The Great and Powerful Trixie! - 1st of Snowfall, ‘09 EOH
The Groggy and Cold Trixie peeled one eye slowly open to see what had roused her from sleep on the first day of winter. Yet again, Rainbow had rolled herself up into a pony-burrito with all of Trixie and Twilight’s blankets after kicking her own off the bed. Trixie had told Twilight simply having one big bed would never do, but did she listen?
Of course not, the Smart and Purple Twily still has yet to rely on common sense rather than empirical evidence for the small things in life. While her three way marriage idea had certainly worked for Trixie and her wives, separate beds were better. Then nopony would steal Trixie’s hoof stitched quilt in the middle of the first snowfall in a castle made of crystals an unlit fireplace.
Even still, Trixie should have been warmer. The Fast and Blue Dashie was warm to the snuggle, when sandwiched between her mares Trixie was warm even without her quilt. Looking over her shoulder Trixie noticed Twily was gone.
She sat up to look around for her, but Twily was nowhere to be seen in the polar vortex of her bedroom. Trixie would have to search for her, the quest for warmth lay before her like a sea of ice-water. The stallion covering for Dashie on the weather team needed to know what the phrase ‘too cold’ means. Trixie would happily tell him that was any temperature below that of a warm shower.
Trixie slid out of bed, gave Dashie an irritated poke with her magic, and trotted off to search for the Warm and Cuddly Twily. Or coffee, Trixie could also be content with coffee.
As she trotted groggily down the hallway Trixie’s ears perked, somepony was frantically moving things about in Twily’s study. A few more steps and she could hear Twily’s voice muttering to herself in that frantic and distressed way which made Twily oddly cute. Entering the room Trixie could see Twilight repacking all of her bags, again.
Trixie gently booped Twily’s nose with her magic, smiled, and yawned, and informed, “The Groggy and Cold Trixie needs help retrieving her blankets from Rainbow. Or snuggles. Or coffee. Please.”
Twilight yelped as she was booped, startled as always by Trixie’s playful gesture. “Oh! Hi hon. Have you seen my copy of ‘Inside the Swarm’? I really need to be absolutely sure I am completely prepared for-”
Trixie trotted up and gently put a hoof over Twily’s mouth. “Trixie knows Twily is already prepared for our… vacation.” Trixie said reassuringly.
Twily’s ears drooped sheepishly. “But… what if I need to know what the specific body language of someling means? Penstripe’s treaty on changelings insisted their language is two thirds nonverbal. I don’t want to offend someone and have to live with an enemy for a whole year!”
Trixie reached with her magic to lift a copy of ‘Basic Spellcasting’ and dangle it in front of Twilight’s nose. “Trixie’s Silly and Over-thinking Twily literally wrote the translation spell that includes Changelish.”
“But… But I only had Meep and a few dozen changelings from Ruby Hive to help me! The Emerald’s dialect could be completely different!” Twily protested.
Trixie rolled her eyes and reached behind Twily’s ear, producing a glass of water with her prestidigitation. “Twily should calm down before she goes all Smarty Pants on everypony.”
Twilight blushed and picked the glass up with her magic. “You really have to show me how you do that sometime.”
“A magician never reveals her secrets.” Trixie said with a smile as she looked around the messy library. It was more fun to keep Twily guessing. Besides, nopony ever believed Trixie when she did tell them.
“You have made a huge mess again. Trixie will help clean up if you retrieve her blankets from Dashie.” Trixie promised.
Twilight’s ears dropped as she took a sip of the water. “She did it again? Already? That’s an evening early… I’ll have to refine the equation again.”
“Trixie will pretend she didn’t hear that.” Trixie mumbled irritably. “You’re not really worried about speaking buggy, you’re afraid of leaving home.”
Twilight bit her lip nervously and nodded. “Y-yeah. It will be a great learning experience, but what if something happens! Spike can handle a lot of things, and Mayor Mare can pick up the political issues, but they are only so good at their jobs.”
A yawn from the doorway caught Trixie’s attention. “Am I too late for Twilight’s last minute freakout?” the Cold-making and Blanket-stealing Rainbow asked.
“The Great and Powerful Trixie demands you stop stealing her blankets!” I informed loudly. Then added, “No she’s in the middle of it.”
“Hey! I warned you two I roll around in my sleep.” Dash protested. A playful look formed on her face, “You know, you could always tie me down for bed.”
Trixie giggled, “Trixie might do that… but she and Dashie would probably lose some sleep!”
Twilight sighed, “Girls, we should make sure we all are on our best behavior for the mission. We need to make a good impression on them, and we need to stay open to any oddities their culture might have. I mean, I have no problem with Dash’s preferences for fun, but that could be entirely culturally inappropriate.
“See? This is why I am freaking out! We know nothing of what kind of behaviors are acceptable. There are no studies on the Emeralds at all because of the no visitors policy they used to have!”
Dash nodded to herself. “Right, I’m at the good bit of her freakout.”
I nodded as well. “Yes. We should do something about the Overreacting and Panicked Twily.”
