Hold the Press

by Bunnybooze79

Chapter 9

“I suggest we all leave at the same time.” Rarity instructed the waiting ponies. “While we leave through the front door Rainbow will take Pinkie out through one of the upper windows and lead the reporters away.”

Rainbow Dash nodded in confirmation and flew up into position with Pinkie in her grasp. Fleur and Applejack waited a few paces behind their friends. The only clue to their whereabouts was the scarf Rarity had given them.

“We take the direct route to my boutique while Lyra and Vinyl do whatever they have planned.” Rarity explained further and ignored the knocking on the front door. Lyra saluted while grinning widely.

“What about us?” Twilight asked and pointed her hoof at herself and Spike standing beside her. “Do you want us to help with the fashion show?”

“No, dear.” Rarity shook her head. “You have the most important task. You have to find some legal way in one of your books to see if there is some way to keep those nasty reporters away from Fleur while she is here.”

“Right.” Twilight had already begun compiling a list in her head with all the books she would have to consult. “You can leave it to us. If there is a way, we will find it.”

“Take a deep breath, ladies.” Rarity instructed and took a deep breath herself. With her magic she unlocked the front door and opened it.

The torrent of nosy reporters was stemmed by Lyra and Bon Bon in the first row. The former using maybe a tad too much force to push the reporters back.

“Move it!” Lyra snapped at the nearest reporter. “Ponies want to get out.”

Cameras had been readied and pointed towards the ponies coming out of the castle. As their initial target was not to be seen they only half heartedly took one or two pictures out of reflex.

“Where is Fleur?” One of the more vocal reporters asked.

“Who’s that?” Lyra’s bluff was about as convincing as Twilight’s bluff earlier.

“There she is!” One stallion pointed a hoof up towards a window. On cue Rainbow Dash had made her exit and rather slowly let the assembled mass of ponies get a look at the fake Fleur in her hooves. Before anypony could see through the deception Rainbow sped off. Not wasting a moment the group of reporters bolted after the fleeing pegasus.

After the dust had settled the now alone ponies couldn’t help but smile. So far their plan had worked, but the real diversion would now begin.

Rarity split off from the group with her helpers and quickly made their way towards the boutique. Lyra and Vinyl briskly trotted towards Lyra’s home while the invisible Applejack and Fleur took the long road towards Sweet Apple Acres.

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“What do you have planned?” Vinyl asked Lyra for the third time. “And don’t say you’ll see!”

“You will find out.” Lyra grinned back but chose to give Vinyl a bit more information. “Rarity’s idea with the fashion show is nice, but it will not occupy the reporters that are only interested in more….uhm…unusual stuff.”

“Unusual stuff? Like what?”

“You’ll see.” Lyra chuckled as Vinyl groaned in frustration of not receiving a clear answer.

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“Quickly now!” Rarity opened the door to her boutique and led the way inside. “We only have a small time to prepare. I’ll take care of the advertising outside and prepare the stage.”

Rarity ushered the three mares over to the little stage in the middle of her shop’s showroom. Octavia looked around with interest. She had never actually been here before since moving to Ponyville some time ago. Her interest in dresses had been minimal at best. A collar and bowtie was all she needed on a day to day basis. The girlish side of her was looking forward to playing dress up, something she had not done during her childhood.

Fluttershy was less enthused about having to model some dresses for the reporters. It wasn’t the part about dressing up nicely that she disliked, but rather the fact she would have a lot of ponies watching her. Her time as a model for Photo Finish had not been pleasant and she had only gone along with it for her friend. As Fleur was a pony in need she felt it necessary to put her discomfort to the side for the moment and participate in the upcoming show.

Bon Bon had been scowling all the way over to the boutique. She was less than happy to take part in some kind of fashion show. It wasn’t a secret that the sweetmaker was slightly obsessed with her weight. Ponies would look at her funnily anytime she brought up that topic as it was clear that Bon Bon had a good figure and didn’t need to worry about her weight. Naturally she didn’t listen and assumed they were just being polite. It had developed over time in her resenting Rarity for no other reason than she being a fashionista and thus responsible for putting the idea into pony’s minds that all models needed to be super thin.

On occasion she had expressed her one sided dislike towards the fashionista by simply pretending not to know who she was or did. If Rarity held any animosity towards the sweetmaker it was never shown and that just ticked Bon Bon off even further. Even stranger was the fact that the weight obsessed mare was good friends with not only a super thin model, but also the most famous one of them all. And it was for her sake alone that Bon Bon held her tongue in check as she was directed by the fashionista towards the back area behind the stage.

