If there is one thing I hate about this world is how people judge others by how they look. The ones that fear change and something new. Don't want what stand out from the rest, either be by the size, height or the way they talk. They judged by their first appearance. This is the thing I hate in this world and I'm not talking about my world.
No I left my world to go to this one. Such beauty and such colours that I would never find in my world. Like the creatures and the art and its foundation of its nation and kingdom. But most of all its philosophy. Magic is friendship.
What's there a philosophy like this in my world? Of course not. My world is filled of stubborn and narrow minds to ever think something like this. First appearance is so important that if you do something out of the ordinarily they'll brand you as something else altogether. But that's not the worst part, the worst part is that this is common in my world. So common that it became part of our cultures, stories and legends. I couldn't live in that world any more. I had to run away from it and find a new one. I wished for a better world and wished I did. Somehow the power of wishes can come true with purists of hearts. My 'wish' came true.
Somehow I was teleported to a forest with an unknown name I cannot remember. But the forest was moist and very dangerous from The creatures living inside of it. But for some reason these creatures was more afraid of me then I was to them. Wolves made of wood would howl in fear from the very sight of me. Manticores would run the opposite direction from me and even the Hydras would hide their heads in the very swamps they live in just by looking at me. I never understand why but they didn't hurt me or disturb me because of it. In fact they helped me get used to life in the forest and told me what was good and bad in it. To put it bluntly they were my servants and I was their master for some reason. This was perfect and do you know why? First they feared me, but over time they trusted me and see me as part of the forest as they are. They turned from servants to my friends and I hold friendship very close to me. If one of them was in danger I would help them.
I think the forest was good. But I was raised in a civilisation not the wildness and so I went out to find one because I lived in a old and broken castle in the middle of the forest and it was moist and dirty. I asked my forest friends if they know civilisation nearby. I learned from them that there was. A small town not too far from here and some of them said they were very nice, so I went to find this small town.
The trip was not that long and not that boring the same time. It was peaceful and very relaxing. The birds sang their lovely songs, The flowers bloom and smell divine and some timber wolves play fighting with each other. To say the trip was all lovely and fun, it was. Soon enough I reach this small town my friends told me about.
This town at first was a very pretty place, The building look like it was in the Middle Ages but I expected that because the world with mythical creatures lives in it, yeah must be the Middle Ages style buildings, they hold many beautiful flowers like it's just been picked up from the forest itself. So fresh and so beautiful. Then I look at the locals that lived here. No surprises that they were not Human, but ponies from mythical legends and real life like Pegasus, unicorns and normal ponies. But what I notice was something else. They were all different but no one cared about it. They smile, laughed and talked like they were just normal people. Tell me this is paradise? When no one judged about someone's appearance and sees them as a normal person to be friends with? How much I would love to join them and make more friends. But I found truth in this false paradise town. The horrid truth.
I entered the town with open arms as if to see an old friend I haven't met in a long time. I couldn't wait to be part of society. At first they started to panic like there was a house on fire. I was okay with this after all my friends in the forest was scared of me at first. I just have to adapt with them. But then they cried monster and beast to my very face. Why did they call me that? I thought everyone was different and they liked it that way. But when I arrived, they scream and shout monster. I tried to tell them that I was friendly and I mean no harm. But they didn't listen and I think they didn't want to anyway. Soon enough six pony was in front of me. Two Pegasus, two normals, one unicorn and one that had wings and a horn. Look like they are ready to fight me for some reason. But why? I haven't done anything and now they look like they were going to hurt me. I trying to tell them again that I am friendly and I mean no harm, but They didn't care nor would they listen to me anyway. The rainbow one called me a 'horrific monster' and other horrid names while her friends agreed on all of them and giving some of their own to me. Why are they saying these things to me? I have done nothing to them. Before I could say something, the one with the horn and wings tried to zap me with her magic. I dodged it quickly and ran back to the forest while they were chasing me as if I was a criminal. I ran past the borders between the forest and hidden behind some bushes. I looked back at my pursuers to see them stopped at the borders. They turned back to their town where a large group of them was then cheering their names as heroes, some of them said that they save them from the monster. Me? A monster? I have done nothing to them and they just looked at me and... judged me by my first appearance. I left my world to escaped from stubborn fools to only be in another just like mine. My wish was nothing more then a lie, a false vision of a better world. I wanted to cry but shock and disbelief catch me first as I walked back to my ruin castle with my forest friends.