Trixie and Dash performed the ‘it’s okay’ maneuver, glomping the lavender alicorn on either side, lifting her onto our backs, and quickly running her to the kitchen, ignoring all protests. Once inside the kitchen, Dashie plopped Twilight into a chair while Trixie began to make a grilled cheese sandwich.
Five minutes, lots of loving flirts from Dash, and two sandwiches later, Trixie’s mares were all happy. Except Trixie, who was still cold.
“Thanks girls… I- I just was well you know.” Twilight sighed gently.
“Yeah, we know.” Dashie smiled and wrapped an arm around Twily. It made Trixie feel a little jealous, so she hugged Twily from the other side.
“Look, Twi,” Dash said simply, “everypony you spent two whole months choosing to be in charge of whatever will do a good job. You literally wrote charts and everything.”
“Trixie remembers the forty five minute speech on Spike’s efficiency as a military deterrent.” Trixie mentioned. “You had comparative pie charts and bar graphs with a decade of data each.”
Dash nodded. “Right! You’ve prepared like, way more than anypony would prepare for anything! Well… with the exception of you preparing for absolutely anything. It’s also not like we are going to be on our own in the hive. Our whole social circle gets to go too! It’s just going to be a kinda weird long, hopefully awesome vacation.”
Twilight nodded slowly, ears drooping in embarrassment. “I know, but I can’t help it. I get excited and then I think of everything that could go wrong! The only time that didn’t happen was when I thought of asking you two to share me.”
“Trixie is happy that mostly has worked out.” Trixie said soothingly. “But Dashie is right. This will be fun, Twiliy needs to relax, she won't do her job stressed out.”
“Mostly?” Dash and Twilight asked together.
Trixie narrowed her eye, giving the most intense stare possibly for a pony to give directly into their eyes. “Trixie never gets to keep her blankets! It is her only complaint.”
Twilight giggled, “I’m sorry hon, I’ll see about a solution, maybe enchanting our blankets to stay in place.”
Dash’s ears drooped, she leaned in and gave Trixie an apologetic kiss. “Sorry GPT, I can’t help it. I never sleep well unless I’m on a cloud. Or one of AJ’s trees.” She added thoughtfully.
Trixie nodded in agreement. “Yes, AJ’s trees are oddly comfortable.”
“Yeah,” Twilight agreed. “I’ve been meaning to study her orchard to determine the cause of her trees’ unusually comfortable nature… Oh crap! Did I remember to help AJ find farmhooves to cover for her?”
Dashie and Trixie nodded together, replying in a monotone. “Yes.”
“What about Fluttershy’s wildlife rehab center?” She asked.
“Treehugger is on it. Sure, she’s not as good, but she’s okay enough.” Dash answered.
“The Cakes?”
“Trixie demands Twiliy relax! We have had this conversation ten times now.” Trixie said as calmly as she could manage.
Twilight nodded sheepishly. “Right! Sorry… Um… Is there anything we have actually forgotten?”
Dash gave Twilight a nose boop. “To enjoy the start of our first non-dangerous adventure in like, six years!”
Twilight and Trixie gave her a suspicious look. “You are looking forwards to a safe adventure?” we asked together.
“When it’s with some changelings yeah!” Dash grinned jumping up to hover in the air. “They have a whole different way of flying! I’ve never gotten to talk to one who was a good flier before, think of all the cool tricks I can learn!”
Twilight stood up. “I get it! We just need to focus on the good things more. I’ll bet they have a rather interesting library. We know they have a written language, and that means they have books!”
Trixie nodded, happy the Brilliant and Sweet Twilight was back to her normal self. “Trixie looks forward to seeing what their little buggies think of her magic!”
“Yeah, who knows they might have someone you could learn a few new tricks from.” Dash quipped. Then immediately eeped and covered her mouth with one hoof.
Trixie knew what Dashie feared she would do, so naturally Trixie played into it and laughed, “The Great and Powerful Trixie is the greatest magician on any stage!”
“Trixie, sweetie, she didn’t mean to belittle your magic by-” Twilight began, but Trixie cut her off with a raised hoof.
Trixie made a gesture with her hoof, making a brand new deck of cards appear. “This is a new deck of cards, in the plastic.” She held it out to Dash with a grin. “Open it.”
Dash groaned and took the cards, “Look, I’m sorry… I know your performances and stage persona is so important to you that you never stop doing it.”
Trixie gave her a raised eyebrow.
“Oh, okay.” Dash sighed and opened the deck of cards.
“In your hooves you hold a new deck of cards. Trixie will take the two instruction cards off the bottom,” she said while performing the moves with her bare hooves, “then one of the Discords from the top. Now you have fifty three cards, in new deck order, perfectly arranged. Trixie will set these three cards on the table. Shuffle the deck.”
Dash nodded, humoring Trixie as usual and shuffled the cards.
“Now draw one card. It’s okay to show it to Trixie.” Trixie asked.
“Is this seriously just a ‘found your card’ trick?” Dash moaned. She drew the seven of diamonds.
“No. Write your name on the card.” Trixie asked, producing a quill from thin air with a flick of her hoof.
“Um, okay.” Dash scribbled her name on the card as best she could.
Trixie took the cards in her magic and shuffled them a half dozen times. “Now lets put them back in the box.”