Rarity quickly divided the numerous dresses on clothes-racks amongst the three mares and instructed them on what to do. Octavia happily picked out a first dress to wear, Fluttershy meekly took the first one in the row and Bon Bon just randomly picked one while grinding her teeth.

Rarity spent little time preparing the stage. All she did was adjust the lighting and turning on some classical music. Having Vinyl here would have been preferable, but it would do for now. It took her a couple of minutes to locate her sign. It had seen better days and was a relic from the time she had put on a fashion show with her friends a long time ago. Out of sentimental value she had not disposed of it and now it seemed it would be put to good use.

Outside not a single pony was seen. The sun had begun its decent and it would be dark in two hours or so. Most ponies would most likely be at home preparing dinner. That made it easier to locate the crowd of reporters following Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie through the streets of the town. Numerous hooves pounding on the ground could easily be heard and from its sound they seemed to be coming closer.

Rarity quickly set up her sign and waited for any activity heading towards her. She didn’t have to wait for long as Rainbow Dash with her cargo rounded a corner at the end of the street. Rainbow Dash was flying at a rather leisurely pace, at least for her standards, but despite the slower speed the reporters were struggling to keep up.

The pegasus zoomed past Rarity and only a hooffull of seconds later the reporters came galloping past Carousel Boutique. Rarity cleared her throat and addressed the crowd loud enough to be heard.

“Esteemed journalists of the fashion-world!” Rarity used her magic to illuminate her sign. “Now is your one time chance for an exclusive fashion show!”

The mass of reporters slowed down and came to a stop in front of the boutique. All of them were breathing heavily and kept nervously glancing between the shop and Rainbow Dash circling slowly at the end of the road.

“Is Fleur going to participate?” A mare asked while wheezing heavily.

“No, she is not.” Rarity saw that they were about to leave again. “But you will have the only chance to view Fancy Pants exclusive collections for the next two seasons!”

A small murmur of excitement went through some of the reporters. Rarity smiled politely and opened the door to invite them inside. As predicted some of the reporters more interested in the fashion aspect indeed went inside.

“Wanna go?” Quick Shot asked and readied his camera.

“No….” Scoop was not too keen on attending the show. “I’m not interested in dresses, but rather what’s underneath. Let’s go!”

Only a third of the reporters actually went inside the boutique. The rest bolted towards Rainbow Dash who then stopped circling to lead them somewhere else. Rarity hoped the others would have some good plan to keep the rest of them occupied.

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Vinyl followed Lyra upstairs in her home.

Despite Vinyl’s constant questions regarding her plan the lyrist remained silent. All she had said was that they needed some vital pieces from her home and Vinyl had no choice but to follow her. When Lyra led the way into the bedroom Vinyl felt the need to speak up again.

“What do you have planned?” Vinyl noticed that unlike the rest of the home the bedroom was chaos in its purest form. Magazines were strewn everywhere, some of them about fashion, sweets or other relatively normal topics. Some of them were of a more adult variety she noticed.

“We need a disguise!” Lyra trotted over to the large wardrobe and opened it. Moments later she levitated a large chest out. It was big enough to house a laying down pony with ease.

“A disguise?” Vinyl watched as Lyra opened the chest revealing a mishmash of various articles of clothing. “For what?”

“We’ll give them something to write about.” Lyra rummaged around in the chest for a moment. “Where is it?”

“Need any help?” Vinyl offered while casually looking at one of the more adult magazines lying open on the floor.

“I thought I….aha!” Lyra exclaimed triumphantly as she finally found what she was looking for. Without another word she pulled a mask over her head. A purple mask hiding her features with a large hat. “Tadaaa!”

“What are you supposed to be?” Vinyl assumed it was some kind of comic book character.

“The Mysterious Mare-Do-Well!” Lyra thrust a hoof towards the ceiling and struck a pose.

“Who’s that?” Vinyl wasn’t much of a comic book buff.

“You don’t know?” Lyra took off the mask again and held it in her hoof. “Ah, no you wouldn’t know her. It was something that Rainbow Dash’s friends did.”

“Huh?” Vinyl had not been living in Ponyville at the time and thus had never even heard of Mare-Do-Well.

