My Dearest Dusk

by CrackedInkWell

Chapter 2

Dusk Shine’s mind was racing, ‘Am I interpreting this wrong?’ he questioned himself. ‘Did Solaris’s letter just tell me that… he’s in love with me?! How? When? Why? And more importantly, what does this all mean? Since when did I all of a sudden just become his special somepony?’

He paused, remembering the breathing technique he learned from Prince Crescendo. He breathed for a bit until he’d calmed himself down a bit.

“Don’t overreact Dusk,” he told himself as he took hold of the next letter on the desk. “I’m pretty sure that there’s a reasonable explanation that your former mentor is saying this. Perhaps, he meant it as a friend. Yes, that’s what it’s gotta be! It was just him expressing his view of our friendship.”

The young alicorn Prince unrolled the next scroll.

It read:

My dearest Dusk Shine,

I don't believe there's a word to describe how frustrated I am with you today!

He blinked, “W-What? Frustrated? With me? Since when did I ever get him upset?”

Now, don’t misunderstand me, this doesn’t mean that I hate you now. On the contrary, I can never hate you. However, after this Hearts and Hooves day, I can sincerely say that I am quite irritated with you.

‘What did I do?’ Dusk thought nervously as he read on.

When we had our lesson this afternoon, I would have expected that at your age, you would have taken interest in somepony. I mean, for someone who’s nineteen, I would have thought that you might have taken in some kind of romantic interest in someone by now.

I even asked you what you were doing for this Heart and Hooves day, and you replied, “Why would I be doing anything today?”

When I said that you might have a date with somepony, you looked at me with those amethyst eyes and told me, “Prince Solaris, look at me in the eye and tell me honestly: who in their right mind would ever be crazy enough- no, mad enough- no-no, insane enough to ever want to go out with somepony like me?”

Dusk started to recall the day that Solaris was describing. He was studying on foreign magic that week and he wasn’t interested in anything else but studying back then. 'This must be before I understood what friendship was,' he thought, 'but I still don't see why he would be so upset over it.'

Don’t get me wrong, I am not angry over the fact you’ve said that. Nor could I blame you for all the work that you’ve thrown yourself into. It was how you said it that really got on my nerves. You said it as if you had given up! You told it to me, to my face, as if love will forever shun you.

Dusk, my faithful student, do you have any idea how heartbreaking it was for me to hear something like that? Could you imagine for a second what I would have thought when you said it to me in sincere hopelessness? At that moment, I thought about telling you that you were wrong! There is somepony right there in the same room that would be “crazy”, “mad”, and “insane” enough to say how much you mean to them.

But at the same time, I couldn’t. How could I do anything else but remain silent? I don’t even know how you would feel, much less think about me if I told you the truth. It’s too risky as it is to let you think I've somehow betrayed your trust in me. There’s no way I could afford losing you. And if it means that I have to just solemnly nod, just so I can be with you another day…

Oh Dusk, what do I have to do? How do I convince you that you’re not some hopeless case? How do I tell you how much I care deeply about you without causing you panic?

Then again, even if I did tell you that I do, in fact, love you-

Whatever doubt Dusk had was suddenly shattered when he read that. There was no question, “Elysium above! He really is in love with me?!” The Prince put the scroll face down, trying to comprehend at the confession he’d just read.

So Dusk did whatever he does when he finds out something that turns everything he knew upside down: he paced. And if anypony knew the Prince of Friendship well, that meant that his mind was going top speed.

“What does this mean?” the lilac alicorn asked himself. “The Prince just said that he really likes me. Really likes me. So does this mean that he’s gay? Has he been always like this? Since when has he ever taken any interest like that for me? What did I do? How come none of the history books have ever said about Solaris taking interest in stallions? I mean, the records say that he was married several times. To mares no less! Then again…” He stopped pacing, “What about the stream of divorces? Come to think of it, has he ever had a stable relationship with any of them?”

Dusk searched his library of a brain for answers. He tried to recall every spouse that Solaris ever had. He called up every biography, history, or record that he could remember about Solaris’s wives. It was also when he realized that there was a pattern. Something that he hadn’t realized until that moment. All of them had three things in common: he married for the sake of stability, there were no reports that he’d ever consummated any of the marriages, and they all ended within three weeks to six months.

“Maybe I need to do some research to back this up,” he muttered to himself. Having calmed himself down a bit, he returned to the letter and continued reading.

Then again, even if I did tell you that I do, in fact, love you, I couldn’t blame you for not being nervous around me. I confess, ever since I realized it that I had feelings for you, my mechanism of a mind comes up with thousands of scenarios of how such events would play out. Most of which end negatively.

Tell me, how might you have reacted if I said the words, “I love you, Dusk Shine?” Would you go on a research rampage to figure out if I’m really a homosexual? Would you suddenly get angry and call me things like, “You filthy, unnatural coltcuddler!” before marching out of the room to cease being my student? Or would you return such feelings? In the position that I am, I don’t dare risk it.

I wish I wasn’t such a coward to over think such things.

Dusk shook his head in surprise. Coward? Did a Prince of Equestria, the riser of the Sun, just called himself a coward?

Perhaps that’s why I love you so. Even when you don’t realize it, you have such bravery that I wish I could have. Whenever you attempt spells that despite all the dangers, risk, and even parlous task that would make any rational unicorn refuse, you performed them without question. Even when I could tell you were scared, you had the courage to dive in. Something I trust that your sister, Captain Gleaming Shield would be proud of.

It’s getting late; I think it’s about time I retire to bed. Yet I’m glad that I took the time to write this, it is such a relief to my mind. Dusk, my most faithful, when you go to sleep tonight, I want you to know that you are loved. That there is somepony out there in Canterlot that looks up at the stars that wish that love will come to you. Even if it’s not from me, I hope that whoever you choose to live your life with, that you will be happy, and that pony to treat you like a king. Who would speak with you each and every day to examine what is going on inside that beautiful mind of yours?

Good night, my beloved Dusk,

Forever yours,

Forever mine,

Forever us,

Once again, Dusk found it unsigned. He also noticed that, for some reason, his heartbeat had quickened, too.

Comments

[DaDorkyOne]

Please please keep going I need more!!!!

[IPlayCardsNShit]

For one I`d like to say that making a massive dilemma over Prince's sexuality in this story makes it feel very off. It makes it sound like any other slashfic where the author tries to rush to the point where the characters are intimately engaged. There is no explanation behind the reason for Dusk's behavior, primarily shock. Is homosexuality something that is frowned upon in this version of Equestria? Would it be unbecoming of nobility and the royal family for any reason? The point is, you could have approached this from a different angle. Dusk is meant to be an intellectual character and you intentionally or not made him sound like a teenage girl that just learned of the latest scandalous gossip.

The interaction in the first chapter between the Prince and Dusk was very quick and very out of character, even if Solaris was in a panicked state I highly doubt he would just up and teleport away like that after the confrontation with his student / former student, after a quick exchange of words and a hurried explanation. (If you go by how the Princess behaves in the actual show, cannon wise.) Unless you are aiming to create humour then you have succeeded because so far it looks like a reality show you would watch out of boredom, queue the audience soundtrack.

I would recommend spending much more time on each paragraph as you write and plan ahead so you know in which direction you want your fic to go otherwise you will end up with a pile of mess and plot holes giggity . This has potential, but I`m afraid that unless you take it slower and take your time on expanding on the characters and their alternative universe it will just end up a mediocre take on romance between the rule 63 characters.