Dash nodded, picked up the box and Trixie slid the cards into it. Then she moved Dashie’s hooves to surround the deck of cards, and held her hooves in her own tightly. “Now, if Trixie could open that deck and find your card, would that be a good trick?”
“Not really, you showed Scoots how to do that.” Twilight commented.
“Quite true!” Trixie answered, “What if she flipped Dashie’s card the other way round so it faced the opposite direction of the other cards without opening the box?”
“That would be pretty good.” Dash commented in an honest tone.
“Foals play! What if Trixie flipped your card, arranged the deck in new deck order, and put the plastic back around the box?” Trixie asked intensely.
“That would be awesome!” Dash admitted with a smile.
“Trixie already did.” Trixie informed letting go of Dash’s hooves to make herself a sandwich.
“What?” Dash said looking between her hooves at a plastic wrapped deck of cards.
Twilight trotted over and looked at the deck suspiciously. “No cuts in the plastic…” She opened the cards up, fanned them out, and dropped them in surprise. Dash’s face up card landed between the rest, her name written on its face.
“How?” Dash begged incredulously.
“The Great and Powerful Trixie reserves her good magic for shows she charges for!” Trixie sang.
“You didn’t cast a single spell! I was watching!” Twilight protested.
“Who wants-” Trixie wished she had her cape for a dramatic swoosh as she spun around on her rear hooves, while producing a tray of pizza rolls, “-pizza rolls?” she asked dramatically.
Twilight and Dash stared at Trixie for a full minute before Dash pointed to her with a hoof and said to Twilight. “This! This is why we love her.”
Twilight giggled and took a few of the pizza rolls. “Seriously Trixie, one day you need to tell me how you do that.”
“Trixie will consider your request.” Trixie said playfully.
The next two hours before sunrise were spent making sure everything was packed. We had agreed to leave early in the morning, just after sunrise. Why? Because Queen Phoenix offered to send somepony to pick us up in a vehicle of some sort, and we didn’t want to frighten anypony.
We had agreed to be picked up on Applejack’s farm, because it had the space needed or something like that. There was more important things to focus on than silly details. Trixie was happy to see everypony together, it had been a long time since a family gathering like this had taken place.
Pinkie was always fun to see, she always liked Trixie’s tricks. There was still a little bit of a sore spot left with Applejack form the last time everypony got together. (Trixie misread her attachment to her lasso for something else. Offers were made, embarrassment was had.) Rarity was always fun to talk to, she made Trixie’s new wardrobe at a very reasonable price. Fluttershy was oddly happy today, but Trixie had no idea what the reason might be. It was great to see everyone talking and having fun.
Of course, Twilight and Dashie’s friends weren't really Trixie’s family, but she could pretend. Trixie had no idea where or who her real family was, so she simply substituted her mares’ friends. The best part was making their fillies call Trixie their ‘Great and Powerful Auntie’.
Those three weren't so young anymore. There had been an accident with a spell and a time machine. Apple Bloom, Scootaloo, and Sweetie Bell had been gone for three years for all of us, but a decade for them. The three had apparently sworn to somepony very important they wouldn’t talk about their adventure unless it was important to the immediate situation. Something about wibbly-wobbly time and flux capacitors.
They were grown mares now, in their late twenties, even if they didn’t act like it most of the time. In truth Trixie preferred foalish ponies to mature ponies. The spark of childhood is a wonderful thing no pony should fully extinguish.
It was always nice to watch small town ponies. Trixie travels a lot, so she gets to see how ponies act all over. In big cities ponies always stuck close to their special somepony, like they were afraid somepony else would steal them away. In smaller towns where everypony knew, or at least knew of, everypony else, groups would mingle fluidly, with special someponies occasionally meeting back up to catch up on the others time so far or share a meal.
If this were a city, AJ and Rarity would have been side by side, not a few dozen yards apart talking to Fluttershy and Pinkie. Also Trixie would be sandwiched by her mares. Ponyfeathers, if this were a city she probably would not have her mares.
The idea of couples was simply too ingrained into ponies of Trixie’s age. Mini-herds like her own were exceptions, even though most everypony preferred multiple partners. Sometimes social reforms simply go against how ponies naturally behave, accidentally making us sadder rather than happier. Fortunately for everypony who ever felt horrid for liking someone in addition to their lover, that silly idea was slowly dying. Love was slowly becoming free again.
Though most ponies wouldn’t have noticed it. Trixie was lucky to have traveled so much, it gives a pony a unique point of view to see how all the different ponies like to live. You get to see what makes ponies happy and what makes them sad.
Which is why Trixie was happy her friends and loved ones were going on a real trip for once. World saving adventures didn’t count. A pony needs to stop and smell the roses to say she has traveled. There would be new things for everypony to learn, everypony would probably come back with an extra bag filled with neat new things. Trinkets from the roadside. Trixie had a lot of trinkets.
Everypony had packed at least three bags for the trip, so Trixie had volunteered to watch the bags while everypony else chatted excitedly about what might happen later today. The bags offered some protection from the horrible coldness of the winter’s first wind.
After some time talking to Dashie, Scootaloo detached herself from the herd and trotted over to Trixie. “Hey Aunt Trixie… Can we talk?”