“I’ll explain later.” Lyra looked around and found the rest of the costume lying on a pile in the corner of the room. Without any other explanation she trotted over and started putting the costume together.

Vinyl shrugged and decided to have a look in the chest for something else that she might be able to wear. “I am guessing we’ll be some kind of superhero team?”

“Keep guessing.” Lyra grinned unseen by Vinyl and began climbing into the Mare-Do-Well costume.

“What…the…hay…” Vinyl spoke slowly with some amusement in her voice and turned to Lyra with something she had found in the chest. “What are these?”

The DJ held a blonde wig with a cheap felt cowpony hat in one hoof, while a pair of fake cyan Pegasus wings along with a rainbow colored wig were being held in the other hoof. Vinyl’s grin nearly split her face at the momentarily stunned look Lyra was giving her.

“You didn’t see nothing!” As quick as a flash Lyra snatched the objects from Vinyl and stuffed them back into the chest.

“Just why do you have those things?” Vinyl laughed as Lyra shoved the wigs into the chest.

“None of your business!” Lyra snapped back.

“Does Bon Bon know you sometimes parade around in a Rainbow Dash costume?” Vinyl just had to needle the other unicorn a bit further. A small bit of revenge for Lyra keeping her in the dark about her plan thus far.

“Of course she does!” Lyra seemed genuinely offended that Vinyl would think she dressed up while alone. “We…we like to role play sometimes. Adds a little spice if you know what I mean.” Lyra added after a moment.

“As Applejack and Rainbow Dash?” Vinyl shook her head with amusement.

“Sometimes.”

“Sometimes? Do you have any other wigs I should know about?” Vinyl already assumed that Lyra had the full set to dress up as the element bearers.

“You most certainly do not need to know about them!” Lyra carefully put the fake cowpony hat in the chest covering up an electric blue wig with a cheap par of purple sunglasses and a jet black wigs with a lacy bowtie. She hoped Vinyl had not seen those particular items as she closed the chest and levitated it back into the wardrobe.

“Hey, don’t put it away.” Vinyl noticed that Lyra closed the doors with enough force to make a point that Vinyl was forbidden to try and open them again. “What about my costume?”

“Your costume is in the living room.” Lyra trotted out of the room a fetch whatever she had planned Vinyl to wear. It only took her a couple of seconds and didn’t give Vinyl the opportunity to have a snoop around in the chest. “Here it is.”

Vinyl caught the bundle of clothes that the lyrist had tossed to her. She didn’t have to examine what it was she held in her hooves as she instantly recognized it from before.

“No.” Vinyl replied with a flat look.

“Why not?” Lyra tried not to smile and failed miserably. “Come on, come on. We haven’t got much time left and I need my sidekick.”

“Oh, you’ll get a kick to the side alright if you think I am going outside in that!” Vinyl dropped the raunchy outfit on the floor. “What kind of a sidekick am I supposed to be? Captain Scandalous and her sidekick Spanky answer all questions that you dared not ask before?”

“Hmmm…” Lyra thought about it for a moment. “While I do like the sound of that we are not giving them an interview.”

“What then?” Vinyl sat down and crossed her forelegs in front of her chest. She wasn’t doing anything unless Lyra explained what her plan actually was.

“We’ll distract them.” Lyra nodded to the bundle of clothes in front of Vinyl. “Give them a glimpse that might distract them long enough for Fleur to make a getaway.”

“A glimpse?” Vinyl looked at the outfit on the floor. “They’ll recognize me!”

“Relax.” Lyra held up a hoof to calm down the DJ’s protest. “They expect that from you anyway.”

“They? Who is they?” Vinyl was genuinely baffled that somepony was expecting her to wear something like that out in public.

“The smut patrol calling themselves reporters.” Lyra shrugged. “You are a DJ and it is expected that you act a little wild.”

“I don’t know what kind of DJ’s you know, but I do not go wild like that!” Vinyl flicked the pile on the floor with a hoof. “I am not exposing myself that way.”

“Ok, ok.” Lyra nudged the outfit closer to Vinyl. “I thought you might object and thus I have the means to hide your true identity.”

“Really? How?” Vinyl remained skeptical.

“Just put it on and you’ll see.” Lyra returned putting on her own costume.

