
Everything’s going to be fine.
Everything is not fine.
People have started leaving, it’s a radio-active winter out there and people are still leaving. They say that if we don’t find help we’ll starve to death.
Personally, I prefer starvation to radiation poisoning.
My assistant — Mis Rosebud — is having trouble. She’s not dealing with things well, it doesn’t help that that asshole Redcoat is devoting all his efforts to tormenting her to pass the time.
I just hope that someone will find us before any more of us leave.
Everypony’s gone.
They all left, it’s just me, Rosebud, and Redcoat now.
I’ve started trying to cobble together some sort of radio so we can get out a distress call, hopefully that will work.
At least it’ll keep me busy.
That asshole Redcoat! While I’ve been busy building the radio he’s been getting even worse with Rosebud, the pour dear’s falling apart. She just keeps mumbling about our food reserves, Redcoat is teasing her by telling her that there’s some cake somewhere and laughing when she races to try and find it.
I’m going to keep working on the radio, but I’ll do checkups to stop him form tormenting her.
Here’s hoping we get help soon.
I finished the radio.
It just played over and over again with distress calls, on every channel.
The whole world’s fucked.
No one’s coming, everyone has there own problems to deal with, we’re not worth it.
I must have sat there for a few hours, just listening. I forgot to check on Rosebud and Redcoat.
I found him, just outside my office. Looks like he finally pushed Rosebud to far, that or somepony else came in and ripped his throat out.
What am I talking about? Of course it was Rosebud, she even wrote ‘the cake is a lie’ on the bucking wall, in his blood.
I’m going to find her now, I don’t think it will end well.
I’m going to die here.
She’s going to die here.
Redcoat’s already died here.
I’m going to die.
Fuck.
I just stared at the text, total shock registered on my features.
“No…”
If the bombs fell… if everypony died…
“NO!”
I raced down the hall, terror granting me control of my cybernetic limbs.
“NO!”
Doorway after doorway flashed past me, If the bombs fell and everypony died, then you are alone…
“NO!”
Everything you know is gone…
“NO!”
You are alone.
“NO! NO! NO!”
I rushed for the main doors, ignoring the skeletons of two ponies apparently locked in a tight embrace. I threw open the doors and stepped out into the light.
“No…”
The world was ripped asunder, dead nothingness surrounded me, nothing. Nothing but wasteland. I collapsed.
“No…”
Footnote:
Achievement get!; I hope you like leather.
Welcome to the apocalypse.
Stats updated:
Ironmare; Augmentations are fun! +6 to damage resistance and strength, +4 to speed and agility, -60% damage form poison effects, -60% health regeneration form health effects, -60% alcohol and drug effects, E.M.P.s now cause stun effects.
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Interesting, let's see where this goes.
6590496
I have plans! so many plans...
So many references to make, so little time.
6590718 just remember to be clever about the references, a referance is not funny nor a joke, it can be this things but you have to use them right, try to make them small in a way so that someone who doesn't get the referance doesn't even notice it, but somek e who would does notice it... Referances can be a hard form of comedy to get right.