Trixie did not like that tone. It was the tone of an awkward conversation about to strike like a bag of hammers falling from a cliff top. “Well… Trixie supposes she could talk with you. What is it?”
“Er- Well, when you live in the same house as somepony else you notice things you're not supposed to… You know bedroom stuff.” Scoots mentioned as awkwardly and bluntly as an appropriate metaphor for her shambling speech.
Trixie’s ears drooped. “This is not an appropriate topic for being in public.” she said, tapping her hooves together nervously.
“Well, yeah but it’s rare that mom or Twilight isn’t all over you… I just wanna know what the stuff with the straps and stuff is called so I can-”
“Ask anypony who isn’t with your adoptive mother, please.” Trixie pleaded.
“But were going away for a whole year!” Scoots protested.
“It’s still very hard for Trixie to see you as an adult Scootaloo.” Trixie groaned, “Even then, it’s not appropriate to ask a family member those kind of questions.”
A sneaking suspicion built up in the back of Trixie’s mind. She had to ask something. “Who would you be playing with? Trixie doesn't mind talking about her niece’s first dates.”
“Okay…” Scoots whined in a perfect Dash impression. She opened her mouth to say something more when a loud rumbling in the distance made everypony’s ears perk.
Trixie turned around to get a look at what could be making the sound. After a few moments a large, dull sand colored boxy vehicle with an orange stripe down the side pushed it’s way out of the forest’s edge. It was like one of the self-driving cars in the Griffon Kingdom, only huge, and painted in a horrible color scheme.
“Oh my Celestia,” Rarity moaned dramatically, “that thing’s coloring looks even worse then I remember!”
“You’ve seen that before?” Apple Bloom asked curiously.
“Yeah! Two months ago when we did that thing with the Diamond Dog mine. The pilot's really cute!” Pinkie said excitedly bouncing in place. “You know, for a bipedal mishmash of different creatures, but in a more blenderized way than a chimera or a hippogriff. Or a chimicherrychanga.”
The vehicle rolled to a stop a few yards ahead of the herd with a squeak of metal on metal. A small door on the side popped open a moment later, and a green eyed, pale green maned changeling poked her head out, looking around for a moment before spotting us and waving. “Hey! I’m Ad’ika, is everypony ready? I’ll help you load up your bags and stuff.”
“I remember you!” Twilight said with a smile, quickly frowning, “Did your wounded friend get healed?”
Ad’ika nodded and stepped out of the vehicle. For a changeling, she was oddly developed. Trixie had been to several changeling hives, she knew what each changeling caste looked like, and none of them had quite as distinct a shape as this one. This intrigued Trixie.
“She’s doing great! It was nothing her Highness couldn’t fix.” Ad’ika’s horn glowed, several small hatches along the bottom of the vehicle popped open, revealing spaces to place our bags.
Everypony moved forwards, dragging their own bags with them. After Trixie put her own three large duffel bags into one of the cargo spaces she tapped the green shelled buggy on her shoulder, “Trixie would like to know if all of your hive has a unique appearance.”
She blinked as she was tapped, tilting her head in confusion. “Then she can ask me?”
Applejack laughed and shook her head at the changeling. “Ah-deeka was it?”
“Ad’ika.” Ad’ika corrected. “Less emphasis on the ‘a’.”
“Sorry, that’s just my accent.” AJ apologized then pointed a hoof at me. “Well, as ah was sayin, she’s Trixie. She always talks like that.”
“Oh! That’s odd. No offense meant.” Ad’ika said turning back to me. “Yes, we all have a unique look. Our hive has a lot of ponies in it, most of us are at least one tenth pony so we are a little different looking from other hives. Is there any reason you speak in third person?”
Everypony’s heads quickly whipped around to look at Trixie. Trixie had never been asked that question by anyone in town before. Their reactions would be amusing.
“The Great and Powerful Trixie was told in magician's college that smoking poison joke would enhance a unicorn’s magical ability.” Trixie answered truthfully. “So she tried it. Now Trixie speaks very distinctly.”
Everypony was quiet for a good long while. Trixie tried not to giggle at their expressions as they process that fact.
Twilight broke the silence first. “Er- hon, Zecora has a poison joke antidote. We could swing by real quick before we-”
Trixie shook her head. “Touching the flower can be reversed, but not smoking it. Trixie already asked Zecora, many years ago. It’s okay, Trixie actually enjoys her idioms! It only affected her speaking, not her mind.” Also her internal monologue, but they did not need to worry about that.
“Did it work?” Sweetie Belle asked curiously.
“No. Trixie does not recommend smoking flowers of bestow curse.” Trixie said with a giggle. “She used to be quite the silly filly.”
Ad’ika shook her head. “Well at least you didn’t start randomly shifting every thirty seconds. I napped in that stuff once.”
The buggy swept her hoof towards the door. “If everyone would get in we can get underway.”
Dash, Twilight, and Trixie waited for everypony else to get in. As Twilight stepped into the vehicle she gasped. “Oh my gosh! I don’t remember it looking like this!”