The walk back to the castle was a slow and sad one for I am now stuck in another judgement world where first appearance was judged as well like my world. All my forest friends saw and maybe felt my sadness and came to me with pity and concern about what was wrong. I told them about what happen and they too were shocked about it, some were even angry about this that some wanted to go there themselves for what they did to me. Some of the timber wolves even stayed with me in the castle to keep me safe and to give me some company. I was very grateful to have them as my friends as I slept in one the old beds in the castle. But it'll seem that even in sleep, I would not be able to gain some peace.
In my sleep I met a dark blue pony that had a horn and wings. It didn't looked happy. It asked why I attacked the town. Lies! I never attacked them! They attacked me and called me a monster! But it said that I'm lying to it and to tell it the truth which I continued to tell it what happen, but even then it still didn't believe me and then it left. Then the nightmares came in Therefore for now on. Terrible nightmares, nightmares that makes you scream at the top of your lungs and make you wish to not go back to sleep again. All because I told it the truth and it didn't believed what I'd said.
For five years this happened and it hasn't change a bit. I couldn't take anymore of it if it wasn't all of the forest friends keeping me safe and helping me get through of it. They wanted a monster so I'll give them one. I'd been looking through old books in the castle on magic and studied magic like the elements of water, air, fire and earth while learning the laws of nature from scrolls telling me about how Telepathically communicate with all of my forest friends who too hated those ponies that have done me wrong. Soon I'd learnt a lot of the books and scrolls and was ready to show them the monster they wanted. After all I want to show my new appearance to this world after all.
Soon I was at once again at the border of the forest and where all of this started. With all of the forest top predators ready and all the power of the elements flowing through my fingers and myself. I saw the ones that caused me all the harm to me and even the one that creates all of those nightmares every night. I let out a huge roar as every creature from the forest charged toward the town and soon I follow while floating above the ground with the power of the air.
After all. I want to make a new and improve...
First appearance.
I'm not going to judge nothing. But you had better have a sequel planed for this it was great.
5870894 Maybe... If people wants a sequel then I'll make one soon. But only if they want one
5871137 I know it's been done, but perhaps an alternate path in the story in which Luna believes the human?
5872141 mmm.... maybe not. However that idea might be good. But perhaps.... Its a 50/50
5872141
Or even, human goes to Canterlot and confronts Luna about the nightmares and such.
5872483 But how judged the human first and attacked?
There has to be a sequel to this. I really wanna see the ponies get what they deserve for their xenophobic arrogance.
5872493
He has Elemental Bending on his side. Assuming it works like Avatar, it would be pretty safe to assume the human would be fine against civilians, nobles at that. The guard I don't think would pose too much of a threat either, if he had his Everfree friends on his side for assistance.
The only real problem he would have is if he were to bump into any princesses and/or the Mane 6.
a sequel is needed!
5872539 gifrific.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/indeed-harry-potter.gif
So if the Mc has Avator-ish powers, then the Earth ponies can probably detect him because of their connection to Earth. Probably by sensing disturbances. Then again, such disturbances can be used by the MC to send messages.
I do have to ask a few things.
Is the planet sentient?
If so, then whose side is it on? ( I suspect neutral)
If a sequel is written, will the ponies learn that their xenophobia has created an enemy?
5872948 yes by growing farms. But HE is a human which means he can do more then grow crops hehehe
A sequel would be amazing.
5873013 Luna shouldn't be able to read human minds? One, we are aliens and two, the stuff in our heads would send the Princess into a comatose state!
I'm going to sound like a douche, but fuck it.
This needs more down-votes. 29 likes? Seriously?
Maybe other people don't mind horrible, horrible grammar, but liking a story this poorly worded?
The fuck?! This isn't quality, asking for a sequel from the guy is also going to encourage him to write like this rather. Fucking critique him and help him improve. The story itself is a nice idea, but my G-d you move way too fast. For everything that happened within you could have probably written up to 6000 words. A measly 1600 is not going to cut it for the type of story you're trying to set here. But for the love of G-d, please edit your shit.