Vinyl sighed and took apart the bundle of clothes. The sight of the socks and the ridiculous saddle made her blush. Despite the outrageous premise Lyra’s plan would indeed distract the reports for a while. For Fleur’s sake she began to put on the first article of clothing, but paused halfway as she was now aware that Lyra was watching her intently.

“I can’t do this if you are watching.”

“Ok, ok.” Lyra held up her front hooves in defeat and trotted past Vinyl. “I’ll be waiting downstairs in the kitchen.”

Lyra quickly trotted downstairs and searched for something she would need momentarily. Only a few minutes later she heard Vinyl come down the stairs. A second later the fully dressed DJ entered the kitchen wearing not only the outfit but also a very prominent blush. Her head would easily pass as a tomato, a very uncomfortable tomato.

“Suits you.” Lyra said after whistling appreciatively at the sight.

“Shut up.” Vinyl felt strangely exposed which was odd as she normally was naked. “Let’s just get this over with. How do you want to hide me?”

“With this!” Lyra held a small bag of flour in her hoof. “It worked for Pinkie earlier and it will work for you.”

“Flour?”

“Yep. I’ll just cover up your cutiemark and powder your mane and tail.” Lyra said and immediately began to do just that with her magic.

“Where did you get this outfit from anyway?” Vinyl asked while Lyra applied the flour.

“Rarity made it.” Lyra concentrated on the task in front of her.

“She did?” Vinyl had no idea what Rarity actually offered to make in her shop. The only times she had been there had been purely social visits or helping her with her fashions show by supplying the music. “I didn’t know she made these kind of things too.”

“I had to beg and promise her not to tell anypony where it was from.” Lyra paused for a moment. “Whoops.”

“The secret will be safe with me.” Vinyl had a good relationship with the fashionista and would not jeopardize it by spreading any rumors.

After a while Lyra was satisfied with her work and stepped away from Vinyl to give her one last look all over.

“Here.” Lyra levitated a pair of black sunglasses over to the DJ. “For a bit more anonymity.”

Vinyl took off her regular pair of sunglasses and donned the black pair. It was still obvious to recognize Vinyl if one looked close enough, but as they had no real intention of standing still the disguise would work.

“Good.” There was one last thing that ruined the picture slightly. “You can stop blushing now.”

“I can’t.” Vinyl really wished she knew the invisibility spell Twilight had used earlier. It would be very useful right about now.

“It kind of ruins the overall effect.” Lyra scrunched up her nose in thought.

“Well sorry…” Vinyl huffed and sat down. “I can’t just switch it on and off I’m afraid.”

“No problem.” Lyra levitated the bag of flour once more. “We’ll just cover it up.”

After applying nearly all of the flour left to Vinyl’s face Lyra had managed to mask the constant blush. Happy with the result she led the way to the front door.

“Ready?” Lyra asked.

“I guess…” Vinyl wasn’t too thrilled to expose herself like that to the public, but in absence of any other plan she would go along with it.

They left the house and mercifully nopony else was around to witness the strange pair. They slowly made their way to the end of the road.

“When they see us…” Vinyl asked with a hushed voice. “What do we do then?”

“We run.” Lyra answered, her voice muffled by the mask she was wearing.

“Run? Run where? Back home?”

“Nah. We give them a run around Ponyville.”

“Wait, wait, wait.” Vinyl stopped immediately. “We run around Ponyville? Like this? You never said anything about running!”

“You keep saying you want to go jogging.” Lyra shrugged and despite her wearing the mask Vinyl could see her grin wide. “Now at least you have some incentive to go through with it and not get caught.”

“I never signed on for any kind of physical exercise!” While it was true that Vinyl kept telling herself and others that she could do with some exercise, this scenario was not the way she had imagined it. “Forget it! I am going home and will follow Rarity’s plan.”

“Too late…” Lyra stared at the end of the road where Rainbow Dash came flying around the corner.

The pegasus did a double take as she saw the painfully familiar figure of Mare-Do-Well standing in the middle of the road. She nearly let Pinkie fall when she spotted the figure next to Mare-Do-Well wearing what only could be described as provocative. It took a moment for Rainbow Dash to realize that it had to be Lyra and Vinyl executing their plan. Rainbow and Pinkie flew by, both of them eyeing the pair with wide eyes, and only moments later the reporters rounded the corner.

“Time for a little jog, Vinyl.” Lyra murmured and got ready to run away.

“Oh, ponyfeathers.”

Comments

[MidnightFMare]

This is why Lyra is best pony