Trixie peaked into the machine curiously. The inside was very sleek looking. Shiny black floors with a silver grid separating the floor into tiles, glowing orange shapes made from light showing… things decorated the walls. There was plenty of space for everypony to sit, a full table, couch, and two large chairs left enough room for everypony but Ad’ika and Trixie to take a seat.
Trixie didn’t mind sitting on the floor, it was smooth, shiny, and warm to the touch. Unlike her bed had been this morning, or the cold winter air had been outside. In fact, the odd little vehicle was rather warm. Pleasantly warm.
“Is there some sort of magic heating in this?” Twilight asked curiously.
There was a squeak as a chair in front of the large window at the front rotated to reveal… an adorable pink furred bipedal unicorn mare with perhaps a touch of feline blood in her! To Trixie's greater shock the mare smelled a bit like a stallion as well as a mare, she also was fully dressed in a black and red skirt and vest outfit. It looked very military-like, but was also quite sexy due to being what looked to be high quality artificial leather.
“The Sagan doesn't have any magic in her. She’s pure tech.” The Blue and Pink Adorable-Alien-Mare said in the cutest singsong voice. Trixie swore she was from a species which had somehow weaponized cuteness. It was almost scary.
“I’m Taylor Shepard, captain of the Sagan, and a member of Phoenix's Hazard Squadron. I’ll be taking you to your new home today, if you have any questions, please keep them in your mind Phee will answer anything you might want to know when you get there. Frankly, I don’t know too much about things yet. I’m still studying up on the tech.” she introduced herself with a little half bow before turning her seat back around.
Ad’ika pulled the door shut and trotted over to the other chair in what Trixie assumed was the wheelhouse. The buggy turned her chair around to face everypony as the vehicle started to move forwards with a slight lurch.
“I’d be happy to answer any simple questions you may have.” she informed.
“Oh oh!” Twilight thrust a hoof into the air a half second before Trixie suspected anypony had even thought of a question.
“Yes?” Ad’ika asked politely.
“What powers this vehicle?” Twilight asked eagerly, “When we were tracking you guys in the badlands I swore it had a mag-”
The vehicle lurched to a sudden halt, sending Trixie sliding a foot towards its front end.
Taylor turned around slowly in her chair, a rather frightening look on her face, and said in a serious, rage barely contained tone, “First rule of the Sagan, do not talk about it’s power source. Do not even think about the concept of power at all, and above all else, do not, and I am serious, do not think about these rules. Just no thought at all about the power supply...Thinking about it shorts it out.”
“She’s serious.” Ad’ika said in a supportive tone. “Please, someone ask another question. We can't get moving again until we have power.”
“Also we will be flying to Gaia, so seriously, don’t make us crash.” Taylor pleaded.
Rarity nodded grimly, clearly holding back a comment about the stupidity of such a power generator. “I see, well, I for one would like to know how homes will be arranged. We are all good friends, but we have our own intimate relations. I am sure you know ponies enjoy privacy for certain activities.”
“All living quarters in the city of Gaia are groups of bedrooms centered around a shared common room, attached by a hallway to the rest of the living complex.” Ad’ika answered. “Er, we have not assigned you one because well, how many rooms will you need?”
Pinkie grinned and began to point to everypony as couples. “I’m single, so is Shy. Rarijack are an item, and so are the Great and Powerful Twidash!”
Trixie blinked, “Did you give everypony terrible romance novel couple names?”
“Yeperooni!” Pinkie giggled.
Trixie facehooved along with everypony else. Except the buggy who giggled.
“Oh good! Ponies do multiple partners. That would have been a culture clash from hell! So that's seven rooms then?” Ad’ika asked.
“Er- Just five, actually.” Apple Bloom shyly informed, looking away from her sister with an embarrassed look.
“Bloom…” AJ sighed. “Everypony knows you three are together.”
“Yeah,” Dash added, “You guys are grown mares, you spend all of your time together, like literally all of it, and you grew up together.”
“We’ve known since you came back from your… misadventure.” Rarity added gently.
“You’re not mad? Or weirded out?” Scoots asked cautiously.
Trixie rolled her eyes. “Plenty of ponies date one of their foalhood friends. Everypony here is okay with Trixie having two special someponies. You should stop being silly.”
“You three were inseparable as fillies, and then you had a ten year long adventure together. It’s only natural for you three to grow close.” Twilight soothed. “I know you promised somepony you wouldn’t talk about what happened, and I’ve respected that. I’ve had my own time travel problems. But as your mom I would like to know how you three well, you know. Nopony forced you to do anything did they?”
The three quickly shook their heads. “Oh buck no! We just had nopony else to get close too.” Scoots exclaimed.
“We were the only three ponies around for like eight whole years.” Bloom elaborated.
“Friendship evolved, that’s all.” Sweetie finished.
Pinkie giggled, “Everypony figured you three were a thing since you were in high school anyways.”
Ad’ika nodded, “Yeah I was stationed in Ponyville for a while a few years ago. I thought you three might be a thing.” She made a face as if she were thinking before smiling, “If you don't mind sharing your common room with my friend Tess, Taylor, and myself, our flat has five empty rooms. It would be nice for it to be filled up.”
Everypony had a brief conversation, eventually agreeing this seemed like a good arrangement.