Maybe you're not a native English speaker, then fine, you have an excuse, barring that, there's no way you actually speak the same way as you just wrote this. Please, PLEASE improve upon your writing or get an editor who'd be willing to deal with it. Again, you have a solid idea, just work on your actual understanding of English.
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........ Not sure if you're saying you're foreign or not.
Since I have no idea how to respond I'm going to put up the image I use when I don't know how to respond. That, and it's like 4 AM here and I haven't slept for approximately two days.
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5872881people who wants a sequel hear me out. I have been reading your comments and I am now thinking of... making the sequel. However as you are the ones that wants it, I would like some ideas.
Do you want the human to be a villain or a anti-hero or even the one that goes to war with this judgement world?
Do you want new creatures to help him fight?
Do want the element to have a form of its own? Like earth being a tall, strong giant or the fire as a anger rage demon
Linking to this, would using the elements change the human's personality while using it?
And finally do you want the human to ally with other villains or new OCs to fight with him.
Let me know
5873888 i think the human should be a anti-hero because the whole ''the ponies wronged me in some wayb so i shall go to war/kill them all'' thing has been done alot. maybe have the human go and confront Luna who has been filling the humans dreams with nightmares. and if there is a super evil threat that plans to destroy every thing maybe have the human stop it, because after all the human would not want to have his animal friends hurt right?
You cut it off too early.
5873975 thinking of making sequel
5873905 interesting. like the idea but what about the elements? Should they be sentient or not?
5873987 nah thats also done alot, maybe have them some what sentient like not enough to talk but enough to have feelings
5873905 NO!!! its not Evil i they deserve it!
5874012 i never said it was evil just that it had been done alot and they do kind of deserve it for attacking him but it was only the mane six that attacked him the other ponies of ponyville just call him beast and monster and hid from him (and Luna gave him Nightmares) i don't really think you should attack the whole race because of what a few ponies did. if they all started hunting him (as in the whole race) then they all deserve it (except the children)
5874035 but they all called him a monster, so they all deserve it
5873888 For elements, there should be forms, but also emotions. For example, fire = rage.
Also, maybe Discord could see the beauty inside him?
EDIT: Maybe like the color wheel...
Red, Blue, Green.
Fire, Water, Earth.
Rage, Sad, Happy.
This would also make mixtures, like Tearful Rage.
5874043 so if i walk up to some one and say ''your a monster'' i deserve to die?
5873013 And I suppose he conveniently has all the skills and equipment to manufacture an atom bomb?
Seriously, most of you wouldn't even stand a chance in hell against me on a bad day. The ponies have tussled with a god of chaos and won. Your sort are nothing.
Not to mention, why on earth would the ponies be freaked out by a thin, hairless ape-like creature that looks like a severely deformed small minotaur?
They'd probably pity the hideous thing. Maybe ask if it wanted to be put out of its misery.
5874447 wow I... I just... wow
5874501
Just ignore him. He appears in comments to such fics all the time.
5874967 noticed
Are there other stories where the human becomes an ally to the indigenous population of the Everfree? I can't find anything.
5875997 this is one of them
http://www.fimfiction.net/story/248527/a-new-me
5876221 Hm..how did I miss this? Damn you Google.
There's no such thing as a perfect world. Every single world with life has their flaws.
5874043 Under that logic the world should be a wasteland because there are some terrorists in it.
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Will This character Have Hypnophobia in the sequel?
Because 5 years sleeping the same nightmares must not be Healthy in a psychological way
5879267 parhaps
5879293 Man really?
I would never endurance 5 YEARS OF TOTAL NIGHTMARES every night
In my opinion that would't be possible
5879323 you'll have to wait for the sequel
Which is just coming out very soon
5879462 YAAY
5879472 indeed
5873983 Go for it man. We've got the conclusion or perhaps a full story then.
5879513 Bravo! Also may I ask a question? Will there be POV for the ponies and what they thought when they chased him out?
5890679 Yeah it going to be both side of the story (If the dam people moderation it!!)
5890931 Wonderful!
Wait a second, now that I look at your page.. You made 'The Cost of Revenge' too?
I love that story!