“This should be fun! I’ve never lived somewhere with shared space before. Is it like a big living room?” Fluttershy asked.
“Yeah that’s basically what they are.” Taylor answered from the cabin as the vehicle suddenly lurched forwards again. “Um, not to change the topic, but I’ve been meaning to ask something since I first got here. Is everyone bi or gay in your society? Because I seriously haven’t even heard of a straight couple yet.”
Twilight grinned her ‘lecture pending’ grin and began to launch into a thirty minute long explanation of pony relationship dynamics. Everypony else just tuned her out like usual. The occasional bit of speech made it past our defenses despite our best efforts to stay awake.
“As best as our equinopologists have been able to discover, early ponies formed large herds in excess of thirty individuals… so since stallions exist at a one per five mares ratio… The estrus cycle overrides a pony’s normal preferences temporarily, ensuring opposite sex mingling... which meant the smaller herds of the Solar Era were responsible for the lack of population growth… Rainwater’s spell allows same gender couples to have children together, but it’s risky health wise…
“In summation, all mares are bisexual, but prefer other mares to stallions except when in heat, and most stallions prefer mares. Not to say there aren't mares who would rather be with a stallion all the time, or there aren't stallions who like other stallions, far from it, they are just rare. It’s a natural form of population control we evolved due to our natural preference for groups of tightly knit lovers over pair bonds.
“In fact, many sociologists have said the mated pairs movement is starting to die out with my generation. In three or so generations we can expect small herds of lovers to be the norm again. Which psychologists have shown are more conductive to healthy relationships for our species anyways.”
Twilight beamed Taylor a smile at the end of her speech. The poor information overloaded mare nodded dumbly and turned back to look out the window. “Right. Okay.”
After a moment Taylor added. “My species is kinda the opposite. Most of us like the opposite sex, and we tend to have just one er, mate.”
Dash tilted her head in confusion, “Opposite sex? Um, how does that work? No offense, but I can smell your genders and-”
“Yeah, I wasn’t always like this.” Taylor interrupted shyly. “Just… be careful if you ever end up in Phee’s medbay. She has, quirks.”
Trixie blinked, wondering if the pink fuzzy thing was implying what Trixie thought she was implying. Before Trixie could ask her question Taylor pointed a finger out the right side of the vehicle and announced, “Oh hey! You can see Gaia! Why don’t you take a look? Let’s resume this conversation never.”
“Already? But I haven’t felt us move!” Applejack objected as we all moved to look out the windows as best we could.
“We’re in the badlands already! How the hey did we get here so fast?” Twilight asked excitedly.
“The Sagan is capable of flight at Mach twelve point eight, and inertial dampeners keep you from feeling the discomfort involved with flying at such speeds.” Ad’ika said proudly.
“Yeah, Phee helped me soup the old girl up really good after she got the basics of the city built.” Taylor informed.
Trixie gasped as the changeling city came into view. There was no way Trixie could call it a hive, the hives she was familiar with were carved into stone, organized like mazes, and creepy-in-a-fun-way to be inside. This was nearly the opposite of such things.
Lying beneath her on a sea of a sand was a shining city. Every building was made from glass and a shimmery silvery substance Trixie suspected was electrum. Large blackened metal plates covered large parts of many buildings, giving a flat black contrast to the shimmering silveryness. Also for some reason, glowing green neon lights were everywhere, forming geometric patterns. Trixie assumed this was because the buggies liked them.
The city had a wall which wrapped around the city, from above it Trixie could see it formed a large arrowhead shape with one side a bit squished. The buildings in the city seemed to be mostly pyramids of varying sizes, but Trixie could also see a large dome made of hexagons in the center of the city.
The most striking feature was two huge towers which soared up into the sky even from our altitude. The towers were shaped sort of like an upside down omega symbol, but more of a ‘u’ shape than an ‘o’ shape. Like a horseshoe with flared flat bits at the tips planted curve first into the sand.
“The towers are the living complex. It’s where most of us will spend our lives. The other buildings are laboratories, factories, hatcheries, and other infrastructure related buildings. The wall complex is a defensive fortification containing shield generators, weapons encampments, and extends beneath the city’s foundation to prevent Tatzelwurms from digging into the city. That was a problem the first week of construction.” Ad’ika quipped.
Fluttershy winced. “All that glass… The sun shining off the buildings must make every room in the towers so bright and hot.”
“Actually every single room’s windows are polarized to prevent glare from getting through. Also you can set every single aspect of your room’s environment for your comfort. Humidity, air circulation, temperature, the works.” Taylor said happily.
Trixie blinked and looked over at Taylor, “Did you just say we can control the room’s temperature?”
“Yeah. Full climate controls. Beats the hell out of my old trailer.” she replied.
“The great and Powerful Trixie can not wait to land!” Trixie exclaimed happily, comforted immensely by the knowledge that while living with her loves in this shining city she would never have a cold morning again.
Yaay, the Sagan has got an upgrade.
Can Phe work on the Hyperjets next?
Or will there just be a Cuisineart in the galley?
If the city is in a diamond shape, is that the old boundary of Phe, if so, given she launched, is she in a crafted cavern, or in geosynch orbit or where?
I ship it,
I am the force of adorable itself! MWAHAHAHAA!
still doesn't work that way....
I loled
Not a bad chapter but somehow I feel lost as it seems to have skipped somewhere. maybe its part of other stories I don't know. You suddenly have Twilight and Trixie together, the CMC had vanished for a number of years and they are packing for a trip. In the last chapter Celestia was just putting things together to let them know and Phee had taken the emerald hive into space
6033602 I'm glad you liked it!
6033619 That's just parts of my AU. Here's an overview of events.
https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1-NOx54djM6cTOmCdUJ7EZJGq-0_Iv5nysjDEKzBPuuA/edit?usp=sharing
New at Taco Bell, the Skittles-flavored Pony Burrito. Don't ask what's in it. $1.99. Runs from the Border.
That will never stop being cute.
You tell her Trixie! Blanket stealing is tantamount to treason in my eyes. I wonder if this is why I'm frequently single...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kVZ82SuWzTA
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dW5tVpSNg9M
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OIawjhzvq0I
Totino's® WOW! Thanks Mom!
Words to live by.
Scoots, you are asking the wrong pony. You don't talk to relatives about that. Trust me when I tell you, there is at least one pony in your non-familial circle that can provide this information to you. For me, it was my best friend that I've known since 1st grade.
That explains so much. The crazy and willing-to-try-anything-once bri_chan is interested in this.
allmystery.de/i/t1c0324_1350688593976.jpg
Awwww!!!!
Neither can the Excited and Impatient bri_chan.
------
whined - unless she, you know... glug glug, wined.
powers
**character speaking - Ad’ika** Based on how Ad'ika spoke for the rest of that paragraph, I think this correction should stand but I could be wrong:
'are' not 'is'
6033629 helps some still feels like there is sudden gap or jump in time
Great, now I want pizza rolls... I like Gaia as a name though, oddly fitting.
6033695 I secretly think Meep is in cahoots with the pizza roll industry.
6033660
This is why my girl and I use sleeping bags.
Check the author's note. That was a real card trick.
Funnily enough, both the ponies she wants to do it with could tell her.
You get he same effect as normal, but there is no way to remove it. It's a mean trick plaid on pones in college.
Don't worry, she'll get better.
Good catch on the way Addy speaks! I fixdadid it.
6033695
6033722
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kILEaRxbF6g
6033742 Yeah yeah, I know, Dr. Orpheus, Master of Mysticism. Been a diehard Venture Bros. fan since the beginning. What would even be in an Equestrian pizza roll anyway. Normal pizza rolls are just pepperoni, mozzarella and marinara.
6033739
Oh, I've seen it before. I tend to do a back and forth when creating my comment, so sometimes when I get to the author's note I have to edit my comment. Othertimes, I leave it exactly as I wrote it.
Worse part is, it probably won't even cross Scootaloo's mind to ask her lovers. Here's hoping it wont take her too long.
I don't think I've ever had that level of prank played on me in college, but then I only play a pony on the internet.
*whew* I've been trying to be extra cautious on character speech corrections after that last time, hence the red-text and the justification.
6033763 Well some pegasi do eat fish. But in this case it's not actually food, it's shaped and flavored magical essence which vanishes after an hour as per the cantrip Prestidigitation, which Trixie simply casts with the presistant metamagic feat to be able to use the power for the entire day. Though Twilight and co think it was just cheezy maranarie cheesey rolls.
6033742
I'm familiar with Dr. Orpheus, but it also seems like you've caused at least a few readers to desire pizza rolls. Hence the comment.
6033763
They have hay bacon, so I'm sure there is some substitute for pepperoni involving hay.
6033770 Scoots is a bit derp. She assumes if she docent know something, her friends don't.
6033789 Well some pegasi do eat fish. But in this case it's not actually food, it's shaped and flavored magical essence which vanishes after an hour as per the cantrip Prestidigitation, which Trixie simply casts with the presistant metamagic feat to be able to use the power for the entire day. Though Twilight and co think it was just cheezy maranarie cheesey rolls.
6033789 Hayperoni
*Gets shot for terrible horse pun...*
6033628 I'm glad you wrote it!
6031855
*hugs*, eh. With affectionate joy, your welcome, eh.
6033804 Hours later and I'm still laughing at that. I want my pizza with hayperoni and extra cheese please.
6035398 Would that be Amareican cheese?
6035405 marezzarella
6035408 That's much better! Especially if you top it with Pamarezan cheese too.
6035465
I've mixed in G1 since the first story I've written. Nopony's noticed yet besides you just now.
Nah, that's going to the coner store for a coke. Alpha Centauri is less then 5 LY distant. With her maximum velocity of her secondary FTL drive only of 150c, Phee covers 1,350 trillion kilometers per year at full speed, or 44,968,868,700 meters per second. That 4.3 something LY trip takes her ~18 hours. On her "space hopper" backup drive.
On the primary drive she can cover the distance as soon as she calculates the jump with about 5 minutes of travel time. Huzah for internal mass relay.
6035490
I believe that's because many of us (read: stallions) only know G4. I've read enough stories on here to recognize the name Megan Williams, but that's the extent of my non-G4 knowledge. Probably because if you were male and growing up in the 80's the absolute last thing you'd be interested in was My Little Pony. I'm certain if you told my 6 year-old self that, when I was older, I'd be watching My Little Pony I'd think you were nuts.
Oh, I also know that Rainbow Dash always dresses in style.
6035780 Do you have any skills? From what I understand the Emerald Hive is an Equal Opportunity Employer. Service means Citizenship.
6035653 Heh heh heh... G1 facts dump! The Smooze is a G1 arcane disaster (gray goo nanite equivalent) created by three human witches because fuck those ponies. Triek and Scorpan are huge G1 villeins and Spike was their always fucks it up minion. Humans lived in "Equestria" in G1 but were very very rare and it was implied they were lost or trapped there. G1 plot summeries for episodes read like horrifying evil messages from a hell beast recalling the torments it put out that day
Oh and the orgional G1 version of the EoH was called the Rainbow of Light and basically blew motherfuckers to hell. Aside from the terribad music numbers and the occasional filler episode... it was dark and twisted as all hell!
Oh and, G1 episode 55
6036827 ...you know, for kids!
6036087 Funnily enough the city's anthem is:
Popular vote selection can be wierd.
6036858 Look, you don't have to try and sell me & Trixie more reasons to land the ship faster. We're sold already. It's not like I'm looking for reasons to visit the medbay.
Does a papercut count?
6036871 "Oh my! I feel under the weather. Perhapse i need to undergo a medical scan." "Huh? Oh! Yeah! Sure! Psst, size prefrences?"
6036914
With Phee's quirks, that's a loaded question. Around the same level as asking a djinn for a wish.
6036928 Very true. Only a non malishious (kinda) one.
6036956 Based on how well Taylor, Tess & Kaily turned out. And previous artistry, such as Armored Heart. I think I'd through caution to the wind and say that my answer is: surprise me.
*evil laugh cackling in the background*
6037022 One bad decision later... "Oh good! You're still sapient! I thought I fucked up there. I wanted to see if I could take a mammal and turn them into a plant based life form. Good news! Totally did! Thansk for that consent form by the way."
6037064 <I never would have thought of that> Cool! Now to go find me an earth pony.
6037119 Heh. I've been writing TF stuff for a decade now :P You find cool ideas after a while.
6037189
TwixiDashGreat and Powerful Twidash? Works for me, I like TwiDash and I like Twixie, surely a hybrid of the two will be appealing.Random theory, her real family is associated with the Tribunal, which is why she can do magic Twilight can't follow along with.
The Sagan? Twilight is so going to kill the engine again.
Huh. Well, that's as good an explanation as any.
And there we go, got it in one.
Dang, pretty awesome city in just four months, but it's entirely believable given the level of technology that Phee is throwing around. I'm curious whether there's any significant meaning behind the city layout or the shape of the two residential towers.
6037266
It's odd, but the arrangement works. Dash and Trixie have as much in common as Trixie and Twilight, and Dash and Twilight go together greatly as well. If the glove fits...
Random theory, her real family is associated with the Tribunal, which is why she can do magic Twilight can't follow along with.
Spoiler: Trixie is a clone of Genesis produced by the Arc in an attempt to crack magic's workings. The lab which made her was destroyed by tribunal forces and her clone pod was discovered by a group of pony farmers who took her to a hospital, and as she was a "teen" she was put into foster care before attending magician's college. She is actually a multicalssed sorcerer/rouge with 5 levels in arcane trickster for a total of 12 levels. None of this matters much to her. She's happy with the life she made for herself.
Yeah she can bamph out the buildings in a few weeks, but the reason it takes a few months (and things are still being built) is stuff like interconnecting every building properly with the power grid, making sure the computer systems are in synch... There is still ground work to do despite the fact she built those towers in a few days they were not habitable for a month. Also there is more cosmetic stuff, like designing architecture which changelings like (square rooms creep them out. They like rounded corners.).
The towers are also significant as they contain a few important bits of technology related to teraforming.
I predict four chapters till everypony in the mane six has visited the medibay XD
Also, Trixie is fucking adorable.
Thats all.
6040174 Four? ... Well jsut see about that!
6037064 Hold on... I finally know who made the Supox at least, but I still do not know if it was phee or the precursors, so maybe not.
6043085 Phee hasn't yet made any lifeforms on Equis. That would be Faust.
6043100 What about on other planets, say... Beta libra I.
6043104 Phee has been under that hill since she crashed 3 hours after being reprogrammed to fly that hull. There are a few lifeforms on previously human held worlds which she made, but they are just plants. Like, edible plants. Her original function was to engineer better/new foods.
This story seems like it is going places.
Excellent, excellent places. I love the way you write trixie, it's flupping adorable.
6033602
The force of cuteness, eh?
Use the cu-, eh.
"The cu-tips?", eh.
NO, THE CUTENESS, USE THE CUTENESS TAYLOR, EH.
USE THE CUTENESS, EH.
YOU GAVE TAYLOR A RED UNIFORM, EH?
NOOOOOOO, THE CURSE OF THE REDSHIRTS WILL RETURN, EH.